Dashuai and cross talk

The adjutant was dragged out of his close friend's bed overnight, and received a solid beating.

With a broken body and a strong will, he demanded to take the crime and make meritorious deeds.

In the end, he completed the task with injuries, and finally got the right one.

Marshal Chun Xiao once, before he could feel comfortable, the rumors outside surrounded the Marshal's mansion.

The day before, the cross talk teahouse was full of chickens and dogs, and the day after that, the theater garden was in a state of restlessness.

After such a commotion, everyone in Fengtian City knew that the commander-in-chief was having sex with the artists.

All of a sudden everyone felt insecure, those who sang the drums and those who talked about storytelling all hid away... Even the blind man who set up a fortune-telling stall joined in the fun and didn't dare to go out of the stall for three days in a row.

Only the people in Goulan Courtyard are struggling to make a living, and feel that the commander-in-chief doesn't take care of him, and even their business has been robbed.

Complaints abound, people's grievances boil.

The marshal can punch and kick teahouses, but he can't stop Youyou's mouth.

He can't care about the common people and appears to have no identity.

He also doesn't like to listen to old ladies talking badly, for he is afraid that he will kill himself with a gun.

The commander-in-chief was so aggrieved that he didn't even want to come out.

Fortunately, Shang Xiaolou, who has just snatched an opera singer, came back and could chat to relieve boredom.

Shang Xiaolou is really a famous actor, with a good figure, a bright voice, and a look that looks like he is looking forward to it. He made his debut in the commander's residence.

The Marshal is a dutiful son, in front of his old mother, he has to take back whatever he thinks.

So the handsome mansion held meetings every night, and the handsome man was empty every night.

Damn it, what the hell is this called!

The stage was set up in the front yard, and the gongs and drums were blaring.

The commander-in-chief can only wander around the backyard, out of sight and out of mind.

Unexpectedly, the backyard is also very lively.

The crosstalk talker found a table from somewhere, and it was covered with red velvet cloth, and there were eye-catching, folding fans, and white handkerchiefs on it.

He put on his coat by himself and stood behind the table. Although he looked a bit out of shape, it was very interesting.

A few concubines who don't like to listen to opera gathered a few tables in the backyard, nibbling melon seeds and adding tea, laughing and cheering, and they were quite supportive.

The marshal suddenly remembered that this grandson still owed him some love.

Leaving aside the matter of burnt crotch, the thing about "Three Emperors and Five Emperors" sounds quite satisfactory.

The commander-in-chief doesn't lack money or guns, but he lacks an opportunity to dominate the world.

Taking the "Three Emperors and Five Emperors" as an example, this kid is exactly what the commander-in-chief wanted.

So he stopped, ready to hear what the cross talk talker had to say.

The crosstalk talker coughed lightly, and opened his mouth to come: "The general is born with courage and courage, with an autumn water and a goose feather knife on his waist. The wind blows, drums, mountains and rivers move, and lightning flashes. .On the day of the return of the Taiping Edict, I and the general——take off our battle robes!"

The commander-in-chief originally sounded beautiful, but the last sentence was not very pleasant.

"Zhen" your mother is so pissed off!

I haven't become king yet, so hurry up and down!

On the contrary, the aunts and wives were excited and clapped and applauded: "—one more!"

Being called out by the aunts and wives, the commander-in-chief lost the opportunity to scold him.

Those who talked about cross talk clasped their fists in return, and the aunts and wives booed and fought Yangzi.

Unable to stand the constant laughter of warblers and swallows, another cross talk came up: "A bent tree is straight and must eventually bend, and it is difficult to raise a wolf as a dog to watch over the house. It is not long before ink dyes cormorants black, and whitewashed crows are not strong. Candied fruit Huang Lian needs bitterness in the end, and picking melons and fruits by force cannot make them sweet. Good deeds must be done by good people, how can there be a mortal who can be a god."

The aunts and wives began to applaud again.

The commander-in-chief fell into deep thought.

He was born in a poor family. He fled to the rivers and lakes when he was a teenager. He slaughtered pirates and innocent people.

It is difficult to take a step forward, and it is also difficult to take a step back.

Once an old man with a strong nose told his fortune, saying that he had too much killing karma.

He didn't like to listen, so he hung the old Taoist at the entrance of the Taoist temple, and sent someone to scold the old Taoist for three days.

But now looking back on the early years, I feel that I am in such a state of being black or white, and it has nothing to do with killing too many people.

In the past, he was afraid of tigers and wolves, and in the future, he was afraid of being stabbed by traitors.

Life like this is really not human's life.

Yes, send someone to the Taoist temple tomorrow to donate some sesame oil money.

He didn't want to be a fairy, but he didn't plan to be a mortal either.

Losing money and atonement will bring disaster relief, after all, you can buy a reason with peace of mind.

As soon as the commander-in-chief was distracted, the voice of Yingyan in the backyard gradually died down, and the story turned again.

Talking about the cross talk, the expression is light and shallow: "The most hurt is the late cool day, and the haggard person is unbearable. Inviting wine to destroy the intestines and three cups of drunkenness, looking for fragrance and dreaming about the cold at five o'clock. The hairpin head and Feng Xieqing have tears, and the flowers are in full bloom. I have no chance. The small building is lonely and the new rainy moon is as difficult as a hook—it is also difficult to round."

The aunts and wives shouted with infinite sadness.

The handsome man almost burst into tears.

Although he is a rough old man, it's not that he hasn't had any real feelings.

Before rebelling and fighting with the second brother who worshiped him, he had a marriage in his hometown.

Ernier of Zhao's family, the head of the village, grew up with him. She is beautiful and smooth, and she is a flower in their village.

However, before the daughter-in-law could get through the door, the former dynasty died and the devil came.

