The best candidate

I was admitted to the university, and Xia Cheng was already preparing for the postgraduate entrance examination.

On the day I got the notice, I ran to his house and wanted to say thank you to him.

Because of Xiang Shiran, he got angry and didn't open the door.I have always insisted that Fu Zixiao was the victim, and I have no intention of apologizing for it.I always felt that Xia Cheng paid too much attention to Xiang Shiran.At first I thought he was like me, using his life to protect a beautiful place.But many years later, when I really realized what that child meant to him, it was too late.

When I turned to leave, he suddenly opened the door, with dark eyes, and asked, "She is an innocent victim just like you. Why did you do this? You feel at ease and put all the blame on her."

After he finished speaking, he shut me out again.I fell into an ice cave and suddenly woke up.With partiality, we claim to be righteous, and attack Shiran from the perspective of the victim.Fu Zixiao was indeed a victim, but it was never Xiang Shiran who hurt him.Like Xiang Shiran, I did nothing wrong and I was charged with unnecessary crimes.

But it was too late, for a long time, I never saw Xiang Shiran again.

I never saw Xia Cheng again.Until my sophomore year, he was admitted to graduate school.I was entrusted by Professor Fu to give him a congratulatory gift.

At his door, I saw him talking to someone.However, what happened next broke my understanding.

Xia Cheng hugged the man and gave a long and charming kiss.In fact, it is said that a person like Xia Cheng is good-looking and has a good brain. Such a picture should be pleasing to the eye.

But the problem is, the one in his arms is a man.

The two of them finally noticed my presence, and the stranger was a little taken aback.Xia Cheng had a calm face, let the man leave, sat at the door and looked at me, mockingly said: "Why don't you come in, are you scared?"

fart!

I walked into Xia Cheng's room and forgot what to say for a moment.He then closed the door, the impact of the security door and the door frame was not loud, but it shocked my body.

Xia Cheng sat down across from me, and said, "The one just now is my partner."

"Don't you like Xiang Shiran?" I admit that I am more willing to believe that he likes Xiang Shiran than the man just now.

Xia Cheng generously admitted: "That's right, she is my only hope to live like a normal person."

I don't understand, my mind is in a mess.I thought there must be something wrong, and after much deliberation, I couldn't come up with a conclusion.

"You think I'm sick now, don't you? You think I'm sick too?"

I don't think he's sick, I just think, of the two of us, one of us must be crazy.

He said again: "Do you remember, I was fighting with others at that time."

I didn't understand what he was going to say, but following his words, I remembered that when I was in high school, I was picked on.It was Xia Cheng who saved me that time, and the other four had to be beaten.

"You know? When I'm called a prodigy, it's not always a good thing. Along with this title, there are also some provocations. At first I only had to be beaten, and then I started to resist. Those fighting skills, all from one time I learned from being beaten again. The most ridiculous thing is that when I was beaten, it was my own fault, and when I beat others, it turned into a heinous crime. People have said that I am different since I was a child. But everyone." Xia Cheng was a little excited, and veins popped out on his forehead.

"After entering adolescence, I discovered my sexual orientation. There was no special trigger, I just knew it. It was also at that time that I met Xiang Shiran, she was the first opposite sex that interested me. I have been waiting, When she grows up, I will be with her, and I can finally live a normal life. Unfortunately, she won't grow up."

When I left that day, I said to him: "I don't think you are sick, Xia Cheng, to me, you are light, bright and colorful."

I don't know how Xia Cheng reacted, I only know that he was watching me leave at the door.I walked around the corner, only to hear the heavy closing sound of the door.

The university I went to was the university where Professor Fu worked.Anyway, it's an important point, most of the students in the class come from all corners of the country.In my whole dormitory, only I am a local. Of course, looking at the whole school, the proportion of locals is still far greater than that of foreigners.

The dormitory is ranked according to age, and I am the third.Xiao Wu in the dormitory lives in the lower bunk next to me.He is a person with an extremely ordinary appearance and temperament, majoring in fine arts, and his painting skills are quite good.

That day the eldest brother and the fourth child were playing around, knocking over the water glass on the table and wet the picture album he put on the table.The two of them hurriedly picked up the album, intending to spread it out to dry.Opening a page casually, it turned out to be my portrait.

