Greedy.

Your world collapses silently into ashes, and all the previous beliefs, gratitude, and persistence suddenly become ridiculous.

But you don't even have time to clean up the ruins, let alone rebuild.You squatted there until you were numb, and your mind was filled with screaming and buzzing, until the phone suddenly turned on and the ringing rang throughout the room, and you suddenly realized that it was night.

You silently call and press the call.After a while, you send a message to him and tell him "it's okay, I'll go back".

You haven't figured out what role Qiao Qing played in this puppet show, but you know that the complete trust in the past will never be there again.On the one hand, you are still greedy for the last warmth of this safe haven, on the other hand, you are watching this safe haven crumbling in the wind and rain.

You take a deep breath.You have nowhere else to go after all.

And so you limped home, stepping on the debris.

It was the only house with lights on.

Qiao Qing is sitting in the living room waiting for you, and the animal world is playing on the TV.He didn't know if he was watching, but he looked over as soon as you opened the door.

You only paused for a moment, and then laughed very naturally: "The notes are too messy, it's delayed."

Smoother than you might expect.

Qiao lightly hummed: "Have you eaten?"

You really don't have an appetite, so you prevaricate: "It's too late to watch, so I laid a cushion on the road."

Qiao lightly got up and went to the kitchen.

You didn't hold back, and stopped, "I'm not hungry now."

Qiao gently turned on the range hood, and the low hum finally made this room feel like a home.

"I know." He didn't look back, "I haven't eaten yet."

You stood there for a while, then went back to your room without saying a word.

That night, you went to bed early on the pretext of being unwell. Unexpectedly, your excuse became true. In the early morning, you were swept away by a menacing high fever.

You slept drowsily for a few days, and those endless questions seemed to be burned by you with a high fever. After the burn was over, you could still go on with your eyes blindfolded.

After a few days, you recovered and were still alive and kicking, fighting with Qiao Qing, but you no longer wanted to go into the study.

Qiao Qing didn't seem to notice it until you accidentally noticed that he took the few books that had been put away before and took them back to the bookcase.You seem to have tacitly sealed up the study together, like a beautiful castle in a crystal ball, exquisite and unpopular.

Everything is the same as before, you will go out to climb mountains and wading in the clear weather, and curl up in the bed together on rainy days, watching the rain hit the plantains, the sound is slow.

You just suddenly stopped daring to respond when he smiled and said "the future is still long".A never-before-seen idea sprouts gently, continuously absorbing your vitality, almost covering up the sky in a short time.

Is it just the two of you in the future?

Is it just you two?

Your heart "thumped" slightly.Like a stone thrown into a lake, with a crisp sound, there are few splashes in the water.

Then it sank without a sound.

You spent the summer in a mediocre manner, consciously living in a dream, so you planned a trip when the maple leaves turned red, and took Qiao Qing to ride a bicycle to several provinces in the southeast.You love the way your mind sweats, almost obsessed with adrenaline.Along the way, I rushed to the hills and fields, and I did not refuse anyone who came on the sandy gravel road, and I was happy while bumping.

It wasn't until one time when you went down a steep slope that you dashed down without pulling the brakes, scaring Qiao Qing who was behind you enough, that it woke you up like a blow to the head.

What do you think I am doing?

Another kind of drunkenness?Then why are you still pulling Qiao Qing together?

You were picked up by the night wind, and the sweat on your back suddenly turned cold.The pulsating pulse cannot fool yourself, you ask yourself, just now, if you really overturned by accident, you will not regret it.

You once swore to Qiao Qing that you would not die in front of him, but now you have backtracked.

punishment?And who do you want to punish?

You grind the gravel on the ground, clenched your fist for a while, then loosen it again, and suddenly feel that the autumn night is as cold as water.

"It's windy." Qiao murmured softly.

You look back at him.

"...Let's go back."

It seems that you let him down once without anyone noticing, but this time, you suddenly let go of your grudge.

I don't know if it's because you have been traveling all the way up and down the mountain for the past few months. When you get home, you are shocked to find that Qiao Qing has become much haggard.You are not only surprised by the tiredness between his brows, but also by your own dullness.

You learn from the pain, come up with the determination to live a good life, and start searching the Internet for 120 kinds of ingredients for soup.You made up your mind to bring Qiao Qing back.

So when he cooks, you make soup, and you eat the soup without repeating it for nearly a month. Qiao Qing didn't gain much weight, but you became mellow first.

Qiao Qing said: "It's pretty good, I can't hug it."

Although you know that he can boast no matter what, you still can't help but roll your eyes approvingly.

Joe signed for it with a smile.

