It's too late to marry a cat [Interstellar]

If it were someone else telling me how to live my own life, meddling in the east and west, and caring about the temperature of the water I used for bathing, with Yahuiquan's bad temper, which is generally recognized as bad, and he thinks it is indeed bad, he should have been treated by the first time. When tampering with the settings of the temperature control board, he became furious, and the guy who dared to tamper with the value was picked out and scolded for at least ten rounds.

A person like him who has been in high position and authority for a long time, and who has been saying the same thing for a long time in his jurisdiction, is usually prone to have a problem-but all the data and parameter settings that he has handled are done by himself, so he will take it for granted. regard themselves as the standard.

Others have always had to follow the standards and act according to his settings.

No one has ever challenged the "standard" and changed his settings without even saying hello.

If this kind of behavior of "ignoring Shangfeng's instructions and arbitrarily modifying the officer's regulations" is placed in the Glorious Wing Fortress, in addition to being criticized face-to-face by the general Yashang, the person concerned will have to be fined after the approval. It must be accompanied by an inspection with a considerable number of words.

If the circumstances are serious, they will even get a prohibition order with a time limit to be determined. During the effective period of the ban, they will no longer be allowed to board the mecha, and will be restricted from participating in all cruises and drills.

——Anyway, the tragic end made all colleagues sigh.

"Following the officer's standard" is almost something that has been engraved into the DNA of the troops directly under the Wing of Glory.

However, just like the cat once invaded Admiral Ya’s private territory, it once got into General Ya’s bedroom uninvited late at night, and climbed on the pillow in a grandiose manner, and once it broke into the territory, it went straight to the piece on the head of the person. "core area".

Li Dandan didn't get any punishment for what he did before, and the general in charge didn't even resist symbolically. He expressed a compromise with the cat that day, and let the cat live in his bedroom for a long time, snoring above his head every day. .

A cat is a living thing—especially a domestic cat that is picked up by the shit-shoveling officer himself and is getting used to it more and more.

They are presumably truly privileged.

Li Dandan changed the temperature control board of Yahuiquan and directly developed it into a long-term project.

Recently, as long as it detects that people have entered the bathroom, the cat will follow it step by step to the bathroom door like a hot water inspector, observe and display the water temperature, and study whether it is necessary to use its high jumping skills to assist in temperature regulation.

It was the first time in all that Yahui Spring had been suddenly adjusted in temperature, and expressed dissatisfaction once when it was almost scalded by high-temperature hot water.

Still very limited.

When he went out with a "meow", it seemed that the annoyed front had completely collapsed, and in the end he was not dissatisfied with making a name for himself.

The second time, when Li Dandan came to adjust the water temperature in the bathroom, General Ya was speechless for a while to the cat's "come and go like the wind".

This time he wasn't too angry.

He tried to explain his feelings with "I'm surprised that the cat knows how to upgrade the service, and I don't have time to be angry" to explain his mood, and finally left him in the hot water, and did not quit to reset the water temperature, which was regarded as out of " Repeatedly adjusting the temperature is too time-consuming, and this time the temperature adjusted by the cat is not "unusable".

Wait for the third time, the fourth time...

General Ya calmly evaluated his compromise and concession, and realized that people should not lie to themselves anymore.

His entire attitude towards the cat's behavior of touching the temperature control panel has completely changed: "It's coming again? It's okay."

Who in the whole family is the most elated, but it is not Li Dandan who has successfully interfered with people's low-temperature bathing habits.

It's Baili, the electronic housekeeper.

In Baili's database, long-term low-temperature bathing is an act that is not beneficial to human health. He has fought wits with his master many times in the past, and tried very hard to reverse his master's habits.

However, no matter how smart the electronic housekeeper is, it is only a program, and it cannot override the authority of the owner to call out seven or eight mechanical arms like steel spiders without authorization, forcing people into a more comfortable and warm lifestyle.

Things that artificial intelligence cannot do were successfully conquered by a cat. Baili said enthusiastically to the cat: "Great! Mr. Li, this family is so lucky to have you, you are worth a hundred small dried fish!"

Yahuiquan, who was passing by, paused when he heard it: "..."

He wondered if Baili had downloaded some completely nonsense data such as "cat language translator" or "reading cat machine" without authorization.

Otherwise, an AI and a cat, from species to language, are not the same. Why does the artificial intelligence think that it can understand the mind of the cat, and even chat with the cat in a serious manner?

"I can't even read it." Ya Huiquan thought to himself.

But he opened his mouth and seamlessly connected to the conversation between the AI ​​and the cat, saying: "A hundred small fish will be saved."

Li Dandan, who was suddenly cheated of dried fish, turned his head, and felt that he was a bit like a rumored "scheming cat".

To be honest, Xiaoyu is not very attractive to it, and it is not something that it thinks about day and night without having one or two meals. It can vaguely feel that its own recipes are actually very extensive, and it is a "fraternity" in terms of diet. , and not too picky.

However, in order not to defeat the intention of the person who wanted to tease it with the small fish, the cat still put on a gesture of worrying about the small fish.

"Meow." Li Dandan said.

It acted like it was real, asking people why it didn't deserve a hundred small dried fish.

Yahuiquan, who was going to the study, changed his direction temporarily. He walked to the high-back chair where the cat was lying on his stomach, and reached out to pick the cat up and weigh it.

"You've gained weight again." The person who has become more proficient in unarmed weight measurement said matter-of-factly, "Instead of giving you a hundred dried fish, it's better to replace the cat climbing frame at home and replace it with an adjustable one this time." Size, higher load-bearing."

Li Dandan's weight has been infinitely approaching the "8" mark recently, and it is estimated that it is not far away from breaking through double digits.

