Kuai Chuan Zhi Won't Love You Again

An Li often hears a sentence from others, that sometimes there must be something in life, and there is no time in life, don't force it.At that time, I felt absurd. How do we know whether that person is your destiny or a passer-by in your life?

Merchant's blood runs through her body, but her soul has always wandered between humble and clumsy.She should be like An Lin, shrewd, cunning, not easy to give her heart, not easy to believe and move, this is a qualified businessman.She should have been like that, but she wasn't after all.

Just because she stole someone's young life.Not only her body, but her memories, her emotions, her life.

Nian En left in a hurry.At least for An Li, she left too quickly.If life and death cannot be changed, can you let her finish what she wants to say most?

But what should I say?

She opened the box and stared at the ring in the box in a daze.

Nianen, don't leave me.

Nian En, I am Jiang Li.

Nianen, I'm sorry.

Nianen, I love you.

She thought for a long time, as if walking into a narrow and deep alley.Countless possibilities, countless dialogues, it seems that there are so many things to say, but it seems so pale and powerless.

An inexplicable sense of shame floated in my heart.In fact, she most wanted to say to her, Nian En, let's get married.

Although I don't know what love is until now, but as long as I think that you belong to me, I feel that everything around me is no longer scary.Rumors are not that important, and An Li's life trajectory is not that important. The most precious thing in life is to stay with the one you love until you grow old.Get up together in the morning, squeeze toothpaste for each other and make breakfast, say goodbye to each other and go to work, open an umbrella for each other when it rains, prepare a coat for her when it is cold, go for a walk outside after dinner, or raise a lively and cute dog The puppy, the family often spends every ordinary night together.She will remember her birthday, their wedding anniversaries, and the big and small commemorative days, willing to understand and tolerate her, and believe her no matter what happens.Likewise, she knows she is deeply loved.Every day when she loves each other, it is also the moment when she is deeply loved.

Perhaps, this kind of love cannot be blessed by everyone, but she has learned to face her own feelings first.You have to face up to and examine your own heart, and then seize even the slightest chance to realize it, and love someone unsparingly with the attitude of moths to the fire and the determination to sink the boat.

Love is not as simple and sweet as imagined, and there must be mud and thorns in it.She always thought that she refused to read grace because of the hypocrisy of love itself, but she finally realized that, in fact, she has always known that love requires giving, and being loved is enjoyment, so time and time again, while refusing, she is greedy for what the other party gives. the warmth.

If we can find out earlier, we won't miss each other.From ten years ago until now, they have been separated by yin and yang, and they have no chance to express the feelings hidden in their hearts.She was too scared, afraid that the first time she mustered up the courage to love someone, she would fail, but she forgot how that person loved herself wholeheartedly.

Su Nianen is so innocent, and Jiang Li is so lucky.

The door opened without warning.An Li didn't look back, she just closed the bright ring box, and took a sharp puff of the cigarette she just lit.Very choking, but can make people sober.

"Do you know what day it is today?"

Zheng Feng was just standing at the door. He was wearing a black suit and black leather shoes. His sharp-edged face was no longer cynical, but indifferent.He didn't wait for An Li to reply, he had already spoken the answer again, "Su Nian'en is going to be cremated."

An Li lowered her head, not knowing what she was thinking.After a while, she seemed to realize that she nodded slowly, and only replied with one word, "Oh."

"Aren't you going to see her for the last time?" Zheng Feng asked again.

"...the last side?"

"Yes, the last side."

"Will she be unhappy if I go to see her?"

An Li grabbed the box and walked to the door, handed the box to the other party, and looked at him with dull eyes, "For a long time, she didn't talk to me, and I couldn't even see her in my dreams."

Zheng Feng glanced at the things in her hand, "You gave it to her."

"It's a pair." An Li lowered her voice, "She only gave me one before."

"An Li, you love her, right?" Zheng Feng asked her suddenly.

"Yes, I love her." Although such a confession, it was too late.

"Then what about Nianen?"

"... She probably just hates me."

"Since she hates you, how can she accept you and be friends with you?"

"That's because...I...you don't understand..." An Li sighed, not knowing where to start.

There was a touch of pity in Zheng Feng's eyes, "An Li, it's you who doesn't understand. She has never hated you, she loves you, and can even surpass everything."

"How could she love me?" An Li shook her head with a wry smile, "What she loves is the Jiang Li from ten years ago, the Jiang Li who didn't make her suffer misfortune."

"But what she loves more is An Li who is standing in front of her alive." Zheng Feng looked at her quietly, and said slowly, "No matter who you are, the person she loves has never changed."

"An Li, she knows who you are, she has always known."

"Su Nianen won't give up loving you just because you are An Li, she just can't love you anymore. Do you understand?"

An Li was taken aback, and the cigarette in her hand fell to the ground.

"You... love me?"

"I don't believe it...that's something a fool would do." Saying this, his hands became tighter and tighter.

"But she is a fool."

"Jiang Li, go and say goodbye to her."

Say what you want, do what you want, it's never too late, because she loves you and you love her.

