I transmigrated into the villain's white moonlight, but the protagonist is my brother.

In the end, Xie Yan was torn between her inner voice and her own conscience, but she still couldn't hold back.

She could control her heart, but not her hands.

That hand really should be chopped off.

She belatedly realized something was off, stared at the bookshelf through the crack for a while, and finally pushed the door open.

I'm sorry, Shen Yan, my little angel. Although it was wrong of me to peek into your room, I paid for your leg treatment, so please forgive me.

This was the first time in Xie Yan's life that she had done something so uncertain, and she felt a bit guilty, like a thief caught doing something wrong.

But soon, she was drawn to the scene before her and had no time to pay attention to anything else.

The room was cluttered and messy, like a battlefield that had just been through a major battle.

Books, clothes, and various odds and ends were scattered haphazardly on the floor, chairs, and even tables.

The stark white ceiling and walls were completely unadorned, devoid of wallpaper or decorative paintings, leaving a bare and empty feeling.

The only relatively tidy spot in the room was the small bed at the very back. A plain-colored thin quilt was laid out flat on the bed, and the fluffy pillows looked clean. It was the most normal spot in the room.

Xie Yan wanted to go in a little further, but she was blocked by all sorts of messy things on the ground, making it extremely difficult to move. She had to dodge this and step over that, which was very strenuous.

Good heavens, what on earth is going on?!

You little rascal, you've set up a Bagua formation in your room!

Even mice would get lost if they entered this house!

Are you trying to avoid assassins or what?

She was still feeling a little uncomfortable in her lower abdomen. Clutching her stomach, she carefully avoided the clutter and made her way to the desk.

There was a thick stack of books on the table, including books on mathematics and other subjects. There were also some draft papers on the table with calculation processes written on them.

The handwriting is messy, and you can tell that you put a lot of pressure into it.

One stroke was so forceful that it tore the paper, tearing half of the entire draft paper.

Xie Yan stared at the solution process on the manuscript for a while and realized that the final result was wrong.

This kid, is it really necessary to get so angry and have such a big temper over getting one question wrong?

There were several drawers under the desk. Xie Yan glanced at them and then looked away, showing no intention of looking at them.

It's already immoral of her to sneak into someone else's room, how could she go through the drawers as well? That would really be considered petty theft.

Xie Yan's mood was affected by the messy environment around her, and her heart seemed to be in turmoil, beating very fast.

damn it.

what happened.

That shouldn't be the case. Shen Yan shouldn't be such a messy person.

When he was a child, he often slept on the floor next to his bed. The next morning, even if he was still limping, he would still obediently tidy up his bedding, making it clean and neat.

It's nothing like it now; I can hardly believe it.

She surveyed the room with a serious expression, then walked to the small bed at the very back.

The bedside area wasn't too messy. There was a simple nightlight on the wall with a thin layer of dust on the lampshade, as if it had never been taken down.

There were a few books lying on the bedside table, their spines almost falling apart, clearly having been read countless times, including a comic book that was practically worn out.

At first glance, the cover art style is extremely childish, like something a child would read.

Xie Yan didn't even glance at those books; her attention was entirely focused on the small bottle in the corner.

It looks like a medicine bottle.

She picked up the bottle, wanting to see what kind of medicine it was, but the language on it didn't look like English. She didn't know what language it was, and some letters were cut off, making it hard to read.

Just as Xie Yan was about to take out her phone to search, a thunderous voice rang out from behind her, filled with extremely cold anger.

What are you doing here!

Xie Yan trembled with fright and turned around in a panic, only to see Shen Yan standing silently behind her, having returned at some point.

He had clearly just returned from school, with a dark-colored crossbody bag full of books slung over his shoulder. He was tall and had an expression that Xie Yan had never seen before, icy cold.

Shen Yan's bangs were a bit long, partially obscuring his eyebrows and eyes. His dark, ink-black eyes held an unexpected sharpness, filled with anger.

This was the first time Xie Yan had seen Shen Yan with this expression.

He was tall and slender, with his back to the window, blocking out a large amount of light, which gave Xie Yan an inexplicable sense of oppression.

Shen Yan's gaze shifted downwards, and he saw the medicine bottle in Xie Yan's hand. His pupils contracted sharply, and he snatched the bottle away and threw it aside.

The bottle cap wasn't tightened properly, and the small white pills rolled all over the floor, making a clattering sound as they fell.

"Who gave you permission to enter my room?"

The slender boy's brows were etched with icy coldness, and his voice was chilling to the extreme.

