A lazy bum transmigrates and marries a eunuch – it's awesome!

Many people in Kyoto are destined to have a sleepless night, and the city will be bustling with activity all morning.

Xiao Yuan only slept for two hours before getting up and immediately entering the palace as soon as the palace gates opened.

Preconceived notions are very important; he had to get the matter to the emperor before the morning court session.

It's obvious to anyone with eyes that he benefited from this situation. If someone were to use this as an excuse to claim that he was trying to arrange a marriage exchange, that would be a huge problem.

He had to first convincingly portray himself as the victim, at the very least making sure the emperor didn't think he was dissatisfied with the original marriage arrangement.

Yuxiang Palace.

The newly favored Consort Rou was helping the Emperor dress while casually teasing him with her delicate hands.

The old emperor squinted his cloudy eyes, thoroughly enjoying himself, savoring the excitement of last night and thinking about choosing her again tonight.

Grand Eunuch Xiao Ling stood by the door, holding Fu Chen, waiting quietly, pondering whether he should put his newly adopted son into Consort Rou's palace.

Just then, an inconspicuous little eunuch quietly approached and whispered something in Xiao Ling's ear.

Xiao Ling frowned upon hearing this, and after softly reprimanding the little eunuch a couple of times, he sent him away.

Next came the serving of food. Just as the dishes were laid out, a young eunuch peeked in from the doorway, and this time even the old emperor noticed him.

Xiao Ling quickly apologized, "Your Majesty, it was Xiao Yuan who requested an audience. I was afraid of delaying the court session, so I asked him to wait."

"Xiao Yuan? Didn't I grant him three days off for his wedding yesterday? What's he doing here so early in the morning?"

Consort Rou chimed in, "Could it be that you've gained such a beautiful concubine and have come today specifically to express your gratitude to His Majesty?"

This piqued the old emperor's interest. "I think it's unlikely. Xiao Yuan isn't that ignorant."

Even if one is expressing gratitude, it should be after court; there's no reason for someone to come to your palace and block your way.

"Bring him in. I want to hear what urgent matter has made him so eager to stay that he couldn't even wait until after court."

Xiao Ling answered "yes," and a little eunuch went out. A moment later, Xiao Yuan followed him in and bowed deeply.

The old emperor calmly took a sip of bird's nest porridge. "Didn't I grant you a three-day leave?"

Why are you here instead of staying home with your wife?

Xiao Yuan immediately kowtowed deeply, holding a stack of confessions in both hands, and said in a deep voice,

"This servant has failed His Majesty's grace; I couldn't even protect my wife, and she slept with someone else."

Pfft, the old emperor spat out a mouthful of bird's nest porridge, followed by a burst of laughter.

"Are you here to tell me a joke on purpose, kid?"

"You, the dignified head of the Eastern Depot, have your wife stolen? Who would dare to do that?"

Xiao Yuan immediately looked aggrieved, "Your Majesty, it is Zhao Chengye, the heir of the Duke of Ningguo's mansion and the prized disciple of the Left Prime Minister."

However, this matter cannot be entirely blamed on Prince Zhao, since it was the servant's wife who ran away on her own.

"That Zhao fellow is too quick! We'd barely finished our wedding ceremony when he was already in the bridal chamber."

The old emperor looked suspicious. "Didn't you say your wife ran away?"

Whom did you marry?

"With... Zhao Chengye's wife."

The old emperor burst into laughter again.

Interesting, so interesting.

Xiao Yuan was usually rigid, dull, and boring, but this was the first time the old emperor had found him so funny.

He wasn't in a hurry to go to court now; he just wanted to hear what kind of jokes his useful "sharp blade" had to say.

Seeing the old emperor so happy, Xiao Yuan breathed a sigh of relief. "This servant is deeply grateful to Your Majesty for facilitating a matchmaking for me. I am overjoyed and grateful for Your Majesty's grace."

It has emptied the family's coffers, and the betrothal gifts are likely to have been a disservice to Lord Li's daughter.

