nostalgic

When Patrolman Gao heard Tang Yun's questioning, he turned his head away as uncomfortably as he saw a trainer, trying to hide his flushed face from guilty conscience.

"Miss Tang, I'm sorry, the clues left by the case back then were too limited, and Jin Yan and I were forced to do so." Gao Lengrui took off his helmet and rubbed his hands nervously back and forth on the handlebars.

"Mr. Gao, I don't mean to blame, but I just feel a little surprised. Putting this matter aside, do you know that my father passed away?" Tang Yun didn't plan to pursue it any further.

"I saw the report on the news, and my colleagues also discussed it." Gao Lengrui breathed out deeply with relief.

"I received a letter at the funeral, in a dark blue envelope." Tang Yun paused.

When Gao Lengrui heard the words at the end of Tang Yun's words, a trace of panic flashed in his eyes.

"Now we are in the same situation. As compensation for deceiving me, let me join your investigation." Tang Yun said as if making a final summary.

"But..." Gao Lengrui hesitated.

"But I used to be very close to Jane Lai, so you have concerns, don't you? Could it be that a friend who has disappeared for nine years is more important than my father?" Tang Yun frowned and asked.

"Okay, I see, Miss Tang." Gao Lengrui nodded thoughtfully. "I'll call Shang Jinyan another day, you bring Qian Mo, let's get together, Yuheng, do you want to come?"

"I won't participate in the affairs of you young people." Wei Yuheng avoided Gao Lengrui's expectant eyes, and politely waved his hand in refusal.

In the tobacco shop at the foot of the overpass, Tang Yun carried a card with Gao Lingrui's phone number in her pocket, and picked out some colorful cigarette boxes like candy.

On the mottled bench opposite the Jian's house, Tang Yun habitually leaned there to smoke, and the smoke rings scattered with the breeze.

A car was coming not far away, the light was dazzling, Tang Yun flicked the soot and looked in the direction of the light, the door opened, and the person who got out was Rujing.

"Miss Tang likes to smoke this kind of low-grade tobacco?" He Rujing walked up to Tang Yun with high heels and laughed.

"Is it not possible? What's the matter?" Tang Yun immediately regained her vigilance from contemplation when she heard He Rujing's voice.

"A fool would take plant debris as a spiritual support." He Rujing put his hands in the pockets of his white suit and looked disgusted.

"Really? You see me so clearly? I want to ask, what is the spiritual sustenance of smart people like you? Sex*love*drugs*? Or killing people for money?" Tang Yun half-raised her arms and held a cigarette between her arms. , with an aggressive tone.

"Miss Tang is really fierce." He Rujing raised the corner of his mouth and sighed.

"My attitude towards you depends on your attitude towards me." Tang Yun held the cigarette between her fingers and brought it to her lips.

"Before I came to Lucheng, I was always curious about you. As your substitute, I existed in Jane Lai's life, and I always wondered in my heart, what kind of soul is the person I replaced? Miss Tang What about you, don't you have the slightest curiosity about me? Putting aside the idea of ​​a substitute, after all, I am the woman who is truly by Jane Lai's side." He Rujing was silent for a few seconds before speaking.

"Of course I will be curious, and I will have doubts in my heart. For example, Ms. He, who prefers white clothes, obviously looks a bit clean, but why is she engaged in such a dishonorable profession?" Tang Yun wiped out the small half of the cigarette between her fingers.

"There is no compelling reason, forced or to get rid of poverty, these are not. There is a kind of person who is naturally suitable to live in a dark and humid environment, like moss, only in the dark can he find a sense of existence, and the dark world can be exciting Senses. Your seemingly glamorous life is a boring repetition every day, like a candle on the bedside of a bedroom, which burns out without even experiencing a blizzard. Life can be seen from the beginning to the end. I don’t want to live like that .I want to live as I want. I experience all the things that people hate and hate. Every day I live in this world, I experience different things. Short and exciting are better than long and complicated. In a word, I am The masochists of fate find happiness in self-inflicted torture." He Rujing quietly stared at the Jian family's house in the dark night.

