I lost my memory after throwing the ball and running over the total crematorium

Back at Shen's house, what greeted He Jingnian was chaos.Zhuang Manyin tried to look for him during the day but couldn't find him, and then heard from some fast-talking servant that he seemed to be going to see Mr. Yuan, and immediately became anxious.

Shen Peng explained to her that Niannian was only going to participate in the activities of her daughter's children's group, but she didn't listen, she just clamored for someone to rescue Niannian quickly, so that Niannian could not be let by that cold-hearted boy from the original family again. Bullied.

After such a commotion, chickens flew and dogs jumped, and it didn't die down until He Jingnian came back.Zhuang Manyin was terrified. Now the more he looked at He Jingnian, the more he looked like Xiao Yu, and the more he felt like him, the more panicked he became.God gave her a chance to get her lost child back. She really can't lose him anymore.

Didn't Nian Nian also lose her mother very early, and has been lonely all this time?I will treat him well and love him as my own child.Therefore, he must stay in Shen's house for a long time, so that he can see him every day, right under his nose.

"Aunt Zhuang, don't worry, Tang Feng and I have already discussed, and according to your wishes, the wedding will be held as scheduled." He Jingnian comforted Zhuang Manyin, shook Shen Tangfeng's hand, and said, "Tang Feng, these few days If you're free, let's choose a dress together."

Shen Tangfeng was taken aback, as if he hadn't expected him to make a decision so quickly, almost as if he was catching up with a very urgent task, and he didn't dare to delay for a while.

"Okay, okay." Zhuang Manyin smiled happily, "Niannian, do you still call me Aunt Zhuang?"

He Jingnian moved his lips, "Mom...Mom."

Zhuang Manyin's eyes sparkled strangely, "Call again."

"Mother."

This time, it seemed natural and natural.

The day of the wedding is getting closer, and He Jingnian is pulled by Zhuang Manyin every day to pick out various things.As big as the on-site team, as small as a cuff on the dress, she has considered everything and must be the best.

He Jingnian could understand her feelings very well. If Shen Tangyu was still there, Aunt Zhuang would definitely be as happy as she is now, happily preparing for the most important wedding in her life for her most beloved child.

The life in Shen's family is peaceful and warm, with elders who treat him like parents, and fiancé who is gentle and considerate, there will be no quarrels and anger, and nothing that will make him sad will happen.He has always longed for such a harmonious and happy family life, and now he has finally got his wish.

It's just that, many times, once his attention is emptied, he will involuntarily think of something else.Think of that bright red apple.

After bringing it back, he hid in the room alone and cut it open. Because it was too sweet, the moment he put the pulp into his mouth, he couldn't help crying.

If he thinks too much, he will have a headache, not a physical pain, that kind of pain can clearly tell the location, but he just feels the pain.He covered his ears and buried his head under the pillow again. There was still a constant buzzing sound coming from the eardrum, and it was transmitted to the depths of his mind, jumping suddenly.When it was the worst, the temple seemed to be pried open, and then things were poured into it continuously.

Broken pictures, vague sounds, the only certainty is that they all come from the original speech.

——Niannian, you love me very much.You really love me so much.You'll die without me, that's the extent of it.

——Niannian, I am so happy.Now you belong to me all over again, clean and tidy.

——Every year, I swear that I will give you back the grandest wedding. Our family will be together happily forever, okay?

——Niannian, if, if only I could know that you love me so much earlier, then I will definitely love you a little more.

A strong sense of dizziness struck again, He Jingnian reached under the pillow, as if looking for some life-saving medicine, and quickly found out the Walkman that Yuan Cisheng had brought back.The moment I plugged in the earphones, the feeling of dizziness faded away like a tide, replaced by the clear feeling of bathing in the moonlight.

I don't know when, he has to bring this Walkman to sleep every night, and it has almost become a dependence.

