taste time

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It was late at night and sleepless in the middle of the night. Through the window, I could see the flashing neon lights in the distance, various advertising lights, and the continuous flow of cars on the Lijiao Bridge.It was that blank feeling again, unable to recover, seemed to be thinking about something, and seemed to be thinking about nothing.

"Girl, aren't you sleepy?" She said, very kind and kind, with a low voice.

"Hmm. Grandma isn't sleeping yet?" I thought of my grandma, who had passed away for several years and loved me very much when she was there.

"Hey, I'm getting old. I don't sleep so much anymore."

"Grandma has a long life this year?" Anyway, I have no sleep, so I might as well talk to her.Grandma used to look forward to me going home to talk with her, but I was always impatient with her and thought she was long-winded.

"83. I'm old, my body is useless, and I often get sick. It seems that I won't live long." She seems to be talking to me, and it seems to be talking to herself.

"How could it be? Seeing that grandma looks good and her body is strong, she will definitely live to be more than 100 years old."

She smiled kindly: "The little girl can really talk. Hey, how old is the girl this year?"

I also smiled and said, "I am almost eighteen."

", I'm still young. I have plenty of time to walk around and have a look. I'm old, and I can't go anywhere."

yes.I am still young.But do I really want to be able to do anything? I often feel very tired and tired.It seems that there is no future in sight, no hope in sight.What do I want? Grades? But what are the grades used for? To seek a better future? But, what is a good future? If I don’t like it, is it still a good future? Or, Shiya? How can I want her, I can only love her silently? She and I are destined to be only friends. In the future, I will watch her get married and have children, and I will also watch her full of children and grandchildren.Just thinking about it makes my heart ache. Can I really do it? But, what if I can’t?

It seems that there is really no one who will accompany me to grow old.The setting sun is setting in the west, the autumn wind is rustling, and I am alone to enjoy the haze. How can I bear this situation?

Besides Shiya who often came to see me, Brother Yuan and the others also came once.Still with a fruit basket, no flowers.I asked Shiya why you didn't send me flowers, she said speechlessly that when I hang up here, someone will send flowers.Seeing her promiscuous smile, she is really getting more and more twitchy. If it wasn't for the infusion, I would definitely beat her up.

Come and go, they are familiar with Brother Yuan, sometimes they ask me to go with them when they go to do something.I didn't think too much about it at first, but some people in the class thought that I was messing around with some dubious people, and secretly sneered at me.Those with good grades are prejudiced against such students, thinking that they are ignorant.I used to hate them too, but now I feel that they are far better than those sanctimonious and prudish people.

After staying for almost five days, I was finally discharged from the hospital. I said goodbye to the grandmother next to me. She said that I left and no one talked to her anymore.When people are old, they are most afraid of being alone.

My legs were still very weak, and I felt weak.Shiya looked me up and down for a while, before coming to the conclusion "You seem to have lost a lot of weight." It's not because of poor food and lack of appetite.I just feel like I'm going to collapse.

☆, untitled

I was still bored in the hospital, but when I came back, I found that there were so many things to do.In five days, a lot of homework was naturally dropped, and there were naturally a lot of homework.Seeing that they are all making exercise books, I have no idea where to start.The deskmate is still Xu Ke, but the other deskmate has changed.Xu Ke brought his notebook, and I read the book and his notebook in the self-study class and pondered slowly.However, his handwriting was very scribbled, like ghostly drawn symbols. After reading it for a long time, I didn't understand what he wrote.Look annoyed.

Since the last cheating incident, many teachers have disdained me.Besides, I have failed the exams these few times, so I will naturally be relegated to the parallel class next semester, so no one cares about me.I couldn't understand it, so I asked Xu Ke, he understood and he explained it to me generously, but most of the questions I asked, he could only give a rough idea.

Originally, I had enough things to do, because the next New Year's Day, the student union will arrange for me to solicit sponsorship.I sighed in my heart, my eloquence makes me blush when I speak, can I get it? I told Shiya, and she said she could ask Sister Shan for help.Yes.Last time Shi Ya said that she was a boss, so she was relieved for a while.And I finally knew what kind of boss she was.Originally named Huo Yishan, 21 years old, is one of the shareholders of the nightclub.

