young and inaction

"Xiaoxiu, Xiaoxiu?" Lin Jingtang was wearing a coat, standing at the door of Lin Xingxiu's room: "Xiaoxiu, daddy will take you to see mommy?" There was no light in the room, and the heavy curtains were tightly closed, Lin Xingxiu Sitting at the desk and drawing, Lin Jingtang never understood his son's paintings. He felt that they were Lin Xingxiu's own world.

The lights in the room were turned on, it was raining outside, the weather was gray and it was a bad mood.Lin Xingxiu paused for a moment, then looked up at Lin Jingtang vigilantly.

"Oh, Xiaoxiu, it's Dad." Lin Jingtang said with a smile, although he couldn't accept this reality during the few days when Lin Xingxiu was diagnosed with autism, he couldn't help it.

Lin Xingxiu glanced at him expressionlessly, put down his pen and waited for Lin Jingtang to speak, Lin Jingtang squatted in front of him, took out his mobile phone and found a photo: "Xiaoxiu, look, this is your brother, last night just came into this world."

The room was very quiet, Lin Jingtang exhaled lightly, and was about to say it again, when Lin Xingxiu's immature voice sounded: "He is not."

Lin Jingtang laughed, and said: "His name is Lin Yihang, you haven't seen him yet, look, your eyes are a bit alike." Of course, Lin Yihang doesn't have Lin Jingtang's genes in his body, and his eyes follow Zhang Rui's. of.

He looked directly at the photos on his mobile phone, and felt that his body wanted to be sucked into a time and space by the vortex. He grew up a little, standing at the gate of the familiar family courtyard, where he grew up.

He stood at the gate of the yard, and the rain did not catch him.Opposite was a stationery store, and he saw a familiar figure coming out of it.

Holding an umbrella, Lin Jingtang waved the notebook and a box of packed wontons.Lin Xingxiu felt that his heart was like a glass dropped to the ground, he remembered this.

The notebook was a birthday present from Lin Jingtang. Wonton is his favorite food. Today is his birthday.He looked at Lin Jingtang who was separated by a four-way road, tears rolled out of his eyes.

When the light turned green, Lin Jingtang didn't want his son to wait too long, so he trotted back. He suddenly stopped in the middle of the road, and took out his mobile phone. The umbrella blocked his sight. When the call was connected, he already felt that his mind was blank. The voice I've never heard before - Dad.

Lin Xingxiu rushed over, ignoring the traffic lights, and shouted with all his strength: Dad——

Life is like this, you think he is joking with you, but he is not, he just quietly takes away those people or things that you think are as light as a feather from your side.

The out-of-control truck crashed into the green belt on the side of the road. The driver staggered out of the car, as if he felt like he was dreaming. Why did the car suddenly lose control and pretend to be a person?

He stood aside, looking at a little boy, kneeling on the ground, clutching the arm of the man on the ground, crying loudly for him to go home.The cars on the road surrounded them in a circle. They watched the excitement, but no one thought of calling 120.

"Xiao... Hugh..." Lin Jingtang spoke out in distress, feeling the back of his head was very hot, and the rain was hitting his face very cold.Lin Xingxiu cried and nodded, "Let's go home. Go home..."

"Ha...Xiao, Xio...you, you call...my dad, dad..." Lin Jingtang touched Lin Xingxiu's face with his blood-stained hand.

Lin Xingxiu held it in his hand. He always felt that his father's hand was big and warm. As long as his father held him, he would not be afraid of the eyes of strangers.

"Father, let's go home? You still want to teach me how to write. Daddy, please go home?" Lin Xingxiu innocently pulled Lin Jingtang, he wanted to carry his father home.

Lin Jingtang felt uncomfortable breathing, and the pain spread all over his body. He caught a glimpse of rain and blood mixed together, and it turned out that the tenderness was the blood flowing from his head.

The people around realized the urgency of the situation, and a woman exclaimed: "Call 120 soon! Watching the excitement is no big deal!" The woman dialed 120, trying to take some emergency measures. When she walked in and took a look, she burst into tears. There was nothing she could do.

"Small... Hugh, Dad... want to go to sleep, you answer, promise Dad... for Dad, protect, protect, good mother, and... brother..." Lin Jingtang felt that his eyelids were heavy, he had never felt that So sleepy.

"Be...be a good person...but please, no, don't...fight again, don't cry, be good...be obedient..." Lin Jingtang's tears flowed out, but the corners of his mouth curled up, and he rubbed his thumb gently Lin Xingxiu's face.

Lin Xingxiu thought of beating up the child from the neighbor's house that day because the child scolded Lin Jingtang.As a result, the injury was serious, Lin Jingtang taught him a lesson, but he bit his lip and refused to tell his father why.

