My historian is dying every day

When Li Gengnian returned to Xueyuan Station after his tour of Dulong Pass, it was the eighth day when Shen Youfang left with the caravan.

Formed Qingqi into the camp, the heavy snow has not stopped, he got off the horse and unplugged the water bag, while unplugging to drink water, watching the little soldier rush to lead the horse for him with a blushing face, accidentally spilled water A few drops of water stained on the cloak, and the wind blew the fur into tiny needles, causing him to raise his hand and pat it twice. He frowned and asked the soldier, "A letter from the caravan?" without?"

Xiaobing nervously held the rein of the horse and said, "Responding to my lord's words, Boss Shen's caravan sent a letter in the morning, saying that they will be able to return later today."

"Today?" Li Gengnian put the cork back on the water bag when he heard the words, he seemed to smile for a moment, but the corner of his mouth pulled down again: "When is later?"

Xiaobing shrank his neck under his unfriendly gaze: "Return to the adults, I don't know. The letter was sent by Boss Shen, and it didn't say..." The bird can't speak human words either.

Before he could finish speaking, Xiao Bing had heard the officer in front of him throwing his sleeves aside and groaning coldly on his hips. The next moment, the officer in charge stopped asking questions, and only strode towards the big house in the camp, all the way up and down. It seemed that he suddenly had a temper.

In the bitter new wind, there was a faint murmur of hatred.

"... Shen Youfang, that bastard, what kind of broken bird does he raise!"

It was still snowing and it was quite cold, but when Li Gengnian walked to the gate of the house, he didn't rush in. He looked up and saw a round yellow sun hanging in the middle of the sky, it was strangely dazzling, and he didn't know when it would set down.

Thinking of this, after entering the door, the servants came to ask him to eat, and he didn't bother to answer. He jumped up to the eaves with just a touch of his toes, and sat cross-legged on the highest place in the largest and best house with a radius of a hundred miles, sucking. His nose, which was blown red by the wind, gradually stared in a daze at the far away place where the snow had crossed that day——

Plain snow falling, white mist, glaciers meandering, cold mountains deserted and independent.

There are a few scattered villages on the snow field, wisps of cooking smoke are floating in the camps, the sky is blue and the clouds are rolling, the wind has blown, and there is no sound for an hour and a half in all directions.

The snowfield is very peaceful, he and Shen Youfang have traveled all the way north here, the years have passed silently, and now they have passed six years in peace.

In the first two years of the six years, Shen Youfang often asked him if he felt the weather was cold, if he felt that the daily life was boring, and if he felt the bleakness around him, even if he asked him whether he liked it here, he never Answered - he only ran out of the mansion holding Shen Youfang's sleeves to ride horses aimlessly under the star river at dusk in the thin spring, and pushed him to take a lot of money to camp next door in exchange for sweetness in the scorching sun of midsummer Watermelons, in the shadow of the moon in late autumn, shared with him a roasted goose caught in a long river, and sat here when the winter snowstorm came, waiting for him to replenish and return home.

The snow field is naturally cold, boring, and indeed desolate.There is no need for anyone to answer these questions, they existed normally, so from the third year onwards, Shen Youfang gradually stopped asking questions, but this person never cared about giving up so easily, and kept warming the tent at night while being intimate. Occasionally, she raised her finger to tease his face and asked, "Then, are you happy now?"

There is no answer to this question in bed—because Shen Youfang always asks him softly after his waist is numb and his legs are numb. At this time, he is confused. To make you happier", if it is said to be unhappy, then "to make you happy", in the end it is always Li Gengnian's body who suffers, as if it doesn't matter if you are happy or not, after a lot of drawing until the end, He was trapped in the sea of ​​desire, and he didn't know whether he was crying with joy or pain. He clasped his ten fingers and scratched Shen Youfang's back cruelly, but he heard the person on his body gasping and hissing in pain, and chuckled softly. A deep kiss fell on the forehead, and beside his ear was his familiar words: "Li Gengnian, you look good when you smile, and you look even better when you cry."

In the twilight, the hanging tassels swayed lightly while the roof was shaking, Li Gengnian's heart was itching all over his body, his fingers were about to break Shen Youfang's hand, he must have scolded him, but he also scolded him every day because of various things, Laughing, spending his money and playing tricks on him, spending night after night.

