follow my heart

Meng Buqing thought for a moment and asked, "If you compromise, can you convince yourself?"

Qin Zijin glanced at her after hearing the words, and decided to let Meng Buqing sing the red face and play the bad face, "There is no way to answer this question. Because she doesn't know how many things need to be compromised after returning home."

"..."

Zhao Chunru was silent.

After a while she said: "If I don't go back like this, my mother's life will not be easy. My father only plays cards and drinks, and blames my mother."

Meng Buqing didn't know how to answer.She is too far away from this kind of problem. If Ms. Xiao Anqiao's life is not good, she will just quickly abandon her original husband and children and find another way out.

Zhao Chunru murmured: "I don't want to go back either, but my mother only gave birth to me, a daughter... They worked so hard to support my education, and I really owe them..."

Qin Zijin couldn't understand it.

In this world, some parents have been mediocre all their lives, gave birth to children in a muddle, and dedicated themselves to self-interest. In fact, they have not provided any great high-quality resources for their children.

In the end, these payments, all plus interest, must be kidnapped to the child. Once they feel that they are about to lose control of the child, they will become creditors and tighten the reins desperately.

The child really felt that he owed his parents, so he accepted his fate obediently.

Qin Zijin shortened the words in his heart a lot, and said calmly: "You can give them money, and then hire some relatives who are close to take care of them, this is within the scope of your obligations."

Meng Buqing's eyebrows twitched when he heard this.

Looking up at Qin Zijin's serious face, he thought of what Ji Wan did before.She agreed unconditionally: "I think it should be the same."

"However, people in my hometown are full of bad-mouthed people... They told my parents that I earn so much money outside by myself and refuse to get married. I am acting as a mistress for the boss."

"Then you can take your parents over and change to a better environment," Qin Zijin said, "You have the ability."

Zhao Chunru frowned, showing a helpless and frustrated expression.

"What ability do I have? The housing price here is ten times that of my hometown. Since I was a child, I was told that if I study, I will get ahead in the future, but what ability do I have to get ahead?"

The air fell silent.

Meng Buqing and Qin Zijin looked at each other.Both of them are from this city, and their family's economic conditions are relatively good, and they have never worried about the house.

Saying "it doesn't matter" will only be like standing and talking without back pain.

Qin Zijin sighed softly, and said softly, so he looked very gentle: "If you are not purely gay, or if you can be a little stupid, it may indeed be the right choice to go back to your hometown and stay with your parents. Find a well-educated person to marry, there is no love You can also manage family relationships and share the risks of life.”

"But you are smart and sensitive. If you go back for your parents, you will stay in an environment where you will always have to pretend to be yourself." Qin Zijin said calmly, "You will not be happy for the rest of your life."

Zhao Chunru pursed her lips and said nothing.

"Or do you think this kind of sacrifice is noble? For the false face of your parents, you are willing to sacrifice your true happiness, will this make your dedication personality complete?"

Meng Buqing felt that although Qin Zijin's tone was gentle, his words were harsh.

Still wondering if it's an illusion.

In the next second, there was no doubt at all.

Not an illusion.

Qin Zijin said very bluntly: "Your parents are idiots. I don't need to tell you, you can see through this kind of stalking threatened with death, it's just a way to force you, it's a very low-level, immoral way that doesn't stand on the table. "

Meng Buqing paid attention to Zhao Chunru's expression, ready to say something to smooth things over at any time.

Zhao Chunru's long eyelashes drooped, and he put his hands on his lap, staring blankly at the grain of the wooden table.

It was as if he didn't listen to her very much.

Qin Zijin frowned, thought for a while, and said, "Your parents are just suspicious now, and the disturbance is already so big. Do you think they will accept anything in the future, even if it is just the possibility of you not getting married?"

Zhao Chunru shook his head slowly.