"I was wrong, Dad, I won't hit anyone again, can you go home with me? It's too cold here, go home and sleep." Lin Xingxiu said with a sob, he didn't hear what Lin Jingtang said.

The sound of an ambulance gradually came, and Lin Jingtang slowly closed his eyes.

For some reason, he fell into a cloud while crying, and someone called his name again. This voice made him miss it, and he thought it would become a thought.

"Lin Xingxiu?" The voice called again uncertainly, oh it was Lu Xichou calling him, but he was already dead, how could he hear Lu Xichou calling him?I must have missed him.

His throat was like a dry river in the dry season. There was not a single drop of water evaporated by the scorching sun. He was very thirsty, and his lips should have been parched.Lu Xichou called him again, but there was no sign of him on this cloud.

Where is Lu Xichou?The cloud is like a swamp, and he sinks a little bit with every step he takes.He frowned helplessly and looked at the sky, it was gray, his pupils suddenly dilated, as if he saw Lu Xichou.

When he rubbed his eyes and looked again, he couldn't see Lu Xichou's face clearly, he could only hear Lu Xichou calling his name: "Lin Xingxiu? Are you awake?"

He tried his best to see Lu Xichou's face clearly, but his eyes went dark for an instant, and his body fell like weightless. He couldn't catch anything until he landed on the "ground".

"Are you awake?" Lu Xichou was hoarse and exhausted, "Why are you so stupid?" The right hand was being infused, and the back of the hand was already a little purple.

Lin Xingxiu's head was wrapped with a bandage, his right leg was placed very high, his stomach hurt where he couldn't tell, but he had a severe headache, and the sound of medical equipment was "beeping" in the ward.

He moved the fingers of his right hand, it was uncomfortable to breathe while wearing an oxygen mask, he frowned and said, "I... am I not dead yet?" Lu Xichou stroked his bangs, but couldn't hear what he said, leaned over and said: " What did you say?"

"I, thirsty..." Lin Xingxiu looked at him and said, he thought he would never see Lu Xichou again.Lu Xichou kissed him on the forehead, poured a glass of water, and asked the nurse for a pack of cotton balls.

"Did you stay up all night doing the quizzes again? Why did you sleep for so long?" Lu Xichou changed the topic, dipped a cotton ball in the water, and carefully "feed" the water.

Lin Xingxiu stared at the ceiling without speaking.Since Lu Xichou is here, he may have seen that storage bag.

Seeing that he didn't speak, Lu Xichou took out a box of crunchy shark sandwiches from his bag, and waved it in front of his eyes: "New taste, I will reward you when you can walk on the ground."

"En." Lin Xingxiu said softly.

At this time, Lu Xichou was standing by his side, not his mother Zhang Rui. Although he didn't expect Zhang Rui to come, he dreamed of Lin Jingtang. He promised his father to take good care of his mother and younger brother, but he Didn't do it.

He didn't dare to look at Lu Xichou, this feeling of fear of meeting people's eyes had already given him a feeling of déjà vu.He didn't hear what Lu Xichou said, Lin Xingxiu felt that he was biased towards Lu Xichou.

He lied to Lu Xichou that he was not sick.

"I'll go see why the nurse hasn't come yet, wait for me later." Lu Xichou opened the door and left, he sighed, why didn't he die?It's better to die.

The door opened, and he held back his tears. It should not be Lu Xichou who came in, the footsteps were very chaotic.He didn't look back, his eyes kept looking at the treetops outside the window.

"Xiao Lin, right?" A strange female voice rang in his ears, "I am Chen Ning's mother." The woman spoke forcefully, as if she could not be refuted.

Lin Xingxiu looked back at her with difficulty. The woman was wearing formal clothes and a black beret on her head. The black veil on the hat covered half of her face.

"You don't need to talk, just listen to me." Chen Ning's mother said, "First of all, I apologize to you on behalf of Chen Ning, and secondly, I hope you can write a "Letter of Understanding", and I will bear your medical expenses. Let Chen Ning receive a letter of persuasion."

Why?He didn't know what to do, and even found it ridiculous and ridiculous.

"Why are you here?" Lu Xichou stood by the door and asked coldly, "Auntie has this time, why don't you go through the transfer procedures first." Chen Ning's mother nodded to Lin Xingxiu, turned and left.

The intern who was following Lu Xichou rolled his eyes: "Is being rich means being powerful? Visiting patients is dressed as if attending a dinner party." The doctor who took her coughed and signaled her not to talk nonsense.

"How is it? Does your head still hurt?" The doctor took the notebook and checked the equipment, "Don't worry, although it is multiple fractures, it has passed the difficulty."