Uh. . . . . .

I have to sigh, Huang Shiya, your network is really wide! With the relationship between Brother Yuan and Shiya and her, she will naturally agree, but the point is, I can't find her.However, when Brother Yuan spoke, she still helped me very seriously. I didn't know who to call, and I got something worth more than 900 yuan.It attracted everyone in the student union to look at me with admiration, saying that I usually don't talk much, but in fact I hide it too deep, I am the real capable person, and said that I will give it to me for sponsorship in the future.I smiled and said it later.

They helped me a lot, and of course I have to thank them.After agreeing to invite them to dinner, I took out all my money and asked them to order whatever they wanted.How could they really kill me so cruelly, they just said that it would be fine to go to the cafeteria for a meal.Canteen, no matter what you eat, it doesn't cost much.

It's getting colder and colder.When I woke up in the morning, there was a layer of white water vapor on the glass windows.The location is by the window.Suddenly, I had a whim and scribbled on it with my fingers.

Huang Shiya. Huang Shiya. Huang Shiya. . . . . .

After writing for a long time, I realized that it was all written with Huang Shiya's name.Big and small, all kinds.

After class for a while, the sun shines in warmly through the window sill.Looking back, the water vapor had long since disappeared, and Huang Shiya's name had long since disappeared as well.For a while, my mood was complicated.

Just like this day after day, when I am with Shiya, I can always forget a lot of troubles and laugh heartlessly.When I was alone, I started to feel sad again, and I couldn't find something that could make me laugh.Because it was New Year's Day, the class said that they decided to go to a dinner party, watching the students chatting and talking, full of energy.I was still not interested, and I didn't want to eat anything, I just stood there silently in a daze.Later they played games again, some truth or dare, the class teacher was not there, they played a little crazy, but I just wanted to leave quickly.

Seeing that they were going to play for a while, I told the monitor that I was not feeling well and left.That's their excitement, nothing to do with me.If you don’t want to laugh, you don’t want to laugh, if you don’t want to play, you don’t want to play, I don’t need to force myself.

In a blink of an eye, it's the end of the term.Because I didn't study hard during this period of time, there is no doubt that I did poorly in the exam.During the last self-study class of this semester, Xu Ke suddenly said, "Hey, Qingshan, this should be the last class of our tablemate."

I will definitely be in the parallel class next semester, and so is he.Before I knew it, I was at the same table with him for most of the semester.Not wanting to make the atmosphere so heavy, he said: "That's not necessarily true, just in case we will still be in the same class next semester." I will go back to Class Nine, and I will return to whichever class I come from. go.There is a feeling of going back to where you came from.He himself was in the experimental class at the beginning, so I don't know which parallel class he will be reduced to.

He chuckled, "That's right. If I'm in the same class as you, we'll still be at the same table, okay?" It's just talking, what is the probability that there are [-] classes in science.Yes.Regardless of whether I hate this class or not, I am leaving soon. From now on, anything in this class will have nothing to do with me.

☆, winter vacation

This is my first time going home this semester, and I am extremely reluctant, but there is nothing I can do.Mom saw that I was wearing thin clothes, so she told me to wear more clothes, so as not to catch a cold.Dad is still very cold to me. He said he was cold but he was not. It can almost be described as hatred.When he sees me, he always has a sullen face, and he also growls when he talks to me.Seeing me sitting idle, he immediately yelled at me for not reading a book.I woke up late, and he would yell at me to get up, for fear that others would not know that I was still sleeping.Every time I saw him, I could only hurriedly find an excuse to leave and escape from his sight.I don't know how our father and daughter get along in this way. Is this really a family relationship? Before my father talked loudly to me, I would secretly hide under the quilt and wipe my tears. Now, I don't know if it is because he often Training, I got used to it, and I will never cry again. Looking at them, I just feel ironic, and feel that I am far away from them.I really can't live up to their demands.I used to be afraid of having a younger brother, but now I long for a younger brother.In this way, although they will ignore me, at least they can not control me all the time.