The big girls and the little daughter-in-laws in the village were all ruined by the little devils.

Ernier also died.

The commander-in-chief who was not a commander-in-chief back then was so red-eyed that he took up a knife and gun to fight the little devil, and this battle has been fought until now.

The battle is not over, and the devils are not dead.

Dashuai has become a Dashuai.

But even so, Ernier, who was a flower in the village back then, couldn't survive after all.

What trouble is a man without a wife?

Since then, the commander-in-chief has identified his only goal. Even if he lives a life of bullying men and women, he still looks the same as before.

Including Shang Xiaolou who was snatched back two days ago, it is also because his eyes resemble Erni the most.

When the green plum is gone, the bamboo horse will grow old.

The men and women I snatched back are very similar to you.

Dashuai was moved by himself and cried.

The sour emotions of love between men and women were all aroused by the poem about cross talk.

The Marshal stood in the corridor of the backyard of the Marshal's Mansion, blowing his nose with red eyes.

The old tears are vertical and horizontal, and the tears are hazy.

The marshal's eyes were dimmed with tears, and even the mediocre face that talked about cross talk seemed pleasing to his eyes.

The person who snatched it back cannot be sent back, so treat him better in the future.

But at this moment, the voice of talking about cross talk started again.

"The horse is skinny, has long hooves and is fat. The couple sleeps and fights over the heat of the kang. The old man wants to sleep in the kang, but the wife refuses to let her beg for help. The old man says I picked the firewood, and the wife says I burned the kang. The old man said he was sleepy and wanted to sleep, but his wife said no. The old man picked up the ash rake, the wife picked up the rolling pin, and the old couple beat each other until dawn. Good hot kang - no one slept!"

The big man: "..."

The speaker has no intention, the listener has the heart.

It was very unpleasant to hear these words in the ears of the handsome.

Damn it, what do you mean by being a little kid?

This is... satirizing him as a handsome man, stealing a common man and coming back just to watch but not to sleep?

Fuck, it's not because of your ugly appearance that I can't get down.

The aunts and wives laughed.

The handsome man's face was ashen.

Dashuai felt that he was being targeted.

The marshal thought angrily, okay, I'll take care of you when I get back tonight!

The crosstalk talker immediately came up with another paragraph: "Abiding by the law is always sad, and the strong beams sing every night. Riding horses and mules at the expense of others and benefiting oneself, honesty and justice starve. Repairing bridges and repairing roads and blindness, killing and setting fires. I went to the west to ask me Buddha, Buddha Said: I have no choice!"

The big man: "..."

Damn it, it's a good one.

Why is there so much nonsense about cross talk?

Also, what kind of stuff does he always recite, what about single mouth?

The commander-in-chief finally felt something was wrong.

The aunts and wives in the backyard all fainted from laughter, still shouting, still booing: "—Come again! Come again!"

The commander-in-chief couldn't hold back the field at all, and he didn't show any anger at all.

What's good?A bunch of stupid old women with no brains!

Dashuai felt like he was going to explode.

Shouts came one after another, and they said that the cross talk was proud of the spring breeze, and they cupped their hands again: "The golden mountain and bamboo shadows are thousands of years old, the clouds fly high and the water flows by itself. The Yangtze River floats on the jade belt for thousands of miles, and a silver moon rolls a golden ball. Three thousand miles from Hubei, nearly To the sixteen prefectures in the south of the Yangtze River. The beautiful scenery can't be seen for a while, but there is a destiny in the sky—the middle of the painting."

The loudest one among the concubines preempted with a high-pitched voice: "Okay—"

Before he finished his voice, the handsome man Shen Dantian said, "Okay, you've got a badass!"

"Prodigal, silly old bitch!"

"You don't even know how to worry when you're done!"

The sound shook the audience.

Even those who talked about cross talk, with aunts and wives, all looked over.

The women all stood up like a mouse seeing a cat, and stood side by side.

The commander-in-chief Ang Zhou strode forward and sat down in the middle of the garden.

The aunts and wives are busy with shoulder-squeezing, leg-beating, tea-serving, and water-pouring.

"You! That bastard whose eyes are blurred by clouds!"

The handsome man looked up and said cross talk.

"Small upper floors."

"Yes, it's just you. Don't you want to talk about stand-up comedy? What kind of sour poems to recite? Say it!"

While talking, the commander-in-chief pulled away the aunt who was beating her leg with his foot, and took out the gun from his waist.

With a "click", the gun was loaded.

With a "snap", he slapped the table.

The handsome man said fiercely: "Say!"

The executive shrank his neck and was about to cry: "Marshal, I can't come!"

"Why? Don't you give me face?" The commander-in-chief shot the gun again, "Say it quickly!"

High-level: "You are handsome...you are not good at learning."

The commander-in-chief was indifferent.

The executive took a deep breath: "I can only recite the opening poem."

The big man: "..."

On the night of the relationship, I said that I would serve a single mouth for a while, what about the silly boy?

The commander-in-chief's face was uncertain.

The high-level executives watched their words and expressions, and mustered up their courage in the cheering gestures of the aunts and wives.

He slipped out from behind the table, walked straight to the commander in chief, took a cup of freshly brewed tea, and offered it to the commander in both hands: "I...I can also tell ghost stories."

The handsome stared at him: "..."

The senior executive shook his hand, and poured a cup of hot tea onto the handsome man's crotch.

The scene suddenly became lively, the aunts and wives yelled, and the high-level officials jumped on the spot.

The commander-in-chief had a ferocious expression on his face, he didn't bother to take the gun, he could only cover his crotch.

His crotch hurts.

hot.

The author has something to say:

The setting poems are basically all Guo Degang's...

Don't make up for the problem of appearance, just watch it for fun.

After all, the more brains, the more magical