restart breathing

The sloshing water in the bathtub gradually subsided.

Hearing Chen Fang's words, Lu Shiqing frowned and remained silent for a long time, still unable to understand the meaning of those fragmentary and illogical words.

Thinking to no avail, Lu Shiqing wrapped the person in a towel, carried him back to the bed from the bathtub, watched Chen Fang put on his pajamas slowly and wiped his hair as if nothing had happened, and felt that those broken words were grotesque and palpitating.

"Chen Fang." Lu Shiqing took the towel in Chen Fang's hand, stood in front of him and wiped his hair, "What did you mean just now? Pain, gland pain or where?"

"What?" Chen Fang was dazed, as if not only could not answer Lu Shiqing's doubts, but also did not understand what Lu Shiqing was talking about, nor did he know what he had just said.

Lu Shiqing sighed, wiped Chen Fang's hair with her hands for a moment, then continued, "It's okay. Dry off and go to bed."

"What about you?" Chen Fang asked in a low voice, "Are you leaving tonight?"

Different from the usual farewell, perhaps due to the instinctive dependence of the alpha and omega who had just finished marking, Lu Shiqing could hear the meaning of staying behind from Chen Fang's tone.

"Can you stay?" Lu Shiqing still asked what Chen Fang meant.

“Beds can be a bit small.”

"It's bigger than the dormitory of No. [-] Middle School." Lu Shiqing opened his mouth, as if realizing that he had slipped his words, and added: "The bed is not small."

There was a night light on by the bed.

In order to prevent the pheromone from affecting Chen Fang, Lu Shiqing put barrier stickers on the glands.

There was only one pillow on the bed, and Lu Shiqing rolled up his clothes and put them behind his head, lying next to Chen Fang, without closing his eyes for a long time.It is probably because the sleep disorders over the years have become a habit, and he did not bring sleeping pills with him, so it may be difficult to fall asleep tonight.

Seeing that Chen Fang's back was turned to him, Lu Shiqing put his hand under the pillow to feel around, making a rustling sound, then quickly withdrew his hand, turned his head slightly, as if wanting to look at him, but didn't really look at him, After a moment, he turned his head back.

The uneven breath indicated that Chen Fang hadn't fallen asleep, but he froze and didn't move, as if Lu Shiqing beside him was a beast that needed to be vigilant all the time, and he didn't dare to relax even for a moment.

Lu Shiqing wanted to reach out and hug him like before. Maybe they have been unfamiliar for too long, and familiar habits can help them fall asleep peacefully, but Lu Shiqing just curled up her fingers, pinched the corner of the quilt to wrap Chen Fang's thin shoulders, and there was no pain. Move again.

When he thought of the temporary mark again, Chen Fang's eyes almost overflowed with fear.

Perhaps it was because Chen Fang was afraid of alpha.

And he is alpha.

Lu Shiqing barely fell asleep when the morning came. Seeing the torrential rain in front of him, he knew that he was dreaming again, and even the direction of the connection was clear.

Mud, red rope, blood rain.

Only then did the relationship between him and Chen Fang ease, and he didn't want to experience such a scene again, even in a dream.

Lu Shiqing numbly opened her eyes, rubbed her swollen temples, turned her head to see Chen Fangan lying beside her quietly breathing evenly, her body huddled up, obviously in a posture of self-protection, even in sleep, her wrists It was carefully pressed against the chest.

Lu Shiqing's eyes darkened.

It turns out that even if you are awake, the nightmare that comes true still cannot escape.

Chen Fang's slender wrist bones protruded, and Lu Shiqing remembered that his snow-white skin was lined with bright red strings, which looked very good.The red rope was the marriage that Lu Shiqing begged for, and it was also put on by Lu Shiqing herself, and she wanted him to wear it for a lifetime.

But now the wrist is empty, and the hideous scar cut off the red rope, and instead, it became the pain that followed Chen Fang for a lifetime, and was carefully hidden by him, even becoming a subconscious habit.

Just like the school uniform collar he pulled up high in the past, it turned out to be a habit formed for self-protection.

He always hides himself.

But Lu Shiqing, who thought Chen Fang was by his side, realized at this moment that he might never have found him.

Lu Shiqing got up lightly, didn't even make any noise after changing clothes, and didn't wake Chen Fang up, looked at the time, and went out cautiously.

He thought he was going back and forth quickly enough, but when he entered the door again, he found that Chen Fang had also gotten up, and the head of the bed was in a mess.

