don't like me

"A little lower."

In the piano room, my teacher ordered in a low voice.

He pays attention to every detail. He strictly controls the arc of my fingertips and the strength of pressing them down. Although he has never been tolerant towards others, in comparison, he is more strict with me.

I know the reason why he treats me so strictly, my teacher loves music, pure love, I can hear from his melody, that fanatical seriousness.

"Did you fall in love recently?" He taught me with his hands, pressing my hand down a little, the notes were still beating, but it didn't stop him from talking to me.

I nodded.

He's a man, much more mature than us boys.Every word he said made sense to me, such as his next paragraph.

"I don't care if you are in a relationship or not, and who you are with. I want you to appear in the piano room every Friday afternoon. Before I walk to the door, I want to hear the sound of notes beating." He and other teachers It's different, but the difference is not much. It's just that they focus on different places. Some people care about my academic performance, and some people care about my sincerity to the piano.

"I know." I affirmed, "Always know what I'm going to do."

"That's good." He let go of his hand, walked away from me, walked to the side of the piano, and asked me, "Have we talked?"

There is a seriousness between his brows.

"Yes." I knew what he meant, and before he gave me another instruction, I completely broke away from his teaching and started to play solo.

The teacher stood next to me and closed his eyes. When he listened to me playing the piano, the expression on his face was very enjoyable. Other students said that the teacher was too strict. I don’t think so. Every time I see him close his eyes and enjoy They all feel very elegant and gentle.

The music in my hand has been adapted countless times by countless people, and the version I am talking about was personally adapted by my teacher. It is more melancholy and lonely than the original song, showing a sense of frustration. After many years, it may still be the same. It will be adapted by other people, but that's a later story. I only know this song, and I like it very much right now.

"A week later, let's talk about a new song," the teacher said, "Changing it with your heart, it's not difficult, the hard part is how to make it more classic."

After the song, I put down my hands and looked up at the person beside the piano.

"Any other requests?"

The teacher looked at me and said, "No, just read it according to your own feeling. It doesn't matter if it's cheerful, as long as it sounds good enough."

"I see." Looking at the keys, I pondered for a while, with notes beating in my mind, but how to combine them into a beautiful piano piece is what I have to do this week.

It is already 07:30 after school.

Yang Xiao had already left the field. He knew that I was going to practice piano on Friday, and the way to dispel it was to play basketball. When I saw him, he was sitting under the basketball hoop and waiting for me. There was no one else on the playground. I walked quickly past.

Yang Xiao looked at his phone, "It's a bit late today."

I helped my schoolbag and said, "Are you in a hurry?"

He took it for me, put his back on his back consciously, touched my head, and said, "To be honest, it's a little bit, can I wait for you in the piano room next time?"

"No." I quickly rejected him.

Yang Xiao laughed and said, "What's the matter? Is there a secret in the piano room?"

I said, "No, it's our teacher. He doesn't like being disturbed by irrelevant people."

"A boyfriend is also an irrelevant person?"

I raised my head, looked at Yang Xiao, and said for a long time, "Forget it."

Tell the teacher, Yang Xiao counts.

The music teacher is different from other teachers. His love for music makes me dare not disturb him casually. We usually listen to his music quietly in music class. Once there is a little noise, or the sound of chairs scratching, etc. , neither can.

Otherwise for this class, the hallway outside is your domain.

He was so strict that the students complained at first, but the teacher has the experience of graduating from a prestigious school and has made some achievements in the society. The school respected his way of teaching, which made the students fearful.

"It's the one from the prestigious school, right?" Yang Xiao had heard that the teacher was very low-key in the school, but there were many people who spread his good and bad news.

I said yes.

"It's so strange," Yang Xiao said, "There are so many students in class, how can I be there?"

"Our classmates are also very afraid of him." I said.

"Are you afraid?" Yang Xiao said.

I was questioned.

At that moment, I was also thinking, am I afraid of the teacher?If you say you are afraid, you are not. I just respect him. I have always respected people who are serious and have love. In my eyes, being able to maintain firm belief and eternal purity in your love is far from ordinary.

"I'm not afraid of him." My voice was so soft that Yang Xiao couldn't believe it.

"Really?"

"Why lie to you?" I said, "I'm not afraid of him."

Yang Xiao couldn't help laughing and said, "What do you say twice? I'm just teasing you."

Yang Xiao went on to say: "Student god like you, no teacher doesn't like it, right?"

I immediately answered: "Yes."

