On the Feasibility of Lei Wen Become a God

When Lei Zhe came out of the shower, Mr. Housekeeper had been there for a long time, holding a light helmet in his left hand and a cosmetic box in his right hand.

"Wait... that armor doesn't seem to be mine, does it?" Lei Zhe frowned and looked at the armor. The quality of the armor was obviously much worse than what he used in the past. There were many scratches on it, and there was an exaggerated hole in the abdomen.

The steward handed over the armor with a smile: "This old slave specially found it from the guards, please try to see if you can put it on."

"Although I can understand what you mean by doing this, I really don't want to wear other people's old clothes, and the armor is the same." Lei Ze Pampered Flores took two steps back, and his resistance was obvious: "Who You know what kind of dirt is on it. And the armor is heavy and uncomfortable to wear, so there is no other choice?"

"Young master, don't worry, I have had this armor washed carefully, and there is absolutely no dirt. Please bear with me for a while." The butler approached and handed the armor to Lei Zhe again.

"I don't know how to wear it." Lei Zhe pouted and insisted: "Why don't you just splash blood on the armor, it's too fake. If those veterans in the referee see it, they will die of laughter."

"That's right, we'll die laughing." A voice suddenly interjected.

Lei Zhe was startled, and turned to look at the window: "Morris, why are you here?"

"Anyway, I don't need to show up for this scene, so I'll stop by to see how you're getting ready." Morris jumped off the windowsill and sat directly on the desk.

The butler Alman couldn't help but frown. Morris really came from a commoner, which is really vulgar.

"What do you think I should wear?" Lei Zhe looked at Morris.

"Wear five or six layers of thin clothes." Morris replied with a smile.

"Why?" Lei Zhe asked confused.

"That way, when you go to prison, you won't be afraid of your clothes getting dirty, and you can throw away any dirty clothes." Morris said seriously.

"...Actually, are you being sarcastic? Isn't that right?" Lei Zhe gritted his teeth and retorted angrily, "It's not that I can't suffer, I just try to make myself as comfortable as possible within the limits of conditions."

Morris raised his eyebrows: "Tsk, nobleman."

Alman curled his lips indiscriminately. He heard that Morris was quite disrespectful to the nobles, but he didn't expect to be so rude.

Lei Zhe decided to ignore the angry youth, turned his head and told the butler, "Yarman, you should just take my light helmet and make it old."

"But your figure has changed a bit in the past few months. The previous armor was one size bigger..." the butler was embarrassed.

"But this just proves that I have been persecuted and thinned out day by day, isn't it?" Lei Zhe spoke eloquently.

"Ha..." Morris laughed shamelessly.Lei Zhe turned to stare at him viciously.

Mr. Butler withdrew in a very timely manner, leaving sufficient fighting space for the two adults who were about to pinch each other.

"Having been persecuted and getting thinner?" Morris tried hard not to laugh too shamelessly.

Lei Zhe said wronged: "Nonsense, since I came to this world, I haven't had a good meal. Every time I have to chew for a long time to swallow the bread, okay? The fishy smell of dairy products is also terrible. Life couldn't be more difficult. You know when I'm home... woohoo."

His mouth was covered suddenly, Lei Zhe raised his eyes in astonishment, and looked at Morris.

The touch that is too close makes the lips even feel the palm prints clearly, and the lowered voice gently blows into the ear hole with the breath: "Someone is coming."

Lei Zhe shook his red ears and blinked, indicating that he had understood.

Morris then withdrew his hand.The warm touch withdrew from his lips, Lei Zebie started, looked at the door, and secretly licked his lips.

The person who came was Nancy, she bowed and said: "The housekeeper asked us to come and make up for you."

Lei Zhe still had no time to express her opinion, so she flattened her. Forget it, since Nancy was sent by her mother to be her personal maid, it should be credible.

Nancy thinly applied a layer of lamb fat on Lei Zhe's face, then dipped a cotton swab with the liquid in a small glass bottle, and applied it to Lei Zhe's lips.

A sour smell penetrated into the nose, Lei Zhe wrinkled his nose, is this the virtue of lipstick in this world?A little curious.

Then Nancy poured the liquid into the cup again and held it to Lei Zhe's mouth, obviously to feed him.

