Locking away my heart and love! Going back to 2000 to be a top student again.

Xu Su nestled in bed, staring at the ceiling, seemingly lost in thought, her face devoid of any emotion.

She didn't sit up until the door was swiped with a magnetic card and then kicked open from the outside, her brows furrowed.

Shen Chen, his eyes bloodshot, rushed in.

The door closed behind him, and his eyes were fixed on the bed where Xu Su was alone.

He glanced at it and rushed to the bathroom.

They searched the place thoroughly, inside and out, even behind the curtains.

Xu Su went from being panicked and nervous at the beginning to almost sneering as she watched.

Wrapped in her bathrobe, she leaned against the bed, quietly watching his display of infidelity.

Finally, having searched everywhere without finding anyone, Shen Chen strode to the bedside, his eyes still red, and asked through gritted teeth, "Where is he?"

"They're gone," Xu Su said frankly. "About ten minutes ago."

Her eyes were also red and slightly swollen, just like the marks left after being roughed up in bed.

Shen Chen stared intently into her eyes, then suddenly bent down and ripped open the collar of her nightgown.

Xu Su's clothes were sent to the dry cleaners, and her bathrobe was completely empty underneath.

Caught off guard, she was almost completely exposed. Her brows furrowed, and she quickly raised her hand to close her collar.

Although they have been honest with each other countless times, it doesn't mean she's happy to be treated like this in the current situation.

In that short time, Shen Chen was able to see the marks from her neck to her chest.

His face was deathly pale. He gripped her wrist with one hand and continued to pull open her collar with the other, stroking the red marks on it.

He asked in a trembling voice, "What is this?"

"Don't you know?" Xu Su tried to break free, but when she found she couldn't, she simply gave up and said, "It's just what you think, I'm no longer clean."

It’s not clean anymore…

Shen Chen's teeth chattered, and the force in his hands became increasingly heavy.

"Let me go!" Xu Su was in some pain from being rubbed and began to struggle again.

Given the vast difference in strength between men and women, not to mention his professional training in Sanda and boxing, she would have no way to break free if Shen Chen wanted to.

Xu Su didn't struggle for long before her wrist was released.

Shen Chen was still standing by the bed, staring blankly at her with bloodshot eyes.

That look in his eyes was incredibly complex.

Love and hate intertwined, with a hint of despair lingering within.

"Jiang Chusheng, right?" He chuckled and turned to walk out.

"What are you going to do!" Xu Su shouted, clutching her chest.

He didn't stop.

Xu Su hurriedly threw off the covers, ran out of bed, and went to the door to stop him.

“It has nothing to do with Jiang Chusheng, you don’t need to take your anger out on others.”

Her clothes were disheveled, and the red marks on her collar were very obvious.

Shen Chen could no longer contain his anger. He grabbed her arm and dragged her into the bathroom, forcing her to look at herself inside.

"It's alright?" His hand slid down her neck, the series of red marks disappearing into her chest. His voice was tinged with blood. "Is it because I can't satisfy you? Why are you humiliating me like this!"

"We can break up!"

Xu Su gripped her collar. "I've humiliated you. I'm no longer innocent. Let's break up. Don't worry, I'll never bother you again."

She always insisted on her innocence and purity, bringing the man, whose rationality was on the verge of collapse, back to his senses.

"What do you mean?"

I said let's break up!

"Don't even dream about it," Shen Chen tightened his arms around her, his eyes red as he glared at her. "If you dare to abandon me, I'll kill Jiang Chusheng!"

"..."

During the argument, Xu Su fell silent for a moment after hearing his words. She calmed down and said, "I cheated on you. I slept with another man just half an hour ago. Aren't you going to break up with me?"

"Why?" He still held her tightly, his voice choked with emotion, "Tell me why. Didn't you say you liked me?"

why?

Xu Su recalled the dismissive words she had heard, and the pain in her heart continued.

She shouldn't let herself get hurt anymore.

“I’m tired of it,” she said. “We’ve been sleeping together for over a year, aren’t you tired of it?”

Shen Chen seemed not to have heard the two light, airy words clearly.

"What did you say?"

"I said……"

Before she could finish speaking, he covered her lips tightly.

"Shut up!" he shouted in despair, tears streaming uncontrollably from his eyes.

Xu Su stopped struggling and looked at the man in the mirror, his eyes bloodshot, crying uncontrollably.

After a long silence, she pulled off his wrist. "Let's talk."

"I won't break up," Shen Chen hugged her tightly, his voice trembling, "I won't break up."

"..." Xu Su's face was forced to be buried in his chest, her nostrils filled with the smell of his alcohol and the perfume of a strange woman, and the pity she had just felt vanished.

She gripped his waist and pushed him away slightly, saying calmly, "I've had someone else; I'm not clean anymore."

Shen Chen's expression twisted for a moment, but he forced a smile. "Was it a moment of impulse after drinking? It's okay... I don't care."

Xu Su knew he was a considerate boyfriend, but she never expected him to be this considerate.

He even came up with a reason for her to cheat.

She paused for a few seconds, then said, "I do care."

Shen Chen's expression froze. "What do you mean?"

“I said I care,” Xu Su said. “Perhaps you often act impulsively when you’re drunk, but I won’t, I…”

"I didn't either!" Shen Chen interrupted hastily. "I've never acted impulsively while drunk. I've only ever been with you."

...The man in front of me was genuinely concerned about his innocence being misunderstood.

Realizing this, Xu Su pursed her lips, seemingly unable to continue speaking.

We've known each other for four years and dated for one.

She could feel that this man had always given her a sincere and genuine heart throughout his life.

She was indeed moved and reciprocated his love.

