Long river

Cen Li quickly asked for leave.

It is not a good sign to ask for leave just after becoming a full-time employee.But the director signed it readily. He put Cen Li as the focus of training, and Cen Li has always been very obedient. An obedient and hardworking child can always be easily preferred by others.

Cen Li bought a ticket for the next day, and he wanted to go home and tell his grandma.

The house was very empty, and the dry autumn made the dust floating in the air constantly suspended and swirling, and Cen Li suddenly felt that he was also a seed in the mayfly dust, and when he closed his eyes, he felt a kind of unsteady emptiness.

He nestled into the sofa, looked tiredly at the portrait of the old lady, and seemed to be talking to himself: "You must never have imagined who I saw today."

The room was quiet and no one answered him.

"She wants to apologize to us, I don't want to accept it, can I?"

"How ridiculous people are. She has a child and looks like a happy family. She can't even see a trace of worry on her face. What about me, what about my dad, and you, who will pay us for these years?"

Cen Li's voice became lower and lower, as hoarse as a crow's ugly roar, but he didn't shed a single tear.

After he grew up, he didn't like to shed tears very much. The old lady used to say that he couldn't see the tears when he was crying since he was a child.

But Cen Li has suffered a lot in the past ten years.

The next day, Cen Li boarded the car back to City A.

He has lived in City A for many years, and he is very familiar with the small old station, every narrow alley, wide road, and growing vegetation in the city. Even after he left, he always Keep coming back once a month.

He has to see his dad.

After leaving the station, Cen Li took a taxi and said to the master, "Go to the city prison."

As soon as the master heard that he was going to prison, he looked at him calmly from the rearview mirror.

In the long years, Cen Li had long been immune to this curious and probing gaze. He didn't speak, but tilted his head and quietly looked at the galloping scenery outside the window.

City A's urban planning hasn't changed much. Cen Li left here when he was 17 years old, and came back when he was 24. It still stands quietly, sometimes making Cen Li feel like he's dreamed of it.

He submitted an application to the prison yesterday, and was soon arranged to meet Cen Qingyang.

Cen Qingyang has been in prison for more than ten years. When Cen Li was 12 years old, he got in because of murder.

Cen Li has been bullied since he was a child. At the beginning, people always said that he had no mother.No adult would stop a child's malice, but Cen Li took it seriously.He kept those abuses in mind, and went back to ask Cen Qingyang: "Where is my mother?"

Cen Qingyang told him over and over again: "Xiao Li, my mother passed away, but she loved us very much. When you miss her, she is always looking at you."

Cen Qingyang is a gentle man. Cen Li never thought that he would go to prison for murder. Cen Li, 12, cried desperately and explained to the police that no, he was not a murderer.

No one listened to him.The whispers and sympathetic eyes of the adults around him made him feel scared and at a loss.His grandmother covered his eyes with tears and took him home, and he still remembers the warm touch of those hands.

His grandma said: "It's okay, Xiao Li, grandma is still here."

Cen Li was young, and only vaguely knew that his father had been wronged. When he grew up, the old lady told him the truth.

His dad killed someone, a rapist.The man was raping a teenage girl in the alley, and happened to be met by Cen Qingyang, who was off work, and the little girl cried to him for help.

So Cen Qingyang picked up the red bricks on the ground.

Cen Qingyang works in a newspaper office. He wears glasses and is tall and thin. No one can believe that he knocked him down with just that one blow.

That girl is He Zhihua.

The one who was crushed to death was the only son of a wealthy family in the local area. Relying on the power of the family, he dared to rape him on the side of the road. He didn't expect the retribution from God to come so quickly.

But that person's family didn't think so, they wanted Cen Qingyang to pay with his life.

He Zhihua's family members were forced to collect money and refused to testify in court, so Cen Qingyang was labeled as manslaughter and sentenced to 25 years in prison.

The old lady's eyes were red from crying, and she searched all her contacts and lawyers before she decided that manslaughter was an over-defense, but that was only to reduce her only son's sentence by three years.

In the years when the only news media was declining, it was a terrible thing for a murderer to appear in the family, but a small family with no power and power could only smash their teeth and swallow it in their stomachs.

So when Cen Li was bullied, he was no longer just a child without a mother.The adults didn't stop him anymore, so the child brazenly said in front of him, look, it's him, his father is a murderer.

Cen Li never wanted to think about the past, because he met Song Xingke, and he saw a completely different self in Song Xingke's eyes.Song Xingke will not be scared away by his indifference, Song Xingke will not pay attention to gossip, Song Xingke will praise him and love him, he holds Song Xingke tightly, takes Song Xingke as his life, but is Song Xingke?

A sound of unlocking woke Cen Li from his daze.He turned his head and saw Cen Qingyang walking in with handcuffs.

When Cen Qingyang saw him, the joy in his eyes almost overflowed, he smiled softly: "Xiao Li."

Cen Qingyang is a man of culture, even after so many years of prison life, his temperament has not changed. He is still thin and straight, with deep eye sockets, full of warmth.

Cen Li couldn't help thinking, who would believe that such a person is a murderer?But he just smiled and called him: "Dad."

Cen Qingyang sat down, touched Cen Li's hand, frowned, and said, "Why are your hands so cold?"

"It's windy outside," Cen Li said.

"What's wrong?" Cen Qingyang asked him, "Why did you come here before the end of the month?"

Cen Li looked at him and didn't know how to speak. He and Cen Qingyang had a very good relationship. Even during the gloomy days when Cen Qingyang was just in prison, Cen Li never held any grudges against him.

