Walk with Light

Jiang Zhao ran towards the crowd, he pushed aside the spectators, forced his way in, and was stopped by the police.

He saw that the floral skirt was stained with blood, Cheng Xueqing fell to the ground in a strange posture, her eyes were closed, as if she had no attachment to this world, she let go completely.

It was a new dress he bought for Cheng Xueqing. It was bright red with bright yellow florals. Cheng Xueqing had never worn it once, and this was the last time she wore it.

Jiang Zhao stood there stupidly, and he wanted to tell Cheng Xueqing that he did well in the college entrance examination and could go to Beijing.He wanted to take her out to play during the summer vacation. If she wanted to go to Guangdong, they would go and have a look, and then stop by...to find Jiang Zhi.

He came back with peace of mind and joy, never expecting that he would be greeted by a corpse with only Wen left.

The policeman pushed Jiang Zhao back. Jiang Zhao resisted vigorously. He grabbed the policeman's arm and said softly, "She is my mother."

His voice was too low for the policeman to hear clearly, and when he continued to enforce the law impartially, Jiang Zhao broke out. He pushed the policeman away, rushed to Cheng Xueqing, and knelt down in front of her.

It wasn't real at all, he knelt in front of Cheng Xueqing, it was still scorching hot at six o'clock in summer, the concrete floor had accumulated heat for a day, and his knees were burning like fire, but he didn't seem to feel it, his whole body was shaking Trembling, like falling into an ice cave.

When he went out in the morning, Cheng Xueqing cheered him up and said that he would wait for him to come back.

Jiang Zhao blinked his sore eyes, breathing was a bit difficult, and he was almost out of breath.He wiped his face, it was dry, and he didn't cry.

As the sun sets, the crowd gradually recedes and someone has to clean up the situation.

Jiang Zhi's phone number is empty, Cheng Xueqing's family is in the countryside, Jiang Zhao has no adults around him, he only has himself.

Cheng Xueqing was sent to the funeral parlor to have a beauty treatment and help her paint half of her broken face.When people come and go, they can't take anything with them, and they can't ruin their appearance, which is not good-looking.Jiang Zhao took out a photo of Cheng Xueqing when he was young from the wallet compartment, and asked the embalmer to turn it into a picture.

People have to be cremated, and in the end there is only a handful of ashes left in such a small urn.Jiang Zhao was holding her ashes, his eyeballs were scarlet, and the eye sockets were deeply sunken, dejected like a homeless person.

Cheng Xueqing was only in her early forties when she left, and Jiang Zhao sat by her grave for a whole day.

He didn't dare to speak his heart to her until she was gone.

When Cheng Xueqing was ill, Jiang Zhao was only sensible, so he was told that his mother was mentally ill and might not recover.

Jiang Zhao had no idea at that time, and he didn't know what his mother's illness meant to him until a year or two passed.

In his unadorned world, Cheng Xueqing's indifference to him is the loss of maternal love. He can't say that he has no mother, he has a mother, but he can't accept this mother.

Jiang Zhao sometimes reads the news, which reports that some children have become homeowners too early when their father or mother suffers from mental illness.Most of those children were born in poor families, and their clothes were not neat enough, but their eyes were firm and their faces were sad, and the reporters might cry when they were interviewing them.

That is the suffering in the world, and he has to bear this suffering after falling into this world.

He admired these children very much, because he was immature and did not have a strong heart to bear this suffering.

"Mom, I'm sorry." Jiang Zhao choked up, his eyes were red, and he said in a low voice, "You must not know, I thought before, it would be better to have no mother than to have a mother like you."

Jiang Zhao sniffled, unable to say what to say next.

He complained about why God didn't give him a healthy mother, especially when his peers enjoyed this maternal love. He didn't have a mother to cook for him, sew cotton for him to go to school, and take him to buy clothes .He is like a savage child who has no one to discipline him, he has to learn to grow through his stumbles.

"I was ignorant before, and I thought viciously. If you are gone, it will definitely be a relief for me." Jiang Zhao squatted in front of her grave, curled up in a ball, still playing with white chrysanthemums in his hands, the sun seemed to shine If you don't enter here, the tombstone will always be ice, "Mom, why am I so bad."

"Why don't you tell me that you are unhappy, I grow up, can't I support you? You like beautiful clothes, I will buy you a whole wardrobe, you like to eat snacks, I can take you to the supermarket every day, you want money , I can make money too. You see, I have already thought about it, I can accept you, I will give you a pension, but how did you go so fast?"

