Heart fire

At [-]:[-] in the evening, half an hour before the lights were turned off, the soldiers on duty carried flashlights and inspected the silent office building floor by floor. When they finally returned to the lobby, they saw Wen Yue standing in a daze in front of the publicity bulletin board.

The left half of the bulletin board is a publicity display board for the reform and education of the firefighting force. In the middle to the right, there are two newly issued notices, the group certificate of the last provincial firefighting system skills competition, and the annual training task plan for next year, including Chenchen There are miscellaneous drawings inside the work, and there are also several pennants with different shapes and the same content hanging on them.

On the far right is a list of brigade cadres' information, a row of five-inch photos with a red background, with positions and names marked below.

The one at the top of the list doesn’t look like it was taken in the past one or two years. The person in the photo is a little more youthful and rebellious than now, with a pair of eyes that can’t tell whether it’s gray or brown under the thick eyebrows. In the camera, the expression is three points serious and five points uninhibited, and the remaining two points are the majesty set off by the red background.

Wen Yue stared at it for a long time, without even hearing the passing comrades greet him, until someone approached and put an arm on his shoulder, and he said in a trance like a dream: "I seem to be Lost in love..."

The listless Zhou Tong sighed and patted him on the shoulder to express comfort, thinking, I seem to be too.

Wen Yue rested Zhou Tong's arm on his shoulders, and supported each other like a pair of brothers in distress. He moved two steps to the side, and looked at his dark face in Chenchen's painting, and suddenly became even more frustrated.

"Am I not good-looking enough? He doesn't like me."

Zhou Tong said "nothing" on his lips, and answered one more question in his heart, which is probably worse than the instructor.

"Did you confess? He just refused without any reason?"

When he asked, Wen Yue scratched his hair like a chicken coop, holding his head and looking extremely annoyed: "I haven't had time to say anything yet!"

Zhou Tong glanced at the time, grabbed his arm and helped him go out.

"Pick the key points and expand on them."

"What are you talking about..." Wen Yue limped as if suffering from schizophrenia, and followed Zhou Tong weakly with a mournful face. "I'm stupid, besides, what's the use of telling you, you don't understand..."

When Zhou Tong heard this, his first reaction was to emphasize to him, no matter what, brother has more love experience than you, right?After thinking about it again, oh, what he was referring to... Probably the relationship between men and men.

That really doesn't understand.

If he understands, who has the time to listen to him complaining here...

"Wear and read."

Zhou Tong walked ahead quickly, and only gave Wen Yue an invisible back from the beginning to the end.

"Did you like men before? Or did you just like him? How did you determine your sexual orientation? Have you ever thought about how your family will react when they find out? What should you do if you are sad? What should you do if you object? What should you do if you are pointed out by neighbors?"

"How do you know that you are not in love for a while, but really in love?"

"Is it influenced by someone? But, no one around us is gay..."

"Can two men really be together and do anything?"

"What if I can't have a baby?"

Wen Yue: "..."

Zhou Tong just read all the way without looking back, without giving Wenyue any space to consider and answer, asking one after another, speaking at such a fast speed that one wondered whether he was asking others or asking questions. he himself.

He didn't stop until he was about to reach the corner of the stairs on the second floor of the dormitory, and looked back at Wen Yue, who was still standing still, and said, "Why? Let's go."

Wen Yue looked at him suspiciously for a moment: "I thought you were impaled by my mother's soul."

Only then did Zhou Tong realize that his words and deeds just now were very wrong in Wen Yue's eyes, he quickly rubbed his nose guilty, and stammered to explain: "Aren't I worried about you for your parents... .”

Wen Yue looked at him dubiously, and he hurriedly continued to find fault, trying to change the subject: "After talking for a long time, you made it clear why Team Tu doesn't like you and rejects you?"

Talking about these Wenyue became discouraged again: "He said, let me not get his idea, no matter whether it is a man or a woman, he is not interested at all."

Zhou Tong made a surprised expression: "So amazing?"

Wen Yue nodded: "Well. He said he doesn't believe in bullshit love."

...

This is indeed what Tu Ke said.But there are many parts that Wen Yue is not ashamed to say.He felt too humiliated and frustrated. It was the first time in his life that he took the initiative to show his love to others, but he received such a heartless rejection, which really took a big blow to his self-esteem as a man.

He felt that he had given up all his face, first he was awkward and refused to take the ambulance to transfer back to Beilin, and got into Tuke's car with a stern face; on the way back, he had enough energy to find something to chat with him, Master Zhang Master Shouted all the way, which pot is not open and which pot is lifted, what my dad taught me to be a teacher for a day and a father for life, you teach me boxing, I teach you how to eat chicken, [-]% guarantee Baohui.

Thinking back on Tu Ke's face at the time, it was lucky that he wasn't kicked out of the car.