The old cat climbing frame at home was bought in the first week after Li Dandan was brought home by Yahuiquan. People bought it according to the weight of the kitten at that time, which was less than half a catty, and the upper limit of the load was ten catties.

General Ya originally thought that it would be at least half a year before his cat would grow to ten catties, but Li Dandan would be small and thin, as if he was undernourished and stunted.

Who knew that he was so talented when he gained weight.

For Li Dandan, it seems that it only takes a moment to reach ten catties.

Ya Huiquan also tried to compare the information of it with other kittens of the same age, and found that Li Dandan seemed to be bigger than others in terms of weight and size, like a little bully cat that stands out from the crowd in the milk cat kindergarten.

However, as long as it does not affect the health, the veterinarian also confirmed that Li Dandan is in good health. The cat is nothing more than fatter and stronger, so what does it matter?

After comparing the data, the eccentric excrement shoveler thought that Xiaobawang was better than other people's cats.

He withheld the cat's dried fish in exchange for a more nutritious and balanced growth meal for Li Dandan.

"The results of the last physical examination were not bad." General Yashang, who cared about the kitten's growth with all his heart, fell into an occupational disease inadvertently, and made a training menu for the cat, said, "But if you eat too much snacks, you will not be able to move." If you eat too little, you may not be able to meet the standard in the next physical examination-this month, the snacks will be reduced by 50%, and the canned cat food and nutrition cream will remain the same. After the new cat comes home, you have to extend the activity time appropriately. time."

Li Dandan: "..."

If Li Dandan was a cat who was stingy and caring, and would calculate gains and losses with humans, it would definitely howl with anger after hearing this speech about arranging fitness for it.

Because there's a reason the cat has been less active lately—its nighttime parkour has largely been cancelled.

On the night of the cat’s last parkour in the near future, it got up quietly in the thick night, left the pillow with absolute lightness, then turned over and got out of bed, and with the cooperation of the electronic housekeeper, it slid out of the narrow space like a shadow. Narrowly opened the door slit of a first-line space to ensure that no cold wind from the outside can blow into the bedroom with constant temperature.

It is very different from when he first arrived at this home. Li Dandan's weight has increased, and his body is not as small as before. However, he can control this body that has grown a lot, but his skills and body control are worse than before. With growth Many figures were running fast along the corridor, but the cat was still silent. Its long tail was like a perfect direction-changing aid. With a delicate swing in mid-air, the whole cat jumped up with force from its hind legs. It can jump directly from the stairway to the middle of the stair railing, and it only needs to jump three times in total, and the long staircase will be "flyed" directly by it, allowing it to reach the first floor efficiently.

Baili continued to cooperate with the cat. The 24-hour electronic housekeeper saw another owner going straight to the event, so he understood and turned on the noise reduction device in the activity room in advance, so that the cat can fully release its night nature in it and have a good time. Use up redundant energy.

Li Dandan thought her actions were flawless.

Its movements are lighter than the ambient white noise, and it is "sewing in and out" when entering and leaving the room. It also carefully pays attention to the state of human beings before and after getting up to ensure that Yahuiquan is not awakened by it.

...However, when the cat that was having a great time parkour came back, it ran to the stairs on the floor where the bedroom was located. Just after turning the corner of the stairs, it saw a light from the bedroom.

People have woken up.

That would be 03:30 in the morning.

Yahuiquan was not still asleep in a deep sleep, as the cat thought.It was as if he suddenly remembered that he still had an unfinished job in the middle of the night. When the cat walked into the room, he saw him leaning against the bed, turning on a dimly lit small lamp, and adjusting a few dollars from the personal terminal on his wrist. The light screen is suspended, and something is vaguely being calculated on the screen.

Noticing that the cat had returned to the room, the person did not make a sound, but quietly stretched out his hand towards the cat.

The moment Li Dandan jumped onto the bed again, Ya Huiquan also turned off the terminal and all the screens, almost simultaneously, and the small lamp by the bed dimmed.

They said nothing to each other.

The cat walked cautiously back over the pillow, and the man then pushed his head back into the pillow.

The room went dark exactly at the exact moment they were in their respective places.

"He should have woken up after I went out."

Li Dandan thought in the dark.

It also felt that the person turned his head sideways in his direction, and buried half of his cheek into its cat's belly.

From this night onwards, Li Dandan made up his mind, and unless necessary, he would try to avoid night parkour, even if the movements could be light, he would not get up in the middle of the night casually.

It "invaded" a human's life in a step-by-step manner. Yahuiquan was already used to falling asleep on the cat's belly and snoring, and now the cat slipped away in the middle of the night, as if it would activate the body's own radar. , so that people who have lost their little snorers and cat bellies wake up quickly, and it is difficult to fall asleep again in the sudden drop of sleep treatment.

What can a cat do?

Of course, cats who worry about people can only choose to put people first.

However, Li Dandan didn't expect that after it stopped running at night for a while, people would start thinking about its exercise again and want to urge it to exercise!

Regarding Yahuiquan's earnest exercise proposal, Li Dandan finally said, "...meow."

It doesn't care about anything and doesn't fight for reason. It is a tolerant and caring genius kitten. It just expresses to people very helplessly——

I'll give it a try, as long as you're happy.

Ya Huiquan held a completely different script from the cat's. He gave advice based on the cat's health, consciously like a parent who worried about the growth of the cub.

Hearing the cat's meow back to him, he relaxed his brows, feeling that the cat answered him with a "yes", so he couldn't help reaching out and stroking the kitten's head again.

He thinks his cat is really well behaved.

"Okay." Ya Huiquan said, "Go ahead and play, I'll go to the study for a remote meeting."