Starting a new chapter in life

I was born into a prominent family in Haishi. At its peak, half of Haishi was our family's property. Of course, such a huge asset belonged to the main branch, while my family was a collateral branch.

Even if they were from a collateral branch, they were considered wealthy by the general public. Even if there were only four people in the family—parents, siblings, and grandparents—they lived in a small courtyard with a gatekeeper and five or six servants to take care of them. They were quite well-off.

It is said that the family had supported the national army during the War of Resistance against Japan, so the family itself was not affected after the founding of the People's Republic of China. However, with the arrival of the Great Movement, everything changed.

When the major movement began, I was still young and in school. The main branch of the family received some advance notice and liquidated their assets early on. Family members also left the mainland in batches, first going to Hong Kong and then eventually leaving for overseas.

Because my family belongs to a relatively distant branch and has few members, and my parents are not good at flattery, we are already marginal figures in the family. But it is precisely these marginal figures who are naturally abandoned by the main branch and kept as pawns to attract attention from all sides.

Of course, they didn't treat us badly. At least before they left, they transferred a street of shops to my parents' names, as well as some jewelry and calligraphy and paintings... In short, they left my family everything that was inconvenient to carry or difficult to dispose of.

By the time my parents received the news, the person had already been gone for half a month. My parents were heartbroken, but they had to pull themselves together and find a way out for our family. When the movement began, my parents made a decisive decision to donate all the family's antiques, paintings, shops, and the machinery factory that originally belonged to our family to the local government.

With this title, at least we weren't subjected to things like being paraded through the streets and criticized. Besides, it was only because Red Guards suspected we were hoarding money that we officially donated it all.

Everyone knew that my family belonged to a collateral branch and was not wealthy to begin with. After donating so much of our family property, no one pursued the matter further. But we were, after all, descendants of capitalists, and apart from not being criticized or denounced, our situation was not exactly optimistic.

When I was sixteen, right after graduating from junior high school, my parents arranged for me to go to the countryside as an educated youth. Since I applied voluntarily, I had the right to choose where I went. My parents arranged for me to go to a village with relatively better conditions. At least there were two cows in the village, so I wouldn't be doing farm work by hand.

Even under such conditions, my small frame almost gave out during my first year there. Fortunately, the village secretary took care of me because I wasn't too old, but even with that help, farm work was still very hard.

Before long, my once fair skin darkened by two shades, and my hands were covered in blisters, one batch of which would just heal before another appeared. Soon, calluses formed. I would hide under the covers and cry silently almost every day. Since there were several people in the room, crying out loud would disturb the neighbors.

The brigade leader's youngest daughter, He Chunfen, is two years older than me. She's a cheerful and capable girl. She feels sorry for me because I'm young, so she'll come and help me after finishing her own work. I know she treats me like a younger brother, since she's the youngest in her family but still dreams of being an older sister.

I couldn't let her work for me for nothing, so I carried two White Rabbit candies with me every day and secretly slipped them to her when no one was looking. Originally, I really didn't intend to marry her. My family background was bad, while she was upright, capable, and, most importantly, beautiful. How could she possibly be interested in a educated youth like me who couldn't lift a finger?

But opportunity always comes unexpectedly. She was beautiful, and a minor leader in the county's revolutionary committee took a liking to her, wanting to marry her as his second wife. Ugh, that man was over thirty and still eyeing an eighteen-year-old girl—he had no shame whatsoever!

But that person was a petty scoundrel, and the brigade leader couldn't afford to offend him too much. He could only say that his daughter was already engaged and the wedding was coming up soon. It wouldn't be right for him to marry off his daughter twice. He had just made that statement over there and was now in a hurry to marry off his daughter.

But everyone in the surrounding villages knows each other. If Xiaofen really had someone she liked, she wouldn't still be unmarried. The brigade leader was anxious on one hand, but on the other hand, he didn't want to wrong his daughter. He looked around but couldn't come up with a solution.

When I heard the news, I took the initiative to go to his house and volunteer myself. Although I was not good at anything, I had a good temper and a decent personality. I was also an educated youth with little influence and would not bully my wife. So the brigade leader reluctantly accepted me as his prospective son-in-law.

