Water Margin: The Tale of Li Erlang of Guankou

After laughing through the four trials, Li Han returned to the table to drink. Just then, he noticed that Han Cunbao, who had previously driven away Gao Yanei, was actually dragging a blue-and-white porcelain wine jar towards his table.

"What advice does Governor Han have for me?"

Li Hanxiao rose and bowed. Han Cunbao placed the blue-and-white porcelain wine jar on the table and also cupped his hands, saying, "Just now, Your Excellency broke through those four barriers. I saw it from above. It is rare that Your Excellency broke through four barriers without being tempted by women. You are truly a hero. I have come here to drink a cup with you all. Is that alright?"

The crowd already had a good impression of Han Cunbao, and besides, he was a military governor of a town, so it wouldn't be good to refuse him. Therefore, Li Hanxiao invited Han Cunbao to take a seat.

As soon as Han Cunbao took his seat, Wen Huanzhang raised a cup of wine and respectfully asked, "Governor Han, how is the Grand Tutor in health these days?"

Upon hearing this, Han Cunbao turned his gaze to Wen Huanzhang, only to find that the man looked very familiar.

"You...have we met before?"

"Governor Han has a good memory. I am the one who was punished for writing 'On the Yi River' back then, but was saved by the Grand Tutor..."

Upon hearing Wen Huanzhang's reminder, Han Cunbao immediately remembered, "So it was you. My uncle often mentioned you, saying you were a talented person, it's a pity that back then..."

Han Cunbao came to drink with Li Hanxiao because he had taken a liking to Li Hanxiao. Having just broken through four levels, Li Hanxiao's talent, literary skills, martial arts, and demeanor were all evident. He was a talent that was one in a million, and Han Cunbao really wanted him to serve the country.

"Alas, this matter is over, let's not talk about it. Governor Han, Li Erlang toasts you!"

Li Hanxiao poured a cup of wine, and Han Cunbao waved his hand, "We are both martial artists, and men should bring out big bowls!"

As the bartender placed the large bowls on the table, Han Cunbao filled them with wine from the blue-and-white porcelain vat, raised the bowl to Li Han, and smiled, "How about drinking three bowls in a row?"

"Okay! I'm willing to accompany you!"

Li Hanxiao and Han Cunbao downed three large bowls of wine in a row, their faces flushed and pores bulging, but they were of one mind and laughed heartily.

"Sir Wen is exceptionally talented. Drinking like this is truly unrefined. Why don't you lead us in a drinking game?"

Han Cunbao suddenly spoke up, and Wen Huanzhang nodded and said, "Today we are drinking, so why don't we each tell a story of a hero drinking? If anyone can't, they'll be punished with a glass of water."

"Very well! I'll go first. I'm talking about something that happened during the Tianxi era of Emperor Zhenzong of this dynasty. It was Cao Bin's son, Cao Wei, who was hosting a banquet for his officials at the army's front. Cao Wei was drinking at the banquet when he suddenly disappeared. A moment later, he threw the enemy's head in front of the banquet. He is truly a hero."

"The Cao family generals are truly heroes!"

Everyone said.

"Hey buddy, come here!"

After Han Cunbao finished speaking, he asked Wang Yin to speak. Wang Yin readily replied, "Well... I'll say that Guan Yu warmed his wine before beheading Hua Xiong and went to the banquet alone, scaring the Jiangdong rats out of their wits. Wouldn't that count as a hero drinking wine?"

"Lord Guan's loyalty and righteousness will last forever, and his good name will be remembered for all time. He is a role model for us martial artists. He is truly worthy of praise!"

When it was Li Hanxiao's turn, he spoke up, "I'm talking about Liu Bang, the founder of the Han Dynasty, who started a rebellion after getting drunk and slaying a snake. Can he be considered a hero?"

Han Cunbao immediately retorted, "No, no, that Liu Bang was a local ruffian, a despicable villain, utterly without integrity!"

Li Han chuckled and sighed, then retorted, "That's a misconception. Emperor Gaozu of Han, who rose up with a three-foot sword to slay a white snake, was just a village headman, yet he eventually conquered the world, pacified Qin and destroyed Chu, and established the Han Dynasty, which lasted for four hundred years. Was that really the work of an incompetent man? Besides, many heroes and valiant men under Liu Bang were willing to die for him. Don't you see Zhou Ke and Ji Xin? How can such figures not be worthy of the title of hero?"

