I am not Ximen Qing.

"certainly"

"Don't cry, daughter. We'll go to the aquarium to see orcas in a little while, okay?"

"Su Meimei, are you ready?"

"Director, I forgot my lines,"

"Carry me again."

"sorry,"

"We're pressed for time, don't delay."

Su Meimei plays a mother who runs away with Lao Yang's daughter. Lao Yang plays a hero; in the end, justice prevails over evil. Su Meimei is the actress Song Yu picked out from the front gate.

However, Su Meimei was a lucky girl from Wuyishan. At the gate of the Beijing Film Studio, pretty girls were all in danger because they were either crazy, mentally ill, or homosexual. Scammers would prey on young girls for love and romance. The scammers would first introduce them to a magical old locust tree near the main gate, where a monkey climbed up and attained enlightenment, becoming a prominent figure in China. They would also mention the many romantic tales and love stories that unfolded under the tree, and the nearby Yuan Dynasty City Wall Relics Park, where many romantic encounters were said to happen at night. In reality, Song Yu's motivation for making the film was more about winning the heart of a girl from Wuyishan. Having broken up with his girlfriend long ago, he had finally found his ideal target. Under the guise of filming, he secretly met Su Meimei, engaging in romantic encounters at Western restaurants and small bars in Nanluoguxiang. She would guide him through memorizing the script in the mornings and afternoons. After two days of filming, Su Meimei didn't return to her temporary, dilapidated rented apartment; she officially became Song Yu's girlfriend. Su Meimei was exactly the slender type Song Yu liked—not as voluptuous as his girlfriend, but undeniably hot.

With Zheng Heng's enthusiastic encouragement—mostly Cantonese and Fujianese—acting as a go-between, the matchmaker has become noticeably more extravagant lately, spending more lavishly than before. He's no longer the same guy who used to lead his gang of friends to eat at Song Yu's place. Love, ah, if he thinks it's too slow, he'll organize a film crew and make the girl an actress. Because in dreams, it's easy to forget reality, easy to become mentally unstable, and girls are most foolish in dreams, making love easiest to obtain.

Perhaps Su Meimei saw Song Yu's cronies, including Lao Ren and Lao Yang, all with children. Having joined the filming for free as a friend, Su Meimei now felt that Song Yu was a trustworthy and good man. She imagined their love blossoming after the film was finished. The naive Su Meimei also needed the nourishment of love, feeling lonely far from home. They were so romantic; love between a man and a woman was just a thin veil, and once that veil was broken, there was no shame. Su Meimei liked to cook, and her cooking was quite light. Southern women are generally virtuous. They would go to Tianhong to watch movies and eat. Meimei was a fashion designer who had graduated from a fashion academy. She had planned to travel alone from the south to Beijing to make a living, but her family didn't support her venturing out on her own. Her parents were traditional fruit farmers in the southern countryside, growing tropical fruits. They only secretly left a letter. She only had a few hundred yuan with her on the long journey from Fujian to Beijing. She stayed in small hotels costing fifty or sixty yuan a day for several days. When her money was almost gone, she learned by chance that she could work as an extra at the gate of the Beijing Film Studio.

The backpack contained only one book, a sketchbook on women's fashion design. Naturally, at such a young age, she couldn't stay still all the time. Meimei studied fashion design books, all of which Song Yu had specially gone to Wangfujing Bookstore to buy. Occasionally, she would also draw a few small sketches and cut fabric. For the fabric, Song Yu simply went to the time-honored Ruifuxiang to buy a large amount of precious silk fabric. At least Meimei wouldn't have to worry about her future livelihood. She was quite polite to Song Yu's friends. Zheng Heng, who was also from the south, would occasionally visit Song Yu's house to discuss film-related business. She would cook exquisite dishes.

Southern girls prefer to cook light dishes. The dialects of Guangdong and Fujian are quite similar, and they occasionally chatted animatedly. Song Yu couldn't understand a word of their Hakka dialect; to her, it was a completely foreign language. "Why don't you speak English?" she wondered.

"No way!"

"Speak Mandarin, please don't use your dialect, okay?"

"It's familiar to talk in the local dialect; it feels like home."

"Don't misunderstand, don't misunderstand, the food is delicious!"

Because of Su Meimei's presence, Zheng Heng clearly developed a fondness for her and naturally became much closer to Song Yu. Zheng Heng remained the same, forever pursuing his ideal goddess like Don Quixote, occasionally bringing along pretty students from the Communication University of China's School of Media and Film—of course, these were all nominally affiliated with a diploma mill, just training institutions using the university's name to offer degrees. Song Yu sometimes thought Zheng Heng was actually dating, even going to karaoke with him. But Zheng Heng remained serious, behaving like a bookworm in front of pretty girls. Song Yu would just make normal jokes behind his back.

"Zheng Heng, I don't know how you can always get them to come. Do you actually want to be in a relationship or...?"

"Misunderstanding? It's all a business necessity, nothing else."

"There's really nothing else to it, it's all about business, but what exactly is business for you?"

"Well? We'll have to keep this a secret for now. I'm a respectable person, right?"

"You old lecher. You have the guts but not the heart to steal. When will you ever take the first step?"

"Not at all, they all say I'm kind-hearted and they feel safe with me. Considering how much they trust me, Zheng Heng, I can't let them down."

