summer monsoon

When Ji Xing returned to find a parking space and touched the park in the middle of the street, it was almost two o'clock.There were almost no people on the street, only Lin Fengliang, who was dressed like a snowman, was sitting in the biting cold wind. On the long night of New Year's Eve, he quietly blended into the night like a park decoration that no one cared about.

Ji Xing turned his nose sour and rushed over

"Are you stupid, kid! You don't go home in the middle of the night."

Lin Fengliang raised his head and forced a smile and said, "Happy New Year, Brother Xingxing."

After speaking, something in the eye sockets lit up, and the eyes full of grievances flickered under the street lamp.

His heart seemed to be tightly grasped, Ji Xing clenched his fists tightly, his nails were almost embedded in the flesh of his palm.He restrained the urge to hug the person in front of him and said as calmly as possible: "Long time no see."

Lin Fengliang saw these eyes for a long time. This person gave him great hope, but also brought him disappointment and frustration.His always calm heart began to fluctuate since he met Ji Xinghui. He had never been so embarrassed. Ji Xinghui seemed to cast a curse on him, and the calmness he had cultivated for more than 20 years was disintegrated bit by bit.Those emotions of tension, frustration, and anticipation that were once easily shut out of his heart are constantly circulating in his heart with the close-up of Ji Xinghui's face. He never knew that getting close to people is such a joyful and sad entanglement.

Ji Xing looked back at him silently, and stretched out his hand to pull him. "send you home."

"I don't want to go back." Lin Fengliang said with white mist coming out of his mouth, "I don't want to spend the New Year alone all the time."

Life is tiresome, it plays tricks on you and tortures you, but it will still send you alone afterwards, making your heart soften time and time again uncontrollably.How could he bear to leave him alone.

"Then go to my house. It's too cold, let's go." Ji Xinghui pulled him into the car.

The long street was silent, and after the grand prayers and blessings, everything returned to calm.They shared the small space in the car and were silent all the way.Ji Xinghui glanced at the co-pilot in the rearview mirror. He sat in the seat tiredly and kept his eyes fixed. The light outside the window made his eyes flicker.

The heating in the room was sufficient, and the temperature difference of more than [-] degrees made people relax instantly. Lin Fengliang shook off the white down jacket vigorously, as if trying to get rid of the inexplicable depression and loss of the whole night.He turned his head and saw Ji Xinghui closed the door behind him, blocking the lonely and cold night outside.Without thinking about it, he turned and leaned over, like a long-distance traveler leaning toward a bonfire in the snow.

Ji Xing closed the door, unzipped his coat, and reached out to the wall next to him to find the ceiling light switch.

Lin Fengliang suddenly rushed forward, and he could feel the cold air penetrating his whole body through his clothes.The children are freezing.

Ji Xing hugged him naturally, and patted his back through his clothes: "It's freezing, go take a hot bath."

The person in his arms didn't move, Lin Fengliang pressed his forehead against his collarbone, buried his face in his clothes, and said in a muffled voice, "It's a good thing you're here. I'm sorry I shouldn't lose my temper."

Seeing his appearance, Ji Xinghui was annoyed and scared, what if he didn't turn on the phone, what if he fell asleep. . .Will Lin Fengliang wait forever, or will he be silently sad and delete his contact information completely, pretending that he has never known him and living like before?

They stood close together in the dark for a while, Ji Xinghui reached out and pressed the light switch, and took a closer look at his face through the light. His expression had calmed down, his eye circles were red, and there were no tears.

"Have you ever cried? Want to cry?" Ji Xing asked back.

"No. I don't think about it now."

"Then why did you cry last time?" Ji Xinghui raised his hand to touch his red ears. He had already started to feel hot, and he might have a slight frostbite.

"I don't remember the last time I cried." Lin Fengliang thought for a long time before answering.

Ji Xinghui really wanted to slap himself.I know him clearly. . .

"Feng Liang, do you know about social barriers? Yes, it's a psychological problem. Don't be afraid if it's not a serious illness. Everyone has some psychological problems to some extent. You are no different from others." From time to time, he would find that Lin Fengliang's wrong self-cognition, and inexplicable inferiority complex.

"I know. The club has a psychiatrist for the annual physical examination. When did you notice it?" Feeling that the hand on the ear was about to leave, Lin Fengliang tilted his head unconsciously, and subconsciously searched for the hand with his ear, like Puppy begging to be petted.

"I can feel it after being in contact with you a lot. Since you know it well, is there any treatment?" Ji Xinghui put his hand back helplessly, and gently rubbed his ear bones and earlobes from top to bottom to help blood circulation.

"I tried it. It didn't help at first, but it got better when I grew up. When it was the worst, I didn't talk to others in public for a few months. But because of the competition, the team doesn't recommend taking medicine for a long time. After all, this kind of problem is usually nothing special. Serious consequences." Lin Fengliang added: "It doesn't matter, I'm used to it."

Ji Xing looked back into his eyes and said seriously: "Don't get used to it, it's wrong. From now on, you can lose your temper when you're unhappy, and cry when you're sad. Don't escape these feelings, okay?"

"it is good."

Lin Fengliang suddenly became happy, pushed away the hand next to the ear, took off the thing hanging around his neck, and hung it on Ji Xinghui's chest. "Here. That's what I wanted to give you today."

"What is this? A New Year's gift?" Ji Xinghui held up the card, which was a work permit with his English materials and photos printed on it.

