I decided to give up on you

I'm sorry, Qiao Ke, when you read this letter, I have already left, I have passed away forever, I am tired, I am really tired, I used to always think that the love between two boys is not difficult, but When I fell in love, I really understood how difficult it is between two boys.

Gu Moshen is the only person I have ever loved in my life. From a young age to 30 years old, even when my stomach hurts so much that I can’t get up, I will still cook for him, tidy up his clothes, and be gentle with him. Forgive me I was ambiguous with you but didn't accept you, because I don't want to drag you into this world full of pain, I'm afraid you will become like me, afraid of people, afraid of talking and laughing from outsiders.

I am not as strong as you imagine, but in fact I am cowardly and fragile. I have thought about this day for a long time. Don’t cry. I like to see you smile. Even without me, you have to live a good life. Leave it to you, just consider me to be with you, don't bury me, I love cleanliness, I don't like the smell of soil, I like to see the world, so just scatter my ashes into the sea.

In this way, I can travel around the world. I always trouble you, and I will make you worry after death. If there is a next life, I will definitely marry you, but let me go in this life. At least it will not be painful. In my life There is a glass bottle in her bag, which is the wishing star slowly, give it to Gu Moshen, and tell him, don't wait, you can't wait.

Let him live well, don't come to another world to trouble me, although he has never heard my words, but this time I hope he listens to me, let him find a healthy person in the future, don't be like me, so Cowardly, I can't even guard a man, tell him not to let him down, after all, he is a person who will live his whole life, how can it be so easy to find.

And you, listen to me, find someone who likes you, you don't bother, just get married, you are old and not young, uncles and aunts are also anxious, what can I do, a sick and half-dead person, also I can't give you a son and a half daughter, listen to me, after a long time between men, you will get tired of it, you should find a girl, your orientation is not from this side.

I'm sorry, I'm already a dead person, but I still have to babble so much, but somehow I can't let you go, I'm afraid that you will be alone again in the future, what if I don't look for you, what if you want to I'm sick, I can't see what I should do, and I can't help nagging a few more words when I think of this.

We have known each other for 12 years, and you have loved me for 12 years. How wonderful it would be if I met you at the first time. I look like a teenager. I wish you could take a look. At that time, I was not like I am now. Younger, more cheerful, and much more tempered than now. At that time, I gave him my entire youth. How I wish you could accompany me through a period of youthful journey.

Well, in the next life, you must accompany me when I was young, spend my golden years, I am waiting for you, don't miss my youth and go away, Qiao Ke, don't be alone, I don't want to see, you hug The way my cold corpse is crying, I don't want you to never marry, promise me, it's okay, okay.

Finally, I want to say something, I'm sorry I broke my promise, I can't go back after sunset, forgive me, you must come earlier in your next life, otherwise I will find someone else again.