paranoid beauty

I am Zhou Yi, from childhood to adulthood, the brothers around me say that I am a very stable person.

Actually, I thought so too, until I met Xin Zhao.

The first time I met him was at the beginning of the first year of high school. I got up late because I was playing games with my brothers the day before, and I was late when I signed up. Only our class and class 2 were left.

I was carrying the suitcase, and when I opened the door, I saw a pair of beautiful eyes, the eyes were gentle and watery, which made people think of the misty misty rain in the Jiangnan water town.

It's really beautiful, too beautiful to look like it grew on a boy.

I was dumbfounded at the time, I thought he was the younger sister of a certain roommate, so I smiled at him and asked him carelessly: "This is the boys' dormitory, how did you get here?"

He froze for a moment, his fair cheeks flushed instantly, he stared at me with wide eyes, hesitating for a long time before saying that he was also a boy.

He is also gentle when speaking.

boy?

That was too pretty.

I don’t think he has the slightest masculinity, but he is not in the same class after all, and he seems to be a little timid, and it can scare him when he talks. I don’t like this kind of person, he looks too fragile. So after a month or two, neither of us got to know each other well.

Our dormitory is a mixed dormitory, and it is a coincidence that there are only two of us in the dormitory.

I often go out to Internet cafes with my brothers all night, and rarely spend the night in the dormitory, which is a bit less embarrassing.

It wasn't until after the midterm exam that my opponent in junior high school came to me for an appointment because he was too busy to do anything.

It's just that I didn't expect that this group of turtle grandsons were so desperate, and they used knives during the fight. I was blocked by a brother who was very close, and I got a long cut on my arm.

To be honest, it kind of hurts.

Originally, I was planning to find a cheaper clinic to get medicine after the fight, but I didn't know which turtle grandson came out to fight without thinking, so I called the police directly.

Brother dragged me and ran, we ran back to school directly, the goddamn Jindu came in, I didn't bother to go out to get medicine, and it wasn't a big wound, so I went back to the dormitory bearing the injury.

When he arrived at the dormitory, he was still awake, and he turned on the desk lamp and looked in the mirror, wondering what he was doing. I wasn't that curious, so I took one look at him and went to bed.

In the middle of the night, my arm hurt badly, but there was no medicine in my dormitory, and I was too lazy to get up, so I just lay on the bed without moving.

He is good-looking and soft-hearted. He probably smelled blood. I didn't move, but he got up and gave me medicine.

Cool.

While he was not paying attention, I secretly opened my eyes and looked at him twice.

His eyes are so beautiful and so gentle, I...

At that time, I suddenly remembered my mother.

I fell asleep after thinking about it, but he stayed by my side all the time. When I woke up the next day, I saw him lying beside my bed.

My grades are not good, so I can’t describe how I felt at that time, but since then, I will take care of him consciously or unconsciously, bring him breakfast, and unconsciously look for him in the crowd during exercises and meetings .

This is like?

I do not know.

But one time when I was a senior, my brother got a plate that was not available in the market, and invited us to go to his house to look at it.

When I was free, I went. I didn't know what this "disc not available in the market" was until he turned on the TV.

——Damn it, eighteen bans!

And it's fucking two dudes.

I know very clearly that I am not gay. When I watch pornography/films, I also have feelings for the girls' bodies in them.

Some of the brothers who came with me screamed in shock, some blushed, but I was the calmest.

I followed the TV to watch it, and the expression on the inside seemed to be in pain but not in pain. For no reason, I brought Xin Zhao's face into it.

When I left, I was very calm on the surface, but only I knew that I really wanted to see him.

I went back to the dormitory, and when he arrived, he didn't know what he was doing, and when he saw me coming back, he panicked and stuffed everything on the desktop into the drawer.

I was very surprised and asked what he was doing.

He glared at me with a red face and asked me what was wrong with me.

OK, none of my business.

Gee.