Liao Xia is Liao Xia, and the voice of the original speech is the voice of the original speech. He seems unable to unify them.The original speech is what he wants to resist, but Liao Xia can like it without any burden.Liao Xia is a person from the past, an untouchable beauty.When a person reaches out to catch the moon, others will only say that he is romantic, and they will not think he is greedy.

Tonight, He Jingnian had another good dream, or an afterimage of memory.

In the dream, he became a young man again, reading a storybook with a certain boy.He couldn't see the young man's face clearly, but he knew that the young man was very beautiful, and he could still smell the bitter fragrance from the young man's body, which was exactly the same as in winter.

The young man gave him a jar of fruit candy. The exquisite glass jar was written with winding foreign characters. The candy inside was wrapped in colorful paper, colorful, crystal clear, and extremely beautiful.

He was reluctant to eat this can of candy, so he kept it carefully, and sometimes he would take it out to have a look.When viewed in the sunlight, the candies shimmer like real gems.Of course, the most important thing is that this jar of candy was given to him by the boy, as if it had become some kind of sweet secret between the two of them.

sugared.

Who told him not to taste those candies, but to worship them devoutly.

When he woke up, He Jingnian found that the pillow was wet from crying.

The next day, He Jingnian went to the studio early in the morning.No matter how busy he was preparing for the wedding, he still had to see every bit of it, and he couldn't let the work at hand be left behind.

Once there, he saw someone standing at the door. Who would come to him early in the morning?When the person turned around, he couldn't help being even more surprised that it was Wu Hui, the president of the Chuanyuan City Jewelry Designers Association.

Wu Hui was very busy. If it wasn't for an important matter that concerned the face of the entire industry, she wouldn't have come here on purpose.She made a long story short, saying that the higher authorities had already decided, and hoped that he would participate in the nationwide jewelry design competition held by Shengheng.

"You are bringing honor to our city." Wu Hui resolutely did not give He Jingnian a chance to hesitate, "Work belongs to work, life belongs to life, this is also an excellent opportunity for you, don't miss it."

He Jingnian hesitated for a while, but finally agreed.Wu Hui nodded in satisfaction, saying that's all right, she knew he would definitely go.The association has registered for him, and he can start preparing for the preliminary competition.

On the same day, He Jingnian told the Shen family about this matter at the dinner table.

"It won't affect the wedding." He repeatedly emphasized.

Shen Peng smiled and nodded, saying that young people should concentrate on their careers.Zhuang Manyin hesitated to speak, but he gently pressed his hand.

The preliminary competition is to draw design drawings based on the propositions published on the official website, and then submit them to the mailbox of the competition organizing committee.He Jingnian is particularly prone to mental burnout recently, and he is barely doing some metal work, but it is very difficult to do creative work.Design needs inspiration, but he has no inspiration, his brain is rusted, a heavy mass of iron, unable to move.

After a lot of effort, he barely finished the design draft.Zhu Jingyuan saw it and praised it as usual.But hearing her tone, He Jingnian knew that it was actually much worse than before, but this was already his limit.

After being shortlisted for the preliminary round and entering the semi-finals, He Jingnian completed the second design drawing. The moment he pressed the send button, he immediately covered his mouth and rushed to the bathroom, vomiting violently.

After vomiting, he rinsed his mouth and washed his face, cheered up and went downstairs to eat.Zhuang Manyin is not allowed to serve unless he sits at the table.

At dinner, Zhuang Manyin brought him many of his favorite dishes as usual.He pretended to have a lot of appetite and ate hard, but Zhuang Manyin still caught the clue and asked him if there was any problem in the game.

He Jingnian shook his head, saying that he had handed over the plan for the rematch.

"Then if you participate in this competition, will you see the original speech?" Zhuang Manyin asked again in such an understatement.

Shen Peng coughed softly, "Manyin."

Zhuang Manyin smiled, "I'll just ask casually."

Soon, the results of the rematch came out, causing an uproar in the industry.Among the contestants shortlisted for the semi-finals, He Jingnian was the last one with the lowest score and passed the line.Until then, he has always been a popular candidate for the winner.

