Three Kingdoms: Start by buying a governor.
Chapter 28 Liu Bang: Do you like it? Liu Hong: It's so delicious!
In fact, Liu Hong knew perfectly well that the reason why the Yellow Turban Army was able to grow so powerful was because these aristocratic officials were only going through the motions.
When Bingzhou was invaded by the Xiongnu, they claimed they had no money; when the Yellow Turban Rebellion broke out in Jizhou, they made excuses; now that the fire is almost upon them, they are still tripping each other up.
He deliberately provoked the messenger and berated the senior officials in order to force them to express their opinions. Sure enough, Minister Yuan Kui tremblingly expressed his willingness to donate half a year's salary to help with the military expenses, and several officials from aristocratic families also gritted their teeth and promised to send more private soldiers.
But Liu Hong knew that this was far from enough.
He stared at the gloomy sky outside the hall, recalling the secret report that powerful local figures were secretly trading with the Yellow Turban Army, and suddenly felt a chill run down his spine:
The dragon throne was teetering on the brink of collapse, and among the kneeling people below, countless had prepared congratulatory petitions to Zhang Jiao, surrendering their allegiance to him.
When Zhang Rang timidly reminded him, "Your Majesty, it's time for your meal," Liu Hong burst into maniacal laughter.
"Have a meal?"
"hehe!"
"Tell the imperial chefs to conserve rice. I might have to go begging with you all tomorrow, and you 'loyal ministers' will all be waiting here!"
Laughter echoed in the empty hall.
As Liu Hong turned and left, the officials in Deyang Palace exchanged glances while rubbing their knees.
"His Majesty is truly desperate..."
"Nonsense! Huangfu Song and his men are already surrounded; Luoyang is next!"
He Jin was surrounded by several military officers seeking advice, while the civil officials gathered to discuss how to "advise His Majesty to temporarily avoid the limelight," which, to put it bluntly, meant to flee.
Several junior eunuchs bent down to tidy up the bamboo slips scattered on the ground and found that many battle reports had been torn apart by Liu Hong, which showed that the emperor was furious.
At this moment, Liu Hong was slumped on his bed in the palace, staring at the ceiling.
Half of his outburst of rage was genuine hatred for the incompetence of his ministers, while the other half was an act; he needed to use fear to bind these "loyal ministers" who each harbored their own ulterior motives.
But recalling the secret report from a few days ago, "The head of Guo Xun, the governor of Youzhou, has been hung on the city wall for three days," he still couldn't help but tremble and murmured:
"Your Majesty, if you are watching from heaven, please grant me a capable fighter... even if all he knows is how to kill!"
(Liu Bang: That's a good idea. Wait a little longer, my dear grandson.)
……
soon.
Liu Hong hastily ate a few mouthfuls of rice, but the more he thought about it, the angrier he became. He slammed down his chopsticks and turned back to Deyang Palace.
Before he even entered the room, he could hear a buzzing murmur inside, where the ministers were whispering amongst themselves in small groups.
Liu Hong's face darkened, and without uttering a word, he strode straight toward the high dragon throne with a gloomy expression.
The officials below, with their sharp eyes, caught sight of the emperor and instantly fell silent. They hurriedly returned to their positions, not daring to utter a sound, for fear of incurring bad luck.
The entire hall was eerily quiet.
Liu Hong plopped down, glanced at the group of officials below, and then remembered all the reports of lost cities and territories and fleeing governors that he had received recently. His anger flared up again.
He grabbed several scrolls of battle reports from the table and threw them down in a flurry, scattering the bamboo slips all over the floor with a clatter. (Eunuch: I really will thank you.)
"Useless! A bunch of good-for-nothings!"
Liu Hong's voice was hoarse with anger as he pointed down and began to curse.
"What use are you to me, keeping you all around? Huh?"
"They always boast about their supposed strategic brilliance and loyalty to the emperor and the country!"
"And now? When the Yellow Turban rebels come, they either cower in fear or run away! My great Han dynasty is about to be ruined by a bunch of fools like you!"
