tampered with the past

I met my second self in the Department of Mysteries of the Ministry of Magic. The moment Hermione fell to the ground, I clearly felt a monster awakening in my body.

"kill!"

Monsters roared in my head.

No!

I don't want to be the second Voldemort.

Ultimately, Sirius' death took all my sanity away.

"kill!"

"kill!!"

"kill!!!"

I wanted to do something brutal, something bloody, something scary.But Voldemort got in my way—

"Avada Kedavra!"

I have no fear, and I don't want to resist, but the god of death is unwilling to take me away. He is more willing to let me be covered in bruises in the world.

Dumbledore saved me.

At least Dumbledore saved my body.

And my soul...

My soul has been polluted, doomed to fall into the dark hell.

i love hermione.

He didn't want her to suffer any harm.

But my soul couldn't help but want to destroy her, to break her calm mask, to make her cry, to make her angry, to make her hate entangle her heart, to make her feel so much pain.

Hermione kissed Krum.

The desire for revenge keeps me restless at all times.

I want to make her sad.

I want to make her sad.

I want to make her suffer.

A growing demon has taken over my body.

I kissed Ginny.

Hermione didn't cry.

Her benevolent smile turned off the monster inside me, and I finally regained control of my body again, but couldn't explain anything.

I can't be with Hermione.

Because of Voldemort.

Because of the monster inside me.

Because I love Hermione.

I am a person without a future, and what awaits me on the road ahead is only darkness and death.

Hermione is different. Her future should be happy and free, with a loving husband and filial children.

Her future should not be stained with darkness because of me, and should not be displaced because of me.

Ron loved her.

And, I have reason to believe that Ron would be the perfect husband for Hermione, just as Mr. Weasley is the perfect husband for Mrs. Weasley.

All I need to do is make a big show of intimacy with Ginny, make Hermione completely give up on me, and let her see Ron's goodness.

I seem to be forever miscalculating.

Hermione and Ron, neither of them would let me face danger alone.

"We've got time to think about it if we want to back off. We've had time to think about it, haven't we?" Hermione said to me.

"No matter what happens, we're here for you," Ron said to me.

The monster ran away from my body.

Because of friendship.

Because of the truth.

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