Bro, you are a policeman, not a thug

The autumn breeze blows gently outside the window, and the bedroom is filled with a faint warmth.

Lying on the soft bed.

Xiao Mu hugged Brother Qiu with one hand and held the tablet in the other.

A melodramatic romance drama is playing on the tablet.

After watching for ten minutes, Xiao Mu felt like he was blind.

Did you know that he is really blind?

For example, the heroine’s explosive line: Apart from being beautiful, having a good figure and being rich, I have nothing else, and I feel that life has no meaning.

The male protagonist’s lines are even more awesome and cool: Actually, I’m the same. Apart from my strong work ability, good family background and owning a company of my own, I have nothing else to offer.

Female lead: So you also understand this feeling?

Male protagonist: Yes, I often feel inferior because of this.

What a fucking inferiority complex... Xiao Mu almost went crazy seeing this.

No, do the male and female protagonists think they are very humorous?

What kind of genius screenwriter can come up with such eye-catching lines and plots?

Is this what's scary?

No, the scary thing is that Brother Qiu actually likes to watch it.

Or do all girls like to watch this kind of drama?

Xiao Mu took out his cell phone feeling tired.

After being on a mission for so many days, I have to report to my parents that I am safe.

Ye Qiuling in his arms was smiling and waiting to watch the show.

Every time Choubao chats with his family, he is happy and she also enjoys watching it...

Family Group dialog box.

Xiao Mu: Calling Father, the Emperor, and Mother, the Empress, I have come specially to pay my respects to you.

half an hour.

Just when Xiao Mu thought his parents were busy.

Xiao Guodong: Oh, isn’t this my long-lost son? How come he just got out of prison?

Xiao Mu: ...

No, when did dad become so naughty?

Xiao Mu: Dear father and son, don’t be like this. Dad, there is something I want you to help me think of a solution.

Xiao Guodong: I can’t do anything about money, go find your mother.

Xiao Mu: It’s not about money. I’ve become addicted to smoking recently. I smoke a pack a day now.

Xiao Guodong: Is a pack a day considered a heavy smoker? Are you trying to maintain your health?

Xiao Mu: ...

He now finally understood why some people said: Two kinds of people can sleep in the same bed.

Dad has been successfully led astray by Mom!

Xiao Mu: Dad, how many cigarettes do you smoke a day recently?

Xiao Guodong: I have quit buying cigarettes. I smoke if someone gives them to me, and ask for them if they don’t.

Xiao Mu: ...Have you successfully helped everyone around you quit smoking?

Xiao Guodong: So what? I’m just helping others. I don’t have any money anyway.

Xiao Mu: Dad, don’t you think this is a mean thing to do?

Xiao Guodong: Be polite when you speak to me, or I’ll beat you up.

Xiao Mu: We are father and son, father and son, why do you seem to have a grudge against me?

Xiao Guodong: Mainly because I’m afraid you’ll ask for money.

Xiao Mu: ???

Xiao Guodong: What are you asking? I’m pretending that I don’t know you well, so I can pretend not to see your message.

Xiao Mu: I really... forget it, let me feel sorry for myself first. Dad, are you really not afraid that I will have to eat dirt?

Xiao Guodong: It is good to eat soil, it is rich in minerals, so eat more.

Xiao Mu: Dad, why don’t we just forget each other?

Xiao Guodong: Okay, stop pretending to be pitiful. This is your dad’s and my private money… oh no, it’s not much pocket money. How much do you want?

Xiao Mu: Father, do you think five hundred is okay?

Xiao Guodong: Are you fucking robbing me? Five hundred yuan is enough to file a case.

Xiao Mu: ...

Xiao Guodong: How about we toss a coin?

Xiao Mu: Okay, then I should choose the front or the back.

Xiao Guodong: No need to choose, I will give you money if the coin is broken.

Xiao Mu: ...Dad, you forced me to do this.

Xiao Guodong: What’s going on? The little rabbit wants to rebel, but I will never give him any money.

Xiao Mu: I remember there is a set of Journey to the West on our bookshelf, Volume 3, Page 22. Dad, please read it carefully.

Xiao Guodong: Son, you don’t know how much your dad misses you recently. Five hundred yuan, right? No problem, I’ll transfer it to you right away.

Xiao Mu: (〃￣︶￣)ㄏ

Xiao Guodong: ㄟ(￣︶￣〃)

The father and son forced their way to a consensus.

Sudden.

Liu Yunying: Have you two forgotten one thing? This is a family group, and I can see it too?

Xiao Mu: ...

Xiao Guodong: ...

……

Xiao Mu quickly closed WeChat.

I succeeded in tricking my dad, so happy!

"It's bad."

Ye Qiuling bit his neck and couldn't stop laughing, "You're cheating on your dad."

"What happened?"

Xiao Mu smiled proudly and said, "My dad cheated me a lot when I was a kid."

"I still remember when I was little, I was playing on the sofa while my dad was eating sunflower seeds and my mom was sweeping the floor."

"My dad accidentally kicked over the trash can containing melon seed shells, and before I could react, he picked me up and put me next to the trash can."

"He actually scolded me with a serious face: 'Look at you, you're just being naughty. Don't you know your mother is sweeping the floor?'

"I was completely stunned. Before I could react, my mom rushed over and spanked me so hard I screamed."

"Just when I was about to expose that it was my dad who did it, I found that my dad took out ten dollars from his pocket, and then..."

"What happened next?" Ye Qiuli asked with a smile.

"I took it all on silently!"

Xiao Mu covered his face in shame.

"Ha ha……"

Ye Qiuling almost died of laughter, and sobbed while hugging her stinky baby.

"Laughing fart."

Xiao Mu held Qiu Ge in his arms and patted her little butt gently. "Wait until the baby is born, and you'll see if I beat you up or not."

"Kill you."

Ye Qiuling pouted and gave him a delicate punch, "And you let your mother-in-law beat you."

"You only know how to threaten me with my mother."

Xiao Mu rolled his eyes and said, "If you have the guts, don't call your parents."

"Just call."

Ye Qiu'er's eyebrows flew up and she twisted her little butt proudly.

Why don't you go to heaven... Xiao Mu smirked, "Believe it or not, I will start selecting concubines right away. There must be three palaces and six courtyards."

"You dare." Ye Qiuling huffed.

"I dare not do it openly."

Xiao Mu threatened her, "But I can come secretly. I just want to ask my beloved concubine, are you afraid?"

"This……"

Ye Qiuling was frightened and immediately gave in, hugging his neck and acting like a spoiled child. "Your Majesty, I was just bragging. I will never dare to bully you again, okay?"

"Okay, okay, stop acting like a spoiled child. I get it."

Xiao Mu's bones felt ten pounds lighter and he felt numb.

"Ha ha……"

Ye Qiuling was pleased with herself, knowing exactly what tricks he was going to fall for. She asked with a smile, "Choubao, if one day you and your adopted sons traveled back to ancient times and you became emperor, how would you treat them?"

"If I become emperor, my good brothers must be inseparable."

Xiao Mu's eyes rolled. "For example, the boss was called Xiaopeng before. I must give him a new name, Xiaopeng."

Ye Qiuling: (⊙_⊙)

What do you mean?

"Originally he was the Peng of Dapeng."

Xiao Mu smirked, "I will give you a friend without a bird."

Ye Qiuling: ...

Choubao is so bad.

But why can’t I hold back my laughter? Help!