kiss Me

Thanks to someone's jealousy, they didn't watch much of the two-hour movie, and because they missed the beginning, they didn't understand what the so-called "paradox of love" refers to until the end.

It can be regarded as a cliché topic, about whether meeting each other a few years earlier will make the time of falling in love longer, or will miss the possibility of falling in love because of this.

It was approaching midnight, and it was a short-term idea during a long holiday. There were very few trains to choose from. They decided not to take the high-speed rail, bought two train sleepers, and decided to make do with the night on the train—there were only the two of them in the compartment. In a sense, there is a bit of secret romance.

Especially when the topic of discussion involves "love" and the night scene outside the window flies by, it gives more concrete meaning to the abstract topic.

Lin Wu got enough sleep during the day, but at night he had the energy to chat with his brother, saying that the ending of the movie seemed absurd to him. If he met five years earlier, he would miss each other because he chose someone else. After five years, he would go on a blind date and partner The end of life is not a Happy Ending either.

"But everyone wants different things. For those who value bread more than love, this may be good," he just lay on his back on the pillow, spreading his arms wildly, and the passing of the window Broken light fell into his eyes, flickering on and off, "But I still value love more—brother, no matter what stage of my life I meet you, I will still fall in love with you without hesitation."

The topic jumped a bit quickly, but Qin Shu didn't care about the upside-down logic in his words, but raised his eyebrows slightly, and objected to one of the words: "No hesitation?"

The little fox laughed lightly, shook his head so that the obstructive bangs slipped aside, and stretched out his hand to hook his sleeve: "Or go through fire and water...? Besides, I have nothing to pursue, you are the morality for me not to look back—— Is it too nasty to explain this way?"

The neckline slid down with his movements, completely revealing the large hickey that even Qin Shu felt childish when he saw it.The instigator's eyes darkened, and he lowered his collar to help him straighten his collar, and said softly, "It's not nasty."

"Brother," Lin Wu looked up at the flying sky outside the window, but focused on the moon that always accompanied him, and teased jokingly, "If you were in the past, at this time you would say, 'I still have to pursue something, and I can't put a certain "Specific people as morals" and other big principles...why don't you talk about it today?"

They don't hide their extreme possessiveness, and they don't even make excuses for self-deception, as if they are really in a relationship, and each other accepts this fact.

——But who said no, they have indeed performed love thousands of times, under the excuses of true and false, when they wake up from a dream.

When he asked this sentence, he actually had an irrational impulse for a moment. He wanted to tell Qin Shu frankly all the consequences he could accept, and he didn't mind living in extremes and darkness all his life, being hunted, controlled or It's collusion, as long as this person is him, he can accept it.

But in the end, he still held back. With his brother's character, it was obviously impossible to agree, and he would not be willing to use a fake warm mask to perfuse him for the rest of his life, or put him in a dangerous situation where he might be hurt by his sweetheart at any time.

What's more, what they lack now is not actually a "I like you, let's really be together" process.

Qin Shu knew him so well that he could tell from every punctuation mark whether he was really joking or not. Hearing this, he sat down beside the bed, and gently smoothed his messy hair, letting the child's pretty eyes show, and said: "It's not a child who really needs to be taught. You understand it yourself, so I won't say more about it, brother."

Lin Wu probably studied more seriously recently than at any stage in the previous 19 years, and he didn't just study blindly as he did in the past, but rather like to settle down as soon as he came, and simply read the best after studying this major—he Not sure if such abnormal concentration is a good thing, but I know that the reason behind the abnormality cannot be separated from myself.

Lin Wu used to be very free, always indifferent to everything, never wanting a specific result.

But now he has become that "specific result".

"Xiao Wu," he looked into the boy's clear eyes, and added in his usual gentle and rational way, "I still feel that if one day you can find a more suitable destination for yourself like in the movie, It is the optimal solution in theory. For a person like me, whether I can be chosen by you or like you like a normal person, it is a gift that should not be expected. Once I had the opportunity to obtain it in the past, I would I'm already very satisfied. If that day really comes, you don't have to worry about me...My brother always believes that the most important thing is that you can be truly happy."

He has probably typed many times before he could speak so smoothly and smoothly, like a robot performing its established duties.

But robots also have flaws, and the flaw lies in their sincerity.

