paranoid dependence

No matter how much time passed, no matter what happened, Gu Zhi always seemed to be an obedient little fox in front of Shen Nian.

Whatever Shen Nian said, he would listen to it.As soon as he went home, Gu Zhi really dropped everything and left with him, even though he was still out of the situation.

In the hotel corridor, Liang Qiu whispered to Shen Nian:

"You make an agreement with Gu Zhi that he doesn't need to do anything about Ning Wen's affairs, and don't let him think about these things again. He has been out of touch with society for five years. You, a middle school teacher, can't be Ning Wen's opponent. Deal with it. If Ning Wen beats him up again, the loss outweighs the gain. I will handle this matter, and I will definitely satisfy him in the end. The most important thing for you now is to make Gu Zhi normal. Although it was not normal before, it is too scary now .”

Although Shen Nian had heard about Gu Zhi long ago, and had seen his white-haired appearance in the surveillance, it was not as shocking as when we met him just now. If it wasn't for Shen Nian holding his hand, even if he Walking in front of him, Liang Qiu might not even recognize that it was Gu Zhi.

The changes are too great.

It's not just the change of appearance, but the feeling of the whole person is different.

Shen Nian nodded silently for a few seconds, admitting that what Liang Qiu said was correct, he and Gu Zhi were indeed not qualified to deal with Ning Wen, Liang Qiu's background and status were much more convenient and easier, and Shen Nian also grew up together. Do not evade at this time:

"Okay, then I'll leave it to you. I really don't have the energy and ability to think about this matter. I just want him to get better now."

"It will get better." Liang Qiu patted Shen Nian's arm reassuringly, and glanced at the direction of the room: "Go in and accompany him, we still have a lot of time to talk, but Gu Zhi is probably very flustered now, but just now I didn’t seem to be able to react all the way back, will I lose control when I recover later?”

Shen Nian shook his head: "No, he's easy to coax."

Liang Qiu recalled the obedient appearance of Gu Zhi and Shen Nian when they came back just now, and felt that he was a little worried: "Okay, go in quickly, I'm going to sleep too, call me if you have anything to do."

When Shen Nian returned to the room, Gu Zhi was still in the same posture as before Shen Nian left the room, sitting on the sofa in the living room, with his arms on his knees and his head bowed, his slightly long white hair covered his expression, but he couldn't stop The trembling hands still betrayed his emotions, he was restless and afraid.

Shen Nian was silent for a few seconds and went to the restaurant to pour a cup of hot water before walking over, sat down beside him, just put down the water, before he could say anything, Gu Zhi spoke first:

"You knew already."

Ever since Shen Nian appeared in front of Gu Zhi, he had been in a state of shock and hadn't recovered much, but it didn't mean he didn't think about why Shen Nian appeared there and why he knew Ning Wen. Use your brain to figure it out.

Shen Nian knew everything.

This cognition made Gu Zhi feel like falling into an ice cellar, not knowing how to face Shen Nian.

Shen Nian didn't deny it, looked at his trembling hands and said, "Brother Zhi, if I was the one who happened all these things today, would you want me to hide it from you?"

Gu Zhi didn't speak, Shen Nian sighed slightly, and stretched out his hand to grab his hand, but Gu Zhi got up and left the sofa, and walked towards the French windows, his footsteps seemed to be in a panic, as if he was running away, breathing Shen Nian could still hear the thick and heavy sound even at a distance of several meters.

He was about to lose control of himself, he was desperately suppressing it.

Shen Nian got up worried about him, but before he walked over, Gu Zhi couldn't restrain himself anymore.

"Why did you come?!" Gu Zhi looked at Shen Nian, his eyes forbearing and violent: "Who told you to come? I don't say those things because I don't want you to know. Why don't you not listen? You can't pretend that you don't know. What? What are you doing here? Huh? Pity me? Pity me? Or tell me you regret it?! I don't need it! I don't need either!"

