love not love

After Zhan Tan and Shen Yi had dinner, he called a car for Shen Yi. After watching Shen Yi leave, he rubbed his brows tiredly, and then drove to Su Mu's house.

After he opened the door, he saw the only light source in the dark room, Su Mu sitting in a daze on the sofa closest to the TV.Zhan Tan closed the door softly, walked up to Su Mu and sat down quietly, originally he wanted to question Su Mu why he did that, Su Mu really did not leave him a way out, so He was very angry, but now seeing his baby like this, his heart softened.

He hugged Su Mu into his arms, only then did Su Mu realize that he was coming, Su Mu looked up at him, then found a comfortable position in his arms and leaned against him and said, "Brother, you are here".

Zhan Tan said helplessly, "If I don't come to you, you won't go to me. I can't bear you, so I came to you."

Su Mu smiled and said, "Brother, are you not angry?".

Zhan Tan rubbed Su Mu's soft hair and said, "I'm angry, but when I saw your sad look, I surrendered, because I know that the most sad person is our Mu Mu, who pushed his lover to others , you have to accept whatever happens in the future, because this is your decision, that’s what you think.”

Su Mu said, "Well, I still understand me."

Zhan Tan said with a distressed face, "Well, brother knows you best, so I know what to do will make you sad. Trust me, I will not do anything to make you sad."

Su Mu's eyes suddenly dimmed, and he said like a child who has done something wrong, "If it wasn't for me, brother would have a very beautiful and virtuous wife, after all, you are not purely gay."

Zhan Tan turned Su Mu's head up and looked at him and said, "Stupid, what's on your mind, I've been there since the moment I met you, as long as I can be with you, I can do anything. I love you just because you are you, regardless of your gender, if you were a woman, I would love you just the same."

Su Mu still said uninterestedly, "Then it would be fine if I were a woman, and you don't have to be so embarrassed."

Zhan Tan kissed Su Mu's forehead, he knew that his baby was turning a corner again, this was not the first time they had discussed such a thing, but each time they got the same result.Zhan Tan looked at Nobita and Doraemon on the TV screen and smiled and said, "You are 24 years old, and you still watch things that children watch."

Su Mu said bluntly, "No way, Su Yuning obviously wanted to watch it, so I watched it with him. If you don't believe me, you can ask him, but he is sleeping soundly now, you can ask him tomorrow."

Zhan Tan took Su Mu's hand and interlocked his fingers and said, "Well, I believe our family Mumu, and Mumu now tell brother, why do you think Su Yuning likes to watch "Doraemon"?"

Su Mu smiled enviously and said, "Because Nobita will give Nobita whatever Doraemon wants, so it looks very happy, and there will be whatever is lacking."

Zhan Tan said, "That's it, then it's good for Mumu to look at me, I will be Mumu's Doraemon".

Su Mu looked at Zhan Tan, and after a while he smiled and said, "Okay, Su Yuning needs a full-time mother, so help me create one."

Zhan Tan said, "Aren't I a father and a mother at the same time, Su Yuning doesn't have a mother."

Su Mu said, "You are lying, you can't do such a simple thing, and you still have to boast about it."

Zhan Tan looked at Su Mu seriously and said, "I'm asking what you want, and you answer me honestly."

Su Mu looked a little evasively and said, "I can have anything I want, and I will go for it myself, besides, I am very greedy, and I can't give me what I can't get by myself."

Zhan Tan hugged him tightly and said, "Although I'm not as powerful as Doraemon, I can give you what you want with a light hand, but as long as it's what you want, no matter how long it takes I'll do it for you. I know what you want, baby, don't lose faith in me okay, that day is not far away."

Su Mu took a deep breath of Zhan Tan's scent and said, "I know, I will wait for you, I don't think I will fall in love with anyone in this life except you, so my only choice is to wait for you."

Zhan Tan said with some concern, "Mumu, I plan to listen to you and marry Shen Yi, but don't worry, I have learned about Shen Yi's situation, she has someone she likes and waits for, so there is no way between me and her. What's the matter. And she said that as soon as the person she was waiting for appeared, she would divorce me, so I will hurry up on our affairs."