Li Hanxiao's argument left Han Cunbao speechless, so he could only raise his wine bowl and say, "I underestimated Emperor Gaozu of Han. I'll drink a cup of wine as punishment!"

Finally, it was Wen Huanzhang's turn. Han Cunbao had just been punished with a night of drinking, so he wanted to mess with Wen Huanzhang. He said, "Mr. Wen, you come here. You are a talented man. You can't talk about ordinary people. You need to tell some unusual stories."

Upon hearing this, Wen Huanzhang laughed twice, leaned back, and spoke wildly, quite like Li Bai, "What's so difficult about this? I'm not bragging, but I have at least eight hundred allusions in my mind, if not a thousand, and I can just pick them up at will."

"What you all just talked about was either the Han Dynasty or the present dynasty. Now I want to talk about the old story of Duke Mu of Qin during the Spring and Autumn Period."

The three men immediately became interested. "What heroic deeds does Duke Mu have related to drinking?"

"Now, it is said that Duke Mu of Qin once lost several imperial horses, which were captured and eaten by more than three hundred wild men from the foot of Mount Qi. Qin officials caught up with these people and brought them before Duke Mu, intending to bring them to justice."

"But Duke Mu of Qin said, 'Virtuous people in ancient times would not harm people because of livestock. They despise people and value animals. I would rather kill a horse for the people than harm them for a few horses.'"

"At that time, most people believed that horse meat was poisonous and that drinking alcohol could cure it. Therefore, Duke Mu of Qin not only did not blame them, but also ordered people to give them wine to drink."

"This isn't a hero drinking wine, it's a thief."

Wang Yin said.

"There is another story after that. In the twelfth year of Duke Mu of Qin, the State of Jin suffered from drought and sent people to Qin to ask for rice. Because Qin and Jin had a long-standing grudge, the ministers advised Duke Mu not to send grain. Baili Xi said that although the ruler of Jin had offended his own ruler, what crime had his people committed? So Duke Mu of Qin allocated grain to relieve Jin. The long grain transport team stretched from the capital of Qin to the capital of Jin, and it was known in history as the Battle of the Boats."

"In the fourteenth year of Duke Mu of Qin, the Qin state suffered a famine and sent people to the Jin state to request grain aid. Duke Yi Wu of Jin not only refused, but also took advantage of the situation to launch an attack on Qin. In the ninth month of the fifteenth year of Duke Mu of Qin, the battle took place at Hanyuan."

"At that time, both Duke Mu of Qin and Duke Hui of Jin personally led their troops into battle. Duke Mu was surrounded and wounded by the Jin army and was on the verge of death."

"The State of Jin repays kindness with enmity; they are not human!"

Han Cunbao started cursing angrily.

"At this critical moment, suddenly more than three hundred wild men on horseback charged into the rear of the Jin army, relieving the Qin army's siege. They all fought bravely and risked their lives, not only enabling Duke Mu of Qin to escape, but also capturing Duke Yi Wu of Jin alive. It turned out that these were the horse-eating wild men at the foot of Mount Li. When those three hundred men heard that Duke Mu of Qin was besieged by the Jin army, they all took weapons and traveled thousands of miles to follow the army, fighting to the death for Duke Mu of Qin to repay his kindness of feeding him horses and drinking wine. After the battle, these people disappeared again, leaving without a trace, concealing their identities and names. This is the origin of the story of Duke Mu of Qin drinking wine and stealing horses, and the Chu guest repaying the broken tassel. I, Wen Huanzhang, am most fond of this story. My conduct is also like that of these wild men, for the kindness of being recognized, a scholar will die for one who understands him."

"You are a hero among men, and your people are heroes among your people!"

Upon hearing this, the three of them couldn't help but applaud in admiration.

"Excellent! Excellent! All three of you are heroes. I, Han Cunbao, have something to say from the bottom of my heart that I must say. Please listen carefully!"