Strange isn't it?Cen Li also thought about it later, it was really strange.He just doesn't believe what everyone tells him, no matter how those people bully him, how they look at him, how they repeat to him over and over again, he just doesn't believe it.

In the beginning, every time Cen Qingyang saw him, he would shed tears and always say sorry, he felt ashamed of Cen Li from the bottom of his heart, but it was Cen Li who comforted him.

Teenagers keep repeating, "It's okay, Daddy, we'll all be waiting for you."

But no one knew, he started crying as soon as he went out.

There was a stone in the corner of the outer wall of the prison, and every time he saw his father, he would sit on it and cry, cry and cry, and cry until the sunset blushed and looked at him before wiping away his tears and going home.

He never went with the old lady, he was afraid that the old lady would see him cry.Later, Cen Li wondered if it was because he had shed all his tears at that time, so that when he grew up, he would have no more tears to shed.

Cen Qingyang saw his hesitation, he was very smart, and after thinking about it for a while, he said, "Is that girl looking for you?"

Cen Li nodded: "She said you refused to see him, so she insisted on me asking you."

"Oh." Cen Qingyang said with a smile, "Why do you have to see me? After all these years, what can I do?"

Cen Li said: "If you still hate her, I will..."

"Xiaoli." Cen Qingyang interrupted him, "I never hated her."

Cen Li opened his eyes slightly and frowned.

"How does she look like?" Cen Qingyang asked.

Cen Li said in a low voice: "It looks fine, I brought a baby, it should not be long after birth."

Cen Qingyang smiled and said, "That's good."

Cen Li wanted to refute him, but Cen Qingyang didn't give him a chance, he said: "Xiao Li, if I do it again, maybe I will still choose this way."

"What about me?" Cen Li questioned Cen Qingyang for the first time. He looked at Cen Qingyang incredulously: "Where is my grandma? What do you want us to do?"

Cen Qingyang was silent, he said: "If I leave that day, it will be a nightmare for the rest of my life."

"Although I'm in prison now, I have a clear heart. Xiaoli, if I'm alive, I only want a clear heart." He patted Cen Li's curled fingers, "The only thing I'm sorry for is you and Your grandma."

"Then why don't you want to see her?" Cen Li stared at him closely.

Cen Qingyang sighed: "At first I couldn't stand it either. I felt that kindness turned out to be a disaster. At that time, you were so young, and I was stuck in it for the rest of my life. What are you going to do?"

"I figured it out later." Cen Qingyang paused for a while, and didn't say what he wanted to understand.

"That little girl, she's had this thing in her heart all her life, and I'm afraid she won't forget it when she sees me. She's doing well now, after all, that's what I want to see when I save her. Maybe this sounds stupid, but Li, I do these things, and I am willing to bear the consequences, whether it is fair or unfair."

Cen Li had nothing to say, he asked: "What about me? Do you want me to take responsibility for your choice?"

"Little Li, do you still remember what I told you?" Cen Qingyang seemed to have tears in his eyes, and Cen Li felt that the light in the reception room might be too dazzling. He misread, "You have always been so outstanding , is the greatest pride of my life."

"I'm not good at all." Cen Li said softly, "I lost a lot of things, I lost my grandma, I lost the person I like, I like men, I have been with him since high school, Do you still think I'm good?"

Cen Qingyang was stunned, but only for a moment, he held Cen Li's hand: "Yes."

"You can choose who you want to be, you can choose not to forgive anyone, and you can like anyone who is worthy of your liking. No matter what you are, I will be here to watch you."

"Mom and grandma will also look at you, Cen Li, I want you to open your eyes to see the world, and you have to learn to look forward."

"Everyone loves you, and you don't lose a cent of the love others have."

Cen Li thought of the starry sky that Cen Qingyang had shown him since childhood.He stood under the stars, as if he could touch it with his hand, he asked Cen Qingyang: "Can I have it?" Cen Qingyang hugged him and said softly: "Xiao Li, it doesn't belong to anyone, but as long as you want, It's yours."

Cen Li felt his cheeks go cold, and only when Cen Qingyang touched his face lightly did he realize that he was crying.

He wiped away his tears indiscriminately, and whispered: "It's time, I should go."

Cen Qingyang said: "Next time she wants to look for you again, just let her come, and you come with her."

Cen Li nodded, looked at Cen Qingyang, got up and walked out, when he touched the doorknob, he heard Cen Qingyang call him softly: "Xiao Li."

Cen Li looked back at him.

The corners of Cen Qingyang's eyes, who are in his 40s, are already covered with fine wrinkles, and those lines make him look a bit vicissitudes and gentle.

He just sat there calmly, smiled and said to Cen Li: "Be a good person."

Cen Li couldn't bear it anymore, he covered his mouth, tears fell down in big drops.

He felt a shocking sadness and peace, as if his heart was blown by a rushing wind, and the wind shone brightly, illuminating his heart clearly.He looked at Cen Qingyang, nodded slightly, and then walked out without looking back.

The sun was shining outside, and the door slowly closed behind him. He looked up and saw Song Xingke standing under the tree.

When the man saw him, he hooked his mouth and strode over.

The sun spread out in large swaths behind him, and Song Xingke walked towards Cen Li step by step like this, into his heart, into his heart that was missing a corner.

Cen Li's breathing became lighter, as if he was afraid of disturbing the love at his fingertips.

It was his lost and regained first love, shining brightly, spanning a full six years, filling his soul majestically and recklessly.