Jiang Zhao lowered his head, his chin resting on his knees, his eyes were blurred, his heart was filled with grief, and the valve of tears was closed.

After the results of the college entrance examination came down, when Li Jinghe contacted Jiang Zhao, he realized that he was no longer available.He is busy with treatment, and lives in the ward every day, and dare not call Jiang Zhao, for fear that he can't help complaining to Jiang Zhao, people will become numb after being ill for a long time, and feel wronged when they meet someone they love.They should share all the good things in the world, but they have to digest the suffering alone.

Xiang Xinhua broke down the door of Jiang Zhao's house. She was a girl named Unlocking Company. She refused to open the door, so she took a big ax and opened the door that Jiang Zhao blocked.

Jiang Zhao's house is very dark, the curtains are not drawn, the windows are not open, there is a stuffy smell, it doesn't seem like an environment where people should stay.She found Jiang Zhao in Cheng Xueqing's room, he was huddled in the closet, sickly like a ghost, unable to see the light.

"Jiang Zhao, are you enough? One month has passed, should you adjust yourself?" Xiang Xinhua pulled Jiang Zhao's arm and pulled him out with all his strength.

Jiang Zhao didn't speak, and didn't look at Xinhua, his big empty eyes couldn't focus, and he just stared blankly at the floor in a daze.

Xiang Xinhua called him, but he should not.

"Jiang Zhao, I checked your grades for you. You did very well in the exam and exceeded our expectations. You can go to the place you dreamed of." Xiang Xinhua squatted next to Jiang Zhao and said calmly: "I failed the exam. I'm going to be a soldier, can you see me off when I leave?"

She didn't expect Jiang Zhao to return to her, and continued: "I know, you are very sad, but you know that people have to live. When you want to calm down, come and call us, we are always here."

Before Xiang Xinhua left, Jiang Zhao didn't give her any response.

Regardless of Li Zhao's objections, Li Jinghe found Jiang Zhao's house. He couldn't live without people, so Li Zhao stayed downstairs and wanted to take Li Jinghe back.

The door of Jiang Zhao's house was locked, Li Jinghe couldn't open it, and Jiang Zhao didn't reply when he sent a message, so he had to call through the door: "Jiang Zhao, it's me, can you come out and meet me?"

"Talk to me, let's talk about our future, okay? Don't think about it alone."

The neighbor across the door opened the door and took a look. Li Jinghe apologized apologetically. He took out the pen he had with him and wrote a note to Jiang Zhao:

Jiang Zhao, don't close yourself, tell me something.

I can be your partner, your father, your mother, your brother, your friend.I am your family.

You still have me.

He stuffed the note into Jiang Zhao's house through the crack of the door, but couldn't wait for an answer, so he had to leave first.

It was time to fill out the application form, but Jiang Zhao didn't contact anyone. Li Jinghe waited until he was flustered, and Li Zhao urged him to study abroad to treat his ears. He was anxious like an ant on a hot pot.

The weather in August is as hot as an oven.When Jiang Zhao went to Guangdong alone, he didn't tell anyone. He checked Cheng Xueqing's last chat records, and the person she called was Jiang Zhi.Jiang Zhi proposed divorce to her in the last phone call, but Cheng Xueqing was unwilling.

Sitting on the high-speed train, Jiang Zhao looked at the strange scenery flashing by outside the window, feeling very upset.

The high-speed train was very fast. He arrived at Guangzhou Station at 07:30 in the evening, and then took a taxi to the address that Jiang Zhi had left for them at the beginning.He knew that Jiang Zhi might not be here anymore, but it didn't matter, he could ask him one by one.

It was three days after Jiang Zhao found Jiang Zhi. He found the address of the apartment on the side of the stadium. After squatting for a long time, the scorching sun was burning on his body like a torture. Jiang Zhao guarded Jiang Zhi sweating profusely.

It didn't look like a father's back, he had the impression that his father's back was tall and generous, the man in front of him was fashionable and rich, when he rubbed shoulders with Jiang Zhao, he didn't even look at him.

Jiang Zhao shouted at him: "Jiang Zhi!"

Jiang Zhi turned his head hesitantly, looked at Jiang Zhao, recognized him for a long time before calling: "Jiang Zhao?"

Jiang Zhao was carrying a bag with a fruit knife in it. He walked up to Jiang Zhi bitterly, and asked, "Do you know that my mother is dead?"

Jiang Zhi nodded, he heard about it.