After speaking, Han Cunbao became serious and sat up straight. "Li Erlang and Mr. Wen are both men of true talent and learning. Mr. Wen just mentioned the kindness he showed me, which made me feel very grateful. As the saying goes, a thousand-mile horse is common, but a good one is rare. Now that the border war is tense, it is an opportunity for those with ambition to make contributions. I am not boasting, but if you two are willing, after I return to the capital to report on my duties, you can come with me to serve under my command and contribute to the country. Li Erlang can first become a general in the army, and Mr. Wen can become an advisor. In the future, you will also be able to get a title and a position for your wives and children!"

Han Cunbao was also slightly drunk at this point, and his tone was quite sincere, which Li Hanxiao and the others could all see.

However, they dared not harbor any illusions about the imperial court.

"Thank you for your kind offer, Military Governor Han, but I have no intention of joining the army!"

Li Han smiled and politely declined, then punished himself with a drink to save face for Han Cunbao.

Wen Huanzhang sighed, “Grand Tutor Han is my savior, and I should not refuse him. However, the late emperor decreed that I should never be employed. If Governor Han were to employ me, I fear I would be impeached by treacherous officials. How could I be at peace with myself?”

Seeing the attitude of the two men, Han Cunbao understood that they did not want to join the army. He sighed and said, "Very well, there are 360 ​​professions. As long as you are upright and honest, you can excel in any profession. I will stay in Tokyo for a few more days. If you need anything, you are welcome to come and find me. I have things to do today, so I will not stay any longer. Farewell!"

Han Cunbao made his exit at the opportune moment, and Li Hanxiao and the other two saw him off. Upon returning, they couldn't help but sigh that if there were more officials like Han Cunbao, it would be quite beneficial to the country and the people.

By this time, they had already drunk several rounds of wine and eaten several dishes, but Ma Lin still hadn't returned. The three of them were starting to have doubts, so Wang Yin suggested that they go out into the street to look for him instead of waiting there in vain. Therefore, Li Hanxiao paid the bill for the wine and went downstairs to look for him.

Just as he reached the entrance of Fanlou, Li Hanxiao felt a sudden tightness in his chest and exclaimed in alarm. Having served in the military for many years, he had developed a sixth sense, and he sensed that something was wrong.

However, before they could even prepare, two baskets of quicklime were thrown up from both sides, turning into a white mist that enveloped Li Hanxiao and his two companions.

Li Hanxiao was caught off guard and his face was covered in quicklime, making it impossible for him to open his eyes.

"Oh no! Drinking has made things worse, and my reactions are slow!"

Li Hanxiao cried out in despair. At this moment, he dared not open his eyes. If the quicklime got into his eyes, it would surely blind him.

"Was it him who broke through those four barriers? Attack him!"

Upon hearing this, Li Han smiled and realized it was Gao Yanei's voice.

It turned out that Gao Yanei had not left before. He was a lustful man and could not give up such a tempting prize as Li Shishi. He waited outside Fanlou with a group of servants, intending to cause trouble and snatch her away after Han Cunbao left.

Unexpectedly, after waiting for a long time without seeing Han Cunbao emerge, they heard that someone had broken through four barriers!

Gao Ya thought to himself that someone else had snatched the swan meat that was about to be eaten, and he was so angry that the veins on his face turned red and his features shifted. He wanted to go in, but he was afraid that Han Cunbao was inside.

The hangers-on gave him a suggestion: wait for Han Cunbao to come out, and then they would lay a trap here. Once the man who broke through the four gates came out, they would beat him up and throw him into the canal to vent Gao Yanei's anger!

Sure enough, as soon as Han Cunbao left, Gao Yanei knew his chance had come. He sent someone to inquire about Li Hanxiao's appearance and waited for him to come to him.

"Cough cough!"

Wen Huanzhang's face was stained white like Cao Cao in Peking Opera by quicklime, and he coughed like he had tuberculosis. It was only because Wang Yin reacted quickly and blocked it that his eyesight was not damaged.

At this moment, Gao Yanei's henchman Zhong Xianhan stepped forward and started lashing out with fire. Some used sticks, some wielded sticks, some swung dustpans, some threw locks, some grabbed birdcages, some threw clods of dirt, and some threw mud. They attacked the three men relentlessly.

"who!"