Yang Xiao frowned.

I said: "The physical education teacher is a headache."

Yang Xiao seemed to have been poked at the point of laughter by me, he curled his lips from time to time, smiling happily, I didn't say anything ridiculous.

Yang Xiao said: "If people are all perfect, then they won't be gods? If you can't find any faults, and you really develop morality, intelligence, physique, art and labor in an all-round way, can I still fall in love with you?"

"Could it be that you fell in love with me because I'm not perfect?" Naturally, I didn't mean that, but I've been with him for a long time, and I want to tease him from time to time.

"That's right," Yang Xiao said frankly, "I'm not good enough at all, what's the difference between you being more perfect and me being more rotten?"

"Don't talk, I don't like to hear it." I said angrily.

"be honest……"

"I don't like to hear that, don't talk about it." I was petty and angry.I have never imagined what it would be like to fall in love before, nor did I expect that I could be so unreasonable.

Yang Xiao treated me well, he said yes three times, and said he would never say it again, so I was satisfied and went to have dinner with him.

"I have a ball game this Friday, come and see me." It's not a request, it's a request.

"The end is coming early, when do you start?"

"05:30, ask the teacher for a leave."

"No, he won't agree." I know the music teacher very well, he can't approve my reason, and he will be very mindful about my going to watch my boyfriend's game.

"Then try to be as early as possible." Yang Xiao said, "If you don't make it to this league competition, you won't have a chance."

"No chance to see you play cool?" I tear him apart.

"Yeah, the large-scale cool scene, I suggest you don't miss it," Yang Xiao leaned closer to my ear and said, "Be careful, your boyfriend still has a bit of reputation, just in case..."

"Then let you go." I said, but it made him angry. Yang Xiao said that I was getting more and more difficult. I didn't admit it. He was the one who teased me first. If I called him back once, he would be unhappy. , hugged me and said that I must not ignore him.

How can I ignore him?

It's just a poor mouth, just to get his attention.

I did improve.

It would be great if the story only ends here, if there is no teacher in life, or if there is no Yang Xiao, I don’t know how powerful the combination of these two people is. Sure enough, as long as you care about it, you will be frustrated. What is gained must be lost.

When I have Yang Xiao, it also proves that I may lose it.

When I admire my teacher, it also proves that I may be exposed.

On the day of Yang Xiao's match, I didn't go.

I went to practice the piano as usual, and the teacher was waiting for me, but that day, the teacher drank some wine, I don't know what he took me for, and I don't know what he went through, he was in such a bad mood, and his actions were so frivolous.

He was standing on the side looking at me that day, while I was sitting on the piano bench, and I never noticed the fiery gaze, nor was I startled by his approach. I woke up in a trance when he hugged me from behind. Messy notes made the entire piano room noisy, and a voice that fell on my ear exploded my eardrums: "You were born for me."

I only noticed the teacher's actions and ignored the other person standing in front of the door. Even if it was the first time, Yang Xiao's eyes were not so sinister. How can I describe his gaze accurately?All I know is that the sense of security no longer exists at that moment, and I did nothing, but I looked flustered as if I had been caught.

"Yang Xiao..." I stood up suddenly, and the people behind me became sober because of my sound. The teacher frowned, not because of the presence of others, but because he himself realized what was wrong just now.

He is used to being arrogant, standing on my shoulders, I can only listen to his guidance and teaching forever, I have never and should not hear his apology.

"Is it over? After I'm done, I'll come in." He had already walked in and closed the door behind him.

"I..." I wanted to talk, but he had something more important than mine.

"I thought you had some secrets. I thought you loved the piano very much. I thought teachers and students couldn't have other things. Suddenly, I don't know whether my thoughts are dirty or your actions are dirtier." Low air pressure enveloped the entire piano In the room, I began to fear, the tense atmosphere.

And the look in my boyfriend's eyes.

"A teacher who graduated from a prestigious school, didn't he have a high-end education? Did your wife get fucked or did you get fucked by your teacher?"

"Yang Xiao..." Before I finished speaking, he suddenly raised my chin and said sullenly, "Does it look good? Tender or not? I'm ten years younger than you. How does it feel in the hand? It's soft to hold. Is it not bad to kiss, have you tried it? Without me to help you."

The time when he was the least youthful was at this moment, completely irrational, messed up by the three of us in the pure piano room, and I was even more embarrassed, kissed roughly by Yang Xiao, without love, his eyes were full of love. resentment, my world collapsed.

