River Breeze Night Sparrow

The empty house was a mess.

The table in the kitchen was overturned to the ground, and the dishes on the table were scattered all over the floor. Various soups flowed and mixed together, and together with the ups and downs of emotions, they were frozen by the cold and time, and finally became cold and sticky. semi-colloid.The overturned wooden bowls were knocked upside down one by one, while the empty glass was not so lucky. Like the shattered tears, it was torn apart and could not be put together again.

Only the cake, which has not yet been served, is still safe and sound on the marble kitchen board, and the "Happy Birthday" on it is particularly ironic.

The air was extremely quiet, as if there was an invisible black hole that absorbed all the sounds, and the noise just now was silently leaving an lingering sound in my mind.

The door was not closed, and it was not too much to open it with a large door.Jiang Yi entered the door with some hesitation, a little bit in his heart, and he was even more surprised when he witnessed the chaos.

Lin Qiu was lowering his eyes to light the candles on one side of the cake one by one. The small jumping flames reflected on his face. It was clearly a few beans of warm fire, but it reflected a bit of desolation and loneliness.

He saw Jiang Yi from the side, and smiled faintly.

"You came."

Jiang Yi saw Lin Qiu bent down and lightly blew out the candles he had just lit. His long eyelashes were like the wings of a black phoenix butterfly, half covering and half revealing the deep universe in his eyes.

"Did you meet anyone just now?" Lin Qiu asked.

"No." Jiang Yi was taken aback, only to realize that Su Xiaoya was no longer in the room.Presumably the culprit of this "disaster" has absconded.

Just now when he was driving, he saw a slightly low-key Buick here. Jiang Yi just glanced at it, thinking that the figure in the back seat should be Su Xiaoya.

Lin Qiu let out a "huh", remembering that Su Xiaoya wrapped her coat and scarf before going out, and picked up the suitcase that she might have prepared. She must have planned it for a long time, so she would definitely not sleep on the street, so she didn't plan to I care about it.

Su Xiaoya wants to go back to live in the school district room.

She had already fallen into the situation where the school persuaded her to leave. Lin Qiu didn't want her to fool around outside again, so she canceled the rent of the school district house.Su Xiaoya was furious when she found out, and the two had already quarreled about it once.

Su Xiaoya received a lot of couriers on her birthday, and there were many expensive luxury goods in them.Lin Qiu asked her where she got it from, and she said with a somewhat smug and provocative face, "I will follow my mother, so I have more friends."

Soutine's "friends" were all bugs, without exception.What's more, in Su Ting's eyes, she never regarded those people as friends. They were just a delicacy for blood leeches and a tool to achieve her goals.

When Lin Qiu heard this, she almost reached out to give Su Xiaoya a slap, but she stopped abruptly.

The provocative expression on Su Xiaoya's face deepened, even a little more mocking. "Fight, why don't you fight?"

Lin Qiu looked at her coldly and said, "Today is your birthday, I don't want to make too much trouble with you."

Su Ting said that Su Xiaoya likes strawberry cake the most, and would buy her a big or small piece for her birthday every year.

But this year, Su Xiaoya uttered her thoughts for the first time: "You know what? In fact, I never liked strawberry cake, but she likes it. Sometimes I can't tell whether she loves me or hates me." Me. She thinks it's miserable for me to have this mother, and she thinks that at least I still have someone to love, protect, and persuade, as if she wants to drag me to hell too."

Lin Qiu: "Then what do you like, you can tell me directly next time. Our communication can be more effective."

Su Xiaoya sneered: "Then why don't you ask me? You blame me for not communicating with you, so have you communicated with me properly?"

This sentence stopped Lin Qiu.Why not communicate with Su Xiaoya?

Because he didn't want to face this face?Because he doesn't know what to say?What kind of identity and posture should he speak with, the preaching of an elder, or the warning of a stranger?

Su Xiaoya propped her chin and asked Lin Qiu, "Which one do you think is worse, Su Ting or I?"

"Su Ting's life is like that, most of which she abused herself, but at least you are willing to help me out. As for me, none of my life is what I really want. In my wandering childhood, others Playing crazy, I followed my mother and called my father and uncle everywhere. Later, the crazy mother died, and there was one uncle who refused to talk to me. I also worried that he would suddenly go crazy one day. Sometimes I wonder , In fact, in this world, I have always been alone, no one is with me, and no one will be with me."