Chen Fang fumbled around, as if he was eagerly looking for something. It seemed that because Lu Shiqing was by his side last night, he simply searched but failed, and he refused to give up after thinking about it all night.

The movement of searching followed the air stillness the moment Lu Shiqing came back and closed the door. Chen Fang turned around and watched Lu Shiqing go down the stairs, carrying buns and black rice porridge in his hand.

"Don't you want to sleep a little longer? Do you have something to do today?" Lu Shiqing deliberately didn't mention Chen Fang's interrupted behavior just now, and changed the subject. By the way, he set up the table naturally and put a simple breakfast on it.

"No, I just woke up." Chen Fang put his hands behind his back, as if hiding something in his hands, not daring to be discovered.

"En." Lu Shiqing didn't care, he knew that Chen Fang's hand was empty, so he just responded, "After washing up, let's eat."

"……it is good."

Seeing Chen Fang hesitantly walking into the bathroom, Lu Shiqing lowered his eyes, put his hand in his pocket with a gloomy expression, and touched a tube of injection that had been warmed by body temperature.

Of course he knew what Chen Fang was eagerly looking for, and naturally he knew that Chen Fang would not find it, but seeing Chen Fang's anxious and flustered appearance, he realized that Chen Fang's dependence on omega inhibitors did not seem to depend solely on the urgency of his glandular symptoms degree.Last night, he clearly gave Chen Fang an effective temporary mark. It stands to reason that Chen Fang will not have severe glandular reactions during this fever cycle, and Chen Fang himself seems to be in good condition.

Therefore, this dependence and abuse of inhibitors and the almost morbid fear of fever symptoms are probably due to psychology.

Most people with psychological disorders have suffered severe trauma or blows, and experienced unbearable pain that resulted in a collapse of the will. This effect will not be easily eliminated, just like a wound that heals over the years will eventually leave a scar.

Physical illness is easy to cure, but heart disease is difficult to cure.

Lu Shiqing is now a doctor, and he has a deep feeling for this truth, and because of this, he feels heavy and powerless.

So we can only try not to let things slip into the worst case.

Chen Fang came out after washing, with a few strands of wet hair on his forehead, and his eyes became wet. He sat at the table, picked up a cup of black rice porridge and drank it quietly, without making a sound or looking at Lu Shiqing. .

"How do you feel? Are you still uncomfortable?" Lu Shiqing asked.

"It's not uncomfortable." Chen Fang shook his head and continued to drink the porridge with his head down.

"Just tell me when you feel bad." Lu Shiqing looked at Chen Fang, "I won't leave you alone."

"Yeah." Chen Fang bit the straw and nodded.

"Don't use inhibitors indiscriminately." Lu Shiqing deliberately reminded.

"...Well." Chen Fang has always responded with kindness, and he doesn't know if he really listened to Lu Shiqing's words, after all, he has done a lot of bad things.

The two finished their breakfast very quickly. Chen Fang cleaned up and sat by the bed, watching Lu Shiqing put on his coat and prepare to go out. When it came time for the hospital to go to work on weekdays, he would go to practice.

"What do you want to eat tonight, you can call or text me." Lu Shiqing walked up to Chen Fang, knelt down and looked into his eyes.

"I'm not feeling sick anymore, I can cook dinner." Chen Fang said.

Lu Shiqing took Chen Fang's hand that was wringing the hem of his clothes, felt the hot flashes in his palm, smiled, and said, "I found a fried sugar cake near the hospital."

"Ah." Chen Fang bit his lip, his eyes lit up for a moment, as if he had some impression of this kind of delicacy that he used to eat in high school, longing for sweetness, but flinching.

Lu Shiqing reached into his pocket, took out the heated omega inhibitor syringe and put it in Chen Fang's hand.Chen Fang once again saw the inhibitor that should have disappeared under the pillow for no reason, no, it was not for no reason, it was discovered and taken away by Lu Shiqing.He lowered his eyes and curled up his fingers holding the needle, as if resisting some kind of temptation, and finally clenched it tightly.

"This inhibitor is reserved for you in case of emergency, but if you really listen to what I say, come to me directly if you have anything to do, and don't use it casually." Lu Shiqing said, "If the suppressant is still on when I come back at night, I'll buy you fritters."

Hearing this, Chen Fang's hand holding the inhibitor needle loosened slightly, his cheeks flushed a little, as if shy, and also seemed to be out of breath, pretending to calmly complain: "I'm not a child."

"You are not a child." Lu Shiqing stood up, bent down again, and planted a superficial kiss on Chen Fang's lips.

"You are not as obedient as a child."