Su Mu was obviously stunned for a moment and said, "Well, I know, this is all in my expectation. Speaking of which, more than half of the reasons for this incident are due to me, so I have no opinion."

Zhan Tan said distressedly, "Baby, if you are sad, just say it, you don't need to pretend in front of me, it will be very tiring, and I will feel distressed too."

Su Mu yawned and said, "I won't feel tired if you don't tell me you're tired. Brother, I'm tired and I want to sleep."

Zhan Tan could only smile and said, "Okay, let's go to bed now."After being together for so long, Zhan Tan only saw Su Mu cry once, that was when they met for the first time. I remember that he still hated Su Mu at that time. No matter how a big man cried, he felt very unmanly.But after being with Su Mu, he still hoped that Su Mu would cry a few more times and not keep those bad emotions in his heart, he would coax him anyway.

Su Mu bit his lip and thought for a long time, "Brother, I want you to carry me back to the room".

Zhan Tan looked at Su Mu dotingly and said, "You little slacker, you've only walked a few steps, and you can't walk anymore."

Su Mu sat on the sofa but couldn’t get up and said, “It’s fine if you don’t recite it. If you don’t recite it, I’ll sleep on the sofa tonight. You said you would recite it for the rest of your life. You won’t do it after only a few steps. You can still grow in your life."

Zhan Tan squatted in front of Su Mu and said, "Come on, our little prince is going to drive back to bed."

The corners of Su Mu's mouth rose, and he jumped onto Zhan Tan's broad and strong back in satisfaction. Zhan Tan walked slowly with Su Mu on his back and said, "It's really like Zhu Bajie carrying his wife."

Su Mu smiled and said, "You still want to take advantage of me, and you yourself have become a pig".

Zhan Tan said, "What's wrong with Zhu Bajie, as long as you are willing to be my wife, I can be Zhu Jiujie."

Su Mu fell silent, he raised his head to keep his tears from falling, obviously the journey from the living room to the bedroom took less than 30 seconds, but Zhan Tan insisted on walking for more than three minutes.When I got to the bedroom, I didn’t put Su Mu down, just carried it like that. After Su Mu cleared up his emotions, he smiled and said, “Why, I told you to recite it just now and you still didn’t. Now you are addicted to it, and you can’t even put it down.” .

Zhan Tan said, "Well, every time I carry it on your back, you are reluctant to let it go, and you want to carry it like that for the rest of your life."

Su Mu sniffed Zhan Tan's body and said with disgust on purpose, "Put me down quickly, the smell of smoke on your body is killing me, and you don't listen to me, you smoked too much today, you, hurry up and take a bath."

Zhan Tan knew that his baby was going to hide from the rhythm of crying, so he obediently put Su Mu on the bed, helped Su Mu cover the quilt and said, "Then I'll take a bath, if you're tired, go to bed first, Don't wait for me."

Su Mu said impatiently, "Got it, you don't talk that much in front of outsiders, did you save everything you said to them, and then use it to curse me, I don't think you are Zhu Bajie, are you Tang Monk".

Zhan Tan smiled, picked up the bathrobe and went to take a bath. Seeing Zhan Tan go to take a bath, the smile on Su Mu's face collapsed, and his big peach eyes were immediately moistened with tears.He knew he shouldn't cry, because he asked for it and it was none of other people's business, so he had no right to cry in front of Zhan Tan.

But he still can't help it, as long as he thinks that in the account book of Zhan's family in the future, there will be someone in the column of Zhan Tan's wife, and someone else's name will be filled in.He has to be Zhan Tan's best man, because this is Zhan's mother's wish.He would watch Zhan Tan take wedding photos with others, say sacred vows with others, and go on honeymoon with others.And the saddest thing is that the things that he feels sad are things that are worthy of blessing in the eyes of others.But the things he feels happy are the disgusting things in other people's mouths. His sorrow cannot compete with the blessings of those others, and his happiness cannot compete with the disgust of those others.

