please let go

At the end of November, the last high school examination was ushered in. The content of this examination was all the main subjects, and the students of arts and sciences did not have to whisper to each other.

When Jiang Chen saw Shen Xinran again, the two greeted each other with a nod and a smile.

Before the teacher entered the examination room, Shen Xinran turned around and said, "Jiang Chen, thank you last time! I got an A."

"Small things."

"What is the relationship between you and that...?"

Rumors were raging, and Jiang Chen knew that she was talking about He Chuan, "Everyone thinks we are in whatever relationship—"

Now he has managed to calm down, not denying or admitting may be the best way, as to whether it is a friend or a lover, I will leave it to everyone to guess.

Shen Xinran: "I think you are a couple."

"Why do you say that?"

"After the exam last time, I saw him watching you from the balcony." Shen Xinran winked and emphasized, "He's smiling~"

Jiang Chen couldn't help laughing: "Is that so—"

The invigilator entered the examination room, and Shen Xinran turned her back.

She is in the first class of science, so there is no need to cheat at all in foreign language and mathematics.

The poor students in the classroom are different. They use all kinds of methods such as typing passwords, passing cheat sheets, and sending text messages.The teacher thought it was the last exam, and the invigilation was not as strict as before.

When the last exam was over the next morning, Shen Xinran stood at the door of the classroom and bid farewell to Jiang Chen, and glanced upstairs, "Look at you, he is standing on the balcony looking at you again."

Jiang Chen didn't turn his head to look at the second floor, but smiled lightly and said, "Let him see."

Shen Xinran tilted her head with a sweet smile, "Our class Chenchen must be heartbroken."

"Chenchen?"

"After the last exam, she fell in love with He Chuan at first sight, and even announced the one with the white wall."

It seems that there is such a thing.

Jiang Chen laughed dumbfounded: "That's a pity."

Shen Xinran glanced upstairs again, then turned her gaze away and said to Jiang Chen, "I wish you a long time!"

"must."

When Jiang Chen went up the stairs, He Chuan was still standing at the stairs waiting for him.

After half a year, that casual energy remained the same, he put his hands on the stage, looked through the crowd, and fell on Jiang Chen alone.

In the south in November, the weather was so gloomy that the sun could not be seen all day long, but Jiang Chen felt a beam of light falling on him.

As soon as he approached, he heard He Chuan talking nonsense: "The old lover reminiscing about the old days?"

"Ah."

"What did you say?"

Jiang Chen teased him: "You've already talked about old lovers reminiscing about the past, what else can you say?"

"Oh." He Chuan gave Jiang Chen a look.

Dangerous...

Jiang Chen hurriedly changed the subject, "There is a monthly exam after the general exam. After the two monthly exams, it's the final exam. It's really annoying."

"Oh."

"How is your book reading? I see that you haven't studied much recently."

"Oh."

"..." Jiang Chen held his forehead, "Go back and coax you."

"it is good."

In the evening, the two left their self-study class and walked towards the dormitory. Just after leaving the entrance of the teaching building, they ran into Shen Xinran by accident.

Shen Xinran first quietly walked to Jiang Chen's side, and only after Jiang Chen noticed her did she smile: "Hi, Jiang Chen."

"What a coincidence, I didn't meet you once when I went downstairs, didn't I?"

"Ah, I used to stay in the classroom to study for a while after class. Today I'm a little dizzy, so I'll go back to the dormitory first." Shen Xinran glanced at He Chuan, and asked secretly on tiptoe, "Why is his face so stinky..."

Shen Xinran is not tall, so Jiang Chen naturally bent over and answered her in a low voice: "He's jealous."

"Ah~" Shen Xinran's eyes lit up, her face full of gossip: "Who made him jealous?"

"you."

"Huh?" Shen Xinran went to look at He Chuan again, and happened to meet the eyes of the complaining woman, "I'm going back to the dormitory first, bye bye bye bye!" She waved her hand and left quickly.

"You scared her." Jiang Chen elbowed He Chuan.

He Chuan didn't say anything, walked back to the dormitory and closed the door, "What are you talking about?"