The backs of Gu Zhi's tightly clenched hands are covered with blue veins, one look at him can tell how hard he endured, but no matter how hard he is, he won't hurt Shen Nian anymore.It's just that if he stays in this environment any longer, he can't guarantee that he won't do anything harmful, so he just wants to leave and stay away from Nian Nian, the only way to ensure that he won't really be hurt.

Gu Zhi wanted to leave, but Shen Nian stopped in front of him, looking at him without any fear:

"Why should I pity you and sympathize with you? Those feelings that you couldn't see when you were young, I will not put them on you now."

"If you really don't want me to know, you shouldn't come to me. Since you've come and made me aware of your difference, I can't ignore you."

"What right do you have to control me?" Gu Zhi looked at him amusedly, his hands were gripped harder than before, and even the veins on his neck burst out: "I said long ago that from the day you didn't want me, I would It’s not yours anymore, since it’s not, you can’t control me, and I don’t need you to control me!”

After Gu Zhi finished speaking, he was about to bypass Shen Nian and leave, but Shen Nian grabbed his arm just as he was about to pass him by. Seconds later, Shen Nian let go of him first, then turned around and raised his hands to hold his face, and under Gu Zhi's astonished gaze, slightly tiptoed and kissed him.

Gu Zhi froze in place, all the hostility in his body dissipated, what Ning Wen, what mental hospital, what burden, at this moment he couldn't think of anything, there was only one thought in his mind, eyes, and heart.

Shen Nian was kissing him, she took the initiative to kiss him.

Shen Nian didn't kiss him for too long, when he realized that Gu Zhi had calmed down, Shen Nian let go of Gu Zhi and asked him:

"Are you eligible now?"

Gu Zhi looked at him, in shock, without any reaction.

Shen Nian also felt that he was a little impulsive, and he realized what he had done when he was impulsive. This was much more exciting than saying that he liked stimulation. The stimulation made his ears turn red little by little, so red that he felt a little hot, but it seemed to be effective. That's right, Gu Zhi calmed down, but at this moment, the eyes looking at him seemed to eat him up.

Shen Nian couldn't bear this kind of gaze, and wanted to say something more, but Gu Zhi came back to his senses at this moment, took a step back, and said almost self-deprecatingly:

"Nian Nian, you really don't have to do this."

He still doesn't believe it, doesn't believe that he really likes him, doesn't believe that he just wants to kiss him when he kisses him.

A little helpless, but also a little bit lost. It was the first time I took the initiative to be a relative, but I was misunderstood as a means to stop him. It was indeed a means, but it was also sincere.

Just think about Gu Zhi's reaction, it seems there is nothing wrong with it, after going through such a thing, even a person like Gu Zhi will become sensitive and unconfident.

That being the case, let him believe it.

"I know your secret, and I'll tell you one of mine." Shen Nian didn't give him a chance to refuse, and said softly: "I lied to you about one thing, but I still can't sleep well, and I can still watch to my dad."

Gu Zhi raised his head and looked over because of Shen Nian's bad behavior, those bad emotions seemed to be replaced by nervousness and worry in an instant, Gu Zhi looked at Shen Nian, his eyes were full of him:

"Why? Has it been like this for all these years? Have you seen a doctor?"

At this moment, Shen Nian's helplessness and loss disappeared because of Gu Zhi's worry about him. He suddenly realized that the Gu Zhi in front of him had never changed, he was still the same him many years ago, he put himself first Bit, for his own sake he can ignore his own feelings.

My heart softened all of a sudden.

"Do you know why I saw my dad? Did Aunt Ning tell you anything?" Shen Nian looked at Gu Zhi.

Gu Zhi has completely calmed down, and his trembling hands just now have also calmed down. He gently shook his head:

"We rarely talk."

Thinking about it, even if Ning Jia did not do anything to hurt Gu Zhi again, it is impossible to forget the hurt Gu Zhi in the past. They must not have many opportunities to speak calmly, and Ning Jia will not mention that he once told Shen Nian What.

