if i lose my face

After that, I spent some time resting in the hospital.I've been depressed and sometimes cry into a puddle.

What happened to me now, I don't need to elaborate, it's very clear.I lost that striking and proud face, it was like losing a gorgeous mask, and now I can only be naked in front of the crowd.The sense of superiority in my bones was cruelly and forcefully stripped away, and then smashed to pieces by a big rock that I couldn't bear the weight of.

Some things are so painful that I don't even want to think about them.Because thinking too much is like being caught in a sad cycle.I often try my best to numb myself, and finally cry a mess.

The doctors in the hospital would always see my teary eyes and choked up sobs, and they would always make fun of me for being like a crying little girl.Even the young female nurses laughed along!Whenever this happens, I cry even more sadly.

Because of my sexual orientation, my parents kicked me out of the house in the third year of high school, and we have never had any contact with each other—I think, at this moment, I live in a hospital, and they must know nothing In which hemp shop are you nesting.

During this period, every day Hu Hang would take the bus from school to the hospital to take care of me.The school is some distance away from the hospital, but he still came to me tirelessly, and often brought me a lot of fresh fruit—the food in the hospital was poor these days, and I had a heavy mouth. After I got better, I wanted him to give me I bring some snacks or spicy duck neck, but he always refuses me sternly, no matter how many times I say the same.This made me very dissatisfied. Several times he talked to me, but I just ignored him.

But to be honest, he is very good at taking care of people.He usually has a warm and gentle attitude towards people, and he never gets angry easily.I have been classmates with him since the first year of high school, until now we are in another school in the university, and in the third year of junior year, I haven't noticed any major changes in his personality.

But once, I looked at the scene of people coming and going outside the window, and I somehow thought of my current face.Thinking that I will be a drop in the ocean in the future, I feel uncomfortable and don't want to eat.Hu Hang's face changed at that moment!He comforted me, but he insisted that I eat, and he couldn't refuse, like an old mother who was worried that her child would spoil her stomach.

In my eyes, the relationship between the two of us is actually not particularly close, I am flamboyant and he is restrained.But he was the best person in the whole school after my accident.From time to time, the image of Hu Hang running towards me without fear in the fire will pop up in my mind. Whenever this happens, I will be full of gratitude to him.

Having said that, he was obviously injured himself, but whenever I mentioned it, he would always mention it lightly.But I faintly feel that maybe it is not as easy as he said.Once I pulled up his sleeve while he was not paying attention, and a scar like a centipede appeared in front of my eyes!At that time, he slapped my hand away, turned and left without hesitation.I thought he was angry with me, and I felt bad for a few days.

The next time I saw him again was one morning, and he bought me a lot of fruits that I love to eat.I thought he forgave me, so I ate happily.When he had had enough, he sat next to me and said to pack up now and leave the hospital and go back to school.

At that time, I was stunned, and my heart became heavy and painful in an instant, and the sweetness of the apple in my mouth disappeared.Unexpectedly, one day, the place I once called heaven would embarrass me so much!

When I got back to school, I didn't want to go anywhere, so I went straight to the dormitory for the first time.Shaoyang was the only one in the dormitory, and he was sitting on the bed playing with his mobile phone.He was stunned for a few seconds when he saw me coming in, and then he saw Hu Hang behind me, and then he looked at me suddenly.I know, he doesn't recognize me!

My current appearance is mediocre, my nose bridge is not straight and my eyes are not big. Except for my figure, I really don't look like the high-spirited Lin Zhou I used to be.Why should I blame him for not recognizing me?

Thinking of this, I started to feel uncomfortable again, so I turned a deaf ear to Shaoyang's concern, and fell down on Hu Hang's bed with my shoes on, and took a muffled rest.Shaoyang looked embarrassed, but Hu Hang didn't say anything about my behavior.He seemed to sigh slightly, and then I heard him start packing my things for me.

By the time I woke up, it was already two o'clock.I got up and walked around the dormitory, and saw that Hu Hang had arranged all my things neatly, but he himself had disappeared.

I don't have the confidence to go out, but it doesn't mean that no one will come to the door by myself.As soon as I opened the door, what I saw was a group of men and women blocking the door, holding exquisite gifts and gorgeous flowers.They were surprised when they saw me, and some even asked me, "Student, where is Lin Zhou?"

If I don't say anything, some people will be dissatisfied.Until one of the girls pointed at my face and said in disbelief that I seemed to be Lin Zhou.Immediately afterwards, everyone's eyes widened, as if they were looking at a monster.I told them that I was indeed Lin Zhou.This once boasted "ultra-unique super-magnetic" sound is not deceiving.

They were a little embarrassed, but they still gave me gifts and flowers with enthusiasm, cared about me, and said they would come to see me someday.But the person who made this promise among them, in the next month, I didn't see him for the second time.

When I was in the hospital, no one came to see me because Hu Hang told me that news of my disfigurement had spread in school.These are probably unbelievers.

This time it can be regarded as desperate.