The marriage was arranged quickly. From my visit to the wedding to the wedding itself, it took less than a month. They were afraid that things might go wrong if they waited too long. Fortunately, at that time, the government was cracking down hard, and the minor leaders of the Revolutionary Committee didn't dare to be too blatant. So the marriage went smoothly.

After marriage, it really became a case of the man staying at home and the woman working outside. After all, I really couldn't do farm work. I stayed at home to do housework, laundry, and cooking. Although some people in the village laughed at me, I was thick-skinned and calmly accepted all the strange looks. Being looked at a couple of times wouldn't hurt me, so what was there to be afraid of?

But Chunfen didn't want me to suffer. If she heard others gossiping about me, she would grab a shovel and go to their door to argue. She was very assertive. After a while, people stopped gossiping about me, and our lives became peaceful.

In the third year of our marriage, Chunfen discussed with me that she was twenty-one years old and wanted to have a child. I knew she was worried that I still wanted to go back to the city and that I wouldn't want to have children in the countryside. But I hadn't planned to go back to the city anyway; I was fine here.

After that, naturally, she got pregnant. I couldn't bear to see her working so hard to earn work points anymore, so I secretly took out the money I had hidden and showed it to her. To this day, I still clearly remember the shocked look in her eyes when she saw my metal box full of money.

That's right, even a wrecked boat has some nails, and besides, my family's property wasn't confiscated. Even though our visible assets were all taken, we still managed to keep some small, valuable items and some money.

Because I came from the countryside, my parents didn't bring me anything else, but they gave me a lot of money. If I ran out of money, they would write a letter back home and send me money. I didn't lack money, but I didn't have any coupons. Fortunately, I didn't need many coupons in the countryside.

Furthermore, I have been well taken care of by everyone since I came here. Although I am a bit short of food, I have hardly ever spent money. The money I brought has hardly been spent. Chunfen saw my financial situation and felt at ease. After that, she reduced her workload and only took half of the work points.

The villagers all thought that my family was being helped by the brigade leader, and no one suspected me. Actually, it was quite good to live like this. I would have a warm home, a home with a wife and children.

But the unexpected happened so suddenly. Around the time of the summer harvest that year, there was a lot of rain. Not to mention me, even Chunfen had to go to the fields to rush the harvest. She was eight months pregnant and went to the fields with me. I was terrified just watching her.

I tried to persuade her not to go, saying I would go instead, but Chunfen disagreed, and the brigade leader also objected. After all, many of the women in the village were still working in the fields during the production season, and people in those days were very resilient. I couldn't persuade them otherwise.

That's how the accident happened. Chunfen slipped and fell, belly down. She was in so much pain that she couldn't move. People around her quickly lifted her onto an oxcart and rushed her to the town hospital, but Chunfen was already unconscious.

Despite the hospital's best efforts, Chunfen suffered a difficult childbirth, resulting in the deaths of both herself and her unborn child. At the time, I was working with the able-bodied men in the village to dig an irrigation canal. When I heard the news, it was like a bolt from the blue. By the time I rushed to the hospital, Chunfen had already passed away. I missed seeing her one last time.

I was stunned. I stood there dumbfounded by her bedside, staring at her face. Later, my father-in-law dragged me away. Chunfen's body was taken back to the village, a coffin was made, a burial site was chosen, and she was buried...

At that time, the crackdown was severe, so funerals were kept simple, and no family dared to hold a grand event. I was useless and couldn't help with anything; I could only stand by the coffin in a daze. My father-in-law couldn't bear to see this and took over Chunfen's funeral arrangements.

Only after Chunfen's burial could I finally shed tears. Living in the house we built ourselves, I always felt that she hadn't left, that she was still here. Every time I cooked, I would subconsciously make enough for two people. My mother-in-law was worried about me and would often come over to bring me things and check if I was still alive.

Looking at the old couple's gray hair, I suddenly felt a sense of purpose and started to cheer up and go to the fields to earn work points. Even if I could only get six or seven work points, it was still much better than before.

My father-in-law and mother-in-law finally breathed a sigh of relief. Later, when I was in a better mood, whenever I mentioned my state at that time, my mother-in-law would always say that she was very worried that I might do something rash one day and just die. She didn't want anything to happen to me.

