The Eunuch's Declaration of Loyalty

Chapter

"Father, do you believe in resurrection?" Liu Qingtang asked softly, then, without waiting for Liu Shaodi's answer, added, "I died in the autumn of the fifteenth year of Yuanning." (For more text, please search on Baidu or search for Lewen.)

Upon hearing this, Liu Shaodi was somewhat taken aback and blurted out, "How is that possible!"

Liu Qingtang looked at her father, her eyes deep and unfathomable, and continued in a calm tone, "It was poisoned wine bestowed by the emperor. After I died, you and my brother also died. The Liu family, relatives of the empress, intended to rebel. This is the crime the emperor arranged for our deaths."

Liu Shaodi looked at his daughter with a serious and stern expression, his lips pressed together in silence. Liu Qingtang looked at him quietly, also remaining silent.

After a long pause, Liu Shaodi finally spoke, "Are you serious?"

"I still remember the burning pain of the poisoned wine going down my throat, the sorrow of seeing my father and brothers' heads fall to the ground in my confused soul, and the regret of seeing the body of the person who protected me gone... If I could, I would rather it had all been a nightmare."

"But I was tormented by this nightmare day and night, unable to find peace or relief. After death, one should go to hell and be reincarnated, but when I opened my eyes, I found myself back ten years ago, when everything was still salvageable. I was overjoyed and cried tears of relief, but I was also filled with guilt and fear. I couldn't even distinguish between reality and illusion. Several months have passed since I woke up that day, but even now, I still often fall into a daze."

“Father, do you know? Every day I worry that I will go mad because of my unresolved hatred…” And seeing your pain of knowing nothing about everything, I am both relieved that you don’t have to suffer like me, and overwhelmed by this secret that I can only bear alone.

Even if she were to kill the two culprits, the chief ministers, and suppress the emperor in this life, the events of her past life would be etched into her mind and could never be erased. Sometimes, when she suddenly saw Qin Shu's face beside her, she would recall the rotting face crawling with mosquitoes and maggots that she had seen back then. She even felt that Qin Shu, her father, and her brother were all dead, and that the people beside her now were no longer the same as before.

But rebirth, starting life anew—this is such a heaven-defying thing, how could it not come at a price? Perhaps those lingering nightmares are the price she paid for this rebirth. Liu Qingtang knows very well that everything in this world has a cause and an effect; there is no repayment or gain without a reason, just as there is no love without a reason.

The treasure had been shattered and cracked, and even though it was now perfectly intact, she would still remember those cracks. But so what? She would only hold onto the treasure tightly, determined not to give anyone another chance to create a crack. Those things might cause her pain, but they could never defeat her; they would only make her calmer amidst the pain.

A look of pain and confusion appeared on Liu Qingtang's face as she stood there, her fists clenched tightly. The feigned calm she had displayed upon arrival was nowhere to be seen, and the smile that usually graced her eyes was completely gone.

She looked so uncomfortable, yet she was like a slender bamboo, with an unyielding spirit, as if she wanted to support a world.

Looking at his daughter like this, Liu Shaodi sensed the fluctuations in her emotions. This man, who had always stood tall and was regarded by countless people as the soul of the military, was actually somewhat unsteady.

He knew exactly what kind of person his daughter was. She was resilient, stubborn, and strong-willed, and had almost never yielded to him since she was a child. But today, she couldn't help but show this side of herself in front of him. If she hadn't gone through those experiences, his daughter wouldn't have become like this. How could this feeling of being trapped like a beast appear in his little daughter, who was always gentle and kind at heart?

No matter how bizarre the story was, Liu Shaodi still believed it, because he trusted his daughter, the child who valued family and responsibility above all else, and believed that she wouldn't fabricate such a lie to deceive her father.

Once he believed her and recalled what she had said, Liu Shaodi felt immense guilt and self-reproach.

For many years, he guarded the territory of the Southern Dynasty, protecting it from invasion and bringing peace to countless people. Yet, even he could not protect his own family. He failed to save his beloved wife's life then, failed to protect his eldest daughter, and now he cannot even protect his youngest daughter.

Time and again, Liu Shaodi realized his utter powerlessness. The mountain-like man slumped into his chair, a hint of weariness finally showing on his face.

Just as a father understands his daughter, Liu Qingtang also knew what kind of person her father was. Therefore, she suppressed her emotions, took a deep breath, and stepped forward to hug her silent father.

"I failed to save my father and brother, and I failed to protect the Liu family, so I have been immersed in guilt ever since, and I still feel that way now."

Liu Shaodi hesitated for a moment, then put his arm around his daughter's shoulder. He moved his lips a few times and sighed, "This shouldn't be your responsibility. It's my fault for not doing a good job."

