inferior possession

On Sunday, the sun finally came out, and it was very warm and comfortable on the body.

Ji Lu stood at the door of the store, looked up, turned around and went back to the room, moved a chair to sit outside.

Basking in the sun, Ji Lu sat at the door holding a large bundle of baby's breath, imitating Han Shuo's example of trimming, matching, and packing.

Han Shuo taught him a few times, that is, Lu studied it very seriously, and immediately packed a bouquet of flowers for Han Shuo after finishing the study.

Watching the man's slender fingers wrapping around the golden bandage, and a bow was tied in a short while, Han Shuo applauded with dignity, and stretched out his hand to hook Ji Lu's neck eagerly, "Brother Lu, you are a fast learner, it seems I have really hired good employees."

Dodging his hand calmly, Ji Lu pursed his lips, smiled lightly, and did not speak.

Ever since he was sent to the hospital by Duan Congzhen and treated like that by a stranger he didn't know, Ji Lu was extremely repulsed by the sudden touch of others.

Subconsciously, he always thought that those strangers were here to harm him. Although they looked kind and friendly on the surface, in fact they would stab him in the next second.

When he was with Duan Congzhen, he always felt that he was a lunatic, with a mental illness of persecution delusions.

At that time, Duan Congzhen would also take him to many banquets, most of which were disgraceful gatherings.

Once, Ji Lu was blocked by a tall and strong man at the door of the bathroom. The man drank alcohol and threw himself on him in a dazed and strange way.

Ji Lu told Duan Congzhen about this, hoping that he would stay away from that person in the future to avoid trouble.

But Duan Congzhen didn't think there was any problem.

"You think too much." Duan Congzhen looked at him strangely, as if looking at a monster, "Bambi, you are too sensitive."

Ji Lu opened his mouth in a daze, "I... sensitive?"

"You can't always think that everyone is going to hurt you." Duan Congzhen raised his hand to touch his face, comforting him perfunctorily, "You can't think that everyone likes you either."

"I...that's not what I meant." Ji Lu opened his eyes blankly, seeing the disgust flashing across Duan Congzhen's face, "I just said that man is not a good person..."

"Okay." Duan Congzhen interrupted him, waved his hands a little irritably, and glanced at him meaningfully, "He is not such a person, my friend does not need your evaluation."

That is to say, the deer did not mention this matter again.

Once again, the man pressed him against the bar booth, and Ji Lufa punched him hard in the face, causing his nose to bleed.

Going home tremblingly, Ji Lu told Duan Congzhen about this again, telling him that his friends wanted to get him drunk all night.

Duan Congzhen's face was hazy, with a little irritability, as if he didn't like hearing him say such things.

Ji Lu begged him not to have any more contact with that man, because his mind was impure, and Ji Lu was afraid that the man would get angry and hurt Duan Congzhen.

But he was really wrong, no one in this world can hurt Duan Congzhen, his heart is too hard, he only has himself in his heart.

He can step on anyone's corpse and climb up. He doesn't feel pain, let alone sympathy.

Duan Congzhen looked at him and sneered, "You said he was impure, so tell me, how did he force you?"

Ji Lu didn't expect him to ask such a question, he stood there in a daze, looking at the man with a mean face with a pale face.

Duan Congzhen lit a cigarette and smoked slowly, "What posture are you using? In a bar or a hotel?"

Even Lu's pupils trembled, his face flushed from the humiliation, he frowned at Duan Congzhen, his heart ached like he was suffocating.

"Brother Duan, how can you say such things..."

Duan Congzhen sneered, exhaled smoke rings comfortably, stared at him with deep eyes, "Then do you feel it?"

"Brother Duan!" Ji Lu Zhen called to him, his eyes were slightly red, and his Adam's apple was rolling up and down with difficulty.

Duan Congzhen didn't seem to hear him, stood up slowly, stubbed out the cigarette butt, and said with a low laugh, "Then do you think you prefer to do it with him or with me?"

Ji Lu didn't speak, and was roughly dragged into the bedroom by Duan Congzhen.

"Really think you're so pretty that everyone wants to fuck?" Duan Congzhen bit his red earlobe and said, "Stop being sentimental, he doesn't like playing with second-hand ones."

During that time, Ji Lu crazily doubted himself, whether he really thought wrong, everything was his own sentimentality.

No one has desires for him at all. He doesn't know good and bad, so he thinks that others have bad intentions for him.

Duan Congzhen told him not to be sentimental, one sentence can defeat all of Jilu's rationality, his fragile thinking, sensitive spirit, and abnormal past.

In the past, he really listened to Duan Congzhen's words, and even deeply reflected on himself, whether it was because of his sensitivity, low self-esteem, and strong self-esteem that he annoyed Duan Congzhen and made him dislike himself.

Only now did he know that those were just Duan Congzhen's means.

Duan Congzhen is too indifferent, and too smart, so indifferent that he doesn't care about anything other than himself. He has a clear purpose and vicious methods. He stands on the edge of the abyss and is persuasive. He can push the deer down without reaching out.

It is the easiest thing to deceive a person who is already deceiving himself. *

After recovering from the chaotic thoughts, the deer raised his head and stared at the scorching sky, until the sore eyes overflowed with physiological tears, and then wiped them away calmly.

He later figured it out, the injustices he experienced were not necessarily his fault, it was just Duan Congzhen's intentional manipulation, so he let him bear all the faults, until he began to notice something was wrong, until he was unable to bear it, Duan Congzhen had another chance , denounced him as vulnerable.

But even if you think about it clearly, even the deer has left sequelae.

Fear of crowds, the sudden approach of strangers, the small and closed dark room, and the accusations of others.

