Narcissus and Poison

Astor was too shocked to speak for a long time.

"...Your Highness," the knight raised his hand and rubbed his forehead before saying in a hoarse voice, "You are a prince with a bright future."

"I know," Augusta's eyes were a little red, he stared at his lover intently, "but..."

Without the throne, I can live as an ordinary person.I can do any job a civilian can do.

I just want to be with you without any scruples.

We are lovers.It is fair and reasonable.We are not living for the pleasure of the flesh.

Astmelo's face was pale, and in the faint candlelight, this robust young man looked extremely fragile.

"Your Highness," he smiled, but he didn't know that he was smiling so weakly, "You are just young, you like me very much... I like you too. However, physical pleasure is unreliable, the attachment of young people It's naive; you can't pay a disproportionate price for this friendship that has gone astray. You have more important things to do than talk about love...you will inherit the throne, or give the throne to your brother; You will marry a wife who is just like you, and you will have lovely children—and among them may be a future king. …

"Your Highness, you say you love me, but when you grow older, you will find that I am no different from other people... When I grow old, there will still be young and beautiful people who are more worthy of your favor. And I don't want you to neglect those who are waiting for you, for doing so will only bring you remorse."

"You say I'm selfish," Augusta said with tears streaming down her face, "but why can't I be allowed to live the life I want? Why can't I be with the people I love? "

Astor felt that what he said was cruel; he buttoned the last button of his shirt, and gently hugged the prince sitting on the bed/on the shoulder.Augusta raised his head, his beautiful clear eyes were filled with mist, and his loving eyes were mixed with resentment.

"You love me, okay," Astor whispered softly, "but we can't elope - okay? I love you, and I'd like to stay by your side until you get tired of..."

Augusta buried his tearful face deeply into Astor's embrace; he rubbed his cheek against his lover's skirt intimately, and the familiar scent of lavender calmed him down.He interrupted Astor, sobbing, "No! . . . I won't get tired!"

Astor's heart softened, and he reached out and stroked Augusta's hair—the gentle touch was like fine silk.Augusta trembled all over—every time he hugged Astor tightly, Astor would grab his shoulders while panting, or hug his head, his slender fingers followed him from time to time. Brutally hitting and stroking and rubbing his hair... For example, his hair is messed up now.

"Astor, I love you," Augusta pulled Astor's shoulder hard, making him lower his head a little closer to kiss his lips.

"I love you too...don't cry, it's childish," Astor smiled and broke away from this gentle and light kiss, "Augusta."

Augusta didn't even want to let go of the arms hugging Astor's waist, and buried his head on Astor's chest again, "I don't want others to see you as my subordinate, you are my knight, this It is your work; you are my love, and this has nothing to do with your work."

Augusta is very clever and decisive in handling official affairs, which is the quality of a monarch; but sometimes, like a sensitive child, he thinks too much and feels melancholy.Astor thought.

Astor comforted Augusta, like a small animal.

"You were so strong on the bed/on the bed, and now you come to my arms and cry?" Astor smiled, his voice was thick and pure, with a hint of hoarseness that is not easy to be noticed by others - only when he is emotional Only then was it fully exposed.This voice fascinated Augusta's heart as deeply as its owner (or this is also part of Astor's charm); when hearing this slightly provocative/teasing words, Augusta was a little lost , subconsciously pulled Astor.

"I'm going to be on duty," Astor smiled softly, and gently opened the prince's restless arm. "It's almost dawn, but you can sleep for a while."

Walking out of the prince's bedroom, Astor pretended to be calm and nodded to the saluting guards—it was common for the knight commander to watch at the door of the prince's room every day until dawn before leaving; no one thought of going anywhere else— No one has discovered the "truth".

Perhaps this is self-deception, but Astor does not know who dares to expose this matter... Ordinary soldiers and knights keep a considerable distance from the noble prince, and Astor firmly believes that Augusta was Beloved - he had never heard anything negative in the army or in the Knights. ——As for the others, it seems that even Prince Fernand and some frivolous noble children are not interested in Augusta, who is aloof from the world and cleans himself.

Astor walked towards his duty residence in the palace.

Walking; while recalling the conversation with Augusta that was close to a dispute, Astor's footsteps became heavy.

He held on to the wall, feeling a splitting headache.

He loves Augusta.

While he was hurting Augusta, the words he said also tore his heart.He knew that Augusta's love was single-minded and dedicated, but he made a gesture of contempt, thinking that he could be freed from the "sense of guilt" by doing so...

The knight commander wept silently.

Not because of grievances, pure sadness.

He hated himself who was indecisive, and also hated himself who trampled on the innocent and gentle love of the prince with low means.This is the torment of helplessness, and there is no room for resolution.What can I do? ...

Shursena appeared beside him without a sound.

"Master Astor..."

Astor was startled, raised his head blankly, and met a pair of probing eyes.

It was the first time that the knight commander showed panic in front of his subordinates; he hurriedly wiped his face, and forced a smile and said, "Last night, I drank a few too many drinks, I was a little hungover, and I had a terrible headache... It's really embarrassing."

Xiuer also smiled slightly, and said with concern: "It's just that my lord has been working too hard recently, so go back and rest for a while..."

"But……"

"I'll do the exercises for you this morning," Xiuer said, "Your priority is your body—don't let everyone worry about your health." His eyes were gentle and calm, which made Astor feel relieved for no reason.

"Thank you," Astor said gratefully.

Shursena blinked.

He watched the knight commander leave; his eyes darkened—until Astor's figure disappeared from his sight, he still stared thoughtfully at the direction Astor left.

In those eyes, there is lingering admiration, paranoid longing, and extremely suppressed madness.

The author has something to say: Shursena is a tragic pervert...but his tragedy is not just his ending.