"But what exactly can you offer them?"

"It offers them a chance to become famous. Gaining their trust is incredibly difficult; every girl in the industry knows that Zheng Heng is the most reliable."

"Reliable my foot! They don't even appear in your works!"

"They're different from those wandering江湖 (jianghu) people, hehehehe."

"Get what? Get what? Your clown-like, low-class work..."

"They are the touchstone, aren't they? They need to understand that the works depict ordinary people, from the little to the great, showing that anything is possible as long as you have a dream."

Zheng Heng almost never openly revealed his true thoughts. Whether he had ambition or not, his respectful attitude towards them showed that he was genuinely afraid—afraid that they might suddenly turn into shrewish tyrants, and he wouldn't even have a chance to see them again. Yet, none of these girls ever seemed to ultimately enter his life.

“Zheng Heng, break through your inhibitions. Don’t care about them too much. The more you act like that, the more they’ll think you have no charm at all.”

"That's true, but what can I do if I don't know how or dare to? Isn't this fine? The key is whether they approve of me as a person. I just don't believe that no one approves of me."

"Do I like you?"

"That's too vulgar, not what I want,"

"Zheng Heng, you're too good at making a big show of things,"

"So, because I was too high-profile before, I want them to understand how humble I, Zheng Heng, am,"

"How about we make a bet?"

"No, I would never force someone into gambling, drugs, prostitution, or emotional manipulation."

"Who told you to get involved in gambling, prostitution, and drugs?"

"I also hate deception and drinking, because my philosophy of life is to be shameless yet noble."

He's quite self-deprecating. The characters in his works are all unfortunate souls living at the bottom of society, like pigs and dogs. Perhaps few understand that Zheng Heng's portrayal of these lowlifes ironically elevates him to a higher level in real life. He plays self-deprecating, self-degrading clowns in his roles, yet in reality, he's transcendent. And no one can break his discipline. In real life, Zheng Heng is a pure human being without any vices. He's a prolific filmmaker, capable of writing three short scripts a day. He's a director, screenwriter, actor, and even a producer skilled in post-production software. His philosophy is the purity of art, isn't it? Spending money is a desecration of art. Art built on money is garbage. There are countless ambitious young people in the corners of Beijing who want to realize their dreams. Art requires experiencing life, doesn't it? It doesn't require much money. The actors he chooses are almost all homeless people sleeping in McDonald's, Starbucks, and KFC at night.

What about actresses? Women, well, they have a natural advantage, something wandering artistic youths can't possess. Like great Western playwrights, Molière could create a masterpiece with just a nose, and Gogol, the Russian, was the same. Theatrical casting is about the evil, good, ugliness, and beauty of human nature. Only after experiencing the tragedies and comedies of life can they naturally reveal the brilliance of drama. Some people are born actors, but that's less desirable than those born tormented by life, barely clinging to life. Only after peeling away the layers of hypocrisy like an onion can the true essence of great dramatists be revealed. Zheng Heng wanted these homeless, dream-filled, hungry, pure souls.

Society strips away their last remaining cloak of hypocrisy, revealing their genuine ugliness, beauty, and virtue—the last remnants of life. Yet, these very remnants are precisely the magnificent art that Zheng Heng needs.

Are you ghosts?

"It should be us."

Are they ghosts to us?

"You are still human, you have a human soul."

"Then how can I become one of you?"

"I scorched my stomach in the sun, hungry and exposed to the elements; I slept in the rain under the trees, drenched in the cold wind."

"why?"

"For no other reason than to be a true actor."

"Is it an actor or a ghost?"

"At least being an actor is a shortcut to hell, to becoming a ghost,"

Are you hungry?

"Not only am I hungry, I also want to take a hot shower,"

"That won't do,"

"You're afraid we'll become human like you."

"Do you still want to make movies? And all as lead actors?"

"I'd love to be an actor, it's much better than being a corpse. Where can I become one?"

"So before the film is made, you have to keep going hungry. When actors are well-fed and watered, they're no longer actors; you're the natural-born actors. What I want to film is how you turned me into a ghost."

Aren't you afraid that you'll end up with mental problems like me?

"Wrong. People who claim to have mental problems, even if they don't, are actually mentally ill. But do you have mental problems?"

"I don't act up during the day, but I start acting strangely as soon as night falls."

"Get out here, the mental hospital won't accept imposters like you,"

“I do have mental problems, ask them.”

"But I only need a few actors,"

“Yes, we’re not mentally ill, he admits he is,”

"How kind of you! Since everyone agrees you're mentally ill, step forward."

“They have mental illness just like me,”

"Yes, you mentally ill person, come out now. Have a proper bowl of instant noodles, take a good shower, and you'll have another chance until you're fully recovered. Don't come back to me until you're no longer mentally ill."

"It's so difficult. I'm just like you. Only those who aren't mentally ill can become actors."

The question is whether humans are mentally ill, or whether they are not.

"Now we can eat, drink, poop, and sleep together."

"We're scared,"

Why be afraid?

“Once you become comfortable here, you can no longer wander, and then you can no longer be a real actor.”

"Now we're all studying human mental problems, ultimately heading down a path of madness. Is mental illness really mental illness? I've always suspected that humanity itself is the one with mental illness, and that the remaining human souls are our saviors."