He has already left Duan Congzhen, but what Duan Congzhen left him is like a gangrene, like a nightmare, he can't get rid of it.

·

The work of a flower shop is not tiring, but very tedious. When dealing with flowers and plants, your hands are always wet, with green juice or gray dust.

The flowers delivered by the flower shed in the morning are all fresh, that is, the deer need to carry them to the store, untie them, keep them, and pack them according to the orders received the previous day. They often sit outside for a whole day.

Han Shuo noticed his hands, which occasionally had cuts from roses or other thorny flowers. Han Shuo reminded him to wear gloves, and the deer nodded in response, but he never put them on.

Even Lu doesn't like to wear gloves. He always feels that through the thick cotton cloth, he is always worried that he won't get the most realistic touch, and he is afraid that he will cut his fingers in a daze.

Han Shuo didn't try to persuade him anymore.

A few days later, Han Shuo came back with another bag of things. Ji Lu thought he was here to count the bouquets, so he didn't get up, so he nodded his head and continued to choose flowers.

Before cutting a few flowers, the arm was held, that is, the deer was in a daze, and the scissors were pulled up before the scissors were put down.

"Why..." Ji Lu frowned slightly, feeling that the arm held by him was a bit uncomfortable, and struggled quietly, pulling away from him.

Although Han Shuo is very friendly, the two have been together for a while, but Ji Lu is still not used to his enthusiasm.

Han Shuo was careless, and didn't pay attention to Ji Lu's repulsion. He took out a few pairs of brand new gloves from the small bag, grabbed Ji Lu's wrists and put them on for him.

The rubber feels cold against the skin, and the deer shrank his hands, a little dazed.

Han Shuo lowered his head and carefully put the gloves on for him, obediently, then raised his head and smiled, "Brother Lu, didn't you say that cloth gloves would be insensitive? I went to buy nitrile gloves. This is very close to the skin, not too heavy, and very wearable."

Ji Lu looked at the gloves on his hands and unconsciously bent his fingers, a little surprised.

He really didn't expect that Han Shuo would write down what he said casually, and even try to help him solve it.

"This is for medical use." Han Shuo wiped his hands with paper and helped him put on another one. "Doctors sometimes use this for surgery, and it should have good barrier properties..."

Hearing this, Jilu suddenly trembled, his lips turned pale for a moment, he struggled to twitch his hands, hurriedly tore off the gloves, threw them aside, and took a few steps back, "I don't want that."

He remembered that when Duan Congzhen was doing experiments, he also wore such gloves on his hands, full of liquid medicine, or the blood of experimental animals, or alcohol, or something else.

Maybe it's because he wears too many gloves. Duan Congzhen's hands also have a cold smell of alcohol, mixed with the unique material smell of nitrile hands, which can be distinguished by a deer.

He used to think that this smell was very special, because then he could be sure that Duan Congzhen was by his side, but now, it only became the trigger to trigger his nightmare.

Han Shuo was also taken aback by him, and looked at him blankly, "What's wrong?"

Ji Lu lowered his head, didn't look at him, waved his hands hastily, his face was stiff, his breathing was somewhat disordered, he turned and went into the shop.

Standing in front of the sink, I soaped it carefully three or four times, and washed off the slight smell of styrene-butadiene on my hands before I felt at ease.

so horrible.

Just this kind of smell with little connection can bring him back to those dark days, like a hand stretched out from the abyss, holding him tightly and dragging him down.

Then drag him back to that bed, in that small dark room, tie him up, and inject him with unknown medicine.

When he came out, Han Shuo hadn't left yet. He was sitting on the small bench. Seeing him coming, he stood up hesitantly.

"Brother Lu, what happened just now? Is there something I did wrong or...?"

Hearing this, Ji Lu was taken aback for a moment, and suddenly he could hear some concern in his polite tone.

He himself said this before, but unlike Han Shuo, he said to Duan Congzhen, "Brother Duan, did I do something wrong?"

With a humble flattery, he really wants to know what he did wrong to make Duan Congzhen so angry, he will change it, really will.

But in fact, Duan Congzhen might not be angry, he just wanted to see him unhappy, even if he followed the man's wishes in everything, Duan Congzhen would find trouble for nothing.

But Han Shuo's tone was not humble, just caring, he is a kind person, maybe he treats everyone the same, but this is indeed the first time Jilu has been treated friendly.

"No, it's not your problem. I... am allergic to this material." Jilu sighed, "Thank you for thinking about it for me."

"Really?" Han Shuo asked uncertainly.

"Yeah." The deer nodded.

"Is it serious?" Han Shuo frowned and looked at him, "You don't look very well."

"It's okay." Ji Lu wiped his face, "Just, little allergies, just forgot."

"Really okay?"

"real."

Han Shuo looked at him for a while, then straightened his clothes, "Then I'll go first, I'm just giving you this."

"Thank you." Ji Lu forced a smile, "I'm sorry to trouble you."

Only then did Han Shuo shake his head slightly, "No trouble."

That is to say, the deer sat down on the bench again and picked up the bouquet.Some time ago, I heard that there was an organized meeting in the auditorium, and Han Shuo had to send some flower baskets to him.

After answering the phone, Han Shuo turned around and walked out, reminding him, "Brother Lu, remember to wash your hands frequently, don't forget."

"Yes. I remember." Ji Lu responded.

Looking at the man's back, Jilu lowered his head and vaguely heard Han Shuo's deep and gentle voice.

"Don't cry, talk slowly if you have something to do...it's okay, I'll go find you in a while, okay? Where are you..."

Looking up, Ji Lu pursed his lips and sighed lowly.

The author says:

*It's a line I saw in "Spider-Man 2: Far From Home".