Unexpectedly, my mother-in-law is dishonest; she accepted my betrothal gifts but then complained that I was a eunuch.

Taking advantage of the fact that she was getting married on the same day as the Jiang family next door, she used a surrogate to send her daughter to Zhao Shizi's bed.

The eldest daughter of the Jiang family was foolish and had no mother to guide her since childhood. She was switched at marriage without knowing it and was actually helped by a maid from the Li family to bow to a servant.

Actually, if this matter hadn't been made public, it would have been fine. If the arm had been broken, it could have been hidden in the sleeve, and the servant could have quietly replaced it.

As a result, this foolish girl discovered that she had married the wrong person, so she directly lifted her veil and brazenly asked the Left Prime Minister who she should belong to in this situation.

Now that's bad enough, everyone knows that the servant's wife has been sent to the Zhao family, and there's no way to hide it anymore.

But this servant still remembered that it was Your Majesty who acted as matchmaker, so I quickly sent someone to the Zhao family to try and stop them.

If they've just had their wedding ceremony over there too, it'll be much easier; we can just switch back.

Unexpectedly, the Zhao family was much more efficient than the servants; the wedding night was already over.

"Your Majesty, you must do justice for this humble servant! The Li family has gone too far!"

The old emperor never expected that a casually chosen marriage would lead to so much amusement. He had the young eunuch bring over the stack of confessions and looked through them with great interest.

I must say, Xiao Yuan is indeed quite capable; he investigated so thoroughly in just one night.

As the old emperor was watching, Xiao Ling whispered a reminder.

"Your Majesty, you should be attending court. Why not discuss such trivial matters later?"

The old emperor pointed at Xiao Ling and laughed and scolded, "You old codger, you really are petty. It's just that little bit of retirement money that I saved up. It's been seven or eight years and you're still holding a grudge?"

They're brothers with the same godfather, why can't you stand to see him doing well?

Xiao Ling immediately smiled apologetically, "How could this servant dare? I was just afraid of delaying His Majesty's important business."

"My godfather can give his money to whomever he wants; I, a servant, have the Emperor's rewards and don't care for that."

Although Xiao Ling spoke with great magnanimity, he unconsciously glared at Xiao Yuan. The old emperor watched this scene with satisfaction and got up happily, but when he reached the door, he said again that Xiao Yuan should follow.

Xiao Yuan immediately responded and fell behind the emperor, knowing that the matter was probably settled.

As the emperor grew older, he became increasingly capricious, and in many things he did entirely according to his own whims.

To put it bluntly, as long as he's happy, that's all that matters; the truth of the matter, or who is wronged or aggrieved, doesn't matter.

He especially treated the petty squabbles between his ministers as a joke, like watching cockfighting or cricket fighting.

Xiao Yuan thought of all sorts of talking points last night, and in the end, he actually decided to learn from Jiang Xinyu.

He had always appeared too shrewd and capable, which only made the emperor dislike him more and more.

Since that's the case, he might as well do something stupid.

Their old emperor also had a rebellious streak. He might not get what he wanted, but if others desperately tried to prevent him from getting something, the old emperor would step in and fight for it on his behalf.

As the whip cracked three times to clear the way, civil and military officials shouted "Long live the Emperor!" The old emperor sat on his dragon throne, looking down at his prostrate ministers, feeling smug.

Just a glimpse of her sons standing at the front made her feel a little sore.

I remember that he was very happy when the crown prince was first able to participate in government affairs more than ten years ago.

But as the Crown Prince's prestige grew, he became increasingly unhappy.

The crown prince was full of vigor, but he was gradually growing old. He liked it when people said he was good at raising his son, but he didn't want to hear that his son had surpassed him.

He hoped his son would be good, but his son couldn't be better than him.

In order to counterbalance the power of the crown prince, he promoted the second and third sons, which had a good effect, but it was also tantamount to inviting wolves to drive away tigers.

These unfilial sons have become too arrogant.