Tyrant and his crying baby bottle

Erbao was angry.

What to say to try a new method, in fact, it is... Anyway, now my lips are numb, the tip of my tongue is also numb, and I feel so bad.

The Huotou army said that it was the etiquette in the army. Could it be that the soldiers of the two armies have to do this when they meet, and hug and suck first without saying a word?It's too weird!

Er Bao faintly felt that Huotoujun might be lying to him.In order to verify the authenticity of this etiquette, he called for Ling Yu.

Lang Yu saw a red rope hanging around Erbao's neck, and the things hanging from the red rope were tucked into his collar, which seemed to be a little heavy, and his fair skin was covered with red marks, so he asked with a smile: "Little Boss What treasure are you wearing, longevity lock? It’s heavy.”

The little boss pulled the thing out, quite proudly, "This is Brother Cheng Ming's waist badge, the waist badge of the Fifth Army's coach, and it's for me to back up."

Ling Yu's smile froze at first, then widened, and his eyes drifted to his lord.

This is obviously Cheng Ming's filial piety to the master, but the master used it to coax the children.

The waist badge of the commander in chief of an army is no worse than the Shangfang sword bestowed by the emperor, this is no ordinary love.

Her master ignored her, so she asked again: "Why did the little boss ask me?"

The little boss raised his elbows, covered half of his face, and said in a low voice: "I want to ask Sister Yun Yu, is there any special etiquette in your army? It's not the usual clasped fist salute or kneeling salute, but The gift of a long-lost reunion is more intimate."

Ling Yu didn't know, so he thought for a while and replied: "I guess there is. Just hug, punch a few times, or shake hands or something. This is the way of greeting between acquaintances, and those who are not acquainted will not In this way, it is not the case that there are grades.”

The little boss shook his head, "Is there anything more intimate than this?"

"More intimate than this?" Ling Yu vaguely felt strange, and looked at his master again suspiciously.

But no, the man was flipping the book in his hand, but secretly gestured to her, pressing his index finger on his lips, wondering if he was telling her to keep silent.

Ling Yu said, "What does the little boss think is intimacy?"

The little boss frowned in embarrassment, as if he was ashamed to speak.After that, his voice became softer, almost breathless, "It's like kissing the mouth and sticking out the tongue."

"..." As if struck by lightning, Ling Yu couldn't help but retreat two inches, allowing his upper body to completely stick to the back of the chair.

This, there is no doubt that the little boss was deceived by the lord and was taken advantage of.

Kissing is just kissing, which is said to be military etiquette.

Can this be done by humans?

I really don't know how to answer.

If he denies it, the lord will not be able to pass the test. If he admits it, he will become an accomplice who deceives the little boss.

Who would have the heart to face such a simple and kind person.

After thinking quickly for a while, Ling Yu chose an ambiguous statement: "This way of greeting also exists, but it is not inherited from ancient times, but a new one nowadays, so it is not common. It is not common unless it is a very good friend. , If someone treats you like this, there is no doubt that you are very important in his heart, maybe even more than himself."

Miaozai, it must be no problem to say so!

Unexpectedly, the little boss asked again: "Then sister Yun Yu has such a friend? Have you and brother Cheng Ming also saluted like this?"

If Ling Yu was drinking water, he would have spewed it out right now, and would have to choke and cough endlessly.She laughed and said, "No, no, I haven't gotten to know him that well yet, we're just colleagues, and we're generally on good terms."

"That's it," the little boss seemed to be regretful, "I plan to ask my sister for some experience, because I don't get used to it every time, I think... I feel that a man should only be so close to his wife, it's quite, very embarrassing of."

Ling Yu: Silly boy, it's not your fault. You should be embarrassed. People who are not embarrassed have no heart, such as the one who leaned on the recliner and pretended to read a book.

The little boss still didn't give up, and said: "Has my sister ever done this with other good friends? There must be no more men, but there should be women."

Ling Yu's heart skipped a beat.

how to say.

Sorry to disappoint the little boss.

Because the answer is exactly the opposite.

Ling Yu skipped this point, and said vaguely: "It doesn't have to be like this with his wife. The little boss studies the human body, and he must know that the intimacy between men and women is often caused by biological factors, which is nature. If men and men are like this, Isn't it more pure, without impurities, and sincere feelings from the heart?"

Miaozai, this must be no problem!

Sure enough, the little boss frowned, and looked at the person who treated him like this.It's pretty indescribable.

The little boss got a satisfactory answer, Le Diandian ran to pound the glutinous rice, and Ling Yu went to the lounge, and closed the door heavily after entering.