You finish the milk in one gulp.The warm milk pressed his stomach, successfully simmering out a soft drowsiness.You hugged his waist lazily: "No...you are raising me like a pig."

Qiao Qing said without sincerity: "Ah, I was discovered." Then he said: "Let go first, wash a cup."

You didn't let go, and walked forward with him barefoot, making up your mind to live yourself as a human pendant.You watched him wash the cup, thoughtfully: "How about I go for a morning run with you?"

Qiao gave a light hand and turned around uncertainly: "I'm fine...it's just that you don't need to lose weight—you're not very fat, you lost weight in the past few months."

"No," you peeled off a candy - you can always find it in any corner of the house, "just to stick to you."

After finishing speaking, you wrinkled your face suddenly, and pushed the sugar to your cheeks in disgust: "What a wicked strawberry smell, it's still sour."

Qiao Qing calmed down and said, "Wait a little longer, you should like its core."

You frown and wait.A hint of green grass smells out, you can't describe it, it's a bit astringent, but after a long time, it becomes sweet and hesitating, like a shy little girl - the kind with two braids.

"Delicious," you said, "what kind of taste?"

"I don't know, there are several designs."

"Come and taste." You said naturally.

Joe chuckled, clasped your shoulders, and bent down.

The kiss was a bit rough at first.You suddenly realize that you haven't kissed him for a long time, and you seem to subconsciously avoid these sweet and greasy kisses-like two small furry animals rubbing their heads against each other, and it's impossible to hold a grudge.But Qiao Qing didn't force it, and didn't even bring it up.You didn't even notice.

If you dodge without realizing it, he has indulged you for an unknown how long.

You grabbed his hem and led him deeper.There is no sleepiness left, the familiar electric current runs across the surface of your body, you curl up your fingers, and you only feel that your fingertips are numb.

The sugar has long since melted away.But no one cares about that.

You're not sure if you should chat with him about the past few months.You are too absent-minded, for example, you don't know that you are thin.Qiao Qing must have been worried.You dazedly try to plan, but every nerve tells you to focus on the present moment.

Joe bit your lip lightly.Gently, then the wet lips rubbed against each other, as if licking a wound.You don't know when he picked it up, but, well, focus on the present.

After God knows how long, you separated slightly.His thumb rubbed against your neck, and your disordered breaths were entangled together, suspiciously hot.

You asked maliciously, "What's the smell?"

Qiao lightly pressed his fingertips slightly: "Green tea, I adjusted it myself." He leaned closer, like a whisper: "It's too sweet, I almost didn't recognize it."

"Strawberries with green tea," you said, too shocked to ignore his flirting, "the devil's idea."

Once the enthusiasm faded away, you hesitated again whether to talk to Qiao Qing or not.He tried to bring it up a few times in the past few months, but you didn't cooperate.Now that your emotions have come back, the intimacy is still the same, everything is fine, Qiao Qing and you will never talk about the past, and it doesn't seem like a good time to bring up the old things again.Frying cold rice is the next best thing, you are only afraid that after the contradiction is exposed, the calm and calm you have tried to maintain will no longer be there.

After all, the foundation of a calm sea is to close your eyes and stop your listening.

Unexpectedly, before you make a decision, the paper peace will fall apart by itself.

One day, Qiao Qing was chopping vegetables in the kitchen and casually asked you to bring him some ingredients.You opened the refrigerator, just glanced at it, and then you were stunned.

There are two bottles of fruits and vegetables standing in the refrigerator, and there are various bitter gourds, lilies, etc. placed underneath. Two potatoes and a few eggplants are placed next to each other. They are not rich, but they are neatly placed.

You stand there for a while, staring straight at the refrigerator, not sure what you want to do, so you open the frozen door too.

Sure enough, there were several bags of quick-frozen dumplings inside. You looked down and found that there were corn and shrimp.

You suddenly retch.It's a different model of refrigerator, but the contents—and the order and placement—are exactly the same as the refrigerator in your old house.

Same damn thing again.

The cold air hits your face, and your red eyes seem to be frozen by it, and you can't shed tears.You haven't been able to get anything good from fate in the past, so why should you expect to be able to do it now?

If the nightmare is determined to return, then avoiding it won't stop it, fighting won't stop it, and certainly not love.You know now.

You think you know a little better this time.You used to think that it was only Qiao Qing's fault that there were too many overlaps. You just forgive him and just ignore him.But you now find that no one is innocent.

Because you put in those two bottles of fruits and vegetables.

You gag even more, almost bending over.Qiao Qing heard the noise and came out of the kitchen in a hurry. You pushed him away and rushed into the bathroom against his surprised eyes.

And then like you've expected a thousand times - you throw up.