oops my coward

"Are you going to take an exam? I wish you all the best." The cats in the cat cafe are also on summer vacation, and the proprietress smiled and waved to us, and the cats beside them were either sitting or lying down, lazily.

I smiled back, and after walking out the door, I reached out and patted Shi Chuan on the back: "Have you been waiting?"

"No, I'm looking at my phone." He rubbed his head.Today is my last day of work before the holiday, and he came here specially to go to the library with me when I am free.After all, cat cafes are not a suitable place to study. Those cats meowing softly can easily escape the guilt of scratching the pages of the book, and everyone is happy with it.

After that, I stayed in the library until late at night. I was a little tired, and I pinched the bridge of my nose trying to wake up.Seeing this, Shi Chuan immediately took out two cans of drinks from his bag, and asked softly, "Would you like to drink?" It seems that he bought them in a shopping mall by chance, and they are no longer iced after so long.He also realized this, and explained stupidly: "I, I thought it was too cold, it would be bad for my health..."

"It's good, let's drink it on the way." I took the thing and felt the temperature he had left on the can wall just now, and the fatigue in my heart seemed to be relieved, "Thank you."

Ishikawa breathed a sigh of relief.

I walked side by side with him and found that there were too many people waiting in front of the elevator, so I simply walked around to the stairs on the other side and walked down slowly.There are relatively few people here, it is very quiet, and you can hear an echo when you talk: "...I won't be able to drink this in summer vacation, and my house sells another brand." I took a sip of the drink that is said to be a local specialty , took the opportunity to mention the holiday arrangements.

As I wished, Ishikawa frowned and said, "You, are you going home?" Then he reacted and changed his words, "No, I just asked casually, I thought you stayed here like before. "Indeed, there was no one at home last summer, and I was free when I went back, so I stayed at school to work part-time, and occasionally went to the basketball court to enjoy my hands.Hearing what he said, could it be that he often came to see me before?That's why you know my movements like the palm of your hand?

I didn't expose this, and curled my mouth: "My mother is here this year, so I have to go see her." In fact, my relationship with her is not that good. As a photographer who runs around, she rarely stays at home. It's just that this time there was a reason why I had to come back, so I called me home.

I could sense that Ishikawa was very curious about my family's situation, but it was hard to ask, so I murmured, "Are you taking the high-speed rail?"

"Yeah, we'll be there in just over an hour." I took the opportunity to reveal where my home was, and then changed the subject, "What about you?"

He pulled me to avoid people passing by on bicycles. The campus is rather dark at night, especially on both sides of the trail leading from the library. There are few street lights on both sides, making it difficult for people to see the surroundings clearly: "I live here alone. My brother comes here occasionally. But he is very busy and often travels on business." But he didn't mention more.

Not feeling disappointed, I agreed, and then took the opportunity to throw out what I really wanted to say: "It's okay, I may go back to school early, and then I will go to play with you?" Walking anywhere is like a date.Besides, people say that Xiaobie is better than a newlywed, and if we don't see each other for a while, he will definitely miss me, right?Anyway, I can't bear the loneliness, and I will definitely return to school early.

"Okay!" Only then did he show some joy, and Ishikawa nodded again and again, like a smoothed cat shaking its fluffy head, trying to rub the owner's palm.

……

After the last subject of the exam, it was already evening, and the sky, which had been gloomy for a long time, unexpectedly turned into a bright red sunset. This scene made many people who came out of the exam room stop and look from afar.I couldn't help but took out my phone and took a picture, including Ishikawa who raised his head without showing any trace.

He suddenly turned his face and asked me through the camera: "Are you leaving today?"

"Well, the car at night, I just got supper when I got home." My mother bought the ticket, otherwise I wouldn't have left so early.

Ishikawa sighed lightly, thinking that I hadn't noticed, scratched his head: "I'll take you to the station." After a while, he added, "The luggage is heavy, I can help you carry it."

Although shorter than him, I am a grown male around 1.8 meters in length, and it doesn't take much effort to drag one or two suitcases.However, when I met his anxious and reluctant eyes, my heart beat faster, coughed a few times, and pretended to calmly agree: "Okay." In fact, Chen Jiaming would be very happy to be a coolie, if I asked if.

But brother and partner can only choose one, of course I don't hesitate to choose the latter.

Therefore, when I went back to the dormitory to pack my luggage, Chen Jiaming stood on one side with a heavy face, as if watching the newly grown cabbage being kicked off before it could be taken away.I hid the trace of guilt in my heart, pulled the suitcase out with a bright smile, and was picked up by the person guarding outside before I walked a few steps.So the smile on my face deepened: "Let's go." Hurry up so that the guy in the room doesn't get mad—this year Chen Jiaming stayed for an internship, but he learned that the handsome big boss was on a business trip, and he heard that I was going to leave him , I am depressed about guarding the dormitory alone.

It takes about half an hour to take the subway from the school to the high-speed rail station. Ishikawa bravely opened the way ahead with his suitcase, and I followed behind with a turbulent mood, and successfully boarded the evening rush hour subway.Although this is a bit of a reversal of my imagined identity, the result is always good. At least now I enjoy the feeling of being cared for, which is nice.

The subway stopped at the station halfway, and not many people went down, but a lot of people crowded up, and the surrounding gradually became crowded.Relying on his size, Shi Chuan stretched his arms around me in the corner, and turned his back to the raging crowd: "Stand firm."

