prefer silence

Saturday, a sunny day.But overnight, bright yellow winter jasmine flowers suddenly bloomed in the flower bed, the branches were green and fragrant.

Chen Zheng and I passed these cute little flowers when we got up early for our morning jog. Under the spring breeze that was still a little chilly, they swayed their long branches and greeted us with vigor.

At eleven o'clock in the morning, Mom had stewed pig's trotters and soybeans until they were rotten, and they were simmering in a frying pan. This was Yuan Jie's favorite dish.Chen Zheng and I joked with my mother while peeling the shrimp shells to relieve her nervousness.

"Mom, Yuan Jie is a handsome guy. He looks like you."

Mom lifted the lid of the pot, and thick water mist rose from the delicious soup. She stirred it with the back of her shovel, "I look like me in the photos, but he looks more like your grandfather."

"Isn't being like grandpa just like you, you are like grandpa."

Chen Zheng echoed me: "Yes, Mom, Yuan Jie's personality is also like yours."

"Hey, stop teasing me. He didn't grow up by my side. How can he be like me? I'm not that fragile. I slept better than your dad last night. When I got up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, your dad's room He didn't fall asleep." Mom lowered her voice, "Oh, I'm glad he didn't sleep well."

I laughed, "That's fine, Mom, let's not worry, take your time."

In order to prevent my mother from having a psychological gap, I vaccinated my mother early.I told my mother everything about Yuan Jie's attitude towards our family.

I still remember my mother wiping her tears and saying, "What crime do you think I did? Do I owe them the Yuan family? One of the two brothers abducted my son, and the other asked my son to take care of him in the old age. I myself I can’t even give birth to my son. But I can’t blame him. What’s wrong with him? He hasn’t had a few sips of milk from me since he was born. Others raised him. Then I can only blame myself. Blame myself for handing over my son to someone who is not worth entrusting."

"Ding dong ding dong."

The doorbell rang and my heart went up.

Is it Yuan Jie?

"I'll open the door."

I looked through the cat's eyes, and it was Yuan Jie standing outside. He was wearing a red padded jacket with a cautious face.

I opened the door and narrowed my eyes with a smile, "Come in!"

Yuan Jie stepped over the threshold, I put the slippers for him and put them by his feet, "The cartoon slippers I specially bought for you, you are a rabbit and I am a puppy."

He looked down at the fluffy rabbit head on the upper of the slippers, and said in a low voice, "Thank you Yuyuan, it looks great."

Chen Zheng took away all the things in Yuan Jie's hands, and Dad couldn't wait to come over and look at Yuan Jie with excited eyes, "You are Yuan Jie? Come, come, sit on the sofa, let me take a good look at you."

As Dad said, he took Yuan Jie's arm and sat on the sofa with his shoulders. Yuan Jie looked a little uncomfortable, and he said "Hello, Uncle" and didn't speak again.

Dad scanned Yuan Jie up and down with fiery eyes, and then slapped his thigh, "You are a very energetic young man, like your mother, so good, so good."

He choked up when he said "It's so good", put one hand on Yuan Jie's shoulder, and kept patting him, "It's my son! You are my son!"

Seeing this scene of father and son meeting each other, my eyes were either red or red, and it seemed unreasonable. Chen Zheng squeezed my hand tightly.

Yuan Jie was at a loss, looked around, I guessed he was looking for his mother, so he said, "Mom is in the kitchen."

Mom should have heard the movement in the kitchen a long time ago, she was just too timid to come out.

I tentatively asked, "Shall I accompany you to the kitchen?"

Yuan Jie hesitated for a moment and nodded, then turned to his father and said, "Uncle, I'm going to see Auntie, don't be too sad."

"Go and see your mother, she has missed you all these years." Dad propped his head half-covered his eyes, and waved at us.

When we came to the door of the kitchen, Mom was cooking with her back to us, and the range hood was on, buzzing.She didn't look back, "The dishes are not ready yet, let's sit down first."

After Mom spoke, her nasal voice was very heavy. I could tell something was wrong with her voice, so I hurried forward to grab her shovel, "Let me fry it, Mom."

Facing her, I realized that she had been crying silently. I was so distressed that I hugged her, "Mom, your Xiaoheng is back, you should look back quickly."