Lin Qiu looked at her quietly and said, "It's time to eat cake."

Su Xiaoya looked at him, her eyes were full of disappointment, she twitched the corners of her mouth, and shouted at him: "When will you listen to me seriously!"

"I made your favorite food, eat more later." At least it was Su Ting's favorite food that he mentioned, and he recorded it silently, but he didn't know if it belonged to Su Ting's self-talk again.

Lin Qiu lowered his eyes and began to arrange the dishes.

"Lin Qiu, can you stop being so indifferent to me? Su Ting is dead, can you stop treating me as her too!"

"Smile at me, okay? I know you want to be nice to me, but other than that, I want to hear you talk! I want to hear you talk to me! Can't we be normal family? Do you want to get along with me with this attitude of compensation? You obviously hate me, why do you still care about me? Then you take care of me! Listen to me!"

She shouted hysterically and incoherently, but Lin Qiu would only remain silent.With tears in her eyes, she yelled and overturned the table, as if so that her voice would not be the only one in the air.

"When I was with my mother, she would beat me and scold me. I hated her at that time. But I would rather go back to that time. At least she would hold me tightly when I slept. I felt the world I’m not the only one here. Lin Qiu, you’re as cold as ice, I’d rather go outside and freeze to death.”

She wiped away the tears on her cheeks with her arms, and left without looking back.

Jiang Yi came out of the packed kitchen with two cups of hot coffee in his hand.

He put a cup by Lin Qiu's hand, and said, "I added milk, but no sugar." Lin Qiu didn't like adding sugar, but Jiang Yi couldn't bear it too much.

Lin Qiu paused, and said, "Thank you." He stroked the rim of the ceramic cup and exhaled lightly.

Jiang Yi saw Lin Qiu silently in a daze, and was at a loss for a moment.

Lin Qiu suddenly said softly: "Beauty and poverty are often very unfortunate gifts."

Jiang Yi's heart skipped a beat.

Lin Qiu looked over slowly, with a slight smile on his lips. "Balzac."

"Where do we start? Perhaps, let's start with Su Ting."

Su Ting is the prettiest little girl in the village. She is beautiful, lively and clever. When I was 11 years old, someone came to my door to propose marriage.

"There are too many people who want to take Su Ting as their own. She is like a precious pearl left behind in the world. Everyone who discovers her stares at her beauty. But she is also too fragile. Our Time can only live in thatched huts, and there is no barrier between the cruel world."

That was the first hot summer that Lin Qiu had an impression of in his life.The sound of cicadas is painful, the leaves are curled up under the scorching, the concrete floor of the street whitened by the sun is potholed, and the bicycles of pedestrians bump and pass by in their eyes, making frowning noises.

The two children who wanted to eat popsicles on a whim finally arrived at the town after walking for half a day, where they were dying in the shade under the scorching sun.They stared at the popsicle in the hands of the little town boy like hungry wolves staring at raw meat.

Two dimes were tightly clutched in their sweaty palms, but a popsicle cost fifty cents.The old man who was guarding the popsicle box had already chased them away once, and said viciously, "What are you doing without money? If you mess around again, I'll beat you!"

Seeing his longing and timid gaze, Su Ting gritted her teeth and said, "Wait, I'll definitely get one for you." She jumped out and caught an older kid who looked very rich.

When the young Lin Qiu looked at the fat boy with big ears and looked at Su Ting and smiled, he only thought of one adjective: evil.

But before Lin Qiu could react, the boy touched Su Ting's thigh under the skirt, smiled and took out a dollar from his pocket.

Su Ting came back with two popsicles, his eyes were shining brightly, revealing a row of white teeth, he licked the popsicles with his pink tongue, and sighed comfortably and proudly. "too delicious!"

Lin Qiu was so angry, he didn't want the things exchanged in this way, he felt dirty.

But Su Ting glared at Lin Qiu and said, "He touched it all, don't let it fall! It's delicious! Otherwise, wouldn't my sacrifice be in vain?"

She rolled her eyes and said with a smile: "If you don't like me like this, you can earn more money for me to spend in the future, so that my sister will not have to depend on others and look at other people's faces in the future!"

The taste of that popsicle was very sweet, so Lin Qiu knew that the taste of humiliation was the taste of sweet popsicles.