"Tsk, she knows we are a couple. She stood at the door of the classroom wishing us a long time, and told me that you have been standing on the balcony staring at me. Just now I asked why you looked so bad, and I said you were jealous." Jiang Chen saw He Chuan's bitter face just wanted to laugh.

"Speak as you speak, so close? Your mouth is going to stick to your face."

Jiang Chen took the initiative to kiss his face, "I'll stick with you, don't be jealous."

"I'm not jealous."

"Tsk."

Still can't change the stubborn problem.

The relationship between the two has been good since they fell in love, and they wouldn't get into an unpleasant fight because of one Shen Xinran. They usually fight in small ways, but they quarreled because of the monthly exam results at the end of the month.

Jiang Chen's grades are usually in the top three. Although his grades have not yet reached the ideal university, he still has half a year to improve. He Chuan's grades are not optimistic. According to his current state, it is difficult to take a single exam. .

"He Chuan, let's talk about the grades."

"Do not."

"Don't learn for me, learn for yourself, your score is really bad!"

"I don't want to study anymore."

"Can you say that again."

"Jiang Chen, leave me alone, you are still a little short of your ideal university, right? Accompanying me every day to memorize words, formulas, and knowledge points that you have memorized is a waste of your time." He Chuan After a pause, "I'll just take the second exam."

"I can equivalent to review it again!"

"Knowledge that has been memorized, no matter how many times you read it, it will still be the same."

"Are you so satisfied? You still have half a year, maybe we can still be admitted to the same university..."

"Jiang Chen, you should be very aware of the distance between us. Not everyone is a dark horse. How long have you worked hard? How long have I studied? Don't keep thinking about pulling me to the same height as you."

When it comes to learning, Jiang Chen knows better than He Chuan. He doesn't have learning talent so he works hard, but He Chuan has it. He Chuan has a quick memory and strong comprehension ability. As long as he is serious, he can improve a few points without any problem.

"If it were you, the [-]-day sprint would definitely beat my three-year cold window." Jiang Chen went to pull him, "How do you know if you don't try? Don't rush to deny yourself."

"When did you change your nosy habit?" He Chuan pulled his hand off his sleeve.

"Okay, fine. I don't care. Do whatever you like." Jiang Chen continued to write the question with his head down.

He got angry, and when He Chuan called his name, he didn't respond until the lights in the dormitory were turned off, and then he said sullenly: "He Chuan, I don't want long-distance relationships, I think you have more choices, so there is always someone Options can come closer to me.”

"I know, but I really don't like reading, don't force me."

"He Chuan, it's only half a year, you stick to it for another half year, okay?" He didn't get any answer.

On the surface it is about learning, but in fact it involves their future.

Jiang Chen was afraid, how many loves in his youth could really come together, he thought that He Chuan could enter a good school with him, but He Chuan's attitude made him have to think again, whether they have a future or not.

Shen Chong was the first to notice the cold war between the two, and asked him after the physical education class: "What's the matter with you?"

"It's nothing." Jiang Chen just thought of He Chuan and became irritable. Now He Chuan seems to be against him on purpose. He doesn't go to morning exercises. He starts to sleep again after class. He doesn't do his homework. It's like going back to before liberation overnight.

"Did you two quarrel? Or keep your distance because of those rumors."

In Shen Chong's eyes, they were either lovers, or ordinary friends who were bound together by everyone.

Shen Chong continued to persuade: "Don't worry about those rumors! Brotherhood cannot be destroyed by these nonsense!"

"There was a quarrel, he doesn't study, he doesn't want to take a test."

"Uh... To be honest, He Chuan has changed a lot after being your roommate, but he is not someone who can calm down and study, so don't force others to make things difficult for you. Just do your own study well, and leave him alone. .”

The more Shen Chong said, the more uncomfortable Jiang Chen felt, as if deliberately emphasizing that he and He Chuan had different ideas, and the two were destined not to walk on the same road.

It's not easy to be together, and I'm afraid that the physical distance will bring a psychological distance. What makes him feel insecure the most is that He Chuan seems to have never considered these things, and never planned him into the future.

This time, the two sides refused to give in to each other, and were waiting for the other party to soften their mouths.

After Jiang Chen made sure that the power bank and desk lamp had enough power, he planned to go home for three days to calm each other down. After evening self-study, he said to He Chuan, "I'm going home."