Before, when Shen Yan was always smiling, it wasn't noticeable, but now that he had a stern face, his handsome appearance became exceptionally chilling.

He was already exquisitely beautiful, and usually his gentle demeanor made him seem somewhat approachable. But now, his dark, hollow eyes stared straight at people without any smile, creating an uncanny valley effect.

It felt like being watched by a cursed, alluring ghost, sending chills down one's spine.

He looks completely different now compared to when he was taking care of Xie Yan at the hospital yesterday.

Xie Yan looked at Shen Yan, who was now gloomy and terrifying, and felt her mind go blank.

So strange.

She could even feel the hairs on her arms standing on end, and goosebumps rising on her skin.

"You..." Xie Yan forced herself to ask, "What kind of medicine is that...?"

My wrist suddenly hurts.

The boy didn't answer. He pursed his thin lips, grabbed Xie Yan's wrist, and tried to pull her out.

The floor was a mess, and Shen Yan was taking big strides. Xie Yan was on her period these past two days, so she couldn't keep up with him at all.

Not to mention the things scattered all over the ground; she didn't even have time to step over them.

Xie Yan stumbled and tripped over the humidifier's power cord on the ground, her knee hitting the floor. Shen Yan turned around with a cold expression, grabbed her, and pulled her out of the room.

The force was so great that Xie Yan almost lost her balance and nearly fell again.

She slept all day, wearing a loose, light-colored nightgown. Both her knees were red from banging, and her face was pale, hidden by her messy long hair.

"Shen Yan, what are you doing!"

A loud, clear voice came from the stairwell, seemingly tinged with anger.

Xie Qingyu saw this scene as soon as he arrived. Xie Yan looked like she had been bullied, which immediately made him angry.

He was still wearing a suit jacket and leather shoes. He rushed over in a few steps and stood in front of Xie Yan, confronting Shen Yan at the door with a sullen expression.

With just one glance, Xie Qingyu also noticed that something was wrong with Shen Yan.

Shen Yan's eyes were devoid of any emotion, like a stagnant pool, and he didn't show any obedient expression when facing his older brother Xie Qingyu.

Xie Qingyu frowned, feeling something was off. He mentally asked Xie Yan, "Sister, are you alright?"

It's okay, don't talk about him. It was my fault; I went into his room.

[He shouldn't have pushed you! And with so much force! You just got out of the hospital!]

The man in the suit exuded a very low-key aura, with dark eyebrows and downcast eyes. "Don't you know any manners? Miss Xie is a guest!"

Upon hearing this, a slight smile slowly appeared on Shen Yan's expressionless face.

But this smile was different from usual. He tilted his head slightly, his gaze fixed intently on Xie Yan behind Xie Qingyu, the curve of his lips somewhat sarcastic.

"Miss Xie is very polite; she even cares about what brand of vitamins others take."

Xie Qingyu glared and was about to retort, but was interrupted by Shen Yan's next words.

"Big brother, keep an eye on your fiancée."

After saying that, Shen Yan slammed the door shut, shutting the two of them out.

Xie Yan lowered her head and pursed her lips, feeling embarrassed.

This is the first time in my 28 years of life that I've done something like this, and I even got caught red-handed.

This situation is really awkward.

Xie Qingyu also turned to look at her, and after a while, said, "Let's go back inside and talk."

The two arrived at Xie Yan's room and closed the door.

Xie Yan quickly sat down in a chair to look at her legs; both knees were still hurting.

A patch of red appeared on her fair skin, and it will definitely turn blue by tomorrow, barring any unforeseen circumstances.

Xie Qingyu was very angry.

"Why would you go to his room for no reason? There's definitely something wrong with him. He's the villain, don't you remember?"

He clearly remembered that Shen Yan in the original story had inherited her mother's bad genes in terms of mental health. Don't be fooled by her current act of being a decent person; she'll go crazy later on.

Shen Yan kidnapped the female protagonist, Bai Zhiwei, from her home and imprisoned her on a deserted island in a villa. Bai Zhiwei cried out to heaven and earth in vain, with no way to escape. In despair, she even considered jumping into the sea to commit suicide.

Xie Qingyu felt a chill whenever he thought of this mentally ill person. He simply couldn't equate Bai Zhiwei, this strong and optimistic girl, with the person in the original text who was so desperate and collapsed that he wanted to die.

He really disliked this villain.

Although Shen Yan has changed his name and it differs somewhat from the original text, it seems that he still has significant problems recently.

He is an absolutely dangerous individual.

Xie Yan silently rubbed her knees, unsure how to explain.

