Peek into the Heart [Unlimited]

Every day is loose and ordinary, except that I have to rely on outside food, everything is perfect.

After sleeping until they woke up naturally, the two would watch TV and have breakfast together, and then do their own housework with a clear division of labor - both of them have good self-care ability, if the accident of cooking is not mentioned.

The morning time always flies by quickly. After lunch, Yu Yan will flip through some exam preparation books, while Song Tayun is buried in his notebook. He seems to be busy developing a new program recently.They don't bother each other, but they can walk out of the room at the same time tacitly, discussing what to have for dinner together.

This is probably the most ideal life in Yu Yan's mind. If possible, he very much hopes to live like this with Song Tayun for the rest of his life.

But he knew that this should not be the life Song Tayun wanted.Leaving home was too sudden, and Song Tayun didn't bring any documents, so he kept wasting away, fearing that he would lose his status as a freshman, and he couldn't go far away.Yu Yan doesn't mind raising him all the time, both of them have very low material desires, even if Yu Yan doesn't work from now on, they can probably live on their savings for the rest of their lives.

But Song Tayun is by no means the kind of character who is willing to be a rice worm. Although he didn't say it explicitly, Yu Yan could tell that the more time passed, the more anxious he looked, but every time he looked at Shang Yuyan, it was another To the crooked smiling eyes.

Between Song Tayun and Song Rui, Yu Yan was an outsider after all, but he couldn't get himself out completely.Even now, he is still thinking about what kind of orientation Song Tayun would have taken if he hadn't appeared.The long-term lack of emotion makes him seem to be enlightened too late in love.

Yu Yan has never regretted being gay for a moment, he has always admitted this frankly, but he also knows the thorns that this identity will bring.If Song Tayun didn't have to face all of this, it would be him who once again brought the wind and rain to the people closest to him.

About coming out of the closet, Yu Yan told his family very early on.The family has always been relatively open-minded. Even so, they were silent for a long time when they first heard the news.

Yu Yan was very grateful to them, and even felt a little guilty. They digested the turmoil in their hearts in private, and did not vent it on him.While he was anxiously waiting for a response, his grandmother, who was over seventy years old, held his hand seriously and told him that the whole family supported his decision and would always be his most solid backing.

That day, Yu Yan cried for a long time in vain.

But Song Tayun didn't have this luck. Every time Yu Yan looked at him, he couldn't help but feel a hypocritical pity.Yu Yan always seems to be trapped by these things, such as compassion, love, and the benevolence of a doctor. He knows that he is an ordinary person, so that every time he has these noble and out of place emotions, he is always accompanied by feelings towards himself. abomination.

If this matter is not resolved quickly, let alone Song Tayun, probably Yu Yan himself will be overwhelmed by emotions.The seemingly warm and beautiful daily life turns out to be just a string of gorgeous bubbles that can burst when poked.

Finally on this day, Yu Yan went out alone on the pretext that his friend was looking for something.He bought some beautifully packaged gift boxes again, although he didn't know if they would be able to stay in Song Rui's home in the end.

Seeing that it was him who came to visit, Song Rui wanted to close the door with a sullen face.Yu Yan stuck an arm in slightly forcefully, and firmly grasped the door.A haggard woman naturally couldn't compete with him in terms of strength. After a few symbolic resistances, Song Rui kicked the door open completely as if angry, and sat on the sofa shaking.

This was not a good start, Yu Yan hesitated, but stepped in, closed the door gently, and put all the gifts on the cabinet in the entrance.

"I don't want your stuff, it's bad luck to see it." Song Rui said coldly.

Yu Yan disobeyed her order again, and sat down gently beside her: "Aunt Song..."

With a "slap", a firm and powerful slap hit Yu Yan's cheek. It seemed that it exhausted all of Song Rui's strength, so that she was trembling when she withdrew her hand.Yu Yan clearly saw this hand coming towards him, and if he wanted to, he could easily dodge it, but he didn't move and took it calmly.

"Auntie, if you want to hit me, you can hit me. I don't know how to defend, let alone resist." After saying this, Yu Yan was disgusted by her hypocrisy. The damage caused was pitifully small, "However, after you finish fighting, I still want to have a serious chat with you."