He really looked forward to He Chuan's reaction, if he said something like "Do you dare to go home and try", maybe he wouldn't leave.

He Chuan just said "um" expressionlessly, as if Jiang Chen's whereabouts had nothing to do with him, and walked towards the dormitory without hesitation.

Looking at the decisive back, Jiang Chen was so angry that he cursed.

"Still leaving?" Zhou Haoxiang rushed out from behind, "Do you think He Chuan looks like Wangfushi?"

Jiang Chen forced a smile, and patted Zhou Haoxiang on the back, "Look at the hammer, I'll go home and stay for a few days."

"Oh."

The pass school student card is still there, so it is not difficult for him to leave the school.

The door opened, and Tang Miao was lying on the sofa and watching short videos, put down her phone and asked, "Why are you back? Are you not on campus?"

Jiang Chen said sullenly, "Come back and stay for a few days."

Tang Miao asked, "What's the matter?"

"fine."

Tang Miao hugged him, "Chenchen, don't keep things in your heart, tell me!"

"It's really okay." Jiang Chen couldn't hide what happened, all emotions were written on his face, and he heard his mother still asking: "Did you do something wrong? I promise I won't blame you."

"No... I just had some conflicts with my classmates..."

"He Chuan?"

"Well, I don't think he's serious about studying, and I want him to get into a good university, but...he has a bad attitude towards studying, so..." The more Jiang Chen talked, the more he seemed to be nosy, afraid that his mother would see the clue, so he just shut up. Detailed.

"Ah—" Tang Miao looked clear.

Jiang Chen was dragged to sit on the sofa, thinking that his mother would persuade him like Shen Chong, but she didn't, instead she said: "Then you have to educate him well——"

"Uh-huh?"

"Maybe his future will change a lot because of you. That kid looks quite sensible. You are his friend, so you won't tear yourself apart because of studying, right? If you help him, he will definitely be very grateful in the future." your."

Jiang Chen lowered his head, pinching his cuff fingers and rubbing them back and forth.

It's good to be friends, and seeing you again in ten years is an old friend, but - lovers can't.

"I don't want him to thank me..."

"I know that you help others without expecting anything in return. He must have lost confidence and didn't want to learn because of his unsatisfactory grades. You can help him find ways to learn."

"Hmm..." He did have a problem too. He had been forcing He Chuan to study, and whenever he saw a low score in a subject, he would take that subject. It seemed that he had never considered He Chuan's mood.

"Is it because of him that you came home today?"

"Hmm..." Jiang Chen buried his head and didn't dare to look at his mother. He suddenly felt that he was a little childish. He wouldn't run home after arguing with his boyfriend.

Like a very angry daughter-in-law returning to her natal home...

Tang Miao patted him on the shoulder and joked with a smile: "How old are you? Why are you still being so awkward! When you encounter problems, don't run away and find a way to solve them in time." She patted Jiang Chen's back again , "You wear very little, it's almost December, isn't it cold? Don't catch a cold! Bring a few more thick clothes to school?"

"Need not."

After being questioned by his mother about a lot of trivial matters, Jiang Chen went back to his room to sleep.

The first night he lay down at home, he didn't sleep well. He picked up his phone many times to send He Chuan a message, but he held back the urge.

Just like my mother said, cold war is never the best way to solve problems, he should have a good talk with He Chuan face to face.

He Chuan still slept in class during the day, but the teacher of the department punished him to stand at the back of the classroom.As soon as the morning class ended, everyone rushed to the cafeteria impatiently. He didn't eat lunch, and stayed on the desk in the classroom to continue sleeping.

Jiang Chen went to the cafeteria to pack the food, stepped into the silent classroom again, and walked quietly to He Chuan's desk, looking at the people lying on the desk, he felt a sense of powerlessness for the first time, the people in front of him couldn't beat and scold him No, when I frowned a little, I instinctively coaxed him.

The wind outside the window kept rushing into the classroom, Jiang Chen closed all the windows and doors, walked back and patted the person awake, "Eat."

He Chuan raised his head without saying a word, then went to undo the lid of the lunch box and started eating.

During the process, the two of them didn't exchange a word of extraneous words, and they were as calm as if there had never been any conflicts.