After my wife passed away, many people in the village brought up the topic of finding another wife, either through my mother-in-law or directly in front of me. My mother-in-law even asked me twice, but I refused both times. I've met the best one, so there's no need to settle. After refusing so many times, no one brought it up anymore.

Four years later, the movement ended, and my parents tried to get me to return to the city. I didn't want to leave at first, as I wanted to take care of my parents in their old age and see them off in their final days in place of Chunfen. In the end, my father-in-law chased me away. He said that he still had his son and grandson, and it was really not my turn to take care of them in their old age and see them off in their final days. He told me to hurry back to the city, because I couldn't keep up with anything in the countryside and that I was just a burden.

I knew they didn't want to hold me back. My parents kept sending me letters urging me to return to the city, and later they even sent me telegrams urging me to come back. After much thought, I finally left. After returning to the city, I was assigned to work as a technician in a military factory. Although I didn't have a high level of education, my family used to run a machinery factory, so my foundation was quite solid.

After adapting for a while, I settled down in the factory. When I came back, I learned that my younger sister, who was four years younger than me, had been married off by our parents to a military officer from Beijing when she was just twenty years old. She went with him to the military. After all, given my family's background, only families with strong connections dared to marry her back then.

As soon as I returned to Haishi, my parents started arranging blind dates for me. I'm good-looking and have a job, so it wouldn't be hard for me to find someone, but I'm not interested anymore. I've refused twice already, but seeing my mother's tearful face, I just can't bring myself to do it.

To solve the problem once and for all, I had to lie and say that Chunfen had passed away. After having no one to help me with the farm work, my health had been damaged, and I was no longer able to have children. Since I couldn't have children, why drag someone else down with me for life?

As for finding someone with children, not only me, but even my mother wouldn't agree to that idea, so the matter of remarriage just fell through.

After I got a stable job, I sent ten yuan from my monthly salary to my mother-in-law as a way of showing filial piety to Chunfen and me. But I never expected that before they passed away, they would send all the money I had sent back over the years back to me, saying that they had been saving it for me.

They loved me like a son, but I didn't even get to see them one last time. This is the second regret of my life.

Later, my parents passed away one after another, leaving me all alone in Shanghai. Every day, apart from going to and from get off work, I had no energy for anything. Occasionally, I would play chess or play the guqin to pass the time.

Until He Zhijun somehow found out about me and came to my door asking me to come to his house to help tutor his two children in their extracurricular classes. Maybe I had been lonely for too long, but for a moment I was suddenly tempted. However, I still needed to see the children's aptitude before making a decision. After all, even if I were emotionally stable, I wouldn't want to teach such a blockhead.

Meeting the two children was a pleasant surprise. They were smart, eager to learn, and quick to grasp concepts. Most importantly, they were good-looking and pleasing to the eye. I readily accepted the job, agreeing to let them come and eat for me every day.

The food at his house was so delicious, much better than what I make. My main purpose was to come and eat there, and teaching the kids was just a side thing. We originally agreed that I would only teach the two younger ones, but it turned into four, and then five or six. However, I just taught the older kids along with them. I didn't expect them to learn anything special; I just wanted them to listen in on the lessons.

These children are really smart. I went from not paying much attention to them to devoting myself to teaching them. I'm surprised at how quickly I've changed things.

With the children's company, my mood, which had been depressed for more than ten years, has become much more relaxed. Many times, I don't see them as my students, but rather as my own children, so the level of care I give them is naturally different.

The children did not disappoint me, especially Zhizhi, who truly surpassed me in learning the arts I excelled in, such as playing the zither, chess, calligraphy, and painting. She later became a director, and her directorial works featured a lot of traditional Chinese elements.

Other directors' films about ancient dances, guzheng and guqin performances, and Go games are always criticized by sharp-eyed netizens, but her films are universally praised for their professionalism. I am always happy to see such comments. This girl is indeed very talented.

An'an is relatively lacking in this aspect, but he is a good older brother. For his sister, he ventured into the completely unfamiliar film and television industry and actually succeeded in making it. Although I helped a lot in the early stages, he wouldn't have been able to do it for long if he didn't have the ability.

Seeing my two children doing so well, I can leave with a smile even when I'm gone. Before I go, I'll give my remaining assets to them. They don't need anything, but as their teacher and uncle, it's also a token of my goodwill...