Eastern Han Dynasty, not the Three Kingdoms

Zhang Ji's heart was a whirlwind of mixed emotions, filled with frustration and turmoil. How could he not realize that now was far from the best time to launch an expedition? With the intertwined forces, the situation was a tangled mess, shrouded in uncertainty. Going to assist Ma Chao would undoubtedly be a dangerous undertaking, with its outcome uncertain. But he had long understood Zhang Xiu's character. Even when he first arrived at the army, the young man had demonstrated remarkable poise, measured demeanor, and clear organization. He was completely bereft of the youthful impatience that would be expected from his youth, instead displaying a maturity belying his years. But Zhang Ji knew clearly that Zhang Xiu might be forcing himself, trying to appear reliable to others, simply because he feared his illness would burden him and burden him with the trivialities of the military. Every thought of this filled Zhang Ji with a wave of emotion and pity.

Now, with Ma Chao's arrival, Zhang Xiu seemed a changed man. His once suppressed youthful nature suddenly revived, his face brimming with pure, genuine joy and excitement. His enthusiasm and energy, like a dazzling ray of light, dispelled the long-held gloom. Watching Zhang Xiu like this, Zhang Ji couldn't help but wonder, perhaps this was Zhang Xiu's true self: a youth meant to be free and unfettered, a youth not burdened by heavy responsibilities and pressures, a life weighing on him. In these treacherous and difficult times, with Ma Chao's protection, Zhang Xiu might find less adversity and more peace and prosperity. This seemed like a viable path.

He knew that while Zhang Xiu might be endangered by helping Ma Chao, the joy and excitement on his face were genuine and unadulterated. How could he bear to leave him in such a dilemma? Furthermore, after repeated discussions with Jia Xu, he had already come to believe that returning to Xiliang was the long-term strategy. Jia Xu's analysis was certainly sound, but as a veteran of battle, how could he not understand the passionate bond between men? Zhang Xiu's words were not without reason. Adding icing on the cake might bring temporary benefits, but providing timely assistance could forge a lifelong friendship.

Since he had already made up his mind to entrust everything to Zhang Xiu, why bother him with such a matter? Sooner or later, Zhang Xiu would have to make the journey to Wancheng alone, so what difference would it make if he arrived earlier or later? Thinking of this, Zhang Ji sighed deeply. Although he still had some concerns in his heart, he could only nod in agreement.

Meanwhile, Zhang Xiu, immersed in his joy, failed to notice that beside him, Zou's eyes were welling with tears. Though uninformed about military affairs and possessing only a passing understanding of the current situation, Zou knew that Zhang Xiu's journey to assist Ma Chao would be fraught with danger and a near-fatal escape. However, due to her aunt's status and reserved demeanor, she felt constrained by her deep concerns and anxieties, unable to offer any advice. She could only bury her worries and concerns deep within her heart, her heart tangled like a tangled knot, silently praying for Zhang Xiu's safe return.

Zhang Xiu finally got his uncle's consent. His heart was beating like a deer, and he was filled with excitement about telling Ma Chao the good news. His thoughts had already drifted to Ma Chao's tent. He looked absent-minded, and even his eyes were a little wandering.

Zhang Ji observed all of this. Although he had already agreed to Zhang Xiu's request, he couldn't help but feel a little disappointed when he saw his nephew so eager to leave him. So he deliberately put on a stern face and said in feigned anger, "Ah Xiu, what's wrong? We just got your permission, and you don't want to stay with your uncle for a moment? Is your uncle so insignificant in your heart?" Zhang Xiu was startled back to his senses by this sudden rebuke. A wry smile instantly covered his face. He hurried forward and said with a mixture of flattery and guilt, "Alas, Uncle, you misunderstood Ah Xiu. You hold a place in my heart that is as important as Mount Tai. Ah Xiu has no intention of disrespecting you. It's just that I couldn't hold back this good news and wanted to share it with General Ma Chao as soon as possible."

Zhang Ji sighed slightly and slowly raised his hand, which was trembling slightly due to illness. Zhang Xiu's eyes warmed up when he saw this, and he quickly leaned close to Zhang Ji, as if to use his body to provide his uncle with a little warmth and support. Zhang Ji's hand gently fell on the top of Zhang Xiu's head, and his dry fingers stroked it slowly with endless love and reluctance, each stroke seemed to be telling every bit of the past. His eyes were full of pity, and his voice trembled slightly with excitement: "Ah Xiu, your uncle's body is like a candle in the wind, and it won't last many days. You are about to lead the army to war, and the journey is long and the mountains are high, and it is hard to predict whether it will be good or bad. Today, just put the outside world behind you, don't go anywhere, just stay by your uncle's side and accompany my old bones peacefully." These affectionate words, like waves, stirred up thousands of waves in Zhang Xiu's heart, filling his heart with guilt, reluctance and sadness.