Sometimes, being happy and liking are actually two different things.

Li Gengnian had never thought about this before, and he never even felt that it was difficult to answer when asked. Therefore, when he came here with the army ten years ago to suppress the rebellion, Qi Zheng also asked him if he liked Xueyuan. Whether he is happy or not, he can say without thinking: "I like it, I am happy, how nice it is here."

"What's the matter?" Qi Zheng stared at him with a distressed expression at that time, "People have to walk two miles to fetch water, the sun is poisonous in summer, and the cold breaks bones in winter, I don't know if you like it Where is it?"

At that time Li Gengnian heard it, smiled smirkly, and said, "How can I compare with Master Hou, I'm probably born to be a hard worker." After thinking about it for a moment, he added seriously: "Either I will make a living in the future. Dive into the camp, and come here later to be a military supervisor."

"Nonsense." Qi Zheng finally couldn't help it anymore, pointing at his head and laughing, "If you can become a military supervisor, then my old Qi's family is about the same. What kind of golden chair, wash it off and go to sleep."

"What are you talking about?" Li Gengnian pushed his hand away and laughed even more, "Then I will make it again for you to see."

Hearing this, Qi Zheng looked at him reluctantly leaning on the tall horse, and after a while, he turned his head and cast his eyes from the yellow sand in the far field to some irrelevant clouds in the sky, smiled lightly, and said lightly: "Okay, then I will Wait, Li Jianjun will owe me a cup of promotion wine when the time comes, don't forget."

At that time Li Gengnian didn't feel how bitter these words were, he just nodded his head in agreement, and even felt that Qi Zheng had really fulfilled his wish, so he was not unhappy in his heart, and this Xue Yuan and the supervising army meant nothing to him. What is the good thing - later on, he realized that Qi Zheng didn't understand, but he never had a chance to tell Qi Zheng properly.

After Qi Zheng left, this place of thousands of miles of white snow or yellow sand was like a cemetery in his eyes, and the happy memories of the old days were all tinged with blood, tears and pain.For him, this snowfield became a dark and empty shell after all, if there were any traces inside, each trace must be poisonous sores.

Countless times in his delusional dreams he saw the full moon that was bleeding coldly that night, hallucinated countless times about the poisonous arrow piercing his arm, and was tortured by the sticky blood seeping through the back of his clothes in nightmares countless times—in dreams , as if he still had a chance to carry Qi Zheng behind his back, he rode away secretly, but behind him, the endless blood on Qi Zheng's body still seeped into every inch of his clothes irrevocably.

Even in his dream, he could still hear clearly——

"Li Niannian...you, let me down..." Qi Zheng said, "Hurry up...you run away..."

During the bumps, Qi Zheng struggled with his hands tied around his waist. Once Li Gengnian realized it, he panicked and became terrified. He just took his hand out of the rein and squeezed his wrist tightly, like crazy Shouting: "Don't move! Don't move! We're almost there, Hou—Master Hou, the camp is almost here! Look, it's almost here, right in front of you..."

——But in fact, the road ahead is gloomy and bleak, and they don't know how long they will arrive at the camp.

Qi Zheng was restrained by him, finally unable to struggle any more, in the gust of wind passing by his ears as he galloped, Li Gengnian heard his low-pitched laugh.

"...you are too stubborn." Qi Zheng said.

"Li Gengnian, you are so stubborn..."

The road ahead was foggy at that moment.Li Gengnian finally couldn't hear what he said, he didn't know whether he was screaming or crying.

He only clearly remembered that Qi Zheng finally finished speaking Xu Xu's exhortations, and then for a moment, he suddenly tightened the arms tied around his waist, and suddenly hugged him tightly, as if to use up the last last breath of his life strength.

At that moment, he thought that Qi Zheng was going to say the four words after all, but Qi Zheng didn't say them until the end, and at the end, Qi Zheng tried his best to keep the last breath in his ear, but It's really just four words: "...this is very good."

In this world, how many years, how many winds and rains, how many green plums have been boiled into winter plums, and finally turned this word into two things-one is broken in the warm wine of Midsummer Dream, and the other is Condensed on the cold branches facing the snow at the end of winter, each of them has experienced thousands of seasons, and each experienced thousands of joys and sorrows. For ten years, silently and deeply, separated by the thousands of miles of secluded springs.