Song Rui didn't respond, but she didn't make any more moves either, she just lowered her head silently, like a statue.

Yu Yan took the lead and said, "I know, you may not be able to accept homosexuality for a while..."

When hearing the word "gay", Song Rui trembled slightly.

Yu Yan blinked, and continued: "I also know that this road is not easy to walk. Mothers love their children, so they definitely can't bear him to suffer like this."

Song Rui still didn't respond, but tears suddenly rolled out of her eyes, and finally fell into the vertical and horizontal ravines on her face.

"But the more this is the case, the more Tayun needs your support and encouragement. He left home impulsively that day, seemingly to vent his dissatisfaction with you, but in fact, it was because he was too eager to get your affirmation. "

Song Rui's hands that were originally flat on her knees curled up a little bit.

"And I assure you that I will take good care of him, sympathize with him, and try my best to give everything I can. You can rest assured that he will be with me..."

"You shameless thing." Song Rui finally spoke, turned her face and said to Yu Yan every word, "As a doctor, you are the best doctor in the world by coaxing patients to stay with you because of your position. shame."

The so-called Yu Yan sat still on the spot, and no more words could come out of that glib mouth.He just looked at Song Rui with eyes full of useless apology, like a student obediently listening to a teacher in front of a teacher.

But after saying this, Song Rui lowered her head again, tears streaming down her face.Yu Yan hesitated and handed the tissue to her, Song Rui tried to knock it off with her backhand, but paused in mid-air, and took it back a little stiffly.

Even though she is only in her early fifties, Song Rui looks much older than her peers.That face has probably never been maintained, the sallow skin is covered with wrinkles, the white hair is about to take over the black hair's territory, and the overly stooped and thin back makes people feel that she seems to be broken at any time.

After tears were shed, Song Rui said in a weak voice, "You can go."

"I……"

Yu Yan wanted to say something else, but Song Rui interrupted him with difficulty: "I know what you want to say. I have nothing to say. I won't support you, but I won't object, what do you think? So be it."

Perhaps this is already the most extreme concession, Yu Yan couldn't bear to stay here to provoke her any longer, so she stood up and said, "Take care of yourself."

When he got home, Song Tayun, who was supposed to stay in the second bedroom, unexpectedly sat on the sofa and waited for his return.After their eyes met, both of them narrowed down what the other wanted to say.

"You know everything?" Yu Yan took off her coat, and calmly stepped forward to sit beside him.

"You are really not very good at lying." Song Tayun smiled bitterly, "I swear, I have never seen your whereabouts for even a second since then. It's just that today, your demeanor is too abnormal, I couldn't help it, so I went to check it... I will delete it later."

"No need to delete it." Yu Yan stretched out her hand to cover his hand, "In the future, you can watch it anytime you want, but probably it's unnecessary, and I won't hide it from you anymore."

Song Tayun reluctantly nodded: "I've finished what I want to say, what about you, is there anything you want to tell me?"

Yu Yan sorted out her emotions, and told Song Tayun about today's conversation.His reaction was somewhat similar to Song Rui's, he curled up on the sofa a little bit, in a posture of seeking protection.

Finally, Yu Yan said: "...One more thing, I think you should take time to accompany her to the hospital for an examination. She seems to lose her balance easily when walking. Given her age, this is usually caused by cerebral blood vessels. symptom of a problem."

Song Tayun suddenly raised his head and looked at him. After a while, he nodded stiffly: "I see."

The whole afternoon, the two of them didn't say a word, and there seemed to be a subtle strangeness and embarrassment between them.Until dinner time, it was Yu Yan who spoke first: "Do you want to go back?"

Song Tayun, who was about to go to the kitchen to pour water, froze in place, and said softly after a while, "Okay."

The two of them drove to Song Rui's house again in the dark. Unlike last time, Yu Yan looked very calm, but Song Tayun looked nervous and fearful.

The old-fashioned residential houses did not have a doorbell, and Song Tayun did not bring a key. Yu Yan knocked lightly on the door, but there was no response.He smiled wryly, and he didn't know if it was because of his visit today that made her alert to this.