Sitting on a stool, looking at a table of flowers and gifts, I am no longer entitled to own them.On a rare occasion, I picked some practical ones and stuffed them into the drawers of several people, and asked Hu Hang to send all the others back one by one.

In the evening, all the people in the dormitory came back, Zhang Yan and Shao Yang chatted with me around me.Although they were taken aback at first, their attitude towards me remained the same, the intimacy should still be intimacy and sincerity.I can't help but think of the behavior I used to be careless in school, and I feel guilty and grateful to them.At this moment, Hu Hang is washing the quilt that was dirty by me during the day.

It is impossible for me not to go out for the rest of my life.With the encouragement of several people for several days, I finally stepped out of the dormitory building and went to class.Along the way, I am no longer dazzling wherever I go.Many people will see a back that belongs to Lin Zhou, but what they see is a face that does not belong to Lin Zhou.

After one day, the whole school knew that I, Lin Zhou, was really ruined.There is no scar on my face, and my appearance is no different from ordinary people, but I am really not handsome anymore.Everyone seems to have changed, they will no longer worship and love me.

The day I was kicked out of the school basketball team, I played alone on the basketball court for a long time.Tossed a lot of balls and none of them went in.When I play now, except for Hu Hang, no one stays for me on the sidelines.

Another missed shot, I dropped the basketball in desperation and walked to Hu Hang's side.He handed me the water bottle silently, and I took a sip without saying a word.

The girlfriend I made on the day of the accident broke up with me as I expected.

The next day, I met Mu Qiao.Damn, this idiot wants to break up with me!

At that time, Mu Qiao heard that I had just been discharged from the hospital, so she called me and said she wanted to come and see me.I stood in front of him for 3 minutes!He had to stand beside his newly bought sports car and stare at the school gate all the time!Maybe I stared at him for a long time, and he moved his eyes to me belatedly.He looked at it carefully, then smiled awkwardly, and then came over and gave me a warm hug.

That day we stood at the school gate and chatted, and then his company called, and he had to leave.Mu Qiao kissed me for the last time, and then drove away in that brand new sports car.

Then in the afternoon, he made an appointment with the coffee shop we used to go to, and broke up with me.

At this moment, I finally couldn't help it, and yelled out all the questions.I have never spoken so loudly, because I used to be very concerned about my external image, but now with such a face, I still care about shit!

Mu Qiao appeared sensible and graceful, and was not angry because of my roar, but even a little bit apologetic.

"I'm sorry, Xiaozhou, you also know that my life is stressful, so I'm just looking for a lover to be happy."

"You and I, we looked at each other and were together at the beginning, and we didn't have any love. So, let's break up."

Yes, I understood at that time that he just thought I couldn't catch his eyes with my current appearance.My heart twitched, and unstoppable grievances welled up.

Then, I walked back to school alone.I declined his request to send me back to school.I just want to be alone right now.

The coffee shop is a little far from the school, but at this moment it is especially suitable for me, a person who has just "lost love".

Mu Qiao is a good person, I know it.I don't blame him for being like this.He usually protects me like a big brother, takes me on a tour of mountains and rivers, and takes me to many places that I have never been to.We lived happily ever after, like a real couple, but also like close brothers.I admit, I am very greedy and greedy for this kind of life.

But it's not just regret that makes me feel wronged all of a sudden.It's a surge of reality.What I have accumulated these days has made me completely understand: I am really not the Lin Zhou I used to be.

In the setting sun, I stumbled into the dormitory and saw Hu Hang sitting on his bed ironing my clothes.He was startled when he saw me come in.

I twitched the corner of my mouth, seeing his serious and gentle appearance, for some reason, tears fell down all at once.

With tears in my eyes, I couldn't see anything clearly, and I didn't pay attention to his face.When I realized that I was crying, I sniffed my nose hard, then roughly wiped this hateful face, and walked slowly towards him with my mouth curled up.

I didn't have the strength to climb back to my upper bunk, so I walked over to him and fell on it again willfully.Hu Hang had stopped what he was doing, turned around and looked at me quietly.

Under his sight, my tears still fell uncontrollably, soaking his bedding.Crying and crying, I couldn't help but grabbed the corner of Hu Hang's clothes, trembling slightly, as if he was the only one I could rely on in this world.I choked up and cried aloud, I felt Hu Hang tremble slightly suddenly.

Immediately afterwards, a warm and powerful hand suddenly caressed my back gently and patted it slowly.I couldn't help but froze.

That warm hand patted my back one after another, with gentle and powerful force, as if comforting a lost child.The tenderness and sincerity in it seemed to melt me, and made my heart beat hard.

Suddenly, I seemed to feel thousands of thoughts rushing out, trapped in this beating heart, and then turned into relief, turned into mist, and condensed again in my eye sockets For a layer of hot tears...

I started howling like a real child.Such undisguised crying filled the entire quiet dormitory.

I haven't cried since I got out of the hospital. This time, I cried so freely and profusely, as if I wanted to cry out all the past of Lin Zhou who was the past.