When he said that, his lips were very red and shiny, like a girl's lipstick.

I didn't dare to look at him, cleaned myself up twice and went to bed.

I haven't had insomnia for more than ten years since I was born. That night, I just couldn't sleep.

I fell asleep when it was about to dawn, but I dreamed of him, he was under me, his beautiful eyes were full of water vapor, biting his red lips and crying.

When I woke up, I couldn't even look at him.

Damn, it's so embarrassing.

I thought, if this high school goes on like this, I will confess my love to him when I graduate from high school. As for why I have to wait until I graduate from high school?

I'm so rubbish, he still has a good future, he should study hard and be a good student.

I can't disturb his study.

But I didn't expect that we gradually became more acquainted, and I seemed to find that he had someone he liked.

That person was called Su Bei.

... Subei, who in the school doesn't know?

Before we even entered this school, he was already the god of learning in the school, and his fucking looks were okay, even when he usually gave a speech on stage, the group of boys and girls below were very excited.

...It turns out that he likes this type.

That's right, I'm a piece of trash, do I deserve to be obsessed with him?

Conscience of heaven and earth, I am indeed not very happy, but I still want to hope that he can live well.

Su Bei, I can't get used to him, but I know he's a good guy, he's got good grades and he's handsome. But I haven't heard anyone scolding him.

Of course, it's also possible that he didn't dare. After all, I heard that his family still has money in Subei.

worthy of him.

So, I decided to break up with him.

But I'm really not feeling well, and maybe I'm just idle, and I took a group of brothers to drink, as expected, I got drunk.

The brothers should have seen that I was in a bad mood, but they didn't know why, so they sent me back to the dormitory and asked Xin Zhao to take care of me before leaving.

I laughed angrily on the spot.

Damn these idiots!

Maybe it's because of alcohol, but when I fucking see him, I think of the movie I watched at my brother's house.

...I'm really nothing.

He helped me walk into the dormitory and let me sit on a chair.

Really, I think I just drank too much, so I pulled him and pressed him into my arms, and I was not satisfied, so I pressed him and kissed him.

Damn, it's really soft.

The person I like, why...

so good?

He may have been stunned, like a rabbit, motionless in my arms.

I swell it.

I think I should be inflated.

I hugged him tightly, gritted my teeth and said, "I like you."

I said repeatedly: "I, I fucking like you, I like you so much, I really like you so much..."

But even when I'm drunk, I'm an asshole.

Who the hell knows?

I, Zhou Yi, dare not call his name when I confess.

He put me back on the bed, I don't know if he understood my confession, because the next day his attitude towards me was the same as before.

In fact, I regret it to death.

He doesn't even like me, and it would bother him if I confessed.

My relationship with him has gradually become closer. As I said before, he is a very timid person and has no particularly close friends.

Ha, from this point of view, I am actually his only one.

I'm happy.

But after a while, I didn't feel so good.

He really regarded me as his best friend, he told me everything, and finally one day, he told me that he liked Subei.

……Oh.

What are you talking about? It's not like I don't know.

I was laying in bed with my phone when I heard it, and I fucking wanted to smash it.

Oh shit.

But he had a nice smile.

...I'm a coward, so I also smiled and listened to him.

It may be that God has pity on my trash, but I finally discovered the imperfection in him.

——He actually likes women's clothing.

He is also amazing, and he hides so tightly.

If it wasn't for that time when my brother chased girls and insisted on dragging me to those comic exhibitions, maybe I wouldn't have discovered it until I graduated.

He is really beautiful, even more beautiful in women's clothing.

If I hadn't been with this kid for so long, I wouldn't fucking recognize him!

Out of nowhere, I was so excited.

I'm a piece of shit and he's too good to be good enough for him.

But now, he has a stain.

In fact, I also know that I am very funny. I know that I just like women's clothing and girls' things. How can this be regarded as a stain.

But I told myself, no, this can only be a stain.

If... Otherwise, how can I, a piece of trash like me, be worthy of him?