"It was you who killed her." Jiang Zhao's eyes were full of hatred, and his mind was full of those unfeeling words Jiang Zhi said to Cheng Xueqing. If a man doesn't love a woman anymore, he can tell her to eat Tell her to die.

Jiang Zhi glared angrily, and shirked responsibility and said, "Why do you come here like a debt collector? If she's gone, she'll be gone. Can I revive her or something? We haven't seen each other for so long. Let's go home with Dad." , I'll show you your brother."

Jiang Zhao's eyes were scarlet, he couldn't imagine how Jiang Zhi said these words, did Jiang Zhi have no heart?won't it hurt?

"I don't have a younger brother, I only have a mother who passed away." Jiang Zhao said word by word, he hated Jiang Zhi to death.

Jiang Zhi chuckled lightly, as if disdainful of Jiang Zhao's words, for such a young child, he still doesn't know what is best for him to choose.

He has money, and Jiang Zhao will never make trouble with money for a dead person.

"Don't lose your temper with me. If you want to go home, follow me. If you come looking for bad luck, get out of here." Jiang Zhi lost his patience under the scorching sun, and said very bluntly.

Jiang Zhao narrowed his eyes, took out the account book from his pocket, and tore off the page of the head of the household. His slender fingers were like steel knives, and resolutely tore up the page of Jiang Zhi.

"Jiang Zhi, you will suffer retribution, you don't deserve love at all." Jiang Zhao threw up the scraps of paper, like Yang Jiangzhi's ashes, and threw the rubbish on his face.

Jiang Zhao left just like that. What he left behind was the assets Jiang Zhi left to his son. He chose a difficult path, but he didn't regret it at all.

People don't make money difficult.

The day Jiang Zhao came home happened to be raining, and the pouring rain was like a flood, almost eating people.When he went downstairs, he met Li Jinghe and a strange man standing beside him.

Seeing Jiang Zhao, Li Zhao couldn't help criticizing, "Is your mobile phone a landline? Can't you read the news?" Li Jinghe sent countless messages and made hundreds of phone calls, but Jiang Zhao was never seen. have responded.

Jiang Zhao was stunned, he was still full of hostility, the feeling of being abandoned by the world made it difficult for him to communicate with others calmly, "It's my right to read or not to read the news, you don't need to point fingers."

Li Zhao wanted to get angry, but was stopped by Li Jinghe, "Dad, don't talk about him." Li Zhao glanced at him sideways and fell silent.

"Jiang Zhao, you haven't replied to my message for many days, I'm worried about you." Li Jinghe's pronunciation was a bit strange, and he spoke very slowly because of his tongue.

Jiang Zhao's throat slipped, he was a little tired, his body was so weak that he just wanted to be paralyzed, and he didn't have the energy to reply to Li Jinghe for the time being.

"You should report your volunteer application as soon as possible. The deadline will be tomorrow afternoon. Don't delay." Li Jinghe continued. He looked at Jiang Zhao and suspected that Jiang Zhao was whispering something. He didn't read it, so he went on Looking at Li Zhao, Li Zhao shook his head at him, and he knew that Jiang Zhao didn't reply to him.

"You, don't be sad. If you have any difficulties, just tell my dad, and they will help you." Li Jinghe's articulation is too weird. He couldn't hear the sound or feel the vibration of the sound waves for a long time. He couldn't figure out what he said. Is it a complete sentence, whether the other party can understand it.

Jiang Zhao looked up at him in bewilderment, wondering what Li Jinghe meant by these words.

"Jiang Zhao, I'm sorry, I'm going abroad for ear treatment. I can't miss the best period of treatment. I have to go." Li Jinghe had a sad expression on his face. He made this decision without discussing it with Jiang Zhao. Way, Jiang Zhao didn't give him a chance, and he didn't have time to waste any more.

Jiang Zhao stared at him blankly, his fresh blood seemed to be frozen by Li Jinghe's words again, he stood stiffly, the bones all over his body could no longer withstand the hammering of any words.

Li Jinghe stepped forward and gave Jiang Zhao a hug as a farewell.Jiang Zhao smelled a strong smell of traditional Chinese medicine from him, and he could no longer smell that refreshing tea fragrance.

Before Li Zhaolin left, he still said, "Jiang Zhao, this world is not yours alone. If the sky falls, the world will be destroyed. Others are living and struggling for life. Be mature, Don’t take any responsibility at all.”

His words were like a whip, slamming on Jiang Zhao's body, be more mature.Jiang Zhao pondered these four words, as if he had been troubled by these words all along.

He has to grow up, he has to grow into a qualified adult on his own.