"Is there nothing you want to say?" Jiang Chen leaned against the podium and looked at him. He didn't dare to look at this face more often in class. He just missed this person so much that he didn't go to bed all day.

He Chuan's eyes were dark and his face was a bit ugly. Even standing at the back door of the classroom this morning, he looked drowsy.

It turned out that Jiang Chen wasn't the only one who didn't sleep well.

He Chuan still said heartlessly, "No."

Jiang Chen withdrew his gaze and sat back in his seat, since he couldn't sleep and continued to review anyway.

The two stalemate until the end of self-study in the evening. Jiang Chen followed He Chuan back to the dormitory. Before he could speak, he saw He Chuan's yin and yang.

"Go on to your house."

"..." Jiang Chen closed the dormitory door, "He Chuan, I still stick to my idea. If you feel tired, you can tell me, we will adjust the method, and your score will be counted according to your score, but I hope you don't Just give up now, if it really doesn’t work, I’ll fill out a volunteer and get closer to you.”

He Chuan unexpectedly said: "You want to give up the university you like?"

Jiang Chen helplessly lowered his head and smiled wryly, thinking: Is it possible that I should give up the person I like?

"Jiang Chen, you don't have to do this. We are not the same way, I..."

Jiang Chen interrupted him, "What did you say?"

"I say…"

Jiang Chen rushed up and covered his mouth with his hands, and said coldly, "If you can't say something nice, just shut up."

Those words played in his mind, making people upset, "If you really think so, why are you still with me? You fucking, you either study hard and stay with me well. Or... let's break up early It's good to break..."

He tried his best to restrain his emotions, resting his forehead on He Chuan's shoulder, "He Chuan, is there anyone like you? You like this..." He still couldn't help but choked up: "I can't see the future."

He Chuan grabbed his wrist and moved away, "Jiang Chen, you don't understand my past, and my image may not be one ten thousandth of the me in your heart. What you can't see is the future."

"Is the past that important?" Jiang Chen rubbed against his shoulder again, "The past is all over, can you think about us, our future."

"Can I get through?" He Chuan: "You can get through, but I can't—"

"What can't be done?" Jiang Chen raised his head and saw He Chuan wryly smiled, and felt uncomfortable. He Chuan didn't fully open his heart to him, and he didn't fully understand He Chuan, so he asked again: "Tell me, what can't be done?"

He Chuan pushed him away, unzipped his school uniform jacket, took off his top, and stood naked in front of him.

A scar of nearly ten centimeters across his chest was extremely ugly under the white and tender skin. It was obvious that a sharp weapon had penetrated deep into the flesh, and fresh blood could be seen along the growing new flesh. Every inch of the scar was Shocking.

"How did you do it?" Jiang Chen stepped forward and touched the scar with his fingers. The wound had already healed, but he was still careful in touching, for fear that the pain from the past would continue.

He Chuan didn't speak, and grabbed his hand to prevent him from touching the scar, "It's ugly, right? It's the same as my past."

"Then forget about it."

"Can you forget the things that caused you pain?" He Chuan paused again, "Oh, you seem to be able to."

"I can't delete the memory, how can I forget it? But you don't have to think about it." Jiang Chen has been obsessed with the matter of the note until now, and clearly understands that it is impossible to let it go in this life, but in order to keep what Chuan, he can pretend to forget.

Even if they are called stupid, people will always deceive themselves for love.

"The past... I can't forget it either." He Chuan touched Jiang Chen's cheek as gently as if touching a fragile object.

"It doesn't matter if we can't forget it. We learn history to remember, but at the same time, isn't history reminding us to take the road to the future?" Jiang Chen leaned over and kissed gently along the scar from left to right, "Wabi Have you heard of Ji?"

"No."

Jiang Chen's chin touched He Chuan's sensitive parts. If He Chuan hadn't supported the table with his hands, he might have slipped and fell to the ground as soon as his legs gave way.

"Venus with a broken arm is still beautiful..." Jiang Chen solemnly pressed his lips on the hollow in the middle of his chest, wanting to kiss He Chuan's soul through his flesh and blood, and then raised his head to meet those eyes, "You too .”

The author has something to say:

You don't have to be so talkative