He Jingnian was also surprised that he could still enter the final.He doesn't want to enter the final at all. The final is the most difficult part to draw on the spot within three hours, and the judges will score the contestants' works on the spot.He knows very well that his current situation simply cannot withstand such a high-pressure creative environment.He has no inspiration, no ideas, and the pen feels like a weight in his hand, Jiang Lang is not far away from him.

Anyone who is engaged in creation will definitely feel fear in his heart if he feels this way, but He Jingnian does not.He used to love this profession very much, but now he is gradually losing motivation.Once, looking at the gemstones sent by customers, he kept thinking, what are these, why can't he even distinguish their colors?

No light, no color, no meaning.

He fell headlong on the bed, He Jingnian put on his earphones and covered himself with the quilt.

So be it.

The announcement of the finals was released.He Jingnian looked at the date and place above, and was in a daze for a while.

On February [-], Enci Welfare Home.

In the evening, Yuan Cisheng called him.Amidst the subtle sound of electric current, no one spoke.

After a long time, the original voice spoke first: "Are you okay?"

"Why do you ask?"

"I've seen your design for the preliminary round and the semi-final round."

He Jingnian was taken aback, he didn't expect Yuan Cisheng to be able to find the problem from the two pictures. "I'm fine, but I've been busy recently and I'm a little tired."

"What are you busy with?"

He Jingnian didn't answer him, "Why did you decide where is the final?"

"No reason."

"Even if I go, I won't remember anything."

"Whether you remember it or not has nothing to do with me."

"Yes...ah." He Jingnian curled his fingers slightly, "No one will care about the past."

"That's good, I wish you the best of luck."

"Wait a moment."

"Any thing else?"

"February [-]nd...is it a special day?"

"It just happened to be on this day according to the schedule. What's the problem?"

"It's nothing."

"It's okay, I'll hang up first."

"Again……"

Yuan Cisheng had already hung up the phone.

He Jingnian threw away his phone and covered his head under the blanket.

He knew that he should worry more about whether he could draw anything on the day of the finals than worrying about what day February [-] was, but he just couldn't help himself not to think about it.After being bored in the dark for a long time, He Jingnian suddenly felt a strong nausea in his stomach, rushed to the bathroom and vomited out all the food he had eaten at night.

Holding on to the edge of the basin, he was dizzy and couldn't stand upright.

Finally came the day of the finals. On the way to the Enci Welfare Institute, He Jingnian kept sketching the appearance of the building in his memory. It was old and decayed, full of mildew and rot that could not go away.He didn't know why Yuan Cisheng set a competition of the highest standard and highest level in such a dusty place.

The lower corner of the city, the center of the shanty town, that kind of place is really quite different from Shengheng's high-end and luxury brand image.No matter how crazy the original speech sounds, it is impossible to make fun of the hard-working family business.What's more, it is absolutely impossible for the two of them to indulge in the past things now.

"Sir, we're here." The driver reminded.

He Jingnian recovered from his trance, looked out of the window, and couldn't help but widen his eyes.

"Did you drive in the wrong place?"

"Aren't you going to the Enci Orphanage? Here it is."

"Why did the Enci Orphanage change like this?"

"Sir, haven't you been here for a long time? My family lives near here, and the place has changed a lot three years ago. It's that famous big group, what's it called... Shengheng, yes, that's it, you I must know. It is said that the big boss of Shengheng sponsored a lot of money to transform this place into a boarding hope school for children to study until high school. If you get good grades and go to college, you can continue to support them Where did you finish college?"

He Jingnian stared out the window, as if talking to someone who does not exist here, and asked, "Why?"

"What and why?" The driver was taken aback, "Oh, why did you build this school? I really know a little bit. I picked up a teacher here once, and he said that the big boss told their dean, what did his wife It is also in this orphanage. The conditions were not good before, and his wife has suffered a lot since childhood. He hopes that children like his wife will suffer less in the future, finish their studies smoothly, and enter a good university. Live a good life... Hey, what's wrong with you, sir?"