Su Ting has always been good at making use of her beauty. She regards her beauty as the chicken that lays the golden eggs in the fable.That seems to be the contract she made with the devil, she was born here, and she is destined to die here in the future.

"Su Ting had a hard life. I know. So she is very obsessed with money, which I understand. I just regret that I was so incompetent and weak back then."

Lin Qiu, who was caught in memories, had a deep pain in his expression.He hated Su Ting, but this hatred also pointed to himself.He hated himself for not being able to pull Su Ting ashore, and hated himself for being in a quagmire.

"I don't have any other wishes, but I don't want Su Xiaoya to go down that road."

"It's not that I don't like Xiaoya, I just don't know how to get along with her. She is just like her mother, beautiful, intelligent, stubborn, and indifferent. She regards beauty as a weapon, sharper than her mother. I have been hurt by Su Ting too many times, as if I have sequelae, I resist her."

"But I really don't want her to be like her mother."

"She suddenly appeared beside me like this. I don't know what she looked like when she was a child, but she looked so innocent and cute even in her teens. When Ting ran carefree on the hillside. We looked at the blue sky, the orchards all over the mountains, and had endless imaginations about the future, and we didn't have the slightest suspicion or estrangement towards each other. At that time, we were relatives, real loved ones."

"Many people are tired of the process of raising a child. They always think that it would be great if the child can grow up all at once, so that they can communicate when they are sensible. However, I would rather work hard to raise a child and watch them fall to the ground. From babbling, to how to say the first sentence, read the first book, write the first article... I want to participate in their growth, to help them become a happier person. Or, at least to see How they became what they are now can be traced when they feel strange."

In Lin Qiu's eyes, sometimes Su Xiaoya is like a fragile baby, and he doesn't know how to take better care of her; but sometimes, she seems to be a collection of all Su Ting's "evil", a schemer full of evil .She can understand how to control people's hearts without fumbling, and use others without scruples. She doesn't care about other people's feelings, but only cares about her own goals.

Lin Qiu's tone was dejected and cold. "I feel that I have failed. When Su Ting was alive, I only thought about settling accounts with her for so many years in my life, and neglected getting along with Xiaoya; after Su Ting passed away, I suddenly realized that Xiaoya had grown up What kind of stand should I take to get along with her? But before I figured it out, it was already too late."

Su Xiaoya is no longer an unformed clay sculpture a few years ago. She has glazed and fired herself after the mother who gave her the prototype without being noticed by others, and has become the best successor.

But Lin Qiu, who has been drowning in Su Ting's swamp, has other concerns.

"Jiang Yi, sometimes I feel that I am really indifferent. Su Xiaoya keeps saying that I don't want to communicate with her, that I don't want to care about her. Yes, I think I should give her more care, but, I I always find it hard to push her away. I... I am an ominous person, and Su Ting’s injustice can be blamed on me. My concern, my closeness, to Xiaoya, why? Could it be poison?"

Jiang Yi, who had been silently watching Lin Qiu, felt worried when he saw Lin Qiu clenched his cup tightly in pain.

"Lin Qiu, your love and warmth are definitely not worth mentioning. It is the best elixir in the world, and the person you care about and care about is the happiest person in the world."

Jiang Yi's voice was firm, like a blanket that surrounded Lin Qiu's fragility.

Lin Qiu raised his eyes, looked at the man beside him and said softly, "Jiang Yi, sometimes I envy you. When it comes to hugging others, you seem to be so...so talented."

Jiang Yi's heart dropped heavily, but in Lin Qiu's eyes, it fell from the sky to a lake.The sound of splashing water was clear and joyful, but then a silence ushered in, transforming into a kind of cautious bewilderment.Lin Qiu's face was too quiet, and Jiang Yi's heartbeat would be exposed if he was not careful.

He looked at Lin Qiu and sighed softly, with a bit of helplessness in his smile, but more of a radiant gentleness, and said: "Mr. Lin, people will be amazed when they see the waves of the sea, and they will yearn for it when they see the vast sea of ​​clouds. me too."

Looking into Jiang Yi's eyes, Lin Qiu suddenly stopped breathing for a moment, wrapped in an unprecedented special feeling.He was dizzy, but clear and peaceful, his cosmic wasteland began to vibrate, but began to reshape.

Jiang Yi looked at him and said slowly: "I'm not talented, I just can't help it."