So I stared at him obscenely and took many photos, even photos of him secretly changing clothes.

What a fucking pervert I am.

But very cool.

I was so excited that my hands were shaking.

The second I returned to the dormitory, I couldn't help showing him the photos, and I told him to send them all.

Sure enough, his face turned pale immediately.

Ha, why are you so stupid.

I said that I like him, how could it be possible to show such a beautiful photo of him to others.

He also cried, begging me while crying.

In fact, my fucking heart has already softened, after all, I like him so much.

But no, if I, a piece of trash, don't seize this opportunity, I won't be able to have him.

I told him that if I dated with me for a month, I would pretend that I didn't know about it.

Hahahahahaha.

a month?

I fucking wanted to say that I was crazy for a year, but when he cried, I couldn't stand it, so I changed my words directly.

He is still crying.

Damn, I almost blurted out, not at all.

I'm not good enough for you, I know I'm not good enough for you...

But you can't be my boyfriend forever?

I will hold you in my heart, and I can spoil you as much as I spoil my son.

But this idiot was crying with tears all over his face, and he just didn't agree.

I don't want to talk to him anymore.

Isn't it just one month?I treat him openly and aboveboard as a boyfriend, isn't this what he has earned?

...Oh, I almost forgot, he likes Su Bei.

So, the reason why he didn't agree to me was because he wanted to leave his first love to Su Bei?

Oh shit.

It's also a coincidence that once when I was chatting with him, I met Su Bei who was in the third year of high school.

I almost fucking laughed out loud at the time.

Great! !

There is an extra boy next to Su Bei, and he is too pretty.

How about that kind of beauty?In my mind, he is as beautiful as him.

If I'm not happy just because I'm pretty, hahaha!The key is Su Bei's aggressive attitude towards boys!

Damn it, I'm a guy, I fucking knew it when I saw his eyes, fucking Su Bei was definitely interested in that boy! !

This is fucking great!

God, what kind of fairy are you! !

If Su Bei gets married with that boy, I don't believe that idiot Xin Zhao can still like him.

Xin Zhao doesn't like him anymore, so isn't he mine? ! !

But not enough, he is too clean.

What should I do with this garbage?

I don't know if God is helping me. When I quarreled with him again, he might have been in a bad mood and made a big fuss, smashing things in the dormitory.

Row.

He made a fuss by himself.

How can I not cooperate with him?

I just fucking flipped his desk and turned all his cosmetics out.

What a fucking pervert I am.

On the surface, I asked him if he was a monster, but in my heart I was so excited that I was almost stoned! !

I stained him.

He has a crush on me.

He ran out crying, but I didn't expect that the boy Su Bei liked would follow him.

Oh, that boy's name is Jiang Huai.

I've seen him from a distance a few times since then, boy?

Hahahaha, I didn't expect Su Bei to be mistaken, how could this guy be a good student?

Looking at him like that, he might have fought more than me!

But it's none of my business, I wish he and Su Bei could be together!

I would like to see if this idiot, Xin Zhao, still likes Su Bei? !

What I didn't expect was that later on, Subei and Jianghuai became obvious, and he actually posted a post saying that Jianghuai was sick.

When I knew it, I couldn't believe it, but when I saw him crying, I couldn't help it. I felt sorry for him.

He cries that he is a monster.

I hugged him and kissed his hair.

Oh shit.

Monsters and garbage, isn't this a perfect match? !

He is mine now.

After that incident, he was unhappy all day long. When the third year of high school was about to start, he told me that he wanted to transfer schools.

I was fucking startled and wondered for a moment if I had scared him.

But fortunately, he asked me later if I still like him.

Fuck, isn't this fucking nonsense!

He told me again, let me stay with him.

Oh shit!

What kind of shit luck is this? ! !

Of course I said yes, I like him.

Although I know that I am a trash, I also vaguely know that he doesn't like me. I don't want to and dare not think about why he chooses to be with me.