It seemed like they had made a start, and the rest would be much easier. Liu Shaodi hugged his daughter, who seemed to be crying silently, and patted her head reassuringly.

“When your mother passed away, she held my hand and told me to take good care of you three siblings. But I never knew how to do it, and now it’s proven that. If she knew, she would definitely scold me severely.”

“In this world, is there anyone who dares to scold you, Father? You can scare people to death with just a frown.” Liu Qingtang didn’t let her father see her red and swollen eyes. She leaned against his broad shoulder and laughed in a slightly hoarse voice.

“Your mother used to always scold me, but she was never afraid of me. You not only look a lot like your mother, but you are also very similar in this respect. You never care about my expression and just do what you want to do.”

She had never met the cheerful, warm, gentle, and generous mother they described, not even in her dreams. She once thought having an older sister was enough, but at the age when she most craved her mother's love, she lost her gentle older sister whom she considered a mother. Afterwards, her closest relatives were only her father and brother. "I'm sorry, Father, I'm afraid I might do things that will make you unhappy in the future."

Liu Qingtang released her father and took a step back, meeting his gaze with unwavering determination: "I can't give up on revenge. I won't let those who hurt us in our past lives go unpunished. I might do things I can't even imagine myself doing, becoming a completely different person from the Liu Qingtang I knew long ago. It might put you in a difficult position, Father. But please forgive my filial impiety; I will definitely follow my own path."

"Huai Xu...you want to kill the emperor too?" Liu Shaodi remained silent for a long time before asking this question.

“That depends on whether he still wants to kill our Liu family.” Liu Qingtang’s eyes were firm and cold as she said this, but considering her father, she softened her tone and said, “I will not touch the emperor unless absolutely necessary, after all, he also has Liu family blood in his body.”

“If it has to go that far, then let me do it,” Liu Shaodi suddenly said, his expression as resolute and unyielding as Liu Qingtang’s. At that moment, the father and daughter seemed remarkably alike.

Liu Qingtang's eyes widened, seemingly unable to believe her father would say such a thing. In her heart, her father would not allow her to harbor such rebellious thoughts. She had thought that at most he would simply turn a blind eye to some of the things she would do in the future, but now he was actually saying that he should do them? Liu Qingtang quickly understood his meaning and, somewhat moved, called out, "Father..."

“I am a father, how can I let my children bear my responsibilities?” Liu Shaodi stood up, straightened his back and looked at the landscape painting hanging on one wall of the study. “Moreover, I am protecting the stability and peace of the entire Southern Dynasty.”

At this moment, Liu Qingtang felt a heavy burden lifted from her heart. She had initially thought the worst outcome would be her father's disbelief in her and his severing ties with his unfilial daughter. Fortunately, he chose to believe her, and her fears were dashed. Listening to her father's words, Liu Qingtang felt a sense of security, yet she also felt an urge to cry, for she finally felt at peace and relaxed.

After speaking for a while, and roughly telling her father about the grudges from her past life, Liu Qingtang said, "Perhaps you still find it hard to accept, after all, the thing about being resurrected is too bizarre. Then give me a year to make you completely believe it. A year later, the Zhou Kingdom will go to war with our Southern Dynasty, and the final outcome will be the defeat of the Zhou Kingdom."

"Although the Zhou Kingdom is not as powerful as our Southern Dynasty, they have a general who is also revered as a god of war. How could they be easily destroyed?" Liu Shaodi found it hard to accept. If there was anyone in this world who could be considered his opponent, it would undoubtedly be General Zheng of the Zhou Kingdom. He was both his opponent and his friend. This is probably what it means for heroes to cherish each other.

“Because of the internal strife in Zhou, and that general died on the battlefield due to the suspicion of the Zhou emperor, even his remains were collected by you, Father.” Even though he was a general from another country, Liu Qingtang still greatly admired General Zheng, and couldn’t help but sigh at this moment. However, it was just a sigh, and she quickly became serious and said, “I understand that you still have some doubts in your heart, Father, so let’s use this incident a year from now as a benchmark. If it really happens, then please trust me completely, Father.”

Liu Shaodi gave his daughter a deep look. How could he not understand that this was actually his daughter wanting him to have time to accept the situation? She knew he believed her, but the idea of ​​dealing with the emperor, whom she had doted on as a grandson for so long, and personally disrupting the current peace of the court was something he was still struggling to accept. That's why she gave him this year.

Having tacitly approved of his daughter's considerate behavior, Liu Shaodi felt a mixture of relief and complicated emotions.

He thought that his daughter's words about being brought back to life and the war a year later had made him calm about everything, but Liu Shaodi did not expect that during lunch, his daughter would throw him another piece of news that would shock him.

Author's Note: One more chapter to come.