"Master, can't you just say it straight, it's inappropriate to bully the little boss like this, the subordinates feel embarrassed to help you lie again." The loyal commander of the Seventh Army persuaded his master this way.

But her master said: "You have such a thin skin, how did you kiss the high priest when you were fifteen or sixteen years old? I heard that you forced him."

Yun Yu choked for a moment, and argued: "It's not forced, it's because he was wasting time by himself, and I still need to train, how can I have the time to spend time with him to spend the next month and write poems and economics?"

"So you just have a family with your relatives, and then run away by yourself, making people think about it for six or seven years?"

"..." He wanted to worry about it himself, I didn't force him.On the other hand, the little boss, who is forced to kiss by you every time, is very angry.Ling Yu muttered to himself.

"Okay, you don't have to worry about Erbao's affairs. He has me in his heart, but it's just a leaf that blinds him, and he can't get over the gap of gender. If it were someone else, I wouldn't go around such a big detour, because he doesn't know the world and doesn't understand. As for love, speaking directly will only scare him away. If you want to avoid worries in the future, you must let him really understand and discover my goodness."

In Zang Gong's view, his status as a tyrant is also a big hurdle.Before getting Er Bao, Er Bao had to abandon his previous prejudice and accept his identity.If the order is changed, it will definitely break Erbao's heart again.

Ling Yu also knows the temperament of his master, he will definitely get what he wants, no matter what means he uses.

But when it comes to the matter of the little boss, he is clearly in a hurry but proceeds step by step as much as possible, which shows that he is deeply involved and deeply emotional.

Ling Yu sighed silently and stopped discussing this.

"My lord, my subordinates already know about the Nightcrawler, so why don't you send someone to the Hundred Limbs to find out? If he really concocts a new medicine, he can train a group of people who won't hurt or be afraid of injury, and can heal quickly if they are injured. Soldier, I am afraid that the world will be in chaos."

Zang Gong said: "Well, don't use your own people, ask Cheng Ming to arrange it."

After all, the Fifth Army had already reached an agreement with the Scaled Armor King. Even if they were found to be secretly inquiring about the news of the Hundred Limbs, it could be presumed to be on the safe side.

Ying Yu promised, and said: "A few days ago, the Six Wings also blocked the border, saying that a royal family was stolen, and they should close the checkpoints for strict investigation. In fact, the Hundred Limb King frequently sent envoys to visit, and the Six Wing King was afraid of causing trouble. , Deliberately released false news."

Zang Gong said: "Right now, the alliance between the King of Scale Armor and the King of Hundred Limbs is irreversible. Perhaps it is because the King of Six Wings and the King of Scale Armor broke up that the King of Hundred Limbs wants to lure them with indestructible soldiers. Six King Yi's actions are also a statement. Since he is sincere, he will let him go. Although the Fifth Army has joined the group, they cannot be trusted. It is hard to say what will happen later. We need reliable allies, and we cannot disclose it for the time being. The news that this gentleman is still alive."

Yun Yu said: "We can only try to contact the Shuiqi tribe and the Jimu tribe. But isn't this very strange, the Central Army is directly under the control of the Holy Lord, without the holy decree, how can we win people's trust?"

Cang Gong didn't answer, but asked inexplicably, "How long is it until the next tax return?"

Ling Yu replied: "The tax return has been changed from once every March to once every two months, and there are still about forty days until the end of August. Master, what is your plan?"

Zang Gong said: "Go and talk to the tax department, and check the tax accounts of various places as soon as possible. The weather is so hot, and it's time to give the wealthy businessmen who evade taxes a blow."

Ling Yu said: "But this matter is easy to expose. When the tax is filed at the end of August, the Holy Lord will know that our people have moved the accounts."

After thinking about it again, I suddenly realized, "My lord, are you planning to solve all the problems before then? The time is a bit tight. Even if the military supplies can be collected, we haven't got allies yet."

Cang Gong said: "It seems difficult to win allies, but in fact it is a matter of one day and one night. Ling Yu, you are not young, and the Mid-Autumn Festival feast, do you want to get married?"

puff! !

Ling Yu's face changed several times, and he said in disbelief: "My lord, you are making this idea together! This subordinate just seriously thought about the name of the alliance, but you, do you want your subordinate to marry Qiao Lin? My lord , please forgive the rudeness of your subordinates, in order to achieve your goal, you actually want to sell your right-hand man, it is too heartless..."

Cang Gong didn't mind her rudeness, and said with a smile: "Don't talk about right-hand man, I will even sell myself when necessary."

Ling Yu thought to himself, this is true, you have already sold yourself to Quanren Grocery Store, and the boss is not interested in it, yet you still paid for it.