Since the doctor asked about the headache, it was a concussion.

"Why haven't your parents come yet?" The doctor asked casually.Lu Xichou wanted to interject a sentence, but failed.

The intern helped him take off the oxygen mask, and said with a curled lip, "When you brought it in, your mobile phone couldn't be turned on. I contacted your school after seeing your school uniform. I haven't seen your parents for several days."

Lu Xichou observed Lin Xingxiu's expression, he really wanted to beat up the intern so that she could understand the dangers of society.

After the doctor and the intern went out, Lu Xichou took out an insulated lunch box from the cabinet and said, "Your mother is probably busy with work, so she hasn't come here. It's okay, isn't there me? Look, my mother made you soup. "

Lin Xingxiu looked at Lu Xichou blankly, did Lu Xichou's mother know?

Lu Xichou adjusted the bed to a suitable position to ensure that Lin Xingxiu was comfortable, then scooped up a spoonful of soup, blew on it, and handed it to Lin Xingxiu's mouth: "Ah, open your mouth."

This is a single ward with complete facilities, no one pays for his medical expenses, even if he is compensated by the driver, he can't live in such a good ward, so there is only one in the end, and it's all done by Lu Xichou alone.

Looking at Lu Xichou, he felt very uncomfortable. No one had ever treated him so well, including Fang Chuan. When he needed company most, Lu Xichou was with him.

He remembered that day, Lu Xichou said - just trust me.

"Do you think it's too light? Why are you disobedient?" Lu Xichou touched his forehead with his hand, "Drink the soup and then go to sleep, concussion, I understand." He joked with a serious face, trying to tease Lin Xing stop laughing.

Lin Xingxiu couldn't laugh anymore, he would only feel sadder and blame himself when he saw Lu Xichou like this, it would be great if he wasn't sick.

There were birds chirping outside the window. Lu Xichou put down the soup, took out his mobile phone, and put it in front of Lin Xingxiu: "Look, I got 12 in the monthly exam! Isn't it great? The so-called children can be taught, Mr. Lin, you have to hurry up Get better and give me extra lessons, it’s hard to get better.”

When he was a child, he watched his classmates get 100 points in the test, and showed the test papers to his parents. He was encouraged and rewarded by his parents. He wanted to do that at the time, but he couldn't do it, as if his body and mind couldn't coordinate.

How much Lu Xichou looked like the former child, Lin Xingxiu finally raised the corners of his mouth stiffly.

Seeing him smile, Lu Xichou secretly exhaled in his heart, picked up the soup, the temperature was moderate, he put the spoon next to Lin Xingxiu's mouth, and said: "I confessed to my parents, they now know that I like you. "

Just as Lin Xingxiu opened his mouth to drink it, he finally shook his head and said, "I'm not hungry, just drink some plain water." Lu Xichou gently tugged at his earlobe, "You want me to feed you?"

This "Hello" is not the other "Hello", he watched how Lu Xichou took a sip of the soup, and how he bent down to his mouth.Lin Xingxiu stretched out his right hand to block him, saying, "It's almost back to blood."

Lu Xichou swallowed quickly, and almost choked: "Fuck? Blame me, blame me, I'll go to the doctor right now." Lu Xichou rang the notification bell, but he was afraid that the nurse would not hear, so he went to find someone himself.

In fact, he just wanted to ask - what if I die?

Lu Xichou confessed to his parents, what if he died?But if he died, what would Lu Xichou do?Will his parents accept him?Do you think he is sick?

The nurse came before the last half of the infusion was over, and while admonishing Lu Xichou for being careless, she also arranged for Lin Xingxiu to pay attention to his diet.The moment the needle was pulled out was painful, but it was not as painful as when he cut his own wrist with a knife.

"Tsk, your hands are all purple." Lu Xichou took his hand and kissed the back of his hand lightly, "My heart hurts." Lin Xingxiu didn't want to see him since he woke up, he knew it well, that He did look at the storage bag, and found it hard to explain.

"Do you want to sleep again? I'll call you for dinner." Lu Xichou laid him flat and said, "When your ribs heal, I can push you to the garden behind to bask in the sun."

After lying down, Lin Xingxiu closed his eyes. Pretending to be asleep is a "skill" he took for granted. After Lu Xichou saw that his breathing was steady, he kissed him on the lips. With his eyes closed, he could hear Lu Xichou adjusting the temperature of the air conditioner. Gao, drew the curtains, and gently opened the door to leave.

Lin Xingxiu opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling, Lu Xichou's exhausted appearance appeared in his mind, tears soaked a corner of the quilt, he regretted meeting Lu Xichou now.

The author has something to say: "Spring Day" in the last chapter belongs to BTS.