Now Lei Zhe couldn't stay silent anymore, and asked, "This is?"

A look of surprise flashed across Nancy's face, but she still explained: "This is vinegar, which can make your lips pale."

Lei Zhe twitched the corners of his lips, and I said why the sour smell is so familiar.

Lei Zhe drank the vinegar obediently, and saw that Nancy sucked something from a small porcelain bottle with a straw and wanted to drip it into her eyes.

"What is this?" Anyway, I have already exposed my ignorance once, and Lei Zhe doesn't mind exposing it more thoroughly.

Nancy explained patiently: "This is belladonna juice, which can make your eyes look more attractive."

"I don't read much, don't fool me, this is obviously poison!" Lei Zhe grabbed Nancy's hand and refused to let her drip it into his eyes.

"But everyone is using it..." Nancy's expression became more and more puzzled. She really didn't expect that her young master could jump three feet high for this.

Lei Zhe was about to say something more, but suddenly felt that someone had stepped on him hard. He turned his head and saw Morris shaking his head slightly at him.

Lei Zhe finally realized belatedly that maybe in this era, as a nobleman, it is very common to instill poison in the eyes, and his reaction just now was too much of a fuss.But is it really okay to drop this stuff in your eyes?He doesn't have the power of faith to protect him!

Lei Zhe's look of struggling whether he should die heroically or not was too ugly. Morris sighed and interjected: "Don't worry about your eyes. After all, belladonna juice still has some side effects, and the gain outweighs the gain. Are you going to do it later?" Do you want to powder him?"

"Yes. Mr. Steward ordered that the young master should look pale and haggard." Nancy replied.

Do you want to powder?Lei Zhe twitched the corners of his lips, as if many people were poisoned to death by the lead in the powder in ancient times, right?Don't you want to lose your face? The girls in this world are really brave enough!He must popularize health knowledge to Mary later.

"Have you any ice here?" Morris asked.

"Yes." The maid Nancy replied.

"The traces of the powder are easy to see through. Go get some ice and apply ice to his face for better results," Morris ordered.

Nancy looked at Lei Zhe, Lei Zhe nodded, and then Nancy nodded and turned to fetch ice.

As soon as Nancy left, Morris immediately poked Lei Zhe's stomach with his finger, hating iron for being weak. "I really doubt how you have hidden your identity until now. There are problems all over your body, and you don't know how to hide it at all."

"As long as there is Mary covering them, these servants will see that something is wrong, so what?" Lei Zhe sincerely thanked the strict hierarchy of this barbaric age, and defended himself: "If you keep pretending to be another person, it's okay too tired."

"For some reason, I always feel that you will not stay in this world forever." Morris stared closely at Lei Zhe.If you have to live with a certain identity from now on, even if you don't want to pretend, you should find a suitable reason to cover up for yourself to avoid future troubles, right?Only those who travel short distances have no foresight and willful behavior.

Lei Zhe's back was instantly drenched in cold sweat.It's just a small matter, Morris is too sensitive...

"What else is in this makeup box, why don't you introduce it to me, so that I won't show my flaws again later." Lei Zhe changed the subject very timidly.

Morris stared at Lei Zhe who was about to curl himself into a ball to escape reality, his eyes fluctuated a few times, but in the end he just sighed: "Before you leave, write me a copy of "You've Got Me" silently."

Is this the rhythm of defaulting to leave as soon as you hand over the book?While Lei Zhe breathed a sigh of relief, he couldn't help feeling a little flustered. He nodded indiscriminately, and said, "When the matter subsides, I'll write the book silently for you."

There was nothing to say for a while, until Nancy came over with ice and dressed Lei Zhe as a pale boy, and the two didn't communicate with each other.

Not long after, Mr. Butler came back.As Lei Zhe ordered, a pair of light helmets were temporarily worn out, which looked a bit tragic.

Lei Zhe stopped talking nonsense, took it directly and put it on, and asked casually, "How many people are there outside?"

"The civilians in the vicinity are basically here, and the people from the referee are shouting outside us at the moment." The steward replied.

"Ahem." Morris couldn't help reminding the butler to pay attention to his words.