Wang Yin quickly used his hands to block the various things hitting him, then spun around and leaped onto the large stone lion in front of Fanlou, finally escaping the smoke of lime powder.

"Hit! Hit hard!"

Gao Yanei commanded his men to attack Li Hanxiao and Wen Huanzhang, who were blind and unable to defend themselves.

"Shh!"

While blindly dodging, Li Hanxiao whistled to summon eagles and hunting dogs to come to his rescue.

"Howl!"

Because the eagle arrived by flying and was the fastest, it immediately grabbed a small companion from the crowd, flapped its wings repeatedly, and actually lifted him into the sky.

Wang Yin also set his sights on Gao Yanei, jumped down from the stone lion, and unleashed a flurry of punches and kicks at the thugs. The thugs were no match for him, and were beaten until they cried out in pain.

Li Hanxiao had been hit by several blows when he suddenly heard the sound of a sharp weapon cutting through the air. A person landed steadily next to him and, with a few swift moves, forced back the thugs surrounding Li Hanxiao.

"Brother Li! You've suffered!"

"So it's the Ma Bian brothers!"

Li Hanxiao recognized the voice; it was Ma Bian who had come to his aid.

"Hey! Who dares to hit my brother!"

Just then, "Iron Flute Immortal" Ma Lin arrived at Fanlou with a group of ruffians. They encountered a fight, and Ma Lin shouted, grabbed a carrying pole from a nearby load, and led Zhang San, Li Si, Wang Wu, Zhao Liu, Zhou Qi, Xie Ba, Liu Shiyilang, Zhu Erdan, Yang Mazi, Hua Bozi, Luo Laowai, and more than a dozen other ruffians to rush up and start beating Gao Yanei's men.

Gao Yanei didn't expect Li Hanxiao's gang to have outside help. In addition, the scene was too chaotic, and no one could see who was who. Ma Lin didn't know that he was Gao Yanei. His scoundrels were beaten and ran away by the hooligans around the Daxiangguo Temple.

"Son of a bitch!"

Ma Lin didn't recognize Gao Yanei, so he stepped forward and swung his carrying pole straight at Gao Yanei, slapping him so hard that Gao Yanei's face was covered in bruises and he fell to the ground.

"Damn it! Why did you hit Gao Yanei? Brother Li, this is no place to stay. Call your men and come with me!"

Ma Bian pulled Li Hanxiao away, and Wang Yin, seeing this, called for everyone to follow. Gao Yanei had been beaten, and the Imperial Guards were about to arrive. If they didn't leave now, no one would be able to escape.

Ma Bian led the group through three or five long streets, through seven or eight alleys, and finally, after many twists and turns, they entered a courtyard and stopped.

"Thank you for your help, Brother Ma Bian, but where is this place?"

Li Han smiled so hard he couldn't see, and had no idea where he had run off to.

"This is a secluded place. We should wait until things have calmed down before you all go out."

"Brother, you've brought all the people you asked to find, so why did they start fighting?"

Ma Lin beckoned the group of ruffians to Li Hanxiao. Li Hanxiao, unable to see, could only speak, "So, these ruffians, I know you used to follow Master Lu Zhishen and know about Instructor Lin's injustice. I am an old friend of both of them. I have come here to take Madam Lin and her family out of the city. Do you dare to lend me a hand?"

Zhang San, the "street rat," stepped forward and said with great bravado, "Brother, although we are ruffians, we value loyalty. We all know about what happened to Instructor Lin, and we only regret that we cannot avenge Instructor Lin and Master Lu. Since you are their friend, we brothers are willing to help you avenge Instructor Lin!"

"Alright! Since that's the case, then we're practically brothers... Oh dear..."

Li Hanxiao's face stung from the burning quicklime, and he couldn't help but cry out. When the hooligans saw this, they took out the water gourds they were carrying and offered to wash Li Hanxiao's face with clean water.

"Oh no! You mustn't! Using water will scald the skin and flesh!"

Ma Bian quickly stopped the ruffians and said to Wang Yin and Ma Lin, "Their eyes are stained with lime. If not treated properly, they could go blind. Both Young Master Li and Mr. Wen are in the same situation and can only be treated by a renowned doctor. I do know a famous doctor nearby. Do you trust me?"