Destiny is so decisive that it cannot be resisted. Once you get it, you hold it for a short time. Once you lose it, it is lonely and eternal.Those who used to be happy and cared less about sorrow, all the green leaves in their fortunes have never decayed, and the joy in their hearts never wants to turn around. It will come, and those who want to stay by my side will definitely be able to stay.

But people, are you stupid, have you never thought about——

Heaven has never cared whether people like it or not, whether they are happy or not.

Li Gengnian shook off a shoulder of snow on the roof, and on the snow field looking north as far as the eye could see, a group of traveling merchants walked slowly against the cold wind.

The white fur coat on the leader's body was stained with the color of snow, and he couldn't distinguish it from the surroundings. Finally, he gradually lowered his eyebrows and walked under the square eaves. Then he raised his head and saw Li Gengnian, and the usual composure appeared on Su Dan's face. He said with a smile: "Li Jianjun, at the beginning it was said that you built the house and repaired the earth dragon, but it turned out that you were the one who was still sitting on the roof during the heavy snowstorm. It is really a waste of Shen's filial piety."

Li Gengnian laughed when he heard the words, rubbed the back of his hand against the tip of his nose, got up and jumped down the eaves lightly. For a moment, the dark red prison coat on his body was like a red blood plum blossom flying down. In the blink of an eye, it had fallen. On the snow branch of the best tree in the world.

He raised his head and looked into Shen Youfang's eyes, but before he spoke, his eyes suddenly turned a little red.Shen Youfang just kept hugging him like this, and asked for a moment: "What are you thinking in your mind?"

Li Gengnian raised his hand and brushed off a trace of white fluff between his brows, and said with a straight face: "Of course I want to pay you boss Shen a lot of money this time, why don't you hurry up and send it to honor our supervisor!"

"You only want money?" Shen You Fanghuan's hands around his waist tightened slightly, and his smile deepened.

Li Gengnian looked at him and nodded, "Well, naturally I only thought about money."

"Okay," Shen Youfang lowered his eyes and brought him into his arms and hugged him deeply. He patted his back and said while holding back a smile, "Okay, I'll give it to you, I'll give it all to you."

At noon, the bright yellow sun disc, as if it was taken away by someone to break up the color and then wiped it back at will, has turned into layers of oranges that smudge the clouds, causing the strong wind in the north to slowly blow away. Blow, it's as if the sky is on fire in a blink of an eye.

After the little farewell, Chuchu's intimacy passed by, Li Gengnian stood still and did not leave, Shen Youfang followed his gaze to look at the sky, and said clearly: "Want to see for a while?"

Li Gengnian said without squinting: "If you want to see it, I can accompany you to see it."

Shen Youfang laughed: "Okay, I want to watch it, then please ask Supervisor Li to watch it with me for a while."

Li Gengnian turned his head to look at him, his eyes moved, and then he spread out his right hand and said, "Okay, then don't you thank me?"

Seeing this, Shen Youfang smiled habitually and took out a piece of gold leaf and put it on his hand: "Caomin thanked Supervisor Li."

Li Gengnian put the gold leaf back into his arms, "It's easy to say, easy to say." Then he raised his hand to the roof: "Boss Shen first."

Shen Youfang held back his laughter for a moment, so that he couldn't even use his light skills, so he first asked someone to fetch a hand-made stove, and after he and Li Gengnian kicked off the snow slag on the roof and sat down, he made Li Gengnian's two hands turn red from the cold Tucking his paws in, he said, "I never thought about it before. Your virtue of squatting on house beams cannot be changed. You might as well build a pavilion here."

Li Gengnian was taken aback: "...huh?"

"I said to build a pavilion on this roof." Shen Youfang raised his hand and touched his head, put his cloak hat on for him, and rubbed his cold ears, "At least in the future when the wind is strong, we can Cover it with a cotton curtain, and there will be a place to put wine in summer."

Hearing this, Li Gengnian looked at him speechlessly for a long time, sniffed his nose and turned his head away, staring at the setting sun with staring eyes and said: "You can do whatever you want, if you really want to fix it, I won't stop it."

Shen Youfang looked at him like this, couldn't stop laughing again, nodded repeatedly and said: "Yes, I want to fix it, I really want to fix it, thank you Supervisor Li for your permission."