Probably considering that he was a sick patient and was forced to assume the identity of a master, facing such annoying Wen Yue who changed his patterns, Tu Ke silently endured without having an attack.He answered a few calls in the middle, and turned on the speakerphone because he didn't have a headset, so Wen Yue heard all the calls verbatim.

Tu Ke looked like he didn't care, and didn't avoid it.

The first one was Jiang Xu, who came up and asked him what the hell he was doing. The loud voice and emotional anger made Wen Yue, who was sitting in the co-pilot, tremble, but it was a pity that he hadn't had time to say the second sentence after one sentence. , the phone was hung up, and Tu Kesuo simply refused to answer the call again.

The cheap dad couldn't do it, so he switched to his own mother, but he didn't want to eat the uncle's oil and salt, and he didn't eat the soft and hard.

After two marriages, two Han husbands, and living in a city where Han people gather all year round, Tu Ke's mother still can't speak Chinese well.She weighed her words carefully, trying to please her son carefully. She first asked him when he would be free to come back for dinner, and then asked him how he was doing recently, whether he was tired from training, and got a few responses that were neither salty nor bland, and finally hesitantly said Ask about what Director He's daughter told her.

Before she could ask a few words, Tu Ke interrupted impatiently: "Don't beat around the bush, let me tell you, really."

After a brief silence, Wen Yue heard Tu Ke's mother's self-blaming voice on the phone.

"It's my mother's fault, but my mother really doesn't want to see your views on marriage and love being affected by your parents' marital problems..."

Tu Ke sneered, and glanced at Wen Yue from the corner of his eye.

"Views on marriage and love? This is sexual orientation, innate, what does it have to do with you? You think too much, even if you remarry ten or eight times, it won't have any effect on me. Why don't you apologize to me and put two pillars on my dad Xiang, wait until he has a dream at night, and then ask him if he will forgive you."

"Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot that you believe in Islam. Then chant scriptures, maybe it will work better than burning incense."

Wen Yue watched the nose, nose, and heart from the sidelines, trying to close the five senses and six senses, trying to be deaf.He listened in a fog for a long time, and he probably understood a little bit, and suddenly he felt more distressed and sympathetic to Tu Ke, and the harsh words made him suddenly have an urge to do his best to give this man A warm and happy home for a man who seems tough, unruly and full of scars.

Unprepared, he blushed, his heartbeat was disrupted by this sudden, self-indulgent thought, like a drum beating.

The last call was from an unfamiliar number. Tu Ke's patience was exhausted, and he opened his mouth after answering the call: "Are you finished?"

The other end of the phone obviously didn't respond, and it took a while to hear an old man's voice probing: "Baby?"

Tu Ke: "..."

Wen Yue felt the threat of being silenced for the first time, so he had to blink his innocent eyes desperately: Baby, spare your life, I will never say anything!

Grandma Tu is recuperating in the suburbs recently. There is no wifi in the house. Because she watched Douyin and Dou Di Zhu on her mobile phone for several days, her phone bill and traffic are seriously running out.Tu Ke went to the police for three days and had no time to recharge her. She made this call through a neighbor's landline.

Director He's daughter was chosen by Tu Ke's mother.Although she doesn't want to see her daughter-in-law, Grandma Tu and her have a high degree of agreement inexplicably when it comes to the lifelong events of their precious grandson. A generation of people persevere in spite of all setbacks, and the spiritual realm of becoming more and more courageous.

The old man who is already seventy years old still talks like a cardamom girl, but Tu Ke is an elder.Grandma Tu didn't ask questions immediately, but just "casually" inquired about the name and age of the "little boy" that Miss He said, and then said some trivial things about the parents, and finally ordered Said: "Find a time and bring this little news back for me to have a look."

The little boy Wen Yue was too embarrassed to lift his head.

When Tu Ke saw his pitiful and shy appearance, he couldn't help but want to play tricks.

Tsk, this little face is so red.

So he immediately agreed to grandma's request.

Before hanging up the phone, Grandma Tu asked Tu Ke to ask Beibei to go to the house for dinner when she was free.

Wen Yue: "..."

Baby, Beibei... This nickname came from a name that is even more vulgar than Wen Jinbao and his wife.

Why not call Shuke and Beta?

...

The 130-kilometer journey was completed in less than an hour.Tu Ke confirmed again and again that Wen Yue said that he was fine and resolutely refused to go to the hospital.

There was a lack of moisture in the body, and the lips that were smelling all the way were peeled.Tu Ke talked too much and was thirsty enough, so he turned into the parking lot in front of a supermarket along the way, intending to carry a bottle of purified water in the car.

The duty car didn't have a reversing radar. When entering the warehouse, Tu Ke turned the steering wheel with one hand and leaned on the back of Wen Yue's chair with the other. He turned half of his body and stared at the angle and distance behind.

At this time, Wen Yue didn't know where the courage came from. He stretched his neck and leaned over, and quickly kissed the handsome side face that was close at hand.