"You see, when a thief is caught, the sentence is usually a few months, and for a felony robbery, the sentence is three years, and the criminal is only ten years in prison, but in the eyes of people like your parents, no matter whether you are petty theft or robbery... , as long as the prison term expires and you are innocent, you can be an upright person. Homosexuality is a death sentence with a suspended sentence, and it is the kind of existence that is best taken away and shot if you don’t correct yourself.”

Zhao Chunru kept his eyes down.

Qin Zijin asked: "Do you really think you did something wrong? Do you deserve to be treated like this?"

In the afternoon, abundant light comes in from the balcony, illuminating the entire small apartment.Meng Buqing stuffed the phone back into his pocket, looked at Qin Zijin, and realized that she was not afraid of being resentful and trying to convince others.

She thought about it, and asked in a low voice in the warm light, "Qin Zijin, if your parents can't accept it, aren't you afraid of making them suffer because of your behavior?"

"It doesn't matter if you can't accept it. I will reason with them. Not once, twice, or two years a year, we can find a way to coexist peacefully." Qin Zijin said, "But if they are feudal and narrow-minded, they still want to control I, I will stay away from them and cut off all ties."

Zhao Chunru raised her eyes slightly, Meng Buqing saw this, helped her and continued to ask: "Then you are not afraid that their old age will suffer because of you?"

Qin Zijin sneered, and said, "It's none of my business that they suffer because of their ignorance."

"..."

Zhao Chunru, who had been listening all the time, finally spoke and asked, "If you compromised a little, they wouldn't be in pain. They could have lived a foolish but happy life."

"If you want to be ignorant and happy, you depend on luck. Who makes them unlucky," Qin Zijin curled his lips, "I'm not a god, so I can't do anything."

The air was quiet again.

Meng Buqing's hand in his pocket vibrated, and when he took it out to see the news, his eyes lit up.Just now I told Ji Wan the general situation, and wanted to ask her how to enlighten her.

Ji Wan sent a few messages.

Meng Buqing put the mobile phone on the table and said to Zhao Chunru: "Maybe the life experience of the two of us is not enough for you to trust, so I found a big sister who has experienced the same difficulties as you."

A few simple words on the phone made Meng Buqing show the phone to the girl directly.

Followed by long paragraphs of text.

[What is considered to be a catastrophic event now, in fact, in a few years, it is actually just sand and gravel thrown up by walking on the road.Housing prices here are indeed too high, but not all inclusive big city housing prices are so high. ]

[Your family is not good, but you are an adult and have already achieved achievements beyond your parents, which is enough to show your own ability.No one can escort me to this day. I must have experienced countless efforts, struggles, and compromises since I was a child, and finally I was able to find a correct answer for myself.This process is very difficult, but you actually have a way every time. ]

[The hesitation now is because I want to try my best to find a way that can take care of both ends, right?Little girl, you are not a saint, you just take the path that you think is most right.This choice is your own decision, and you will not regret it in the future. ]

Zhao Chunru read it carefully, tears flickered in his eyes.

After a while, I asked: "Can I really not regret it? Will she not suspect that she has done something wrong in the future? What is she relying on to never regret or doubt herself?"

Meng Buqing typed quickly and sent it.

There will be a reply soon.

I thought she would tell Zhao Chunru in a gentle tone that sometimes time would make the best arrangements for her, and then use herself as an example.

Who knows, Ji Wan only replied with one sentence:

[Dao Ming without doubt, Virtue without fear. ]

When Zhao Chunru was looking at it, Qin Zijin beside her also looked at it, and couldn't help but muttered over and over again: "Dao Ming has no doubts, Virtue has no fear."

She was a little surprised, her eyes flashed with emotion, and then announced in a very serious tone: "This big sister is my role model in life."

Zhao Chunru burst out laughing suddenly when she heard the words, sniffed her nose, and yelled at her mixed with sobs: "She told me this, don't take it away."

As he spoke, he took out his mobile phone from his pocket and said, "I want to use it as my personal signature."

Seeing this, Meng Buqing breathed a sigh of relief, and said half-jokingly and half-seriously, "What does this sentence mean?"

"..."

"..."