Cang Gong glanced at her, "Don't mutter, I know exactly what you're thinking."

Yun Yu said: "I didn't murmur, I just thought it was absurd. Qiao Lin is a rookie, what else would he do other than gossip in court? A man who can't lead troops to fight is incompetent. "

Zang Gong said: "You are a woman who doesn't know how to wash clothes and cook, but you know how to lead troops to fight. What do people say about you? Besides, that's not called gossip. He is a civil servant, and it's the civil servant's duty to make suggestions. Oh, I just did that too. You only asked if you want to get married, and you know that you are marrying the high priest of the Jimu tribe? What if you want to marry the Jimu King?"

Yun Yu has never been as charming as a young daughter, but now he blushed and said, "My lord, don't make fun of your subordinates, that's what you think. And King Jimu is a woman, what kind of relationship should I have with a woman?"

"You mean that I shouldn't marry a man?" The Lord of the World didn't bother to go any further, and became serious, "Commander of the Seventh Army, you have always been happy, just say whether you want to or not."

"I..." Ling Yu thought about it for a while, and he didn't know what came to his mind. Suddenly he drew his sword and smashed the tea table, and said fiercely, "He can't even take a punch from his subordinates. Who wants to marry him? I don't want to , unwilling!"

"Hey! You man! If you don't want to, you don't want to. Why are you hacking my tea table?" How can you explain this to the little boss?The Lord of the World looked at the newly installed tea table in a daze.

The culprit ran away, and the blame-blame man was pressed on the recliner by the little boss and beat him up.Instead of being angry, he turned into a flower, rolled onto the soft bed with the little boss in his arms, creaked and made noise for a while, until the little boss laughed so hard that his face was flushed.

The knock on the door interrupted the play. Brother Dong was very embarrassed, and stood outside the door scratching his head in embarrassment, "Well, boss, someone from the official family is looking for you, or you can continue later?"

Er Bao bounced up from Huotoujun's arms, and ran to the counter with a very simple attitude, "Hi, officials, I'm sorry to run over, did I commit a crime again?"

The officers and soldiers laughed and handed him something, "Don't be nervous, little boss, I'm here to send you a letter of authorization. Let's take a look first."

Erbao was full of surprises, and took a look. The gilded red copybook was exclusively authorized to build a human organ donation bank, and approved to accept gratuitous donations, escrow donations, and organ exchanges of equal value.

There is also a copy, and the copy is used to mark the details.For example, how to define the same value, how to open up the purchase and sale channels in a non-exchangeable situation, and the payment of relevant taxes, etc.

Although it is only a beginning, it is indeed authorized.A golden door that shone thousands of miles was opened to him.From now on, no one would dare to falsely accuse him with red lips and white teeth.

Erbao jumped up happily and shook the officers and soldiers desperately, "I'm so lucky! Why, why do I get what I want, why did I suddenly give me a power of attorney, I haven't applied yet! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Master Yamen is so kind!"

The officers and soldiers were dizzy from being shaken by him, but they couldn't help laughing, and said, "Don't get excited, little boss. We don't know the reason. Anyway, this authorization has been issued. From now on, you can do business safely."

"Hey, that's good!" Erbao rushed to the backyard and brought the scalper, "I really don't know how to thank you, officials, don't be disgusted, please accept my scalper!"

cattle:"……"

He kicked Erbao's ass with one hoof.

After being kicked in the butt, Erbao didn't know how to repent, and brought the squirrel again, and stuffed it into his arms, "It's okay, I still have squirrels if I don't like scalpers. Oh, I also have rabbits, officials, etc., I'll go Catch the rabbit!"

After speaking, he rushed to the backyard, snatched the earlobe from Qiu Lengjun's mouth, and handed it wet to the officers and soldiers.The result was not delivered, and was stopped by his guy.

Cang Gong didn't know whether to laugh or cry for a while, rubbed the top of his head, and said, "The lop ears are a gift from me, and you can't give them to others. Squirrels and scalpers don't matter."

Squirrel: "Squeak!"

Scalper: "Moo!"

Head off.

This family was so lively, the officers and soldiers were all smiles, and Brother Dong also laughed and laughed.Someone passed by outside, and couldn't help but look inside a few more times.

After this incident, Erbao felt more and more that his elder brother Cheng Ming and elder sister Ling Yu were good people. He felt that it was impossible for the official to send the authorization for no reason, and those two must have informed the Yamen.So he took out his waist badge from his collar and began to show it off generously.

Seeing how he looks like a villain, Zang Gong endured the hard work with a smile.Fei walked up to the newly built tree house in the Pine and Cypress Garden, leaned on the porch, and said, "You don't think about me? Maybe I helped you secretly."

