do not like

When I woke up, I was in the hospital.

I absolutely hate this place.When Shi Min was in the hospital, I sat in the corridor or next to his hospital bed, but this time, I didn't expect my identity and role to change.

Shi Min sat by the hospital bed without saying a word. Seeing that I woke up, he immediately got up and rang the bell.

The doctor came in and explained the precautions for heart disease, and gave a bunch of instructions.

My energy is all on Shi Min: he listens very carefully, takes out memos on his mobile phone from time to time to write down, and politely thanks the doctor, and asks what needs to be changed according to my habits; after getting the answer , and looked at me with warning and gentle eyes, as if saying, do you hear me, change it.

I suddenly felt very warm at this moment.Very perverted, right?Obviously, just a moment ago, I was in pain to death, but now because of his eyes, I feel that my heart is covered with syrup.

After the doctor left, Shi Min moved the chair closer and asked, "How do you feel now?"

"It's fine," I said, "don't worry."

Shi Min didn't speak.

I waited for him to take me into his arms and gently rub my hair, just like he did to me years ago when I cried about my breakup with him.

But he didn't, but he was far away, comforting me very gently: "It will all pass."

It's okay if I don't mention this, but when I mention it, I think of my mother's slightly hunched back, and the silent movement of wiping tears.

"I think I might not be able to stay here any longer." My tone must have been aggrieved.

Shi Min didn't answer, but comforted me more gently, and after a while, he held my face up to see if I was crying.

It's not like a teenage child, so it's not that useless, crying after being scolded a few times.The way he looked at me was so gentle that my nose was really sore.

I could feel Shi Min lowering his head, I think he wanted to kiss my hair.

It's just that the expected kiss didn't fall, I only heard a deep voice above my head: "You will have a home."

I couldn't bear it any longer, and threw myself into his arms and cried.

Shi Min froze for a moment, but my appearance was too pitiful, so he didn't push me away.

After a commotion, Liu Zhen couldn't stay any longer.I plan to find a day to move out.After much calculation, I still feel that returning to Ningcheng is more familiar.After all, there are many job opportunities, and my old club also agreed to my suspension without pay, as well as familiar hospitals and doctors.

Shi Min did not agree to the proposal, saying that he still needed to think about it.

"Although I may not go back with you..." Shi Min hesitated and said, "But after you are discharged from the hospital, do you want to go back to your home to have a look?"

I shook my head.

Shi Min said that I was stubborn and didn't know how to talk to my family.

"I don't know how to talk about it?" I felt very wronged, so I told him what I had experienced in the psychological clinic.

"I really talked about it, and every time I opened my mouth very calmly, but as soon as I talked about it-as soon as I talked about this matter, my dad could smash everything in the house-hit me! "

I pointed to the scar hidden in my hair, "That's it, I smashed it with an ashtray, it hasn't healed after eight years." Then I pointed to my thigh, "You asked me why there was a scar on my leg and that one, the chair The back was broken, and the wood stuck in."

"I'm sorry." After hearing this, Shi Min quickly stopped talking, and said softly, "Okay, don't think about it, it's all over."

But when I mention these things, I still feel terrified. It’s okay if I don’t say anything. When I think about it suddenly, I feel that my internal organs are churning.

"It's not that I don't want to go home." I suddenly wanted to cry, and threw myself into his arms without caring about his permission, "I want to go back, I really want to go back, who doesn't want to have a home?"

Speaking of "home", I can think of the house that belongs to us.Once, I had a family and a lover, but I lost them all.

"But they just won't forgive me. What can I do? I don't know if they will use the money back. Every time I secretly call my mother, my mother will be scolded by my father." I said. I couldn't hold it back anymore, and my nose was sore again, "Now that my brother has grown up, I can't let my dad call me a pervert in front of him—"

"Hush——" Shi Min hurried to comfort me, telling me not to think about it, "Okay, stop talking, let's have a fun chat."

But when I thought about how bright and full the home was, I couldn't calm down.

"Actually, during the college entrance examination, they got up earlier than me every day." I said, "In the morning self-study at six o'clock, my mother got up at five o'clock to cook for me, saying that the food bought outside was not clean and nutritious. She called I’ll take my college entrance exams so that I can go out, see the outside world, and find someone I like.”

"I found it." I rubbed against his clothes, "I found it, but they didn't agree. I think, as long as time is long enough, there will always be a happy ending, right?"

As I said that, I suddenly felt that this sentence was very funny.

If time is long enough, the ending may not be happy.

It's also possible, like I used to, to lose everything in the long pull.

"No, there may not be a happy ending." I sneered, "I did it all myself, and everyone I love is disappointed in me—I really, really don't deserve to be loved."

Shi Min then distracted me with other things, and turned my face towards him forcefully, "No, Fang Min, you deserve it."

His eyes were firm, as if he was talking about something so important, but he just said, Fang Min, you are worth it.

"You have a very smart mind, a very hot feeling, a very aggressive spirit, and you can persist—"

"Then why is no one willing to love me?" I was even more aggrieved, and couldn't help but want to wipe my tears on the hospital bed, but I couldn't do that, so I could only beg Shi Min in a low voice to pass me a piece of paper.

Shi Min sighed, and while gesturing twice on my face with a piece of paper, he said, "Why not? Do you remember that when you were a senior in high school, the whole class pointed at you and said, 'Fang Min is the most popular' .Every time get out of class is over, there will be a circle of people around your desk.”

"Also, after you work, aren't you very likable? Although I always complained about your work before, it is undeniable that when you are wearing a suit and standing on stage for a pre, that kind of— High-spirited? Maybe I can use this word to describe you, I can't think of a better one for a while—in short, it's an appearance that everyone will envy when they see it."

"At that time, I was thinking that Fang Min really belonged to heaven and earth. I also watched you grow up step by step. When you first went to Ningcheng, you pointed to the tallest building and said you wanted to go in. As a result, you not only went in You have achieved such excellence in such a short period of time—you see, you are more purposeful and courageous than most young people, how can anyone not love you?"

When he said these words, his eyes were encouraging and gentle.I don't know if it's my illusion, but I seem to have returned to the most beautiful year in my life, the year in Liuzhen.

"But it's so tiring, it's so tiring to grow up step by step." I lifted the quilt to cover half of my head, "I was tired every day in the third year of high school, but looking at it now, I'm not tired, it was the most beautiful year gone."

The strange thing is that when we mentioned "beautiful", the first thing we thought of was not the time when we first moved to Ningcheng and the house grew bigger and bigger, but in Liuzhen, where I had nothing and he who had plummeted—in In a dilapidated small classroom, sweat was sticky.

The class bell doesn’t sound good, but it has become the TOP1 of our tacit, beautiful voice.

"It was great then," I said, sniffling.

"Yeah, it was so good back then." Shi Min brushed my hair loose and said with a smile, "Who wouldn't want to go back to that time?"