Before you wake up, love well

Am I really selfish?If there is, it is also to find the so-called happiness of the world.People only have this life, even if there is an afterlife, I am no longer the current self, I just want to be better to myself, I have not harmed anyone's interests, I am living in a very humble way, sometimes I can even give up my interests for the sake of Others, but this matter is not only related to my personal problem, but also Yan Fei.Even if I could choose to sacrifice everything about myself, but in exchange for Yan Fei's unhappiness, why bother?I want Yan Fei to make his own choice.I made a wrong choice once, and since God gave me another chance, I can't give up generously.If Yan Fei chooses this way, I respect it, but if not, I believe there will always be a way to solve the problem.

I walked out of the hospital and stood in the open space of the flower bed at the entrance of the hospital, waiting for him to come out, it shouldn't be too long.I don't want to do anything now, waiting for Yan Fei is the best choice.I have to know what he wants to do.We have to discuss this matter, and there is no way for one person to decide it.

After waiting for a long time, I didn't see Yan Fei coming out, so I became a little impatient.I texted him and told him I was waiting for him at the door.

It wasn't long before I saw his sky-blue coat.As soon as I arrived, I knew that Yan Fei had already cried, because his eye circles were still red.I said, "Come out for a walk, I have something to tell you."

We went to the nearest one, Pingpengliang.Ordered a cup of orange juice and a cup of iced coffee.I took a sip of orange juice and asked him, "How did you come out, and what did your family tell you?"

He didn't look up at me, and lowered his head to take a sip of the coffee in his cup, and said again after a long time: "They have been talking about our problems. My father is very sick, and they hope that I can stay at home to take care of the elderly."

"I can understand their thoughts. Is there anything else? Didn't you leave me?"

"Say it, and let me get married."

"Then what do you think, how do you answer them?"

"I don't know, I'm in a mess right now. I need to think about what the hell I'm going to do."

"Well, I won't talk much, you think about it carefully, but I want to remind you that you must have your own position on some things. Things owed to others can be measured by money, but there is no such thing as family, friendship and love. In terms of standards, no one can say which is the best choice. But you must know which are the most important things to do. Your father's illness is one thing, and whether you want to leave me is another thing. Do you want to leave me? Marriage is another thing, don't mix it up."

I tried my best to control my emotions, and I knew that I couldn't be more impatient at this time, and I couldn't force him to do things or make decisions.He is messed up, so why am I not!I have tried hard to control my words and deeds since the day I knew my sexual orientation. I hope that I am no different from other people in other aspects except for my choices in this area.I even hope that I can do my best to do everything that I should do, and get the approval of others.I have always understood that this road is so difficult. I hope that doing other things can offset other people's views on our group and get more people's acceptance, but I didn't expect that this resistance would be so great that it exceeded my expectations.No matter how well you do, no matter how hard you work, the thousands of years of Chinese society's concept is not so easy to change.Even if the times are advancing, even if the concepts are being updated, what I still can't pass is the barrier of my family.I am grateful to my mother, but how many people like my mother are there in the whole world?