Just as I was about to say that his painting looked alike, Xiao Wu came back and asked angrily, "What are you doing?"

The boss was guilty at first, but Xiao Wu overreacted, which made him feel a little uncomfortable. He deliberately provoked: "Why, what's the secret?"

Xiao Wu heard the words and was about to come over to snatch it. The boss was cheap, and then turned a few pages.It doesn't matter if you turn it over, but without exception, it is full of portraits of me in various poses and expressions.

We have a good relationship on weekdays, and we don't rummage through each other's things. We don't know anything about the content of the album, and we didn't expect that there would be only this in the meeting.

While the boss was in a daze, Xiao Wu snatched back the album and rushed out of the dormitory angrily.

The dormitory was very quiet for a while, and after a while, I said awkwardly: "It seems that I am quite suitable for being a model."

The boss snorted coldly: "Damn gay, I can't live in this dormitory anymore!" Then he also rushed out.

The rest of the people walked out one by one without saying a word.Xiao Wu didn't come back that day, neither did the boss.

The next day, Xiao Wu and I were called away by the counselor. After being questioned harshly, I saw Xiao Wu with his head down, without saying a word.

Just when the counselor was about to get angry, I stood up and said, "Teacher, it's my fault." Anyway, I have endured all kinds of insults, and I don't care about multiple titles of "dead gay".

The counselor asked me to continue, and I said: "You know, about my father, apart from cursing and verbal abuse, I haven't heard compliments from others for a long time. That day Xiao Wu said, I look good and have a good temperament. He wanted me to be a model. That was the first compliment I heard in years, and I was obsessed with that feeling of uncertainty, and I begged him."

The counselor finally remembered that I was the child of a criminal, and he no longer had any expectations of me, so he turned to educate Xiao Wu who had gone astray.

On the way back, Xiao Wu suddenly grabbed me. He was a little excited, and there was hope in his eyes. He said, "Why do you want to help me?"

"Xiao Wu, I think you draw beautifully, and you will definitely achieve something in the future."

"What's the meaning"

I know that the reality is cruel. Since he doesn't want to admit it, why don't I point it out: "Xiao Wu, there's no need to ruin yourself for these things."

Xiao Wu suddenly went crazy and tiptoed to kiss me, but the kiss was urgent but helpless.

Fortunately, there were no cameras all over the school in the early years. Fortunately, there was no one nearby at that time.

I pushed him away and said, "Xiao Wu, do you feel that? I don't mean that to you."

When I left, I didn't look at Xiao Wu.I personally think that he is still young and should not bear any stains on his back.I don't want him to go through the pain I suffered back then.

The boss didn't succeed in changing the dormitory, so he turned his anger on Xiao Wu and bullied others in different ways.The second child and the sixth child pretended that there was no such person in the dormitory, and turned a blind eye to Xiao Wu.Because of his gender, the fourth child is always worried that he will be coveted by the fifth child.

In order not to let Xiao Wu fall into the quagmire, I also avoided him. I thought I was helping him.

Various scars began to appear on Xiao Wu's body. By the time I noticed the seriousness of the problem, a semester had passed.Campus bullying is very serious. I experienced it back then, and I know how painful it is.

One day, I happened to see Xiao Wu in the library, walking alone with his head down.Then the boss suddenly appeared, put his arm on his shoulder, and forced Xiao Wu to go in another direction.

I was afraid that the boss would bully the fifth boy, so I followed them all the way to a small hotel outside the school.Thinking of the injuries on Xiao Wu's body, he thumped mentally.The boss hates homosexuality the most. I kept reassuring myself that things were not as bad as I thought.

I stepped into the hotel and searched from room to room.Fortunately, the hotel is small, and during the day, there are not too many people.

Just when I reached the third door, I heard a heated argument inside.

"Don't you fucking like men? What are you pretending to be?"

"Grass, you all come here with me, and you still want to pretend to be noble."

The words behind are too disgusting to be seen.I was so angry that I trembled and beat hard.

"Who is it?" The boss's voice sounded impatiently.

I kept knocking on the door without speaking, and the boss asked louder: "Who is it?"

I still didn't speak, the boss scolded me for being crazy, and then I heard the footsteps of the boss coming to open the door.The boss opened the door with a displeased expression on his face. Before he could speak, he was knocked down by my fist.I rode on him like crazy, bowed left and right, and beat him hard.