I stared at his chest so closely that I almost touched the tip of my nose.Damn, I was so happy that I was about to ascend to the sky, and it took me a long time to come back to my senses: "Haha, okay, I'm standing up, and you should be careful not to be squeezed."

Today's evening peak was awesome!

When I arrived at the high-speed railway station, I found that there were more people, and I was not willing to let Shi Chuan squeeze in, so I quickly told him to turn around and go back.Not long after this guy was stubborn, he was called "A Chuan" and "A Chuan" until his ears turned red, and he left with a look of ecstasy.I watched his back through the turbulent crowd and was stunned for a while before ending this meaningless idol drama plot.

I think he should like me a little bit, right?

This doubt lingered in my heart until I arrived at the destination, and it was washed away by other things, leaving me with a sense of loss.My mother, Ms. Bai, just cooked a pot of soup when I opened the door, and the aroma was pervasive. "I'm back." She came over and looked me up and down with a flat expression, "I cleaned the room."

I breathed a sigh of relief: "Well, thank you, Mom."

Ms. Bai nodded slightly, then went back to the kitchen, and it took a long time before she called me out for dinner.Some time ago, she went to Europe and brought back a bottle of some vintage wine, she drank it herself and poured a small glass for me to taste.I glanced at the third wine glass on the table, which was filled with a purple-red liquid, which looked even more beautiful under the light: "The fruity aroma is so strong."

"Your mother likes it." Ms. Bai raised her eyebrows.

The meal was peaceful and casual, which was pleasant enough, anyway, and I offered to help her wash the dishes afterwards, and then moved the full glass of wine to the photo in the living room.Ms. Bai reminded: "There are grapes in the refrigerator, you can eat some, and leave the rest to your mother."

"Ah."

I went back to the house with a small basket of grapes, placed them on the small folding table next to the bed, then climbed into bed, and texted Ishikawa while eating.He also just had a meal, and he also sent a picture of Ke Ke facing the cat food indifferently: "It doesn't like the newly bought brand."

"Hahaha, I'll change it back another day." I bit the grapes and squinted my eyes because of the sweetness, "I eat fruit after eating."

Ishikawa asked what breed it was, and then said that he would buy it and try it, but cats couldn't eat it.

I replied exaggeratedly: "We help it eat up."

Ishikawa 1.9 meters: Coco kicked the cat food over.

Ishikawa 1.9 meters: I will cook cat food.

Me: Can you still cook?

Ishikawa 1.9m: Cat Rice.

Ishikawa 1.9m: The easiest, cut everything and cook it.

Ishikawa 1.9 meters: Nothing else.

Me: I'm not very good at this.

Me: Home cooking.

Me: No problem.

Ishikawa 1.9 meters: It's amazing.

We were chatting about uninspiring topics, and before I knew it, I suddenly heard the door opening from behind. It was Ms. Bai: "Are you free?"

"I'm chatting with my friend, wait a few minutes." I said to her.

Ms. Bai understood, and closed the door again.After a few minutes, I ended my conversation with Ishikawa before going out to find her: "What's wrong?"

She flipped through the photo album at home, and put in the photos she took in a small town in Europe some time ago: "I will visit your mother in a few days. If you want to buy her something, remember to prepare it early."

I thought for a while: "Okay. You can get the wine and go on your wedding anniversary."

"I brought several bottles back, and I'm still keeping the best ones." Ms. Bai looked up at me, through the lens, it was hard for me to see the emotion in her eyes, "You... rest early at night."

"Understood." I hesitated for a moment, then stepped forward and hugged her weakly, then turned and went back to the room.

A few days later, Ms. Bai and I took a car to the outskirts of the city, carrying wine, fruit, and some photos that Ms. Bai was going to burn as gifts.In fact, I don’t quite remember the appearance of my other mother. Her surname is Meng. It is said that she is a gentle woman. She was forced by her family to undergo surgery to conceive me.At the beginning, she and Ms. Bai also encountered many difficulties and pains in order to be together.

Later she got sick, and I went to the hospital several times. At that time, her face was very pale, and her body hidden under the quilt was like a fluttering butterfly.But on the tombstone, the photos of her when she was young are clearly very youthful and beautiful. No wonder Ms. Bai has been guarding her for so many years and never thought of finding another partner.

Ms. Bai loves Ms. Meng very much, and even I like Ms. Meng's looks more like that unknown man, but after all, I can't get over the hurdles in my heart, so the relationship between our mother and child is still not strong enough.She stared fixedly at the ashes that were still warm on the ground, and suddenly asked, "Do you have someone you like?"

I was taken aback: "Why do you ask that?"

"Didn't you chat with that person a few nights ago?" Ms. Bai said casually, "Male or female?"

"Man." I admitted.

Ms. Bai laughed: "Didn't you call yourself a straight man in the past?"

I also felt a little more relaxed: "I didn't have the courage when I was young, but I figured it out when I grew up." After meeting Ishikawa, I asked myself. To spring flowers, summer rain.And gradually, I realized that the influence of the two mothers on me was not sexual, and that timidity was groundless-I might not encounter the hardships that Ms. Meng has suffered; Ms. Bai is an open-minded person, not There will be worries about "I didn't teach my son well".

In short, after Ms. Bai asked this question, she stopped talking and looked at Ms. Meng in the photo with tender eyes.

I quietly held an umbrella for her. It was raining lightly, and maybe I would see a rainbow when the sky cleared.