I was so cowardly, I wanted to cry, and my tears came down instantly.

The moment he let go of me, he didn't seem to want to look at me any more. He left me, carried the piano bench, and walked towards my teacher.

Manic, gloomy, domineering, and resentful, his mood was extremely bad. I knew that even if I stopped him sooner, I couldn't stop the piano bench from hitting the teacher.

There was a lot of blood, I just remembered, the stool was so dirty, no... It was the floor, I forgot, and my eyes were blurred.

"Do you like him?" He's going to jail, will he be in jail? Why isn't he afraid of so much blood?

My body is shaking.

"Say, you like him, don't you?" His voice was a little stern, and the suddenly raised volume entered my ears noisily, "Wen Zhixing, someone got out, and someone said you have an affair. I don't believe it. You tell me, say it yourself, don't lie to me."

Who knows?Who is instigating behind the scenes?Regarding the matter of my admiration for my teacher, no second person, not even my teacher, knew about the immoral emotion that I stifled when it was just sprouted.

Yang Xiao is asking me?But he doesn't need my answer, his eyes are so clear, he knows everything and can see, but he wants to embarrass me, he regards me as an enemy, he hates me, it's strange, why do he hate me?Doesn't he love me?

"His status is equal to mine, maybe higher than mine. Your agreement with him is more important. My game is nothing. Why? Because you have an affair with him."

I was carried by him in his hand, although I was so close, I couldn't feel the warm breath.

"Answer me, why didn't you talk? Did you say you never did? What were you panicking when I hit him?"

"What do you think? Yang Xiao, why do you think I'm panicking?" Self-esteem?I have it too, a lofty heart?I have it too.

"Are you answering me?" Yang Xiao said, "Explain clearly, what are you doing in a sneaky way? Explain clearly, your expressive ability is so good, Chairman Wen."

He looked at me, and he didn't see any caring meaning in his eyes. I was the one who was hugged, and the one who was frightened was me. I didn't do anything wrong, so why dare not say it?

"I haven't." I said, "Never have we been together."

The teacher may be the first person I admire. That immature liking, or maybe it should be said that I have a good impression, is also suppressed by the moral bottom line. , I can't tell.

"So, you really liked him?" Yang Xiao pressed my chin, "Really? Can you explain it this way?"

I grabbed his hand, my voice became cold, "Let go."

After five seconds, he let me go.

Then he laughed, utterly ironic.

I don't coax him, yes, I don't understand, I won't, I don't want to, I didn't do anything, he can't misunderstand me, he can't just dislike me, he can't punish me for other people's actions, he can't Because you don't love me anymore.

However, I was wrong.

These are the things that teenagers care about. In immature relationships, this is the most important thing to express care and liking. What is fairness?What do you have or don't have?What he wants to hear is not this, what he wants to hear at that moment is my concern.

But I was so cold, I said neither humble nor overbearing: "Let go."

Of course he minded, of course he was angry, of course he was sarcastic.

It is his kindness that he does not hit me.

Yang Xiao was not wrong, it was me who was wrong.

It’s because I hold the most ideal state for everything, it’s because I take the relationship too simply, thinking that the two sides can be honest in exchange for understanding, I still don’t understand, Gu Ming is right, I don’t understand, I don’t know how to manage relationships , the first paragraph will fail sooner or later.

Blame myself for being disobedient.

Blame me for blind self-confidence, thinking that if we like each other, we can last for a long time.

Love is a lesson, but I don't want to learn it, and I don't have a chance to learn it.

That night, a lot of things happened, I can't explain at once, and I don't know, I only know that the teacher was the fuse, which ignited this immature emotional dispute in advance, and ended the unpopular relationship in advance.

blame me?Why?I can't have someone to admire?Even if there is, Yang Xiao can't hate me.

He appeared so late, how can you blame him for not being the person I liked the first time?

Blame Yang Xiao?Why?His boyfriend was touched by someone, but he heard rumors about his boyfriend and that person, but his boyfriend really fell in love with him, but Yang Xiao caught him, couldn't he be angry?

No one can blame me, what should I do, I want to hear other people's opinions, I want to ask Gu Ming what to do, but unfortunately, our hearts are higher than the sky.

We are all waiting for an apology from the other.

We were all right, and yet it seemed like we were all wrong.

The author has something to say:

The pace will be very fast, and the memories will only pick up what I think are the more important parts to write, and will not describe in detail every day and every moment of their love. This section is already a story after they have been together for a long time.