The boss reacted and began to dodge and resist, and soon the two of us wrestled together, and Xiao Wu came to pull me away.

The boss got up from the ground and cursed: "You must be sick!"

"I'm sick. At least I'm human. Are you human?" I pulled the disheveled Xiao Wu and said, "Look, this man, has he ever done anything to apologize to you?" , why did you hurt him?"

"What the hell are you? He deserves it."

"I deserve it for beating you!" I was about to strike, but Xiao Wu grabbed me.The boss took a mouthful of saliva, slammed the door and left.

I was very uncomfortable and asked him: "Why did you come with him?"

"If I don't come, he will directly commit violence in the school."

"Then why don't you say it?"

He smiled wryly, "How do you say it? To whom?"

I am dumbfounded, indeed, how can a homosexual tell others that he has been raped by the same sex.

Xiao Wu's mouth was tightly pursed, and tears rolled stubbornly in his eyes.I thought of Xia Cheng, and I finally understood how important Xiang Shiran was to him.This means that he can love and live like an ordinary person, and he has the opportunity to become a normal person in the eyes of the general public.

"I'm sorry." This voice was addressed to Xiao Wu as well as Xia Cheng.

Xiao Wu said, "It's not your fault."

I was worried about Xiao Wu's injury, so I went out to sell him trauma medicine.When I came back, there was no one in the room.Just when I thought he was gone, there was some movement in the toilet.

The toilet door was not closed, and I saw Xiao Wu with a gloomy expression and a cigarette butt that was about to burn out in his hand.He snuffed out the cigarette butt against his arm, seeing how skillful and natural his movements were, this should not be the first time.

Before I could think about it, I rushed forward and knocked out the cigarette butt in his hand.Xiao Wu obviously didn't expect that I would come back, and he looked surprised.

His upper body, I finally saw clearly, there are large and small wounds on his body.His chest and back were full of signs of being abused, which was obviously done by the boss.There are also large and small burns, and several hideous knife wounds, these should be caused by Xiao Wu himself.

I was so angry that I trembled, "Why, why do you humiliate yourself when others humiliate you?"

Xiao Wu finally couldn't hold back anymore, and cried while hugging me.He is just an ordinary boy who likes swimming and table tennis. He also plays games all night. His specialty is drawing. He has good grades.

Such an ordinary boy, just because he likes the same sex, everyone thinks he is sick and deprives him of the right to live a normal life.

"Why do I like you? If you don't like me, don't give me hope. Do you know that it really hurts!"

Xiao Wu accused me, I stood stiffly, I didn't even have the courage to hug him.

"Xiao Wu," I said, "I don't like you, not because you are not good enough, but because I am not the right person. One day you will meet the right person, he will love you, protect you and cherish you, he Will be a better person than me."

"Impossible, I'm a monster, I'm abnormal, no one will like me."

"You're a bastard, your father is a criminal, you bitch!"

"The children of criminals will also be criminals..."

"..."

Those memories that I thought were insignificant, memories that I thought I had forgotten, were induced by Xiao Wu and flooded into my brain instantly.I closed my eyes and listened, so I couldn't hear those harsh abuse, which had been suppressed in my heart.Those ugly memories rushed to my face, overwhelming me.

A cold voice in the darkness remembered, I looked up and saw Xia Cheng with a cold face, and said to me: "Come here."

That icy voice cut through the darkness, everything in the past seemed not so bad.

I comforted Xiao Wu: "You are just an ordinary person, and you will experience ordinary people's happiness or misfortune. At this moment, you just like someone who doesn't like you. As long as you are a person, you will experience this. As for those who hurt you , none of them matter."

I don't know if Xiao Wu understood, but since that day, there has been no new injury on his body.He has changed back to the former Xiao Wu, he still draws pictures, and the picture book is full of beautiful scenery.He stopped playing games, started working out, and learned free kickboxing.

When he graduated, he gained 10 pounds in weight, all of which was muscle.Anyone who knows him well knows that those muscles are not grown by drinking eggs, but by actual exercise.

Later, Xiao Wu was admitted to graduate school, and when I saw him again, he was already an excellent painter, and there was someone who loved him by his side.