like her

In Ruan Gai's memory, no one has ever sang to lull her to sleep since she was a child.And she never thought that one day in the future, she would be coaxed to sleep by a child.

What kind of nonsense song was sung, anyway, she didn't even understand the tune.

Miraculously, she was still asleep.

Not long after she fell asleep, the little dirty boy fell asleep beside her bed.

When Ruan Gai woke up in a daze, he propped up his limp body after a night of sleep, and hugged her onto his bed.

When Ruan Gai gently picked her up, the little dirty boy hummed softly.But after Ruan Gai patted his shoulders twice, he put down his guard.

Fall asleep.

I don't know how long they slept, until Ruan Gai heard Lao Mo's voice in a daze, and the two woke up from their sleep.

Ruan Gai got up and went to the window, opened the curtains, and found that it was already dark.

She patted her drowsy head, trying to cheer herself up.

I didn't feel hungry all day long, and I only felt a little hunger after waking up after sleeping.But I was holding my breath again.

Some of the words from the big mouth, to them, are normal complaints and dissatisfaction.

But for children who are developing in adolescence, it is like a knife stabbing hard at the heart.

"Gai Gai, let's go down to eat." At the moment Ruan Gai was in a trance, the little dirty boy came to her and said, pulling her hand.

Ruan Gai hesitated for a while.

The little dirty boy said again: "Old Lin cooked braised pig's trotters. He told me to ask you to eat it, but I was too sleepy, so I fell asleep. Now that we are awake, let's eat."

Ruan Gai nodded after slowing down for two seconds.

Firstly, she was indeed hungry; secondly, although Lao Lin was not a master at cooking, the braised pig's trotters were quite good.

Ruan Gai was still very hungry for that bite.

The little dirty boy was very happy, and took her hand downstairs.

As soon as I arrived downstairs, I saw Ruan Gai's grandmother sitting in front of the house.

She just looked at Ruan Gai like that, and said in her eyes, I knew you wouldn't be able to resist for a long time, and you would come down by yourself.

"The meal is in the kitchen."

Ruan Gai hummed lightly, but did not go to the kitchen.

Instead, he followed the little dirty boy towards the door.

Knowing that Ruan Gai didn't take his words to heart, the old man whispered meanly in dialect: "Running to other people's homes every day, those who don't know think it's someone else's granddaughter who lives with me."

The voice was very small, but Ruan Gai heard every single word in his ears.

As early as a long time ago, Ruan Gai knew that in this family, if she didn't behave very sensible and well-behaved, or if she didn't do something to satisfy the adults.

This is the final result and the responses the adults gave themselves.

Ruan Gai paused in his steps.

The little dirty boy actually heard it too, but because Grandma Ruan Gai spoke a dialect, she couldn't understand it.

I thought the old man said something to comfort Ruan Gai.Every time she is unwell, the adults in the family are very concerned about her.

She thought it was the same situation just now.

Still depressed, why Ruan Gai was so silent in the face of adults' concern.

"Grandma, Gagai is a little uncomfortable, don't blame her." The little dirty boy turned around, looked at the old man sitting at the door, and smiled big.

There was no smile on the old man's face.

The little dirty boy didn't care too much.

After saying hello, the little dirty boy took Ruan Gai's hand again, "Gai Gai, I've already told grandma for you. It's all right. Let's go. Old Mo and the others must have been waiting for a long time."

"Ah."

Ruan Gai never looked back at her grandma who was sitting at the door and staring at her.

A long time later, when someone asked her why she was so indifferent to her grandma, she was your relative, she didn't say much.

Just write in the diary:

"Adults who pretend to be their own relatives have done things that hurt themselves in every age group. How to reconcile. To pretend not to know."

Those who look down on themselves from the bottom of their hearts, feel that they are worthless, that they should do this and that as a woman, and even do not deserve to have a good life, regardless of whether they are relatives or not.

Does it have anything to do with your own life?

Does that person see you as a close relative?

So why should you take it to heart, why should you feel sad to death because of a word from a so-called relative.Even questioning myself over and over again.

It's just that it took Ruan Gai a long time to understand this truth.

Lao Lin's braised pig's trotters are not only delicious, but also not greasy, it really melts in your mouth.

The soup is covered on the rice, and then stirred, the taste has been remembered by Nguyen Gai for many years.So that later, when she started to cook, the first thing she wanted to learn was the braised pig's trotters.

Dirty kids love the smell too.

Mouth full of oil.

Ruan Gaiteng made a move to help her wipe.

The little dirty boy obediently stopped, raised his head slightly, and waited for Ruan Gai to help her clean up: "Thank you Gai Gai."

"You're welcome."

After the two of them arrived, Lao Lin and Lao Mo took out the braised pig's trotters that had been warm in the rice cooker, and filled them with two bowls of rice.They went upstairs separately.

They know how to respect their children's personal and private space.

Sometimes Ruan Gai came to sleep in the little dirty boy's room, and they never asked any more questions.On the contrary, every time the little dirty boy ran to her room to play, and finally fell asleep and was carried back by her, they would feel very embarrassed.