The butler blinked and pretended to be innocent. Did he say anything?He simply stated the facts.Commoners are born too sensitive!Nancy told him that she actually used ice to freeze the young master's face. Do you think that young master Flores is as thick-skinned as the commoners?Poor young master, his face was so pale and blue.

Lei Zhe intervened between the two of them, interjecting: "Master Judge, you are an expert in this field, come and see for me if there is anything inappropriate about this armor."

"You look like this, it reminds me of the morning makeup of ladies." Morris said with a smile, but his eyes turned to the housekeeper Alman.

Several veins popped up on Alman's forehead immediately, it was so deceiving!The loyal butler turned his head to look at his young master: It is tolerable or unbearable, young master, give this bastard a slap!

The stupid and cute young master blinked, and gave a blank "oh", but didn't respond.

Young master, how could you not respond!Morris has insulted you so much, how can you bear it.Although, he definitely has no intention of that towards you, but this is rude enough, it is unreasonable not to slap you...

The butler was filled with righteous indignation: Wait, is it because the young master wanted something from that bastard that he had to suppress his anger and smile?That's right, Lord Viscount doesn't know when he will wake up. They are no longer the uncompromising masters of the Netherlands. The young master's confident appearance before was just to reassure his servants.

After brainstorming about his young master's history of enduring humiliation, the butler Alman silently wiped Lei Zhe's tears, and immediately apologized to Morris: "I'm sorry, Mr. Judgment, I was a little careless before, please forgive me."

"It's okay." Morris replied lightly, only then did he realize how inappropriate what he said just now. It's simply too abnormal for him to fight with a mere butler.

Morris lowered his eyes, took a deep breath, and suppressed his ups and downs: Is it so out of control... It seems that Lei Zhe's leaving this matter will have a greater impact on him than he imagined.

Morris pressed the untimely wry smile at the corner of his lips, and when he looked up at Lei Zhe, he had already returned to his usual indifferent look: "The armor is fine, and the crowd is almost there. Those people will strike at some point, you Let's get out quickly."

"Yeah." Lei Zhe nodded without realizing it, and smiled nervously: "Wish me good luck."

Morris nodded: "Don't worry, I've made arrangements, and nothing will happen."

Hearing Morris' assurance, Lei Zhe's heart instantly felt at ease: "With your words, I feel relieved, and I'm going."

"Go." Morris watched him leave.

The author has something to say:

【Tips after the article】

Morning makeup:

In the era of absolute monarchy, morning makeup was one of the important means for ladies to show off their coquettishness. They invited men (these men were not even husbands or formal lovers) to admire their dressing and makeup.The ladies wore flirtatious home clothes, or never wore them at all, and let the maids spend hours grooming themselves and flirting.Then, after the maids left, please invite the male guests or male guests who have been staring at you before to tidy up your clothes, such as pulling the neckline or something. Friendly reminder, the necklines of women in that era were very, very, very very open Low...As for the next drama, you all know~~Frédéric Bazille's famous painting "Morning Makeup" depicts such a scene.

PS: In fact, the period of absolute monarchy has converged a lot.During the Renaissance, the emphasis was on not wearing clothes, such as girls walking on the street naked or wearing only a small bath towel, followed by a group of naked men watching.For example, sleeping on the same bed with your husband and guests naked, and the guests don’t know how to wear clothes. This is polite, to show that he is magnanimous... So, stop cursing egg yolk time travel, it’s really scary to wear it in certain periods Ah yes!

Therefore, Morris actually teased Lei Zhe a little.It's a pity that Lei Zhe, a time traveler, doesn't understand the connotation at all.

Vinegar wipe lips:

Vinegar has a mild stimulating effect on oral cells and capillaries. In addition, acetic acid is an aerobic organic acid with reducing properties. When it meets the colored substances in the lips, it will react and be taken away by the capillaries in the mouth.So it can make the lip color white and last for about an hour.Curious girls can try it out.

Belladonna Juice Color Contacts:

The belladonna juice contains scopolamine, which can effectively paralyze the iris sphincter and ciliary muscles and produce the effect of pupil dilation.During the Renaissance, Western aristocratic women often dripped belladonna juice containing hyoscyamine into their eyes to dilate the pupils and make themselves look more beautiful.Stern warning, this product is poisonous, readers please wear colored contact lenses obediently, don't be tempted to try this.