When Zhan Tan came back from the shower and saw Su Mu wrapped himself in the quilt, he deliberately opened the door loudly, and sure enough, the person in the quilt moved slightly, and he knew that it was Su Mu who was wiping his tears.If Su Mu doesn't want him to know, even if he knows, he will pretend not to know, otherwise his baby will not dare to hide under the quilt and cry.

Seeing that the person under the quilt was not moving, Zhan Tan walked over and lifted the quilt to lie down. He pulled the quilt off his baby's head, only to see Su Mu's eyes were red, and he was closing his eyes and pretending to be asleep.Seeing the pain in his heart, Zhan Tan kissed the "sleeping" Su Mu as usual, then lay down next to Su Mu, and hugged Su Mu tightly into his arms.

Su Mu's body was lying in Zhan Tan's arms a little stiffly, he was not very good at pretending, so pretending to be asleep or something was really weak.Fortunately, Zhan Tan soon fell asleep, listening to Zhan Tan's long breathing, Su Mu's body also returned to nature.

He stretched out his hand and touched Zhan Tan's face, starting from the thick eyebrows, then the pair of eyes that concealed affection, then the high bridge of the nose, and finally his fingers rested on Zhan Tan's thin lips.Looking at Zhan Tan, he cried, and then cried and printed his lips on Zhan Tan's lips.

He just kissed lightly, and his tears fell drop by drop on the corner of Zhan Tan's eyes. From now on, he will not be his pillow person.Suddenly Zhan Tan opened his mouth and rolled his tongue in, he was startled, and then realized that Zhan Tan was also pretending to sleep.

After Zhan Tan kissed enough, he let go of Su Mu. Zhan Tan helped Su Mu dry his tears with his warm thumb, kissed Su Mu's eyes and said, "Baby, it's not that I don't want you to cry, it's that you cry too much tonight." It hurts me to see it. If you are really unhappy, tell me, if you continue to cry, I will cry too."

Hearing what Zhan Tan said, Su Mu lay on Zhan Tan's chest and cried, "Brother, I know it's my fault. What happened today was caused by me, so I have no right to blame you, and I don't have the face to blame you." I cry in front of you, but when I think that you will belong to someone else in the future, I feel uncomfortable, so uncomfortable that I can't breathe."

Zhan Tan put his arms around him and patted him on the back and said, "If you don't believe me, if this matter really makes you feel so uncomfortable, let's not do it, and I will explain it to my mother tomorrow."

Su Mu hurriedly pulled Zhan Tan, as if Zhan Tan was going now, he hurriedly said, "Don't go, I just can't accept it now, it will be fine in a few days, brother, promise me not to tell mom."

Zhan Tan looked at Su Mu who looked at him pitifully and said softly, "Okay, brother, I listen to you, but don't be sad anymore."

Su Mu hurriedly wiped away his tears and said, "Okay, I will listen to my brother. Don't be sad, brother, you will keep your promise."

Zhan Tan leaned over and said to Su Mu forehead to forehead, "Okay, then baby, you go to bed first, brother go take a bath."

Su Mu pulled Zhan Tan and said, "Didn't you wash it just now? I don't want you to leave me."

Zhan Tan smiled and said, "But just now I was soiled by your tears and snot again, baby, I like how clingy you are like Yu Ning."

Su Mu was a little embarrassed, and said with a guilty conscience, "There are tears, but there is absolutely no snot."After speaking, he turned on the light and saw that Zhan Tan's chest was wet. He said a little embarrassedly, "There is no need to wash these tears. I will wipe them with paper for my brother."After speaking, he took the paper from the bedside table and began to help Zhan Tan wipe it.

After wiping it off in a short while, Su Mu lay back in Zhan Tan's arms, rubbed against him and fell asleep after a while, Zhan Tan looked at Su Mu who was sleeping like a piglet, and fell asleep with a sigh.

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