call me palatan

It was just an ordinary night like countless nights, but Chi Tan waited from eight o'clock to ten o'clock without waiting for Fu Quming's reply.He thought that if Fu Quming had something to do, he would also tell him.But it's just what it should be. What position does he have to ask Fu Quming to come back to him every day? If there is something urgent... He is so anxious, but he has no way of knowing, so he can only wait wildly. After waiting for a long time, his heart There were a lot of grievances that shouldn't have been born.He was really angry, but it wasn't entirely because of Fu Quming's sudden release of pigeons. The main reason was that he suddenly felt that he expected too much from Fu Quming...

Chi Tan used to have a very good friend who grew up together, but it wasn't Xiaohua Xiaohua, it was the first friend he made when he lived in the county with his parents, named Li Xu.Li Xu's family background is similar to his own. They met through adults. They live in the same community and study in the same elementary school, so they often go to and from school together.It's really inseparable and talk about everything.However, Chi Tan knew faintly from a very young age that Li Xu didn't seem to like him very much.Because once when he and Li Xu were chasing and playing in the training area of ​​the community, Li Xu suddenly fell and threw Chi Tan, who was running in front, to the ground without warning.Because Li Xu was standing in the grass at that time, but Chi Tan was in front of the cement edge of the green belt, so he fell and knocked off his front teeth, but Li Xu was fine.

Chi Tan didn't deliberately doubt him, it was just because Li Xu's gaze when he came to help him was so unforgettable for him.He obviously fell down suddenly just now, but he didn't have any panic, and even was a little excited, and couldn't help laughing, as if he had been waiting for this moment for a long time, which really made Chi Tan shudder.

Even so, Li Xu, who always said to adults "I'm sorry, I accidentally knocked Chi Tan down", was Chi Tan's best friend at that time, so good that he always received a certificate from his father because of his good grades. Mom will tell Li Xu exactly how much pocket money she has received.It's not that Chi Tan is showing off, it's that Li Xu loves to ask, and when he asks, Chi Tan will answer honestly.And every time at this time, Li Xu would show a very envious expression, and said: "Oh, it's a pity that I'm really not interested in studying, and I can't achieve your grades anyway." Li Xu is not only himself Not interested in studying, in fact, he always pulls Chi Tan to play with him when he is doing homework, but Chi Tan is naturally reluctant, so over time, their relationship has become a little alienated.Li Xu no longer knew where he had made new friends, and every time he had to walk shoulder to shoulder with that group of people and walk in the opposite direction of going home, not knowing where to go.So Chi Tan had to go home alone.

Until one time, Chi Tan's parents invited Li Xu's family to dinner again. After the meal, Chi Tan and Li Xu played in the room. It was nothing at first. They just watched TV together on a learning machine with Internet access. But one day after that day, after Chi Tan looked for the wallet where he kept his pocket money, he suddenly couldn't find it.At that time, he didn't even know when he lost it.So he went to ask his parents if they ever took his wallet.They said they didn't even know where his wallet was.Chi Tan was a little confused, but his mother was more anxious than him.Because during that time, due to various reasons that Chi Tan still couldn’t understand, the family’s economic situation was actually not good. Tan's mother was upset, so she knelt down and scolded Chi Tan as a punishment, which can be said to be the most ruthless one so far, so even the neighbors knew about it.Anyway, it was a very embarrassing experience in Chi Tan's life.But Chi Tan didn't doubt Li Xu at that time, until one day, he really saw his long-lost wallet in Li Xu's room.At that time, Li Xu went out for a while, and when he came back, he saw Chi Tan holding the wallet in astonishment.

It is not an exaggeration to say that the atmosphere was completely frozen for a while.Chi Tan just stared at Li Xu quietly, while Li Xu lowered his head uncomfortably, but there was not much apology and remorse on his face.

After a while, it was Li Xu who spoke first. He pushed against the door and said, "At that time, I had something to do and needed money urgently, so I thought I would borrow it from you and pay it back later. Don't let the third person know about it, okay?" Then he waited until Chi Tan agreed to him before Chi Tan, whose mood changed from helpless to angry and then speechless, left.

Chi Tan has always been a person who will do what he says, so he really didn't let the third person know, and in the beginning, he was actually willing to believe in Li Xu, and believed that Li Xu would pay back, but Li Xu didn't, until now Not yet.So this is no longer a question of money. This is an event that completely crushed Chi Tan's understanding of friendship and trust when he was a child, and it is also part of the seeds that planted a psychological shadow for his "autistic" road later.

Every time I saw Li Xu in Chi Tan Elementary School, I felt disgusted about this incident. Later, when I saw Li Xu less often in junior high school, I remembered it less frequently. Now, Chi Tan has actually not thought of it for a long time, but In this sleepless night, some things with Li Xu flashed before his eyes, and some things Li Xu taught him, about whether people should have expectations for another person.Chi Tan thought for a long time, and finally came up with the answer that, in fact, people have troubles because they have expectations for too many other people or things, because what you think is your business, but you have to know what is in your mind. The drama that is staged can do nothing but affect your own mood.So in fact, don’t think, don’t think about anything, that’s the only way to get rid of troubles.If you think about it, if you are greedy, then the troubles will follow you like a shadow, more effective than anything else.

Isn't that the case now, Chi Tan realized belatedly that he really didn't know when his need for Fu Quming had crossed the line.