He kept talking, and ran to trouble Gagai again.

It was then that Ruan Gai realized that they had never regarded themselves, or even the little dirty boy, as a child in the traditional sense.

They put them on an equal footing with themselves.

So there will be no such estrangement and generation gap.

For the young Ruan Gai, this guides her so that she will not get lost.

In the end, Ruan Gai didn't take the little dirty boy to the field to see it because of his poor health and troubles at home.Instead, he told her a lot of interesting things about her childhood.

While talking, for some reason, Ruan Gai's younger brother was mentioned.

The little dirty boy is an only child, and she has never experienced the feeling of having brothers and sisters before.But now, from Ruan Gai, she has actually experienced the happiness of being pampered by a big sister, but she doesn't know why she is so twisted, and she has been refusing to admit it——

Ruan Gai is her big sister, and she is Gai Gai's little sister.

So what if there is a younger brother?

Ruan Gai shook his head, "I don't like it. I don't want it. I don't want it."

The little dirty boy didn't seem to understand, "Why, is my brother too naughty?"

Ruan Gai snorted coldly: "Anyway, I just don't like it."

She couldn't open her mouth to tell others that because of the appearance of such a little boy, you found yourself at home without any sense of existence.Even if he is not living with you, you are still the forgotten and neglected child.

"Then I won't talk about him, I don't know him anyway. Is there anything interesting and interesting that I don't know?" The little dirty boy supported his head, waiting for Ruan Gai to tell her a story.

Ruan Gai thought about it for a while, and talked about a time when it rained heavily at home, and then flooded.All the fish in the fishpond were washed onto the road, and the children went to the road to catch fish.It was a great time to play, and no child would not be excited to see the water.

Who knew that he was too self-absorbed to distinguish between the road and the mud field, and fell into the mud field after a somersault.

When I stood up, I was covered in mud.

Like a little clay figurine.

The people around were dumbfounded.

The little dirty boy had never experienced it before, so it was difficult to imagine the scene at that time.

She wondered what happened to the children who fell.

Ruan Gai shrugged: "What else can I do, take him home and get beaten up."

The other children who played together that day were also taken home by the adults in the family, and those who were scolded were scolded and beaten.

The little dirty boy was surprised: "Huh? Why are you still being beaten?"

Nguyen Gai explained: "Because the adults think it is very dangerous, in order to prevent the children from committing the same crime next time, they will beat them up."

"Forehead……"

"Ok."

"Then Gaga, have you ever been beaten?"

Although I hate to admit it.

But she suffered a lot of beatings when she was a child.

"Here, it's normal to be beaten."

This is a way of education for them, which is deeply ingrained and cannot be changed.

After Ruan Gai finished speaking, the little dirty boy didn't answer quickly, but slowly moved to her side, leaning his head against her leg: "Will it hurt?"

Does it hurt?

To be honest, she had long forgotten the pain in her body.

The trauma in my heart is still under pressure.

"It's all over."

Ruan Gai told her so.

That's what I told myself.

Counting the time, it has been more than two months since the little dirty boy came to Lin Town.

During this period, apart from the time when Ruan Gai wanted to take the little dirty boy to the city, he knew about the little dirty boy's parents from Lao Mo, and also knew that the little dirty boy would stay in Lin Town for a while.

As for how long, I don't know for the time being.

After that, she didn't ask again.

In fact, I dare not ask.

She knew that she would leave eventually, and she thought in her heart that the sooner she returned to the city, the better for her to return to her original track, but she also felt that after she returned to her original place, what if she had a bad life? Are you happy here?

What if you are wronged?

What if you can't sleep and need someone to coax you?

Ugh.

Whenever these issues were involved, Ruan Gai would remain silent for a long time.

This question is unsolved.

She can't afford to go to the city.

And the little dirty boy should never stay here.

Forget it, I don't want to.

I still go to Brother Zhou for help, see if I can get the tape I want to find from the city.

When he arrived at Brother Zhou's shop, he was weaving bamboo baskets.

Brother Zhou's handiwork is naturally excellent, but when she entered the door, she seemed to see He Lele sitting in the shop, helping him weave a bamboo basket.

Ruan Gai stood at the door in a daze for a while.

She didn't dare to confirm it, she knew this girl and never ran this way. "He Lele?"

"Hey!" She looked up.

That's her.

"Hey, you came here earlier than me?" Ruan Gai teased.

He Lele smiled and stuck to her: "Uncle Zhou said that the bamboo in front of our house is just right for weaving baskets. I brought it here for him."

Ruan Gai: "..."

So fierce.

Brother Zhou, who was busy, put down his work and looked at Ruan Gai: "Ruan Ruan, don't listen to her nonsense, how could she move it for me, I obviously moved it myself."

Ruan Gai: "..."

In fact, I can't even tell what the atmosphere is like now.

The author has something to say: Ruan: Who am I, where am I, and what am I going to do?