He Jingnian lowered his head and got out of the car immediately after paying.

It really shouldn't be here, he thought.No matter what Yuan Cisheng did, it has nothing to do with him.However, looking at this almost dreamy campus through the curtain of hot and sour tears, his heart seemed to be rubbed hard, and it hurt like a mess.

Can't cry, can't think.

When I repeated it for the hundredth time, my heart was too stiff.

At the opening ceremony, the host finished his speech and announced the design theme of the final in front of countless media cameras——

kindness.

Mercy... what is it?

He Jingnian rested his cheeks and held his pen in a daze.

The other designers have already buried their heads in painting, but he is the only one who is still thinking hard about the meaning of kindness.

Time passed by every minute and every second, I couldn't think about it, and I couldn't draw it.

What does kindness mean?What day is February [-]?Also, did I really meet Liao Xia... Yuan Cisheng, have you ever met here?

His mind was filled with silt, cold, dark, and sluggish, with heavy chains tied to his feet, binding him to keep falling.He opened his eyes, but he could only see darkness.

"Slap." The pen fell to the ground.

He held his head and kept shaking.

——Come, let's pray together.

The youthful voice that was as clear as a spring resounded suddenly, like the first ray of light piercing through dark clouds at dawn, lighting up the world.

pray?

—Today is Candlemas.

I have no idea.All I know is that you're leaving tomorrow.

——Don't show such a dejected expression, we will definitely meet again.Next winter vacation, I will ask my mother to bring me here again.

Will not.I know that once you leave, I will never see you again.I just know it.Because in the past ten years, I have never waited for you again.

——Candlemas is the end of winter and the beginning of all new life.People light candles so that the holy light can travel freely in the world.Here, you take a candlestick too.

He raised his head, the candlelight was flickering, but he couldn't see the boy's appearance clearly, like a scribbled painting.

I will wait for you.I will always be here waiting for you.If you don't come, I'll go find you.I will definitely find you.Even at that time, it doesn't matter if you have forgotten me, I won't be sad if I can't talk to you, as long as I can look at you from a distance, my wish is fulfilled.

—Let's pray together.Let God hear our voices and all kinds of good things will happen.

Name...tell me your name!Are you... are you... he...

The boy lowered his head and prayed devoutly.The figure was still submerged in the hazy light, no matter how hard he tried, he could only vaguely distinguish the outline.However, the voice became clearer and closer, touching his eardrums and echoing deep in his mind.

— But when the goodness of God our Saviour, and his love to man, were revealed, he saved us.Not because of righteous works of our own, but according to his mercy, washed by regeneration and renewed by the Holy Spirit.

—Love is patient and kind; love does not envy, love does not brag and is not puffed up.

— Bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

-Love never ends.Amen.

Disappeared.

Whether it was a boy or a boy with a good voice, it all disappeared.

He Jingnian was terrified, gasping for breath, and regained consciousness as if he had just woken up from a dream.

More and more pictures appeared in my mind, like a finger suddenly pressing the restart switch, the master tape was reversed, everything was backtracked, and the atrium was used as a curtain to re-stage.

Thinking of it, he remembered it all, everything.

Christmas at the Enci Orphanage, the boy's arrival, the first time he talked to himself, giving him a gift, and leaving without reunion.

The boy was his god, his miracle, divine grace, the star that led him to Jerusalem.

The boy appeared on the night of the Nativity and left on the morning after Candlemas.

But, hope, the teenager left him hope, friendship and promise.

He waited and waited and waited and waited, year after year, but the boy never appeared again.But it didn't matter, he kept his voice to himself.As long as I listen to that clear and beautiful voice, I feel full of hope.

Beautiful, kind, kind, gentle.

Even if all the beautiful words are used up, it is difficult to describe, the most favorite person!

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Prayer from the New Testament