"What a novel outlook on life. Are Jane Lai and you on the same path? In terms of outlook on life." Tang Yun fumbled for a cigarette case from her pocket and lit one.

"It's completely different. You should know this better than me. After all, you were secretly in love." He Rujing raised his eyebrows and smiled.

When He Rujing's last words came to his ears, Tang Yun's right hand holding the cigarette trembled uncontrollably, and the cigarette with a little spark rolled down to his feet, bumping to the direction of the north wind in the windy autumn night .

"It wasn't really a secret at first, but I still feel ashamed when I think about it now." Tang Yun looked up at the acacia tree above her head and recalled faintly.

Like the restaurant on Wenxi Road that father and Uncle Jian used to go to when they were young, the bench under the acacia tree was the place where Tang Yun and Jane Lai met countless times when they were young.

After getting acquainted, Jane Lai would sit here angrily with her shoulders hugged every time she got acquainted with her. Her dark and bright eyes stared at Tang Yun's bedroom window for a long time to get angry. , wait until Jane Lai's anger is almost gone before going downstairs to appease her.

That was probably the time period when Jane Lai revealed the most of her heart. The appearance of silence was uncovered, and Jane Lai, who opened up the chatterbox, often showed extreme ups and downs of emotions inadvertently, and she had no sense of security at all.The man was sometimes anxious and worried about gains and losses, and sometimes calm and thoughtful, as if there were two people living in his body.

"What shame is there in love?" He Rujing turned his head and looked at Tang Yun in confusion.

"Strictly speaking, it's not love. If it has to be counted, it can only be called stolen love." Tang Yun felt a chill down her spine and stretched out her hand to tug at the front of her shirt.

After Jiang Nan married into Jian's family, Jian Lai was full of depression and was always on the verge of collapse. In order to appease Jian Lai, Tang Yun took the initiative to launch an alternative game. In the game, Jane Lai was still Jane Lai, and Tang Yun existed as Jiang Nan. At the beginning, the two were lovers, and at the end of the game, the two resumed their friendship status.

"Thinking about it seems very interesting." He Rujing sighed.

"It was really interesting at the beginning. It stabilized Jane Lai's emotions and at the same time satisfied my desire to perform. Later, as the number of games increased, we began to confuse with reality, and gradually couldn't tell the truth from the fake." Tang Yun squinted her eyes and recalled .

"How long did that period last?" He Rujing asked.

"It didn't last long. Jiangnan suddenly came home once and caught me playing her in front of Jane Lai. The situation at that time was as embarrassing as it was. After that happened, Jane Lai and I stopped the game at the same time. It took me a long time I just got out of the role of Jiangnan." Tang Yun frowned and said.

"Will you feel lost when the game ends?" He Rujing leaned on the back of the chair and asked Tang Yun.

"Yes, it seems to have been deprived of something." Tang Yun stared at the glass window of Jianlai's bedroom.

"Since this is the case, why stop it?" He Rujing asked in bewilderment.

"Jiangnan's crash made me realize that the relationship between Jane Lai and I was about to become uncontrollable. At the same time, I also realized that I was very greedy for the excitement brought about by this incident." Tang Yun was very frank.

Tang Yun's active approach finally got that person to open his heart, so Tang Yun saw the other side of Jian Lai deliberately hidden. Sometimes the sunshine is pleasing, and sometimes it is dark and empty, which is annoying.

What is more novel than this is the strange feeling when getting along with Jian Lai as Jiangnan. The restless heart is joyful because he is playing the impossible person, and because he is experiencing the emotions that are not tolerated by the world.

It was a thrill accompanied by shame and shame, everything was beyond reason, like showing the private parts of the body in front of the lover for the first time, like being intruded on by the unspeakable obsession.