But as the knocks on the door became more and more frequent, there was still no answer from inside.Yu Yan looked at Song Tayun with some doubts: "Where does your mother usually go at this time?"

Song Tayun didn't answer, but pushed Yu Yan away roughly, and kicked the door.

The loud sound echoed throughout the corridor. Yu Yan glanced at him in surprise. After a while, he suddenly came back to his senses. He glanced around the corridor full of sundries, and found a rusty, blunt Passed over the old-fashioned kitchen knife that couldn't be used: "Try this."

Song Tayun took it without hesitation, stepped back half a step, swung his arm and smashed the door lock with a kitchen knife.The door lock, which was already quite old, opened unbearably when Song Tayun slammed it for the second time, and the wooden door creaked inward.

"Mom!" Song Tayun stumbled and rushed over, the kitchen knife fell to the ground with a clang, and Yu Yan quickly kicked it aside.

Song Rui seemed to have lost consciousness, she seemed to have fallen by the sofa, half of her body was leaning on the sofa, and half of her body fell to the ground.Hearing Song Tayun's shout, she raised her eyelids with great difficulty, but couldn't say a word.

Song Tayun was shaking uncontrollably, his mind went blank, a car key was suddenly thrown into his hand, Yu Yan stepped forward and hugged Song Rui: "Quick, go and open the car door."

Only then did Song Tayun regain his senses, and rushed downstairs quickly.Yu Yan followed closely behind, carefully protecting Song Rui's head, and rushed downstairs as fast and steadily as possible.As if to save time, Song Tayun actually drove the car to the bottom of the building without a license. Before Yu Yan could say anything, he put Song Rui into the back seat and quickly got into the driver's seat.

Along the way, Yu Yan didn't care about any traffic regulations, speeding and running red lights, and rushed towards the hospital at high speed. After a trip, the suspension of her driver's license would probably be easy.Song Tayun was sitting in the co-pilot, his whole body was still trembling uncontrollably. He couldn't say how much he loved Song Rui, but he really couldn't accept the possibility that she would leave him.

After successfully rushing to the emergency department of the hospital, the conscientious doctors quickly began to carry out rescue.The two waited anxiously on the bench in the corridor, and Yu Yan was relieved, and gently stroked Song Tayun's back.

"Will she die?" Song Tayun asked softly.

Yu Yan sighed softly, reached out and took Song Tayun's head into her arms, and whispered in his ear: "Don't think about these messy things, don't worry, she will be fine."

The test results came out soon, and Yu Yan guessed right, a sudden cerebral hemorrhage.However, due to timely medical treatment, Song Rui's current situation has stabilized after simple treatment.If the follow-up is well adjusted, there is great hope for a full recovery.

This was tantamount to luck in misfortune, Song Tayun's heart was relieved, as if the tight string had finally been torn, he buried himself in his knees and cried non-stop.The cry seemed to be vomiting from the depths of the body, with a bit of hysteria, maybe it wasn't just about Song Rui's matter.Yu Yan didn't dare to touch him for the first time, so she could only sit aside and watch him anxiously.

Later, the two were finally able to go into the ward to visit Song Rui.She still looks very weak, but at least she can speak. The first sentence is: "The bank card and passbook at home are stored in the compartment in the closet, and the password is your father's birthday..."

Song Tayun stood there, seemingly a little surprised. After Song Rui finished explaining the poor family background, he said, "Do you... have nothing else to say to me?"

Song Rui looked up at him, with rare kindness and apology in her eyes, and then she sighed a long time: "I may leave you at any time, it's good that you can find someone to take care of yourself."

Deja vu "is also very good".In a sense, this couple is really a match made in heaven.

Song Rui was discharged from the hospital soon, and Song Tayun moved back home.Yu Yan ran to his house whenever he had something to do, looking very attentive.Song Rui's attitude towards him was much better than before, or maybe she knew that she could only accept her fate.

Autumn passed like this, and on the day of Lidong, Yu Yan received the obituary for Lin Wanyin's funeral.