Shen Yan was a child she had helped before, and she was originally very pleased to see that he was doing well now.

She only had a slight doubt in her mind, which made her curiosity overcome her reason.

But as it turns out, Shen Yan seems to be quite different from what I imagined.

He seemed to have a split personality, with two completely different faces.

She is well-behaved, loves to smile, and is polite.

One of them was just now. He had a cold look in his eyes, was very strong, and seemed a bit aggressive, like a completely different person.

Xie Yan's wrist is still red from where he grabbed it.

However, it's true that he trespassed first, so it's normal for him to be unhappy; he can't blame anyone else.

Shen Yan just said at the door that he was taking vitamins.

She seemed a little skeptical.

"...I accidentally went to the wrong place," Xie Yan made up.

After all, Shen Yan's room was right next to hers, so it's probably quite normal to accidentally walk into the wrong room... right?

It should be enough to fool Xie Qingyu's limited intelligence.

Sure enough, he looked doubtful. "Really?"

Xie Yan nodded, her tone firm and resolute, "Really."

Xie Qingyu breathed a sigh of relief. "You scared me! I thought you liked him because he's good-looking!"

"..." That's not the case.

In Xie Yan's opinion, no matter how handsome Shen Yan is, he is still a child.

He was only eighteen years old, the same age as Xie Qingyu before he transmigrated. Xie Yan didn't consider such a young boy to be a mature man at all.

Still young.

Xie Qingyu took off his suit jacket and sat down casually on the small sofa, his expression gradually becoming serious.

"But seriously, sis, you'd better stay away from Shen Yan. I'm afraid he might have a mental breakdown and accidentally hurt you again."

Speaking of this, Xie Yan became a little curious again.

At the time, she felt that Shen Yan's part of the story was too depressing, so she stopped watching after watching half of it. She did not know Shen Yan's original situation.

So she asked, "What was the original ending for Shen Yan?"

Xie Qingyu blinked, his expression relaxing a bit. "He's been arrested and is in jail. Don't worry, he's settled and I feel very safe."

Originally, Shen Yan had committed crimes such as kidnapping, intentional injury, and illegal restriction of personal freedom. In addition, the Gu family's power added fuel to the fire, so in the end, she would never be able to get out of prison for the rest of her life.

That's enough for the male and female protagonists to live a peaceful life.

It was a very happy ending; everyone was happy.

Xie Yan didn't know why, but she felt a pang in her heart, as if something had stabbed her, making her feel uncomfortable and suffocated.

For some reason, the image of Xiao Shenyan being locked in a dark room, huddled alone in a corner, flashed into her mind.

Those children, after experiencing the most tragic ordeal, were once again placed in a cold, icy cage.

This time, it's for a lifetime.

...That's it, I can't think about it anymore.

That feeling of heartache for stray cats is about to come back to me.

------

Shen Yan closed the door.

He leaned against the door, head down, his bangs obscuring his eyes, leaving only his sharp, pale chin visible.

It took him a while to raise his head again and examine the layout he had specially created.

It's really chaotic, abnormally chaotic.

He was always very careful and was never discovered. He was the only one who had the key to the room, and the housekeeper did not have a spare key.

But in the end, it was still overlooked.

The setting sun cast a bright glow inside the room, making even the messy traces seem to gleam with a warm luster.

The slender boy returned to the bedside and squatted down.

He picked up the small white pills one by one and put them back into his palm.

One.

Another one.

His white shirt appeared soft in the light, but his face remained expressionless, like a sculpture, a doll, or a beautiful toy.

They just don't look like a living person.

After a long while, they finally filled the mostly empty medicine bottle back up, but many medicines were still missing.

The pills are too small.

Once lost, it can never be found again.

He tightened the screws on the medicine bottle, got up, and went to the bathroom.

The boy's skin, which had never seen the sun for many years, was unbelievably pale. When his shirt was pulled down, it revealed burn marks on his shoulders.

It looks lighter than when I was a child, but the area has also increased, becoming a large patch that stands out surprisingly against my fair skin.

And there are the centipede-like surgical scars on his calves.

Shen Yan stared blankly at the ugly scar on his calf.

He reached out to touch the scar, but then noticed the faint cigarette burns on his arm and the crisscrossing marks on his wrist.

The scabs were dark red and black, messy and extremely ugly.

Annoyance suddenly flashed in Shen Yan's eyes.

He really hates himself.

He hated his own ugly self.

I hate myself for not being good enough.

I hate myself when I wear a mask.

I hate my hypocritical self.

He really is.

I hate this world.