Zhang Xiu felt his nose suddenly sore, and a hot stream rushed into his eyes. Tears blurred his eyes instantly and fell uncontrollably. His voice became intermittent due to sobbing: "Uncle, Ah Xiu knows he was wrong. Ah Xiu will stay by your side these days and will not go anywhere. She will stay with you like we did when we were children. Uncle, please don't say such sad words. Your words are like a sharp knife piercing Ah Xiu's heart, making Ah Xiu feel anxious and painful." Zhang Ji looked at Zhang Xiu's tears and said, "Uncle, Ah Xiu knows I was wrong. I will stay by your side these days and will not go anywhere. I will stay with you like we did when we were children. Uncle, please don't say such sad words anymore. Your words are like a sharp knife piercing Ah Xiu's heart, making her feel anxious and painful." He looked like he was being drenched in tears, and his heart was filled with an unbearable bitterness. He forced his last bit of energy and managed to force a smile, but it was filled with bitterness and kindness. He gently wiped the tears from Zhang Xiu's cheek with his rough thumb and comforted him, "My child, don't cry. Life and death are determined by fate, and wealth and honor are determined by God. Men like us who have fought bravely on the battlefield and experienced countless battles should not be indifferent to life and death. It's just that your uncle is worried about you, afraid that you will encounter an accident in this chaotic world."

This conversation between the uncle and nephew, filled with both deep affection and helplessness, was like a sharp hook, drawing out the long-suppressed sorrow and sadness in Zou's heart. Finally, unable to hold it back, she broke down in tears. The low sobs echoed in the silent room, sounding particularly poignant.

Zou's crying voice reached Zhang Ji's ears, and it seemed to ignite the fire of irritability in his heart. He frowned and said impatiently: "Cry, cry, cry, you woman, all you know is to cry! What is there to cry about? Go down, go down and prepare some wine and food. Ah Xiu will have dinner here today." Zou was frightened by the sudden rebuke. She quickly covered her mouth with her sleeves and suppressed her crying. She did not dare to stay any longer. She turned around and left in a hurry to tell the servants to prepare wine and food.

Zhang Xiu watched Zou's retreating figure. Her slightly trembling shoulders, filled with a thousand grievances and sorrow, filled him with a pang of heartache. He turned to Zhang Ji and said, "Uncle, how dare you drink in your current state? My aunt is simply moved by our conversation and worried about the future. Why reprimand her so harshly?" Zhang Ji waved his hand nonchalantly, saying, "Ah Xiu, she says she's your aunt, but in reality, she's just a beautiful woman I stumbled upon in Luoyang. How many of this woman's tears are genuine? Don't trust them. Even if I'm gone, how much genuine sadness can she possibly harbor? Ah Xiu, remember, as passionate men, we must not be burdened by our emotions. Women's tears, in particular, are the most untrustworthy."

Zhang Xiu secretly felt that his uncle's words were too arbitrary and unreasonable. But he knew that his uncle had spent his life on the battlefield, accustomed to the glare of swords and the straightforwardness of life. How could he have the subtlety and understanding to understand a woman's feelings? Although he disagreed, out of respect for his uncle, he silently swallowed his words of rebuttal and instead advised, "Uncle, please don't be so easily angered. This is just a small matter. Why hurt yourself over it?"

Zhang Ji had a vague sense that Zhang Xiu harbored feelings for Zou, and how could the look of deep affection and fascination he saw as he gazed at her from behind escape his gaze? But he didn't want to dwell on it, nor did he care to dwell on it. He was already nearing death, while his nephew was still young. The future glory and inheritance of the Zhang family, the spread of branches and the continuation of the bloodline, all depended on him. As long as his nephew remembered to light a pair of incense sticks and burn a handful of paper money for him during his death, that would be enough. As for the rest, why bother with it?

Zhang Ji keenly sensed Zhang Xiu's barely concealed unease. After Zou had arranged the wine and food, he ceased his coldness towards her. His attitude underwent a complete about-face, even his tone becoming more agreeable. Zhang Ji gently gestured to Zou to pour him some wine. He secretly decided to have a few drinks with Zhang Xiu today, and also to take this opportunity to have a good chat with his nephew.

Seeing this, Zhang Xiu quickly reached out and snatched the wine glass from Zhang Ji's hand, saying with concern, "Uncle, your health is so poor, how dare you drink any more? If you drink this wine, it will only worsen your condition." Zhang Ji's stubbornness suddenly surged upon hearing this, and he said with some displeasure, "What? You kid, I'm still alive and well, and you want to meddle in my affairs?" Despite his sarcasm, his eyes held undeniable authority. Zhang Xiu had no choice but to compromise, knowing his uncle's temper. "Uncle, just one drink, then. No more." Zhang Ji snorted, saying, "All right, just one drink then." With that, the uncle and nephew slowly filled their glasses and emptied them in one gulp.

Zhang Ji, struggling to hold himself together, breaths heavy, said, "Ah Xiu, eat! Uncle can't eat this much meat anymore. You're young and strong, so eat more." He then turned and asked Zou to pour wine for Zhang Xiu. Zhang Xiu felt a sense of unease at this, and a look of hesitation crossed his face. Zhang Ji, however, waved his hand nonchalantly, saying, "No problem. Let her pour you some wine. After I'm gone, it's up to you to decide whether she stays or goes. Everything in Wancheng depends on you." Zhang Xiu's anxiety grew even more intense, but with his uncle's repeated urgings and Zou's gentle and attentive care, he unknowingly devoured his meal and wine. By this point, Zhang Xiu was already half drunk, feeling groggy and disoriented. Finally, Zhang Ji arranged for servants to assist him as he returned to his residence.