The scale of the funeral was small, at least in the legal sense, Lin Wanyin is still missing.Occasionally, Yu Yan would have an unrealistic expectation. If Professor Lin and Lin Wanyin really just disappeared, maybe one day, they would suddenly appear in front of her eyes.

The posthumous photo seemed to be a passport photo. Among the clusters of flowers, Lin Wanyin looked forward firmly, smiling confidently and calmly.It's just that the black and white tones cast a layer of haze on her that shouldn't be there.

At the funeral, Yu Yan saw Lin Wanyin's mother for the first time.She was wearing a white velvet hat, with a little cyan scalp exposed underneath, and she looked calm and calm, with a natural and easy look—even at her daughter's funeral.

Fang Xuhai also rushed over, taking his little sister with him.Compared with the photo, she has grown up a lot. After all, ten years have passed, and she has grown into a slim girl, but her eyes are crying into walnuts.

"Brother Yu, what are you going to do in the future?" Fang Xuhai couldn't help asking.

Yu Yan wanted to answer that he was preparing for the exam recently, but he looked into his little sister's eyes and shook his head involuntarily: "I haven't thought about it yet."

Hearing this answer, Song Tayun looked up at him silently.

As the mourner, Lin Wanyin's cousin gave a brief speech. His face was full of tiredness, and he was so choked up that he couldn't continue. Finally, he said: "... I hope my brave, intelligent, and kind sister can Rest in peace. We will always remember her dedication and she will always be in our hearts."

After the funeral, everyone dispersed in silence.When Yu Yan and Song Tayun were about to leave, Fang Xuhai suddenly caught up.

The three stood on the same ground and looked at each other. Fang Xuhai clearly wanted to say something, but he couldn't say a word.

"Xiao Hai." In the end, Yu Yan spoke first, "Are you interested? Come back to the hospital with me and continue working."

"Yes! Brother Yu, I can do it anytime!" As if he had been waiting for this sentence, Fang Xuhai agreed without hesitation.

For Yu Yan's decision, Song Tayun didn't seem surprised at all. He turned his head to look at Yu Yan with piercing eyes: "Doctor Yu, I want to be with you."

Yu Yan looked down at him, and his first reaction was actually to refuse, but slowly he suddenly figured it out, Song Tayun absolutely didn't need his unnecessary worries.

As the signature doctor of the hospital, the hospital of course fully supports Yu Yan's return.The previous complaint had already been withdrawn after understanding the situation.

Suddenly, it seemed like a very long dream, and everything went back to the beginning.It's just that at Yu Yan's request, there was no one to fill the vacant position.

On Yu Yan's usual plain desk, there are three more photos this time, one is of Professor Lin and sister Fang Xuhai, one is a photo of him and Fang Xuhai with Lin Wanyin before, and the other is of him and Fang Xuhai. A group photo of Song Tayun.

Song Tayun put on a white coat for the first time, and his brows and eyes were still green, but he looked heroic and free and easy, enough to stand shoulder to shoulder with Yu Yan.

The hospital is still crowded with people, and the three of them are tirelessly adventurously running around in every world.They peep into the hearts of others, and unintentionally, examine their own hearts over and over again.

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The author has something to say:

It's finally over now!I am very happy to be able to tell this story in its entirety according to my own plan.Personally, I still like this story very much, although for various reasons, the results presented seem a little unsatisfactory, and I will probably find time to overhaul it in the future (procrastination is too serious, I don’t know when I will start to repair it) _(:зゝ∠)__

It’s the first time I try to write a plot flow, and my big wish is to solve the problem that the writing can never be long, although it seems that it is still very short... Take it step by step and take it slowly XD

And, I am very grateful to QFZL for seeing every friend here.I am so grateful for every favorite and every comment!Although I am clumsy and often suffer from not knowing how to reply, I am very grateful for every comment you leave, whether it is a compliment or a suggestion, including spreading flowers and paws, I am very happy to receive every one~

Finally, Quietly Mimi advertised the new article "Rhapsody" (Paranoid Gong x Crazy Criticism), interested friends can poke a pre-order, memojiu!