Li Gengnian glanced at him out of the corner of his eyes, raised his chin slightly, and finally a vague smile appeared on the corner of his mouth: "Come on, excuse me, you're the only one who talks too much."

So Shen Youfang really stopped talking, and just sat beside him indifferently, watching the unknown sunset with him, but at this time the sun was turning slightly, the wind and snow between the sky and the earth gradually stopped, and after a while, the surroundings melted When it snowed, Shen Youfang, a martial artist like him, felt a chill run up his back, but he looked at Li Gengnian in a blink of an eye, but he was still sitting cross-legged, and the picture was still plain after six years. There was no sadness or joy on his face, and there was an indescribable tranquility under the sky. The next moment, he felt a hand that had been warmed by the stove, and whose fingers were still covered with calluses.

Li Gengnian didn't look back at him, but just tightened his fingers a little more, and then a little tighter.

After a while, Shen Youfang heard him say a word softly:

"That's good."

Shen Youfang folded his free other hand on the back of his hand, covered him for a while, and asked him: "What's so good about Xueyuan, Li Gengnian."

Li Gengnian blinked his eyes, squinted to watch the sunset sinking into the distant mountains, and finally said calmly: "Look at the sun, don't look at me."

"I'm watching." Shen Youfang shook his head and smiled, Ruyan looked towards the setting sun, "You tell me."

He held Li Gengnian's hand, and he said: "Hey, when I was young, maybe seven or eight years old, when I first entered the Imperial City Division, I always thought it was boring to be a secret guard and go to the room every day, so my master asked me , the sun also goes up to the sky every day. Do you think the sun is interesting? I said it is interesting. Without it, the world would be blind. It goes up to light the way for people. My master listened, Coke At that time, he actually coaxed me and said: "Think about it, then our secret guards are also the sun, and the master is concerned about the safety of the master, so the master will go to benefit the people of the world, and the world will be prosperous and peaceful. Do you think the secret guards are interesting?"

Speaking of this, he old Shen smiled: "Don't say it, I heard what he said at the time, and I thought the secret guard was really interesting."

"It's because you haven't read enough books, so stupid." Shen Youfang looked at him with a smile, "Then what happened after that?"

"Later," Li Gengnian said after years of ups and downs in his mind, "later because of what my master said, I kept looking at the sun, and gradually I felt that I was not the sun, and I wanted to know why the sun doesn't shine for others Now, what to do again. At that time, I also went to the princess mansion. After hearing this, Qi Zheng told me that the sun was shining by itself for fun. I asked him, is this interesting? ?”

Shen Youfang asked: "Then what did he say?"

Li Gengnian actually laughed when he thought about it: "Qi Zheng said, then only Sun himself knows."

Shen Youfang listened to his chatter, and looked at the sunset on the edge of the mountain, which seemed to be somewhat clear at this moment.But Li Gengnian suddenly seemed not to know how to express what he was thinking. At this moment, he fell silent, only seeing that the setting sun had completely sunk into the ground and could no longer be seen, he was finally enlightened, and finally said: "Shen Youfang , there are too many things outside, people always think about what to live for, but in the snowy field, it is enough to just think about living."

"You don't just want to live." Shen Youfang raised his hands and pinched his ears, and made a joke with a smile to tease him: "No wonder you like to watch the sunset, you've been waiting for my sunset so you can take over my family. "

"Nonsense." Li Gengnian stared at him with wide eyes, his thoughts were really distracted by this sentence, and he muttered: "Isn't your good family property also mine, no...not so."

At this time, there was a strange grunt between the two of them. Li Gengnian covered his stomach and looked at Shen Youfang calmly.

Shen Youfang raised his eyebrows and looked at him with the corners of his lips curled up: "Let's eat, Supervisor Li."

Li Gengnian withdrew his paw from his hand, patted his clothes and stood up, "All right, you... If you are really hungry, I will accompany you to eat two bites."

The next moment his back felt warm, his waist tightened, and suddenly the scene in front of him flew wildly, it was Shen Youfang who had hugged him and landed on the ground outside the eaves.

"Yes, I'm hungry, Lord Superintendent, let me have two bites together."

That night, the stove in the large house in the camp was warm, and there was a plum blossom outside the gray wall and blue tiles. The plum was about to bloom and the snow was about to melt. It seemed that spring was coming.