Those memories are all in her mind, and she can't erase them, which is why she's in such a predicament.

After a long silence, she sighed and went to unbutton his shirt.

Shen Chen was a little stunned, but he didn't stop it.

One, two, three...

The shirt was taken off, and Xu Su threw it into his arms, saying, "It smells like women's perfume. Wash it off first, and we'll talk after you've calmed down."

After saying that, she interrupted his explanation and walked out.

Shen Chen was afraid she would leave, so he tried to chase after her, but after being glared at fiercely, he obediently stopped, and the bathroom door was closed.

The sound of water rose and then quickly disappeared.

Shen Chen came out wearing a bath towel, water droplets still sliding down his lean waist and abdomen, and his hair was also wet.

He stood by the bed and explained earnestly, "I had a get-together with some friends tonight. The perfume was from their female companions. I didn't touch them, not even a finger."

Xu Su leaned against the bed, seemingly oblivious to his explanation. She merely raised her eyes slightly, looking him up and down as if seeing him for the first time.

That look made Shen Chen's heart tremble. He couldn't help but get into bed and reach out to hug her, but Xu Su stepped back and pushed him away a little.

“I was there tonight too, and I heard what you were saying,” she said after a moment’s thought, “like those things about raising, cleaning, training, and stuff like that.”

I see.

Shen Chen's gaze fell on the red marks on her neck, and he finally understood why she always said she wasn't clean.

"They were just joking. I never meant it that way. It's my fault for making you misunderstand," he said cautiously, his lips trembling slightly. "Is that why you..."

Xu Su tightened her collar, and instead of answering, asked, "When did you start 'developing' this habit?"

She started receiving scholarships in fifth grade, when she was only eleven years old.

"At fifteen, the company had a plan at the time..."

Xu Su raised her hand to stop his long explanation, and gave him a half-smile, "I've already cheated on you, why aren't you breaking up with me?"

Shen Chen's eyes were still a little red, and upon hearing this, he looked as if he was about to shed tears again, staring intently at her.

Xu Su looked away, feeling a bit overwhelmed, and heard him say, "You misunderstood what they said, that's why you did this, right?"

"..." Xu Su fell silent.

Shen Chen grasped her shoulders and pulled her into his arms without giving her a chance to refuse.

“I haven’t been trained or raised, but I love you. I’ve already ordered the engagement ring. You’re the only one I’ll ever be with,” he said, his voice choked with emotion. “No matter what you’ve done or what’s unclean about you, I don’t care. I really don’t care about any of that.”

"So magnanimous?" Xu Su placed her hand on his chest and asked with a smile, "You really don't mind me sleeping with other people?"

This is the girl he risked his life for, someone more precious than his own life. His possessiveness towards her is off the charts, so how could he not care?

Just thinking about how, half an hour ago, on this very bed, she was under another man, being...

A trembling sound escaped Shen Chen's throat as he held her tightly, his teeth clenched, and said, word by word, "Promise me, there won't be a next time."

As he spoke, he opened his shirt, looked at the red marks, and ran his trembling fingers over them.

“I didn’t do it. Don’t go looking for trouble with Jiang Chusheng. Nothing happened between us,” Xu Su held his hand, thought for a moment, and explained seriously, “I originally wanted to do it, but then I remembered something and didn’t continue.”

She didn't say what she remembered.

Shen Chen didn't even dare to guess.

He hugged her again, his whole body stiff. Normally, he was so reckless and fearless that he didn't dare to say a word.

Xu Su knew what words to say to make the man in front of her feel pain and despair, and even knew how to make him die again.

Can……

She couldn't bear it.

Humans aren't plants or trees; after all these years, she knows how important she is to him, how could she bear to do that?

The man, especially, who was burying his face in the crook of her shoulder, was still sobbing intermittently.

Like a little dog worried that its owner will abandon it, it's both pitiful and adorable.

Xu Su could clearly feel that her heart was aching.

I feel sorry for Shen Chen.

Shen Chen, who died once.

Shen Chen, who was reborn at the age of fifteen, secretly guarded her.

Shen Chen was filled with anxiety every day, fearing that she would go to the capital and that the treasures he was guarding would be discovered.

Shen Chen was so good to her that he never lost his temper with her, and even when she cheated on him, he couldn't bear to say a harsh word to her.

Shen Chen, who was consumed by jealousy and despair upon learning that she had slept with someone else, still managed to smile and say he didn't mind.

After a long silence, Xu Su heard her own voice.

“It’s fine if we don’t break up, and I can never go to the capital,” she said. “But Shen Chen, I will not marry you, nor will I have children. In this life, I only want to do what I want to do.”

The man buried in her shoulder was stiff and motionless, and Xu Su waited patiently.

After a long while, Shen Chen's hoarse voice rang out.

"……What's up?"

“It has nothing to do with men. As long as you don’t come back smelling like other women’s perfume, I can date you for the rest of my life,” Xu Su patted the back of his head, explaining gently, “Learning is endless. I want to study hard. Shen Chen, can you accept not getting married and not having children for the rest of your life?”

A lifetime of love...

“Okay,” Shen Chen looked up, his eyes sparkling. “Su Su, let’s not have anyone else in our lives. Can you promise me that?”

It's okay not to get married, it's even better not to have children, but there can't be anyone else.

Xu Su realized that the man in front of her was extremely insecure.

She thought for a moment, then nodded, "Okay, I promise you."

Shen Chen actually has a pretty good temper. Compared to someone who tries to control everything and wants to put her in their pocket and take her everywhere, Shen Chen gives her the greatest freedom and supports her in doing whatever she wants.

The only requirement is that she doesn't go looking for anyone else.

this is very simple.

Xu Su thought.