...At least he's mine! !

But, it may be that I have not really experienced the beatings of the society, and I am too happy.

I've been with him for a semester, and it's crystal clear every moment that he doesn't like me.

He still likes Subei.

Fine.

Row.

There are so many couples in the world who have no relationship basis, others can live like this, why can't I?

I like him so much.

He started to show his temper in front of me, we are not in the same school, he asked me to get up in the middle of the night to buy him breakfast, I did it without saying anything.

He wanted to wear a nice dress and I spent my savings to buy it for him.

As long as he says a word, I can drop a thousand brothers and come to him immediately.

Seriously, if I could pick the stars, I would be willing to go too.

I like him so much.

But he was not happy.

He is not happy no matter what I do.

How can you be unhappy?

I dote on him so much.

... Of course, I will not admit that he still likes others.

He is so stupid.

Isn't it obvious?Jianghuai himself didn't take him to heart about the incident on the forum, so isn't it obvious who did it?

Ha, he wouldn't naively think that it was really the forum's inexplicable smoking, would he?

Every time I think about this, I think, how could I see him crying that time, so my heart softened and I didn't make it to the end.

I fucking did it!I kissed his neck, which was white, warm, soft, and tender.

Fragrant and soft.

Why not continue?

Oh shit.

Am I not a pervert?

...But for the past six months, I have been so tired.

Perverts get tired too?

Fuck.

Really tired.

But I told myself, forget it, so what if he likes Subei?Isn't he still mine?

That dude in northern Jiangsu is in his third year of high school, and he's about to graduate in his last semester, so I can't fucking believe he'll still be able to see him!

Oh shit.

I really didn't expect it, but I actually saw it.

Outside the library, they looked like they had passed the college entrance examination, and Su Bei's little boyfriend was hanging on Su Bei's body, so close.

God knows, I'm too jealous.

I'm with Xin Zhao and I haven't fucking hugged him!

Damn...damn.

This idiot Xin Zhao's body was stiff, and I looked at him with red eyes.

cried again.

I held his hand tightly, trying to coax him, but I had no strength left.

Oh shit.

I'm sick of it.

I don't know what they said again, anyway, Xin Zhao was completely ignored by the two of them.

To be honest, I was in a good mood at the time.

I couldn't be happier.

Xin Zhao, take a fucking look, the person you like doesn't care about you at all! !

However, I heard Xin Zhao's hoarse cry again, he cried while shouting: "Su Bei, I like you."

I just don't know what to say.

Su Bei and his little boyfriend left, but he was still crying.

How much I fucking miss him is how much I fucking love him.

I want to coax him.

But how to coax it?

Tell him don't like Su Bei anymore, can you like me for a while?

I really fucking want to ask if it's okay.

And I'm so tired.

I swear by my conscience, although I have tricked him, but in the past six months of being together, I have definitely treated him wholeheartedly.

I fucking want to give him my heart.

...Oh, I suddenly remembered a sentence I saw on the Internet before: Don't dig out your heart and lungs for people, some people don't eat offal.

Makes sense.

so tired.

……or.

forget it.

Forget it really.

He's so nice, I'm a piece of trash, shouldn't he dislike me?

too tired.

Oh shit.

It is more suitable for me to go to Internet cafes with my brothers.

My brother called me yesterday and asked me to go with him.

Then I'm leaving.

Xin Zhao, I don't want you anymore.

作者有话要说：感谢在2021-03-1217:58:51~2021-03-1316:13:10期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~

Thanks to the little angel who cast the rocket launcher: 1 Ha Shiqi;

Thanks to the little angel who threw the mine: stupid, want to an1;

Thanks to the little angel of irrigation nutrient solution: 4275110430 bottles; I want green Mingmingzi, I don’t like coriander e, 5 bottles of dsj; 2 bottles of Zi.; 1 bottle of Guwang; thank you very much for your support, I will continue Work hard!