Er Bao pursed his mouth, "Impossible, you don't have anything, only the identity of the fifth army leader is still hidden."

Cang Gong said: "Then why do you think Cheng Ming and Yun Yu always come to you? Maybe they came to me."

Erbao laughed loudly, "Huotoujun, Huotoujun is such a stinky fart! You are so difficult to get along with, why do people come to you? I invited brother Chengming to be a guest, and then sister Yingyu came to him, and I I was moved by the charisma of his personality and became friends with me. You are an incidental one, and you have been honored by me. But I will not compete with you, if you want to get closer to them, it is fine."

Tibetan Bow stamped his feet, shaking the tree house, "In your eyes, I'm just a dragon and a phoenix? Still grabbing, which of the two is worth my snatching? You just live in the blessing and don't know the blessing, holding the pearl as a fish Eyes, look at those two fish eyes are pearls."

Er Bao muttered, you are the fish eye, and shouted: "Don't stomp on my tree house, it was built for my benefactor to enjoy the shade, read a book and walk the birds! Come down! What if it collapses!"

Tibetan bow: "..."

This boss is really heartless.

After the Obon Festival, paper money floated everywhere on Kunlun Street.There is no need to scatter paper money on this festival, and the officials will not allow it. They are only allowed to be burned at prescribed intersections.

However, there was a water pipe leak in a shop that sold paper money, and many paper money placed on the ground were soaked. When they were moved out to dry, there was a strong wind, and countless pieces were blown away.

Looking at the paper money scattered all over the floor, the owner wanted to cry but had no choice but to mobilize the whole family and the sanitation mother-in-law to clean up together.

Many people said it was bad luck when they saw this scene, because throwing paper money means paving the way, and funerals attract souls, so that newly dead souls can find their way to the underworld.

Erbao was studying medical books in the lounge, and said casually, "Can a person really have a soul after death? Can he really be reincarnated? The theory of ghosts and gods seems to have many contradictions with medicine."

Zang Gong said: "Yes, the day you brought me back, my soul sat by and watched you all night. I know you picked your nose, went to the latrine, took off your pants, and helped the little bird."

When Er Bao heard this, he immediately yelled: "You are talking nonsense! I didn't pick my nose at all, and I didn't go to the latrine! I, you, I passed out after I performed the operation on you, and I woke up the next morning!"

Zang Gong Shi Shiran said, "Oh, you don't know that you have the habit of hysteria? What I saw was what you did when you were hysteria. There are still things I can't say. The scene is so beautiful and unsightly. I'll describe it to you in private when I get home."

Er Bao knew that he was talking nonsense, but seeing Dong Ge'er's half-smiling expression, he suddenly became angry from embarrassment, wishing to sew Huotoujun's mouth shut.

At this time, the clouds passed by and the sky darkened.A gust of wind blew in, the backyard door was slammed twice, and the shop door was knocked at the same time.

Er Bao was startled, went to the outside and saw that the person who came was a young man in luxurious clothes, handsome and elegant, like a son of a rich family, but his long hair was completely white.

Hair of this color has never been seen in Yangjian.

The young man said: "Your Excellency, I am looking for relatives from afar. I was blown by this gust of wind and couldn't find my way. Could you please guide me?"

Erbao grabbed the corner of the table suddenly, thinking how could you be blown away by the wind and couldn't find your way when you were looking for relatives?Is it true that throwing paper money paves the way for ghosts, and if the way is gone, you can't find it?

"Then, who are you looking for?" Er Bao forced himself to be calm.

The man said: "I came to look for the owner of Quanren's grocery store. I saw the sign ten miles away, but I couldn't find it when I walked closer."

Ten miles away?

Can he see ten miles away?

Erbao's heart beat suddenly quickened, "But, my place is Quanren Grocery Store, and you've already arrived. Then, who are you looking for, me? I'm the boss here."

The man looked happy, "I see, the little boss is being polite, can I come in and talk? The wind is too strong outside, I was blinded."

Lost your eyes?

Aren't your eyes fine!

The man seemed to see through Er Bao's thoughts, and said again: "It's not these eyes, but the eyes you can't see. Don't be afraid, little boss, I'm not a bad person."

Invisible eyes?

What are invisible eyes?

"You, you are not a bad person, are you a good ghost?" Er Bao's voice began to tremble, and he wanted to call the general to save me, but he couldn't be more angry about being teased by him just now.

The person outside the door was stunned for a moment, and then laughed, "The little boss misunderstood, I am a human, not a ghost. I come from the Jimu tribe. The eyes on the back can see dozens of miles away, but they usually don't open. I was fascinated by the wind and sand when I opened it just now."

