That narcissus flower is perfect

Philosopher Yu Tian recently realized a truth: Every wise and stalwart big man eventually falls under his wife's pomegranate skirt or suit pants.

For example, him.

As a vase man with no literary talent, the only thing he is useful for is his face. As for the brain, that is absolutely missing. Writing a [-]-word self-criticism is more terrifying than dying.

Yu Tian racked his brains, and after poking out two lines of words on the A4 paper, he finally realized the reality sadly - since he can rely on his appearance for a living, why bother to use his brains.

He decided that things that can be solved in bed must never be solved under the bed.

The last time he accompanied Yu Yue to watch a small movie, he remembered that Yu Yue was very interested in one of the uniforms. Today happened to be Friday, and he didn't have to go to work tomorrow, so maybe he could meet his request at night.

Yu Tian was secretly happy, put Yu Xiaoyu in the small cart, and went out with the child.

There is an adult goods store on the second ring road. The store is quite big, and the decoration has an indescribable dusty smell. Yu Tian noticed it when he was shopping last time. Went in for a visit.

Yu Tian pushed Yu Xiaoyu, hummed a song and said, "Your dad is so prudish and old-fashioned."

Yu Xiaoyu lay lazily in the trolley, with his legs raised up on the guardrail of the car, swaying left and right with the shaking of the car, looking like an old man.Hearing this, he rolled his eyes indifferently, closed his eyes and continued to meditate.

Yu Tian pinched the soft flesh on his cheek, and rudely stuffed the bottle into his hand: "Drink it yourself, your dad will accompany me on business at night, and I don't have time to take care of you."

Yu Xiaoyu opened his mouth, found the place where the pacifier was, and took a sip every now and then, which was a temporary reconciliation with Yu Tian.

The days in winter are always short, it’s only after four o’clock, and it’s already dark outside, and the face of the person coming 30 meters ahead can’t be seen clearly. Thanks to the street lights, it adds some vitality to the whole city.

The darker the weather, the more customers patronize the sex shop.The people who came in and out either bowed their heads and shrunk their necks, or wore masks and hats. It was rare for people like Yu Tian to walk in boldly and push a baby carriage without any shame.

The people in the store secretly glanced at the baby in the car, with speechless expressions on their faces.

Yu Tian didn't notice anything unusual around him, so he threw Yu Xiaoyu into a corner and picked it up wholeheartedly.In addition to the unique uniforms, there are many novel props in the store. The colorful props are beautifully packaged and neatly placed on the shelves, which dazzles him.

Yu Tian discovered the New World, so it doesn’t matter if he doesn’t know the words on the packaging, he took a photo and searched, and the Chinese explanation text immediately popped up on the Internet.While comparing the pictures, he murmured something, and every time he saw something novel, he bought it and put it in his arms, and soon he was full of it, because the arms were not enough.

Yu Tian looked left and right, carried Yu Xiaoyu out of the car, and threw the sex toys into it. Guessing that Yu Yue was about to leave work, he quickly grabbed two sets of brightly colored clothes, and hurried home with the child in his arms.

Yu Xiaoyu: "..."

On the way, Yu Tian received a call from Yu Yue, asking where he was.

"Go shopping with your son." Yu Tian's face was full of spring, his heart was surging, his excitement couldn't be concealed at all, and his voice trembled slightly, "I'll give you a big surprise right away, I'll wait."

There happened to be a shopping mall not far away, Yu Tian hung up the phone, and immediately pushed the baby carriage to find the bathroom.

Yu Yue didn't say a word, only beeps could be heard on the receiver, he shrugged helplessly, turned his head and smiled at the people in the room: "Wait, my son will be back soon, let you see What do you call good bamboo shoots?"

There were three people sitting on the sofa in the living room. Zhou Xian was considerately next to the administrator. The administrator's belly was not obvious, but his face was pale, and he was indeed pregnant.As soon as Zhou Xian leaned against him, he hid to the side, Zhou Xian leaned against him again, he raised his eyebrows, and immediately stared him back.

The last time I was scared to death by the administrator in the flower shop, Yu Yue still hadn't calmed down, seeing Zhou Xian's doormat-like appearance, he laughed and said, "Oh, pregnant women just have a bad temper, look at my little brother Zhou."

The third person is Yu Yue's little boy, Ma Gan'er, who chased after Yu Yue all those years ago, but Yu Yue refused to eat the grass beside the nest, Ma Gan'er was heartbroken, and went abroad to let the blond gay guy harm him.After finally returning to the country, he was called over by Yu Yue before his butt was hot. He pretended to see his precious son, but in fact he wanted to show off that he was no longer single.

Ma Gan'er's eyeballs rolled around on the administrator, and she looked at Yu Yue speechlessly: "What a joke, ha ha."

Yu Yue realized that he had made a slip of the tongue and quickly shut his mouth tightly.

Ma Gan'er crossed Erlang's legs and swayed his body, turning his sharp eyes around Yu Yue: "Be honest, where did you cheat your son?"

"How can it be called cheating? They gave birth to me willingly." Yu Yue was not without pride, "I also gave away a baby daddy for free, that long one, tsk tsk, I guarantee you, even if you travel all over the United States, you can't find a better one." He is good-looking, you will know later."

Ma Gan'er flicked his bangs sourly: "Can you be more handsome than me?"

Yu Yue stared at the shiny little half of his head with a horrible expression on his face: "My dear brother, you are going to be bald in front, take it easy."

Ma Gan'er didn't think he was disobedient at all, he shook his head deftly, and the hair from the back was thrown to the front immediately, barely covering his hairless forehead.

Yu Yue: "..."

Calling a few good friends over at night is actually a full moon wine for Yu Xiaoyu. The restaurant Yu Yue has already booked it, and it is just across the road.

Yu Yue glanced at the time, secretly anxious, this person can really dawdle, what time is it, and he hasn't arrived home yet.When he was about to call again to urge him, he finally heard a "ding" from the elevator entrance.

"Here we come," Yu Yue opened the door excitedly, not forgetting to turn his head to show off at the hemp pole, "You wait, I promise to make you look foolish."

The sound of the wheels sliding down the corridor was very clear. Yu Yue stood on tiptoe and stretched his head to look out. Suddenly he staggered, fell on his back, and murmured: "God...God..."

"What's going on?" Ma Gan'er jumped up, and saw a man in a see-through suit pushing a stroller walking towards him.

The man walked up to Yu Yue, stretched out his long arms, picked him up from the ground, hugged him directly into his arms, raised his brows flirtatiously: "God~why~ you're so intimate, I'm so handsome?"

Yu Yue: "..."

and! No! Have!