A kiss like a superficial touch, made myself blush first.But Tu Ke didn't respond, until he parked the car firmly in the parking space, turned off the engine, and didn't take back his hand after applying the handbrake. well.

"Are you addicted?" He raised his eyebrows and asked.

Wen Yue didn't dare to look at him, he hesitated for a long time and couldn't say a word.

"It's no use." Tu Ke raised one hand and squeezed Wen Yue's chin, forcing him to face himself. "If you want to kiss, you can kiss generously, and you won't charge money, but I advise you not to think about anything else. Even if you kiss me ten thousand times, it's useless to stand in front of me naked. Men and women are the same ,I am not interested."

...

The budding love was strangled in the cradle like this.Wen Yue thought to himself, my love is worthless to him, just like other people's, it's all bullshit.

Zhou Tong saw that his eyes were dull, and his face changed back and forth between red, green, and white according to the memory, so he followed Xi Yang's example and rubbed his head as if he was comforting some small animal.

"Don't think about it, maybe your heartbeat is just a momentary heartbeat. There is a difference between heartbeat and love. Heartbeat is just a shallow resonance..."

Wen Yue felt aggrieved and wanted to cry: "Even you look down on my love."

"How can I!" Zhou Tong was afraid that he would cry, so he hurriedly comforted him. "I'm afraid you're confused and can't figure it out."

"No." Wen Yue sniffed hard, and took the tissue from Zhou Tong. "It's not as complicated as you think."

"Does love have a formula that can be calculated? Can there be an equation that can solve the answer? Is there a theorem that can explain the cause and the result? Love is a chemical reaction that can be traced. Whose love doesn't start from the heart? There is no light, where does it come from?" Deep? How can there be communication without resonance?"

Zhou Tong was taken aback for a moment, and was left speechless by his question.

Who is this?Is it the Wenyue I know?

"Also, the family's understanding and support must be won. It's not fair for any party to compromise, but question their ability to accept it before doing anything, because it is irresponsible and cowardly to conceal and deceive. practice!"

Zhou Tong: "..."

"There are no children to adopt." Wen Yue said flatly in one breath. "Besides, it is inevitable that people of the same sex will not be able to reproduce. We shouldn't be so greedy and want everything."

Zhou Tong was quite shocked, shocked by his own shallowness, and also shocked by Wen Yue's remark that made him wake up and respect him, but he might not be able to hold back his laughter after listening to him say it so solemnly.

So he hugged Wen Yue's shoulders, pressed his head against his chest and knocked hard twice.

"Tell me honestly, when did you start to bend? How do I feel that you have joined some gay-related organizations behind my back, and you can't be a spiritual leader?"

Wen Yue was so suffocated by him that he struggled and shouted: "Hey! Let go! Let go and I will tell you a secret."

Zhou Tong let go of his arms, showing his first smile after leaving the cafeteria tonight.

"What secret? Did you have a crush on me?"

"Bah!" Wen Yue gave him an annoyed look. "You think beautifully."

Zhou Tong was unhappy: "Am I so unattractive?!"

Wen Yue wondered what kind of strength he was comparing, and didn't want him to misunderstand, so he had to explain: "That's not what it means! You are a straight man! For homosexuals..."

Alas, he thought of Tu Ke again.

Both men and women don't like it, and it seems inaccurate to use the word "straight man" to describe him.

"...Falling in love with a straight man is different from moths flying into a flame."

Zhou Tong was still immersed in Wen Yue's deep doubts about his position as a straight man, and when he looked up, he saw his eyes were red.

This time I really cried.

"Don't be sad." The straight man didn't know how to comfort him, so he had to pick up the previous topic and continue to distract him. "Tell me, what's the secret?"

Wen Yue wiped away tears and asked him: "Do you still remember Xue Zicong and Zhang Zhao?"

"Remember." Zhou Tong nodded.The two top students in Xinyi Building 224 were roommates who had been with him and Wen Yue day and night for a semester and a half. "What happened to them?"

Wen Yue blinked, and two teardrops fell down on the collar of the camouflage T-shirt, and he said something that made Zhou Tong's expression stiff and his pupils tremble.

"The two of them are a couple. I bumped into them. They are in the dormitory."

Zhou Tong: "..."

Emotional self has been living surrounded by homosexuality... Zhou Tong was dumbfounded, his jaw was so surprised that he couldn't close his jaw.

Wen Yue was about to elaborate, when the lights-off bell rang for the last time, so the two had to say goodbye in a hurry, and went back to the dormitory separately.

A ray of bright moonlight fell on the head of the bed through the gap in the curtains. Zhou Tong, who had just "broken in love" just now, had insomnia again. It was not difficult to digest such a large amount of information, but he felt a little regretful, because he really wanted to know , What exactly was the scene that Wen Yue encountered was indescribable.