"you……"

Zheng Feng's words were not finished.An Li pushed him away and ran out.The oncoming Shen Zhou was slammed away, Zheng Feng supported him and watched An Li hurried down the stairs.

"She hasn't put on her shoes yet." Shen Zhou stepped forward to snuff out the cigarette butt that fell on the ground, and said with a frown.

Zheng Feng laughed inexplicably, "Let's drive there and arrange for them to meet."

Shen Zhou stared at the cigarette butt, and suddenly remembered that a year ago, An Li pushed him away in the same way, so she met Su Nianen.But now, he was pushed away again because of their farewell.Maybe fate is really a very magical thing. He didn't believe it before, but now he understands a little bit why everyone believes in fate.Because there are some things that you really cannot pray for.

How does it feel to run alone on a crowded street?

An Li suddenly discovered that everyone she passed by had one or two companions by her side.They talked and laughed together and didn't look alone.But he was like a lunatic with his hair loose, running between them haggardly.

She ran barefoot on the somewhat rough road, and only then did she realize that the seemingly smooth road was not as safe as she imagined.The speed made her perfect, and the fast running made her feel the temperature of the wind, and the sweat on the palm of her hand soaked the soft down on the surface of the box.She knew that what she was about to face was a cold, speechless corpse, and her lover's body would complete the final sacrifice in this burning.

On that road, she thought a lot.Thinking of Su Nianen's every detail of getting along with him, thinking of her tender and lingering gaze towards him, thinking of her way of calling her "Xiao Li" in a low voice every time he hugs her.Yes, Su Nian'en knew it, how could she not know, even though it was ten years apart, those little habits of being Jiang Li's own have never changed.Maybe I am the most self-righteous one, how could Su Nianen not notice something that even Zheng Feng could notice?After all, she still loves her, that's why she accepts such absurd and ridiculous return from herself. Even if she feels wronged in her heart, she won't say it out, just to comfort herself.Su Nian'en is too stupid, she has always been so stupid, but everyone who meets her knows how precious such a stupidity is.

I don't know how long I ran until my brain was completely empty.I only know that there is the most important person in my life in the place I want to go to.She has no choice but to keep running, she has too much to say, she must say it to her personally.

There are quite a few people who have been cremated, and the faces of those who have lost their loved ones or relatives are abnormally gray and dejected.She saw Su Nianen in the separate morgue.This was the first time that he was so close to death and looked at Su Nianen so intimately.

There are only Su Nianen and An Li in the room.The make-up artist worked hard, Su Nianen looked very energetic, lying quietly on the bed, as if she was really just asleep.An Li bent down and stretched out her hand as before, with her fingers resting under her nose, but the other party was no longer angry.She thought she would be sad and cry, but she just felt sad and inexplicably relieved.Maybe what Zheng Feng said was right, she just wanted to keep her, but she never thought about what happened to Nian En in the past few years.If a person cannot make a choice about survival, at least he should have the right to decide his own death.She has already paid too much for love, and she shouldn't be unblessed even to leave.

It's just that there is still a little bit of reluctance.Such a beautiful Nianen, such a gentle Nianen, from now on, can only become a pile of white powder, lying alone in a box, unable to speak or move, becoming a substance without feeling and emotion in this world .When she misses her, she will never know again, whether she will cry for her heartbroken or whether one day she will find a new love, she will never know.Can she wait until the next life?

too slow.What if she forgets herself in the next life?

"Nianen, Nianen..." She lowered her head and touched the other person's forehead with her lips.From the forehead all the way down, kiss her lips and chin.The cold and unfamiliar breath announced the departure of a life.That person is her lover.Even if she had said that she would get better, it was just a flimsy lie.

"Su Nian'en, I'm Jiang Li." She said, her voice was harsh and harsh, and the empty room became more and more lonely.

"...Suddenly I don't know what to say to you." An Li took out the ring and knelt on the ground, the silver ring shone with a different kind of light under the dim light, "Nian En, let's get married."

She put the ring on the other party's finger, and put the other on her own finger, holding her hand, her face gently pressed against her body, "You will come back, right? If one day you really You are back, you must come back to find me. I will wait for you, just like you wait for me, always waiting for you. Nian En, no matter where you go, don’t forget me, stay with me, and don’t leave me.”

"Nianen, I love you too."

"Goodbye."

Destiny is originally a circle.If it wasn't for the ring Su Nianen gave her, their lives would not have undergone earth-shaking changes.Jiang Li was reborn in a fire, and Su Nianen left in another fire. The ring that guided the two finally changed from one ring to a pair.

It was Sunday, and it was evening when she emerged from the funeral home.She didn't want to let go of the box. Although the appearance of the box meant that someone had really left her, she still hugged it and walked alone by the secluded river.The wind was very strong by the river, the hair blocked the eyes, and tears flowed out at that moment.She squatted down holding the box, tears streaming down unscrupulously and falling on it.When the wind blows, a few tear stains are printed.

Nianen, from now on, I am alone again.

The author has something to say:

It's messed up again, it's messed up again...