"New Year... gift?" Lin Fengliang was a little embarrassed: "Will I give a gift for the New Year, I, I don't know... I'm not ready."

"This is it. Fengliang, there is no prescribed form and shape for gifts, as long as they can make the other party happy, they are good gifts. Are you trying to invite me to watch the World Championships?"

"Well. Do you want to go? I think, I probably can win. The former two defending champions have retired, so as long as I don't make mistakes, I should be fine... But I don't know if there will be other dark horses... Say no allow."

"Well. You can win. I want to see you win." Ji Xing pushed him back to the bathroom:

"So the world champion, take a shower first. Otherwise, I will become a sinner in history if I make the champion sick."

"Not yet." Lin Fengliang smiled embarrassedly.

"It will be there soon." Ji Xinghui helped him get a change of clothes and put them in: "Let's wash it."

After closing the bathroom door, Ji Xing sat back on the floor beside the bed, took off the certificate around his neck and held it in his hand, remembering that he was sullen at the fact that only Gu Rourou was invited.Unexpectedly, he just wanted to invite him personally, and it was not the audience seat, but the infield closer to him.Is it because I am his friend?Or. . .

The sound of water stopped abruptly, the bathroom door suddenly opened, and the dense water vapor lingered and spread to the bedroom.

"Brother, I want to drink water."

Lin Fengliang half-opened the door, wearing only a dark gray bath towel around his waist and stepping barefoot on the black non-slip blanket, which made his already fair skin more transparent, his steaming cheeks, shoulders and elbows were pink, and alder fruit dew His skin was covered with water droplets that were sliding down, his wet hair was hanging down, and the ends of his hair were dripping with water. The tiredness in his eyes was probably the drowsiness of a sudden relaxation.

Ji Xing's head buzzed and shook for a while, then he pretended to be calm and went to the kitchen to pour a glass of water and bring it back to the bathroom door.Lin Fengliang took the glass and rolled his Adam's apple to drink it down. The fragmented rainbow color blocks at the bottom of the glass came into view. Ji Xinghui suddenly realized that he had given him his usual glass in a panic.

Ji Xing took the empty cup back, and touched the brim of the cup with his fingers without any trace, and there was still a certain damp feeling.He bit his lower lip and said heartily, kid, don't test me anymore.

"Well, you... don't catch a cold. Didn't I give you clothes, why don't you put them on."

"Too thirsty. Didn't drink water all night." Lin Fengliang's voice came from the closed door again.

When did you become so coquettish. . .Ji Xinghui was a little embarrassed.

"Let me ask you something." Ji Xinghui hesitated again and again: "Have you had a girlfriend before?"

"What do you think?" Lin Fengliang said helplessly, "Boys are afraid of me, and girls are even less afraid to approach me."

"What I'm asking is not this. It's not the kind of friends who make friends, but the kind of friends who fall in love. They will date alone. I don't see the kind where he would scratch his heart and miss her. He doesn't want other boys to approach her. I hope she can just The kind that belongs to you alone, like the kind that your father likes your mother." Ji Xinghui also went all out, otherwise he might really not understand.

"No." Lin Fengliang had never made friends or girlfriends.

He was wearing Ji Xinghui's short pajamas, holding his top in his hands.The thin body has slender and well-proportioned skeletal muscles, and the outline of the abdominal muscles is very shallow in the relaxed state. It can be imagined that it must have a flexible feel when pressed.

Tsk, come again.

"Put your clothes on properly!" Ji Xinghui sighed a little brokenly: "Do you usually train like this? Do you often not dress properly in front of others?"

"You are not someone else." Lin Fengliang said so, but obediently put on the soft cotton top.

Hiss, Ji Xinghui really gave up.God threw him such a big trouble, but he couldn't let it go.

Only the feelings of young people don't care about the consequences, and they can rush forward without thinking about their own safety in the moment of temptation.But he is no longer young, and his impulsiveness may hurt both of them.That's all for him, but he doesn't want to embarrass Lin Fengliang, and he doesn't want him to be disgusted and disgusted when he thinks of himself in the future.

Ji Xinghui kept reminding himself that Lin Fengliang had never made friends, nor liked anyone.It's normal for him to have trouble grasping the boundaries of intimacy, and by the standards of a straight man, he doesn't seem to do anything that crosses the line.It's because I'm not pure and honest enough, that's why I unconsciously make many ordinary behaviors more charming and ambiguous.He absolutely must not give any abnormal guidance to Lin Fengliang who is like a blank sheet of paper.

Although I made up my mind, my heart was still a little sour.Ji Xinghui, Ji Xinghui, when did you become so shameless and ignorant, you deserve it.

Lin Fengliang got into bed, wrapped in the relaxing sweetness of bergamot, he lost consciousness completely before he even had time to say good night.

Ji Xing lay beside him and traced his peaceful sleeping face with his eyes. I haven't seen him for almost two months, and his hair has grown a little.Year-round exercise has made his breathing slower and longer than ordinary people, and his heart beats so strongly that it slightly vibrates the mattress.

I just like it, nothing to be afraid of.Liking is just a matter of one person, no response or result is required.What I want is these moments of self-deception and warmth, to see the happiness in his eyes.

He moved his mouth silently: "Happy New Year, kid."

After saying what he hadn't said all night, he turned around and fell asleep with his back to Lin Fengliang.

The author says:

Take the milk dog home~