"……"I see.

Er Bao's heart fell back into his chest, and he invited the person in very embarrassedly, and shouted inside: "Come out and say hello, a guest! Guest, what's your name?"

"My name is Qiao Lin, just call me by my first name."

As he finished speaking, a man walked out of the lounge. He was extremely handsome, imposing, and extraordinary, and Qiao Lin recognized him immediately.

"You!" As soon as he uttered a word, the other party raised his hand to signal him to keep quiet, and even glanced at the back of the little boss.Qiao Lin understood, so he casually said a few polite words, explaining the purpose of his visit.

It turned out that he had received a letter from Cheng Ming a few days ago, saying that Ling Yu had come to Kunlun Street, so he came to visit him specially.

Er Baoqi was surprised, and opened his bright eyes and said: "You know Sister Ling Yu, and Brother Cheng Ming? Then we are destined, haha! But your name is so familiar, I seem to have heard it before .”

Qiao Lin coughed lightly, "Yeah, it's very fateful. Did the little boss hear Yun Yu mention me? I'm ashamed to say that I had a marriage contract with Yun Yu when I was young, and we grew up together as childhood sweethearts, but later she joined the army. I'm also busy, so I rarely have the opportunity to meet."

"Is there a marriage contract?" Erbao's little head has a lot of stories, most of which are about falling flowers intentionally, flowing water is ruthless, King Xiang has a heart, a goddess has no dreams, a heroine abandons a child and a daughter, and an infatuated person travels thousands of miles to track down and so on. .

He thinks that tracking thousands of miles can be a good story, but the premise is that people also have that kind of meaning for you.So he asked tentatively: "Sister Ling Yu knows that you are coming?"

Qiao Lin replied: "It's abrupt. She probably doesn't know. If she knows, she will hide away. She has devoted herself to her career these years. I have sent her many letters. She..."

Understood.Sister Ling Yu doesn't like Qiao Lin.

It's easy to understand, Sister Ling Yu is so outstanding, not everyone can be worthy of her. It's not enough just to be handsome, or rich, but also to be like-minded.

Er Bao felt that Cheng Ming's approach was not very authentic.Of course he didn't know who ordered Cheng Ming to do this, he only knew that he had to inform Yun Yu immediately.

So Er Bao confessed that he planned to chat with the guests for a while, and he wanted to go to the latrine, but in fact he rushed out of the shop to find Ling Yu.

Unfortunately, Ling Yu came.

Erbao bumped into her outside, quickly pulled her into a corner, and opened his mouth to ask, "Sister Yunyu, do you have a marriage contract with a man named Qiao Lin? Do you like him?"

Yun Yu was taken aback for a moment, and couldn't help but laugh, "Silly little boss, why do you ask this question? Who mentioned Qiao Lin to you?"

Er Bao said: "Oh, don't laugh, Qiao Lin has blocked the door! But I have stabilized him for the time being. If you don't like him and don't want to admit this marriage contract, you can run away now, and you can't pester you just because of him." You don't care what you like."

"Blocked the door?" Ling Yu vaguely understood, scolded his master again in his heart, then rubbed Xiao Erbao's head, "I don't like him, I don't want to marry him! The little boss is really the best in the world If my sister likes you, she will like you."

"Ah, really?" Er Bao's eyes became brighter, a warm current surged in his blood, he thought to himself, I am more attractive than the silver-haired rich boy brother, it's me that Sister Ying Yu likes, then wait for me If I have saved enough money, can I propose marriage to Sister Lingyu?

As soon as he asked this silly question, Ling Yu laughed so hard, then his face froze as if a gate had been closed, and he pursed his lips.

Er Bao didn't know why she didn't smile again, but when he sensed the dark wind behind him, he turned his head to look, and then turned back abruptly. "Hahahaha, what a coincidence, Sister Yunyu, why are you here, I was just going to find you!"

Ling Yuxu clenched his fist halfway, coughed, and acted with the little boss, "Is that so, what a coincidence, I have nothing to do today, so I came here after wandering around."

Zang Gong had a gloomy face, "It really is a coincidence that the scenery in the corner is particularly beautiful, and anyone wants to come and stay for a while. It's also a coincidence that I heard something that shouldn't be heard. Where did the discussion just now go? Oh, saving money, right? , How much do you plan to save?"

Erbao: "..."

Just, just, just save whatever you want.

The author has something to say: Today’s desire to survive: Women are not obliged to do all the laundry and cooking (emphasis added), and Zang Gong doesn’t mean that.Dear cuties!

Thank you "Shuo Huan" little angel for the nutrient solution!circle around