withered color

Xu Liangyun put his hand back obediently, and continued to hug the statement.

Afterwards, Xu Liangyun carried him wherever Chen Yan moved in the kitchen.He didn't say a word, just hugged the statement, buried his head in the crook of his neck, and occasionally moaned twice, as if acting like a baby.

Narratively disgusted, it felt like a piece of live brown candy was pasted on his back, the kind that was particularly mobile.

After the meal was ready, Xu Liangyun got up from Chen Yan.

After two dishes were served on the table, Chen Yu turned on the TV and played a movie casually.

The two of them held a bowl of rice each, eating while watching a movie, chatting a few words from time to time.

"How is it?" Chen Yan asked Xu Liangyun, "Is there too little salt in the eggs? Why do I eat them a bit bland."

"No." Xu Liangyun said, "It's delicious."

"Yes, that's fine."

Statement disgusted to look at Xu Liangyun.

Xu Liangyun sullenly took two mouthfuls of food.This mouthful of rice was big, once it entered his mouth, Xu Liangyun puffed up his cheeks, his cheeks moved like a hamster cooking rice.

This scene was inexplicably touching, and a place in the statement's heart was softened by the warmth, and he smiled softly without knowing it.

Xu Liangyun didn't notice at all.He watched the TV twice, swallowed the food in his mouth, then lowered his head to pick up a chopstick of tofu.

As soon as he stretched out his chopsticks, Xu Liangyun subconsciously looked up and expressed his disgust.

So, the two met their eyes in an instant.

Chen Chen didn't move his chopsticks in disgust, and kept looking at Xu Liangyun.He didn't panic when he met his gaze all of a sudden, instead he smiled softly at Xu Liangyun, his brows and eyes curled up.

Xu Liangyun was stunned by his smile, and stopped in place, forgetting to move for a moment.When Chen Yan asked him what was wrong, he shivered as if he had just woken up from a dream, and he said twice, and sent the piece of tofu that was supposed to be for himself to the Chen Yan bowl, and his words were inexplicably dry Baba: "Eat, eat."

Chen Yan nodded, and also gave Xu Liangyun a scrambled egg: "You eat too."

Xu Liangyun lowered his head like a rattle drum, lowered his head and took several big mouthfuls of rice, as if he had never seen food in eight lifetimes.

The statement was a little funny: "Slow down, no one will grab you."

Xu Liangyun raised his head, chewing rice, his cheeks were bulging, like a big hamster, with rice grains at the corner of his mouth.

Their lives were ordinary, and they were unexpectedly not affected by the incident of "Xu Liangyun wants psychological treatment".After the meal, they washed the dishes, and after the dishes were done, the two of them nestled together, spending the whole afternoon sticky as before.

It was a normal and peaceful day.The two of them stayed at home in the afternoon, and at night they heated up the leftover food from lunch, took it out and ate dinner again.Then I made preparations for the next move, and simply tidied up the house.

Xu Liangyun was tired of moving here, so Xu Liangyun cleaned up the study at home.He said that the study room faces south and has good light, and it will be used as a studio for Chen Chen in the future.

After cleaning up, the two went to the bedroom together, lay down on the bed, and chatted about trivial things together again.For example, whether to move in advance or postponed, such as what time to pick up the dog tomorrow.

Xu Liangyun held the hand of Chen Yan, and said that he would reduce the dosage of medicine tonight, the possibility of getting sick was very high, and it was best not to go out for fear of accidents on the road.

It’s okay to think about it if you are tired of making a statement, so I just said that I will go by myself.

Xu Liangyun said that he had better not go out, but when he was tired of the statement, he felt that he could not leave him at home alone, so he canceled the appointment with the moving company, and planned to wait for Xu Liangyun's two weeks to pass and see the situation.

Life is ordinary, but there is something vaguely unspeakable in my heart when I am tired of reporting.

Looking at the four words mental illness together, it always gives people the feeling that it is a scourge.After coming out of that hospital, Chen Yan always had the premonition that he was going to fight a big monster side by side with Xu Liangyun, and his bones were subtly tensed all day long.

But now, Chen Yan discovered that mental illness is not something that would shout "I'm coming" and then charge over with a big knife—at least Xu Liangyun wasn't.

It is an invisible thing.It will permeate a person's life, it will spread in every corner, it will make Chen Yan feel that Xu Liangyun is being affected all the time, let him really feel that Xu Liangyun is sick, it makes him understand This sickness is here, letting him know that the person in front of him must be very sad, but it is not something that can be cured simply by doing something.

It's sporadic, it's not fatal, but it used to make life worse than death, and now it makes people feel very uncomfortable.

Statement tired and dare not think how Xu Liangyun came here back then.

Before going to bed, he stated that he was tired of lying flat on the bed.Xu Liangyun put his arms around him, put his hands under him, and put his arms around his waist.