He got more and more into cursing, and without using any vulgar language, he insulted all the officials' ancestors for eight generations.
The officials all shrank back, inwardly groaning:
It seems I can't escape this scolding; I can only hope the court session ends soon so I can go home and calm my nerves.
Liu Hong cursed for the time it takes for an incense stick to burn, his throat parched, before collapsing breathlessly onto the dragon throne, too exhausted to speak.
The main hall was deathly silent. The officials exchanged furtive glances, wondering if they had made it through today's ordeal, and eagerly awaiting the word "off work."
Just then, a deafening roar suddenly came from outside the hall:
"Report—!!!"
The sound was sharp and urgent, carrying the strain of a frantic run, shattering the brief tranquility of Deyang Palace.
All the officials felt a sudden jolt, their hearts sinking to the bottom.
Oh no! Here we go again! Another county must have fallen!
I finally survived two scoldings, and I was just about to go home after a little while longer, but it looks like I can't escape a third scolding!
Several veteran officials had already begun secretly rubbing their temples, preparing for a new round of storms.
Upon hearing the messenger's voice, Liu Hong frowned, waved his hand impatiently, and without even letting the messenger enter the hall, shouted directly to the outside:
"What place has fallen this time? I'm sick of hearing about it! Stop reporting!"
He paused, finding the messenger's noise annoying, and added:
"Also, the messenger who just came to deliver the message made too much noise when he entered the hall, startling me. Drag him out and behead him!"
The messenger outside the palace had just scrambled to the palace gate and was still catching his breath when he heard the emperor say he was going to behead him. He was so frightened that his legs went weak and he collapsed to the ground.
The two fierce imperial guards didn't care about any of that; they stepped forward, grabbed him, and dragged him outside.
The messenger then realized what was happening; the fear of death spurred him to unleash astonishing strength, and he strained his neck, screaming with all his might:
"Your Majesty, please calm your anger! It's a victory report! A great victory at Zhuojun! It's a victory report, Your Majesty!!!"
The announcement of the "good news" seemed to have a magical power, instantly freezing everyone in their tracks.
Liu Hong abruptly sat up straight on the dragon throne, wondering if he had misheard. He looked at the officials below and asked hesitantly:
"What...did you hear him say just now? A...good news?"
The officials looked at each other in disbelief, but their survival instincts compelled them to quickly confirm in unison:
"Your Majesty, it's good news! A great victory at Zhuojun!"
Liu Hong suddenly perked up, his earlier fatigue vanished, and he hurriedly shouted to the Imperial Guards who hadn't gone far:
"Quickly! Bring him back to me! Quickly!"
The imperial guards quickly released their grip and helped the terrified messenger back. (They practically dragged him back.)
Looking at the messenger who was slumped on the ground, pale-faced, Liu Hong put on a stern face and said in a deliberately authoritative tone:
"Hmph! Next time, be more specific when you report to me! I'll spare your life this time, but don't let it happen again!"
"Read it!"
The messenger, still shaken, unfolded the battle report with trembling hands and read it aloud in a tearful voice:
Your humble servant, Liu Ce, Prefect of Zhuojun, respectfully submits this memorial to the Emperor:
In March of the seventh year of the Guanghe era, the Yellow Turban rebel leaders Cheng Yuanzhi and Deng Mao gathered a force of 100,000, claiming to be "under the command of the Heavenly General"...
The rebels, relying on their numbers, acted arrogantly and advanced directly to the walls of Zhuojun City... I personally led the main force to form ranks outside the city...
Having quelled the rebellion in Zhuojun, he dispatched his generals in three columns to rush to the rescue day and night. Within ten days, the counties and prefectures that had fallen in Youzhou were successively recovered.
This is not the achievement of this subject alone, but truly due to Your Majesty's sagacious virtue and far-reaching divine might, as well as the unity of the officials and people of Zhuojun and the bravery of the soldiers...
Your subject, Ce, bows deeply and prostrates himself twice.
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