Shen Nian didn't explain anything right away, took his hand and walked towards the sofa, Gu Zhi obediently followed, Shen Nian pressed him to sit on the sofa, and he sat down too, obedient like a child.

About Shen Nian's conversation with Ning Jia eight years ago, he only remembered a rough idea, but he still remembered clearly about Shen Chongshan's last wish. He briefly talked to Gu Zhi, and said:

"You could see how guilty I was towards him at the time. I couldn't resist another dying wish, but that was when the relationship between us didn't develop in the direction they thought. Later you Kissing me secretly, the power of guilt and last wish has increased exponentially, I know how bad my situation is, how serious the hallucinations are, in such a situation I can only let you go..."

But if he knew what would happen to Gu Zhi after being pushed away by him, Shen Nian would definitely not make the same choice as before.

"I thought the hallucinations would disappear after you left, but no, although it's not too frequent, I still see him from time to time." Shen Nian looked at Gu Zhi and squeezed his hand: "I'm thinking of you When I do, I can see him."

Gu Zhi's breathing became lighter, he didn't even have the courage to look at Shen Nian, he vaguely seemed to know what it was for, but he wasn't sure if his guess was true.

"You can guess why, right?" Shen Nian looked at him.

Gu Zhi didn't answer, Shen Nian didn't wait any longer, and admitted bluntly: "Because I like you, even if I drive you away from me, I still like you, and I still go against my father's wishes, so every time I miss you, I still like you." It's a guilt for him, and everyone will see him."

Gu Zhi's hand trembled slightly again, and Shen Nian firmly held it:

"Gu Zhi, I didn't lie to you, I really like you."

Shen Nian said so much, if Gu Zhi doesn't believe it, he is no longer Nian Nian's little fox.

In the past, he would have gone mad with joy when he heard this, but now he just feels at a loss, the love he wanted to hear appeared at the most inopportune time.

"Niannian." Gu Zhi lowered his head and said softly: "You should know best. Didn't you push me away at the beginning because you didn't want me to be dragged down by your side? I'm worse now than you were then, I even I can't control my emotions, I don't know when it will explode, I will hurt you, I..."

"So you want to push me away?" Shen Nian interrupted him and asked him, "Do you want me to like you?"

Gu Zhi was silent and didn't speak, Shen Nian's expected denial didn't come, he kept silent for a few seconds, then let go of Gu Zhi's hand and got up:

"Okay, then you go, I'll go back tomorrow and tell my colleagues that I think the person I went on a blind date that day is actually pretty good, you can try dating, the kid dancing in the square is also cute enough, maybe I will get married in the future Once married, there will be..."

Before Shen Nian finished speaking, Gu Zhi stood up, grabbed his arm, turned around and pushed him against the floor-to-ceiling window, threatening him unbearably:

"you dare!"

Shen Nian held back a smile and looked at him: "Who are you? What right do you have to control me? Didn't you tell me that I belong to me? Then you don't care what I do or who I hang out with... um... "

Before he finished speaking, Gu Zhi kissed him, but he was not gentle at all, biting his lower lip as if angry and revengeful, until Shen Nian felt the pain and frowned, then Gu Zhi let him go , with his head pressed against his neck, he choked out two words angrily:

"no!"

"I think it's okay." Shen Nian pretended not to understand.

Gu Zhi opened his mouth and bit Shen Nian's shoulder, which was the same position as eight years ago, but this time Shen Nian didn't indulge him, and immediately pushed him away: "Don't bite, I won't be able to explain it if my other half sees it in the future." .”

"Nian Nian!" Gu Zhi's grip on Shen Nian's waist is constantly tightening. Even though he speaks rationally, he still can't accept the possibility that Shen Nian will belong to someone else, he can't stand it, he can't lie to himself of.

Shen Nian couldn't bear to tease him anymore, raised her hand to caress his hair, and said softly:

"Little fox, come back to me, I miss you very much, I miss you very much."