Qin Zijin rolled his eyes unabashedly, "How did you, an illiterate, chase after such a connotative big sister?"

—

Meng Buqing and Qin Zijin stayed at Zhao Chunru's house, chatting and watching movies together, and they didn't go home until evening.She came out of the subway exit and was thinking while walking under the street lamp.

Ji Wan is really amazing, she can judge the situation so accurately just by reading the text description.

Zhao Chunru only said to go home and get married because of various things not going well, feeling tired, and having all kinds of negative thoughts.

She and Qin Zijin really thought that the other party was thinking about it.

Think about something.

Meng Buqing opened the door with the key, and heard the sound of cooking in an iron pan, and at the same time smelled the aroma of the food.She took half a step back in a daze, and looked up at the house number.

Yes, that's right.

Hearing the movement, Ji Wan came out of the kitchen.

She took the steaming dish and put it on the table, "Wash your hands and eat."

"Did you do it?" Asked an obvious idiot question, Meng Buqing added it again, with an unspeakably surprised tone, "Since when did you seriously learn to cook?"

The corners of Ji Wan's lips curled up, but she immediately asked feigned annoyance: "What do you mean by that?"

She grabbed the braid in her tone, "You think I can't learn how to cook."

Meng Buqing was a little stunned, and nodded honestly.

I think people like Ji Wan will never be able to cook.

"I've let you down," Ji Wan said with a deeper smile, pretending to be flat, "I have never really been worse than others in what I can learn by studying."

Meng Buqing asked subconsciously: "What about mathematics?"

"..."

Ji Wan paused and ignored her.

Meng Buqing was still standing at the entrance.

Look at her taking off her apron with her hands behind her back, and she is wearing a comfortable and ordinary light gray home clothes.Such simple and casual clothes, on Ji Wan's body, are not mediocre, on the contrary, there is a warm feeling that can be approached.

The light reflects the beautiful long black hair, and the hair is shrouded in light, which also has a soft meaning.

Meng Buqing looked at her, her heart beating fast.

"What are you doing standing there?" Ji Wan raised her hand and said, "Wash your hands and eat."

Meng Buqing blushed inexplicably, and said in a low voice:

"you are pretty."

After finishing speaking, he leaned over and rubbed into her arms, reaching out and hugging her waist without letting go.Hold tight.

Ji Wan raised the corner of her lower lip, "What's the matter, huh?"

"It's nothing." Meng Buqing couldn't tell.

Just being aware of my insensitivity once again.When I heard Ji Wan talk about the past, although I felt sorry for her hard life, it was still vague.

Seeing Zhao Chunru's appearance today is the only way I can see the tremendous pressure of fighting against reality alone.

Meng Buqing felt uncomfortable silently.

Back then, Ji Wan was even a minor...

Ji Wan seemed to have guessed what she was thinking.

He reached out and stroked the top of her hair, "Don't think too much."

"I know." Meng Buqing responded very well.

I thought, take your time, she will become more mature and considerate day by day.

Just hugging Ji Wan like this, the woman's soft and well-proportioned body seemed to be ironing her soul, and all the chaotic noises quickly calmed down.I feel that the ultimate definition of happiness in the world is this embrace.

Meng Buqing asked: "When can we go out to play, I want to travel, and I want to stay with you all day long."

"What happened suddenly?" Ji Wan stared at her amusedly, "Aren't you..."

She paused, and her slightly accentuated words carried obvious teasing, "Are you busy with your career?"

Why are you still mentioning this? Isn't that just a bad time?

Meng Buqing quickly lowered his head, held her sleeve, and muttered softly, "I'm just joking."

"But I'm going to be busy with a new project recently."

"Oh, then you're busy—"

"Go at the beginning of next month." Ji Wan pinched her face with her hand, and interrupted her with a smile on her face, "This time I will definitely go, even if I have to fire you first."

Meng Buqing: "..."

The author has something to say:

There are still about three chapters left, the main text is over, the writing is a bit slow TT baby forgive me