I half pushed her to go out, Chen Zheng took over the work in the kitchen, Yuan Jie froze at the sliding door, scratching the wall uneasily with one hand.

"Aunt……"

Yuan Jie called softly.

Mom finally couldn't help crying, she stretched out her hand towards Yuan Jie, her voice hoarse, "Is it Xiao Heng?"

I looked at Yuan Jie expectantly, recognize this name, at least for now, recognize this name.Xiaoheng is too heavy for mother.

Yuan Jie lowered his head, wondering what he was thinking.

At this moment, the time flow of every minute and every second seems to be slow and tormented.The low roar of the range hood and the choking sound of the shovel colliding with the wall of the pot make the kitchen very lively.The atmosphere is completely different, sad and silent.

Mom's hand was put down feebly, and in an instant I seemed to see a heart that was so painful that it was rapidly withering.

"Yes, I'm Xiaoheng." Yuan Jie raised his head, tears streaming down his face quietly.

"Xiaoheng! Xiaoheng!" Mom rushed over and hugged Yuan Jie tightly, shouting that name hoarsely, "Xiaoheng! It's mom who is sorry for you! Mom shouldn't have put you in grandma's house, it's all mom's fault! It's all mother's fault!"

"You were supposed to grow up by Mom's side. Mom should have watched you grow up little by little from a baby to the height of a small tree. But you are so tall now, and Mom didn't see you at all! Are you It’s not that you have suffered a lot, you shouldn’t have suffered so much!”

"Blame me, hate me, Xiao Heng..."

I covered my face and sobbed, feeling inexplicably ashamed.The lives of Yuan Jie and I seem to have been swapped.I have enjoyed the love of my parents and the superior family environment for more than 20 years. Yuan Jie, who huddled up in a small village, grew up hard and excellent.

I can't help but think, if I hadn't met my mother and been adopted by the Li family, what kind of person would I be now?

There is a father who was imprisoned for raping his daughter, and his biological mother is unknown. Can I still keep my self-respect and live in this cruel world?

I have never dared to think deeply about this question. The more I think about it, the more afraid I become, and the more afraid I am, the more fortunate I am that my destiny has turned into a bright intersection.In a sense, Yuan Jie's departure fulfilled my hope, which I must admit.

And that's where my guilt comes from.

"I'm doing well, I don't blame you, and I don't hate you, really!" Yuan Jie said seriously.

"You don't blame me, I feel more uncomfortable..." Mom sighed with a wry smile, "Why don't you blame me?"

I held Mom by my arm, and together with Yuan Jie helped her onto the sofa.Yuan Jie comforted her and said, "Auntie, I didn't suffer much, so I don't blame you. Don't think too much, I will come to see you often in the future."

"Hahaha..." Mom gave a weird and painful smile, "Look, you still call me auntie."

Yuan Jie's face darkened, I squeezed my mother's hand quietly, "Mom, we agreed to take it slowly."

Mom was in a daze for a while, "Yes, take your time." She wiped her face, smiled at Yuan Jie, and said, "I'm sorry, kid, I'm so excited, you don't really like the name Xiaoheng, it's okay, let's call him Xiaoheng." Your original name, if it’s not too offensive to you.”

Yuan Jie waved his hands again and again, "Just call me Xiaoheng, it sounds nice, and I'd like to be called that."

Dad interjected: "The original name still sounds better, Xiaoheng Xiaoheng, it sounds better than Yuanjie."

Mom glared at Dad, "Nonsense, it sounds good."

The atmosphere eased up.

"Yeah, they're all good names." I moved closer to Yuan Jie, met his gaze, and smiled tacitly, "Talk with your parents first, they must have a lot to say to you Woolen cloth."

"Dad, Mom, I'll go to the kitchen to see how Chen Zheng's cooking is doing, you two have a good chat." After saying that, I ran to the kitchen again.

In the kitchen, Chen Zheng has already cooked several dishes, and what he is frying now is deep-fried prawns.

I stood next to him and watched him keep his hands flying, turn off the fire, put on the plate, and his movements were smooth and smooth, which was pleasing to the eye.

Chen Zheng: "How is it?"

"Good workmanship."

"I'm not asking you this, I'm asking you over there..."

I thought about it and said, "It's okay."

Mom's wish is only half fulfilled, but I believe it will get better and better.

Because, spring is here.