The two stared at the ceiling of the room together.

"At this time tomorrow, there will be a kettle under your feet." Chen Yan said.

He said pudding.Pudding is a weird buzzer, and it often makes a whistling sound when it buzzes, which sounds like water is boiling, and Chen Yan sometimes calls it a boiling kettle.

Xu Liangyun smiled softly: "Yes."

"Tomorrow morning, I want to eat fried dough sticks with soy milk." Chen Yan said, "Soak fried dough sticks in soy milk, that's the best breakfast in the world. I'll go buy breakfast tomorrow, what do you eat?"

"Just do the same as you." Xu Liangyun said, "I only took one pill tonight."

"I know." Statement Yan said.

"Will you get sick?" Xu Liangyun said, "It won't be tomorrow morning..."

Statement Yan turned his head sideways in the darkness and looked at him: "Are you afraid?"

"Scared. To be honest, I'm really scared." Xu Liangyun said, "I'm afraid I'll hurt you."

"...No, how could you hurt me." Chen Yan said, "I was in the hospital that day, I wasn't..."

"It wasn't serious that day. When I didn't take the medicine a few years ago, it was terrible when I got sick." Xu Liangyun said, "My mother cried several times when she was here."

"... She has seen it?"

"I've seen it. To be honest, I don't know what I'm going to do, but my mother said it was very scary... Later the doctor said, I was manic and frightened. My mother came to call me at that time, and I directly scratched her to bleed So I'm really afraid of hurting you."

"..."

"I've been taking medicine for the past few years, so there's nothing like that. If you tell me to stop taking the medicine slowly, who can say whether I'll go back—so when I'm sick, stay away from me and hold flowers Stay away from me." Xu Liangyun said, "The flowers haven't been put in the study yet, have they?"

Just as Chen Yan wanted to answer his previous words, when he heard the latter question, he had no choice but to turn the tip of his tongue and answer him: "No, it's in the living room."

"I'll go to the study."

After Xu Liangyun finished speaking, he turned over and got out of bed resolutely. While groping for the location of the mobile phone in the dark, he said, "It's not good if you fall ill tomorrow morning. That's the first flower I bought for you."

Statement Yan: "...you don't need it, you won't—Liang Yun, you didn't take the medicine at that time, and you didn't tell you to stop the medicine immediately, how could you go back all of a sudden, and I'm still—"

Xu Liangyun interrupted him: "No, I'm afraid."

The statement is exhausted.

Xu Liangyun grabbed the phone, turned on the flashlight, and went out. He pulled on the slippers and went to the living room, picked up the flowers, moved them to the study room, and locked the door of the study room.

After he came back, he was a little worried again: "If I get sick in the morning, will it hurt you?"

Statement Yan: "...you don't want to separate from me, do you?"

"..."

Xu Liangyun was silent.Then, he muttered stubbornly, "I'm afraid I'll hurt you."

Statement disgust was a headache, turned his head and let out a long sigh.

"I'm not afraid. Whoever owns a dog has never been caught. Besides, I insist on getting back together with you even after I know you have this problem. What I mean is that I will admit that you caught me and pinched me. I am willing. Accept your illness, understand?"

"……clear."

"Come and sleep when you understand." Chen Yan said.

Xu Liangyun passed obediently.

He lifted the quilt, lay down in embarrassment, and didn't say a word for a long time—even though he agreed, Xu Liangyun might still refuse to let go.

Statement tired and helpless, turned over and hugged him.

He felt Xu Liangyun's body stiffen.

"Don't be afraid." Chen Yan said, "I won't leave, don't drive me away."

Xu Liangyun: "..."

"I'll wake you up—if you get sick," said Chen. "Don't worry, I'm here."

"Those things are over, you can come out, don't look back. Don't look at that time, look at me now."

"I'm fine, Xu Liangyun."

"I'm holding you to sleep, I'm fine."

"I'll buy you soy milk tomorrow morning, I'll wake you up with you in my arms, and I'll kiss you tomorrow morning."

"I'm fine, and so are you."

Chen Yan said: "Sleep, sleep well."

"Dream a dream where we go to an amusement park."

"You accompanied me to the amusement park, and you wore a white T-shirt with a silver chain on it, a dress I bought for you. You bought me cotton candy and ice cream, and you took me on a roller coaster , you picked up the gun and shot me the hardest avocado. At night, you took me to see the fountain, we kissed on the Ferris wheel-you said you love me, you say you love me forever. "

Xu Liangyun slowly closed his eyes.

His expression was restless, but he slowly sank into dreamland.

Statement tired of touching his face, slowly said: "Good night."

He said good night too lightly, as if he was afraid of waking someone up, as if he was afraid of disturbing those bubble-like gentle time.