Lin Wu was silent for a few seconds, and didn't say "Only you can make me truly happy", which was sincere to him, but Qin Shu wouldn't trust it. He just sat up, turned on the light, and pulled down his loose collar. , so that the mottled hickey near the collarbone is clearly exposed and reflected in the eyes of the perpetrator.

"But, brother," the little fox leaned over to hug him, and put it against his ear to expose the flaws, but his tone was innocent, "You are obviously jealous, and you don't even mind if I say a few more words to others, and you have been trying Love me in a normal way—it’s not that grandiose, you can’t turn back, right?”

There is no turning back, and there is no redemption.

The pale light from the train compartment fell on Qin Shu's face, outlining his already distinct outline even more coldly, like an artificial man carved from jade—the artificial man accepted his embrace, and looked down at him after he backed away. He seemed to be looking for an explanation.

But many things cannot be explained in a few words. He is contradictory from beginning to end, and he can't even convince himself, let alone persuade others.

Just like the so-called "I'm very satisfied" is just a disguise for his limited ability, he has also begun to tentatively cross the line, actively or passively revealing his nature, jealousy, companionship, and intimate contact, all of which are evidence of flaws ——He is just a duplicity liar. He has clearly accepted the fact that he wants to spend the rest of his life with the other party in his heart. He wants to give the result Lin Wu wants with both hands. Use some high-sounding excuses to excuse, repeatedly evading the established facts.

——"But there is still a lifetime."

"It's just the theoretical optimal solution," he finally gave in, looking into the boy's clear eyes, and brought up this topic for the first time, "In this matter, I don't expect the optimal solution to happen. "

Lin Wu was slightly stunned, and took two seconds to understand what he meant, and then threw himself into his arms like a brawler, forcibly interrupting this boring conversation that was as strict as a negotiation, and raised his head to kiss him while propping up his thigh. , and said vaguely: "Brother Xiao Su, have you forgotten the love letter I wrote to you before, saying that you are my best solution-whether you forgot or pretended to be stupid, and be honest."

Qin Shu was a little itchy from his kitten-like kissing method, but couldn't bear to push it away, so he had to hold back a smile and answer seriously: "When did I write it, why don't I remember..."

For the first time, he rejoiced that the train was not as fast as the high-speed rail, allowing them to have such a night with nothing to do, chatting from the paradox of love to the occurrence of the so-called optimal solution-this seems to be not rigorous enough, and he was lucky that he happened to see The tweet from the official account, suggesting a short trip, happened to watch that movie before leaving...

Such a "meeting by fate", if we continue to pursue it, I am afraid that it will start from the time when the two parents got along well.

Lin Wu wrestled with him to count the year when the love letter was written, and put on a look of trying to get to the bottom of it, counting what he saw, and quickly attracted his attention.

It is a sea.

The narrow window is filled with the sky and the sea of ​​the same color, just like a train entering the universe, the galaxy is sparkling, silent——then a strange idea fell into Qin Shu's mind, it turned out that when the other party saw the sea in his eyes, It really creates the illusion that time has stopped and there are only the two of them left in the world.

"Speaking of which, about the paradox of love," Lin Wu came back to his senses and had forgotten about the love letter, so he sat on his lap and teased him solemnly, "Brother, I suddenly feel that you are like the heroine in the movie." , and always feel that the timing is not perfect, but you see, he thought it was too late and everything was not the best, so he decided to go back to the past and meet each other ten years earlier, and in the end, each of them found someone else—if I was caught by you Speaking of which, if you are really with someone else one day, you will regret it like the protagonist after recovering your memory, and you will die with hatred in the end..."

Strange to say, it was obviously the same thing. When Qin Shu said it himself, he didn't think it was a big deal, but when he heard Lin Wu say it, he felt it was particularly harsh, as if he had imagined the ending of regret in the future. After a long silence, he said: "In the past, I I feel that the most regrettable thing is being too self-confident and hurting the cherished people for one's own selfish desires, and I still think so...but maybe it is wrong to overcorrect."

The sea outside the window had already passed, but when he looked into Lin Wu's eyes, he felt in a daze that this sea was endless, leaving him with the possibility that he could not see the bottom line clearly.

"Xiao Wu, if..." He lowered his gaze under the other party's probing gaze, as if he had made up his mind, he paused before continuing, "If you wait until three months later, no, now it's two months and one day later If I still can't understand, perceive and express love correctly at that time, can I apply for an appropriate extension of the time limit?"