Help each other with "silence"

Shen's father's story ([-]):

That year, I escaped everything with words and came to this small town.

She settled here with her who was three months pregnant.

I thought that gradually everything would be fine.

However, after giving birth to Xiao Mo, she began to change.

No, maybe I changed in the first place.

become evasive.

When Xiao Mo was 15 years old, she confessed to me just after entering high school.

I will always remember the love that completely disappeared and the only guilt left in her black eyes at that time.

She is in love with someone else.

She said that she didn't like such a secluded life, and she didn't like such a life of leisure and nothing to do every day.

She said she wanted to leave.

I remember, I was silent for a long time.

Maybe it's because of my temperament, too reticent, too inarticulate, that she may feel bored.

In the end I said, can I wait until Xiao Mo goes to college?

At that time, she looked at me for a long time.

In the black eyes, there is hesitation and reluctance.

She is still reluctant to part with Xiaomo, I know.

Although she no longer loves me, she still loves Xiao Mo, I know that.

Perhaps, I used this to keep her by my side as much as possible for the last three years.

Very selfish.

If I knew later that Xiao Mo would become like this because of this incident, I would definitely not have said so.

I always do the things I regret repeatedly, constantly.

I never thought that she would choose to leave on the day Xiao Mo came of age.

Maybe she no longer remembers, or maybe she chose that day on purpose.

I want Xiao Mo to remember.

I never thought that Xiao Mo was stronger than me.

I didn't go to see her off, I just lay quietly on the bed listening to the sound of her leaving without saying a word.

So I don't know, Xiao Mo who is stronger than me followed out.

On such a snowy day and such a cold night, she stood in the snow and watched her mother leave.

I have no such courage.

And because of my cowardice again, when I got up in the morning, I found Xiao Mo at the door who had been cold and fainted.

I didn't cry the night she said she didn't love me anymore, and I didn't cry the night she left silently.

However, when I held Xiao Mo, who was cold and biting to the bone, and ran to the hospital with her in my arms, I cried.

Presumptuously, in the cold street in the early morning, tears fell into ice.

I was wrong again.

If I wasn't so cowardly, if I could be even a little bit stronger, I would follow, and Xiao Mo wouldn't almost leave me.

Forever, leave me.

Even with the door closed, Xiao Mo, who was dressed thinly, was severely frostbitten, and the cold hurt his internal organs.

I looked at the lights of the emergency room, and sat at the door, like a wandering beggar, begging God not to take Xiao Mo away, and crying bitterly.

Humble and regretful.

Perhaps God wanted to give me another chance, so he returned Xiao Mo to me.

It is Xiao Mo who is often tortured by the cold.

He returned Xiao Mo to me, but let me see her in pain and weakness, and there was nothing I could do.

Perhaps, he was reminding me of my cowardice and mistakes in this way.

I took Xiao Mo to various hospitals every day, looking for ways of Chinese medicine, and slowly nourishing Xiao Mo's body.

Three years, it took me three years to get Xiao Mo's body back to normal, and to alleviate that hateful cold disease.

But let that one person destroy everything.

When I received a call from the hospital and ran to see Xiao Mo's pale face and the familiar cold temperature of his palms, I was always so weak that I could only cry.

Three years, I spent three years to make Xiao Mo no longer have to be tortured frequently, but because of that woman's momentary thought, everything was destroyed.

I should have known earlier, because of family and body reasons, Xiao Mo has become withdrawn and silent, becoming as indifferent as her name.

But she has always been so kind.

So kind, always being hurt by others, but licking the wound by himself.

I hated that person, but I hated myself far more than I hated her.

I always hated myself so much for being cowardly, hating myself for not being able to bear anything for Xiaomo, hating myself for watching her suffer, listening to her say "Daddy, it's okay" and then hiding aside and crying.

When will I be left with only tears.

After that day, Xiao Mo rested for two years, dropped out of school, and went around the world by herself. I could only beg for someone to accompany her, love her, and worry about her body at the same time.

She was out and about for three years and then came back.

I found a job in Beijing, and would go home to accompany me during holidays, but I was always alone.

I always tell her: "Girl, don't always live alone, you need to find someone who can accompany you and take care of you."

She always smiles and says hello.

I was thinking that no one would be able to truly understand Xiao Mo.

However, on New Year's Eve a year ago, Xiao Mo came back and brought five girls with him.

I can see that Xiaomo is happy to be with them.

I can also understand that the woman named Gu Yimo loves her.

When I saw Xiao Mo's smile, I thought that this woman was it.

That's the person I've been waiting with Xiao Mo for several years, the one who can truly love her.

I thought, this time, I couldn't be wrong.

However, I always think so, and then make mistakes again and again.

When Xiao Mo came back that day and took away the original design she asked me to keep, when I saw her sigh in amber with the same color as mine, I was afraid.

I'm afraid, even this time, I'm wrong.

I understand that things like love, if they are wrong, cannot be rescued by outsiders.

If so, I was wrong this time.

I can only go back to those years again, and I can only look at her silently, looking at the daughter I should have cared for with my life, suffering alone there.

However, nothing can be done.

And now, I can't lie to myself anymore.

Yes, I was wrong again.

And, it's so wrong.